Текст книги "Wait for You"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

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Текущая страница: 17 (всего у книги 21 страниц)

Chapter 28

I hadn’t really noticed it till then, but there had been a stress that Cam carried with him; the weight of keeping a secret he thought would destroy something he cared about. How I hadn’t recognized it before was beyond me.

But it was good now… mostly.

Part of me suspected that one of the reasons why he’d finally told me was because he didn’t believe what I said about the text. That maybe he hoped by opening up with me that I’d do the same.

I wished that was the case, but my secret would destroy what I cherished most.

Us.

But since it was Valentine’s Day, I refused to think about it. I was having the most perfect day and I wasn’t going to ruin it.

Cam had shown up at my door in the morning with a single red rose and with one after every single one of my classes. By the afternoon, I had half a dozen, which  turned into two dozen when he arrived at my apartment that evening. I hadn’t been sure of our plans, so I was relieved to see him in jeans and a sweater and nothing fancy.  It was late, after nine, since Valentine’s fell on a Friday, and I wasn’t sure if we were even going out.

Thanking his for the rose, I took them into the kitchen and added them to the vase. He remained by the door. “What are you doing?” I asked.

His grin was mischievous. “Stay right where you are and close your eyes.”

“I have to close my eyes?”

“Yep.”

I arched a brow as I tried to hide my burgeoning excitement. “So it’s a surprise?”

“Of course it is. So close your eyes.”

My lips twitched. “Your surprises are just as scary as your ideas.”

“My ideas and my surprises are brilliant.”

“Remember when you thought it would be a good idea to—”

“Close your eyes, Avery.”

Grinning, I dutifully closed my eyes. I heard him walk away and then a couple of moments later he reentered my apartment. “Don’t peek.”

Not peeking was like putting a slice of cake in front of me along with a fork and telling me not to eat it. I shifted my weight. “Cam…”

“A couple more seconds,” he said, and I heard something heavy roll inside.

What the? More than curious, it was a struggle to not open my eyes. I honestly had no idea what he was up to and with Cam, anything was possible.

His hand wrapped around mine. “Keep your eyes closed, okay?”

“They’re closed.” I let him lead me out of the kitchen and into my living room.

Cam let go of my hand and slid his arm around me from behind, pressing his cheek against me. Months ago I hated when anyone stood behind me, but I loved it when he did. The feel of his arms, the strength of his embrace, the intimacy behind it.

“You can open your eyes now.” His lips brushed my cheek, sending shivers across my skin. “Or you can stand there with your eyes closed. I like that, too.”

I laughed as I placed my hands above where his rest on my stomach and opened my eyes. My jaw hit the floor. “Oh my God, Cam…”

Before me, sitting on a stand, in a fifty gallon terrarium completely decked out with sand and rock bedding, leafy foliage and a hidey-hole, was a tortoise almost the size of my hand.

He chuckled. “You like?”

“Like?” Stunned, I nodded as I pulled free, placing my hands on the glass. The little guy inside pulled his head back. “I… I love it.”

“Good.” He stood beside me. “I thought Raphael could use a play date.”

I laughed again, blinking back tears. “You shouldn’t have done all of this, Cam. This is…too much.”

“It’s not that much and everyone needs a pet turtle.” He bent his head, kissing my cheek. “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

Spinning around, I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him like there was no tomorrow. When I pulled back, his eyes were pools of blue fire. “Thank you.”

He kissed me again, soft and achingly tender. “You’re welcome.”

Sliding my arms to his waist, I leaned against his chest. “Is it a boy or a girl?”

“You know, I really don’t know. Supposedly you can tell by the shape of their shell, but hell if I know.”

I grinned. “Well, boy or girl, I’m going to name him Michelangelo.”

Cam tipped his head back and laughed. “Perfect.”

“We just need two more.”

“So true.”

Wiggling free, smiled up at him. “Be right back.” I rushed into my bedroom and grabbed the card I’d stuck the tickets in. When I got back to the living room, Cam was adjusting the heat lamp on the terrarium. He turned, smiling softly. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” I said, all but shoving the card in his hands. My cheeks flushed. “It’s not as cool as your gift, but I hope you like it.”

“I’m sure I will.” Lips curved up on one said, he carefully opened the envelope and pulled the card out. I hadn’t written much in the card, because I had no idea what to write. I’d settled on a quick message and my name.

I held my breath as he opened the card. The half grin spread into a full smile as he slid the two tickets between his fingers. He peered up through his lashes. “This is an absolutely amazing gift, sweetheart.”

“Really?” I clasped my hands together, pleased. “I hoped you’d like it. I mean, I know not playing soccer sucks and I hope this doesn’t make you sad going to the game and you don’t have to take me—”

Cam claimed my mouth like a man half-starved. There was nothing slow about the kiss; it was a whole different level of seduction. “Of course I’m taking you. The gift is perfect,” he said, nipping at my lower lip in a way that caused heat to sweep over me, leaving me needy. “You’re perfect.”

An insidious voice crept in. If he only knew how far from perfect I really me. I pushed that thought away, letting myself fall into his kiss. That wasn’t hard. Not when he drank from me as if he’d been deprived of the act for far too long.

His hands dropped to my hips and he pulled me to him. Against my belly, I felt his arousal. Cam was a… sexual man, so it came as no surprise he was that hard that quickly, but it always amazed me how badly he did want me but never pushed for what I knew he’d be oh-so down for.

When his grip on my hips tightened, I looped my arms around his neck. We seemed to be on some unconscious agreement, because he lifted me as I wrapped my legs around his waist. I moaned as he pressed against me and his tongue swept across mine.

He started walking, and my blood thundered in my veins. I knew where he was heading and excitement and nervousness warred inside me. He laid me on the bed and I leaned back, down the center. Pausing long enough to tug his sweater off over his head, he then placed his hands on either side of my head. The power and strength in his arms and body was overwhelming but not frightening.

Reaching up, I traced my finger over the flames surrounding the sun on the left side of his chest. “I love this tattoo,” I admitted. “Why did you get it?”

A half-grin appeared. “You really want to know?”

“Yes.”

“It’s pretty lame.”

I followed the sun around his pec. “I’ll be the judge of that.”

“I got it after the fight.” Cam shifted so his knees were against my outer thighs and slid his hands under my shirt. I lifted up, helping him take it off. I have no clue where it ended up. He sort of just tossed it behind him. “I was kind of messed up for a while. Couldn’t go back to school, was stuck in my home, and I’d done that to myself. I was worried that there had been something wrong with me to lose it like I did.”

My hands fell to my sides as he placed one of his on my bare stomach. The tips of his fingers reached the underwire of my bra and the front closure.

“I was depressed,” he admitted. His hair tumbled forward, falling over his forehead as he placed his other hand beside my head. “I was pissed off at myself and the world and all that bullshit.” Pausing, he ran his hand down my belly and then back up, causing me to wiggle. That slight smile was back. “I think I drank just about every liquor my dad had in his bar over the course of a couple of weeks. I knew my parents were worried, but…”

Cam trailed off as he lowered his head, kissing the space between my breasts. I sucked in a sharp breath and he did it again. “Jase came to visit me often. So did Ollie. I probably would’ve lost my fucking mind without them. May I?” He looked up, eyes filled with intent, his fingers on the clasp of my bra.”

My heart jumped. This was a first for us. Mouth dry, I nodded.

“Thank you,” he said, and I thought that was a strange thing to be thankful for. His gaze lowered again, and my breath caught. He unhooked the delicate clasp, but didn’t part the cups. “It was something Jase had said to me while I was drunk off my ass. Don’t know why, but it stuck with me.”

I drew in a ragged breath as he trailed a finger down the center of my chest. “What did… what did he say?”

Cam glanced up through thick lashes. “He said something like things can’t be that bad if the sun is out and shining. Like I said, that stuck with me. Maybe because it’s the truth. As long as the sun’s shining, shit can’t be that bad. So that’s why I got a tattoo of the sun. Sort of a reminder.”

“That’s not lame,” I said.

“Hmm…” He plucked up the edge of my bra and gently pushed it to the side and then repeated the same motion on the other cup. Cool air teased the tips of my already hard breasts. I was completely bare for him from the waist up. “God, you’re beautiful, Avery.”

I think I said thank you, but I wasn’t sure if the words were coherent or not. He ran his hands over my breasts and my back arched off the bed at the contact of his flesh against mine. He said something too low for me to understand as he smoothed his thumb over my nipple. Beside my head, his arm flexed.

Cam looked up, meeting my gaze as he lowered his hand to the button on my jeans. There was a question in his eyes, and I nodded, wanting to know what he was going to do more than I was afraid.

He tugged my jeans off, then my socks. He commented on the skull and bones design, but the pounding in my body made it hard to pay attention. He then slid the bra off completely and when he had me just in my panties, his slow perusal of my body was like stepping out in the flaming August sun of Texas.

Our lips touched as he eased his weight onto his side. The kisses were slow and deep as his hand traveled over my chest. His touch was teasing and practiced as his kisses trailed over my chin, down my throat. I tensed in that second before his hot mouth closed on the tip of my breast. He’d done this before through my bra, but nothing could compare to the feeling of there being nothing between us. My blood turned to molten lava and my hips moved restlessly in tiny circles. As he sucked deep, his other hand traveled down, skimming my skin and then sliding under my panties.

My toes curled as his finger brushed the nub. New, stronger sensations pulsed throughout me. My head fell back as he slowly worked his head down, his fingers following the length of me.

He raised his head, his eyes boring into mine as he slipped the tip of his finger inside me. I gasped out, my fingers digging into his arms.

“Is this okay?” he asked, voice deep and smooth like aged whiskey.

Drawing in a breath, I nodded again. “Yes.”

A small, intimate smile tugged at his lips as pushed a little harder. My body was aflame as he started a pace, his eyes locked with mine. My entire body was shaking. The knot that formed whenever he touched me was much deeper and intense.

“You’re so tight,” he murmured, and then his kiss consumed me.

My hips were moving faster and he twisted his palm, pressing down on the sensitive numb. The feel of his bare chest rubbing against mine, his hand in my panties, his finger inside me—all of it was too much. I clenched around his hand, my thighs squeezing, and broke the kiss, crying out his name as release thundered through my body.

Cam made a deep sound as he nipped at my throat. “I love how you say my name.”

I could barely breathe, let alone speak as he continued to move inside me, working out every last spasm. When the tremors finally subsided, he eased his hand away and I was flush all over and heady. I wanted to give him more than what I’d been doing. Nervous and excited, I pressed my hands to his chest lightly and he rolled onto his back. Taking a deep breath, I straddled him and before I lost my nerve, I slid down him and unbuttoned his jeans, tugging them down his legs.

Cam caught on the moment I wrapped my fingers around him and my warm breath blew across his tip. His hands immediate fisted in my comforter.

“Oh shit,” he growled.

I smiled at the tortured sound of his voice and then I closed my mouth over him. His entire body jerked and his back bowed. I really didn’t have a clue when it came to doing this, but I figured it didn’t take much.

And it didn’t.

Cam enclosed one hand around mine as I took him and his other hand rested on the back of my neck with the slightest pressure, guiding my less than skilled movements. I wasn’t embarrassed or worried about doing it wrong. If his body and deep groans were any indication, I was doing enough right for him to be enjoying this.

He pulled me away before his release shuddered through him, sitting up half way and capturing my mouth as he came. I loved the way his body shook, but most of all, I loved that I felt safe and secure enough to do this. Tired I broke away, easing onto my back as he did the same, his chest rising and falling sharply. “This was the best fucking Valentine’s Day ever.”

A deep, throaty laugh escaped me. “I have to agree.”

His hand found mine between our bodies and squeezed. “You hungry?”

“No.” I smothered a yawn. “Are you?”

“Not yet,” he replied.

I had no idea what time it was, but I felt boneless and it would take an act of God to get me out of this bed. Or chocolate. One thing I did know was that I didn’t want him to leave. I worked up the nerve to ask for what I wanted. “Stay with me? The night?”

Cam’s hand trailed over my bare shoulder. “You don’t have to ask twice.” He kissed the edge of the shoulder. “Be right back.”

I rolled onto my side as he left, pulling the covers up over me. I heard water running in the bathroom and then he was back, sliding in behind me. With his arms around my waist and the length of his body pressed against mine, I smiled sleepily and thought about the sun.

Everything was perfect.

Chapter 29

The sun was shining all of February and through March. I spent half of spring break hanging out with Cam and Ollie at home and then the later part back at his parents’ house and we even got to hang out with Brit while she was home.

I found it strange that Brit didn’t seem to know what happened between Cam and his sister’s ex-boyfriend, but I didn’t bring it up. What Cam had told me had been personal and no matter my curiosity over whether or not she knew, I wasn’t going to violate that trust between us.

Especially when there’d been so many opportunities for me to open up to him. It was something that, no matter how many times I told myself I would do it, I couldn’t get the words past my tongue. The idea of confiding in Cam terrified me. It wouldn’t be easy and I really didn’t even know where to begin.

Instead I went out of my way to make sure my phone was never unsupervised around Cam. I was still receiving the texts and phone calls, at least two times a week, and I shied away from my email. Several times over the last two months, I almost responded to the text. Or I almost pulled up my email and responded to one of the messages.

Just like with Cam, I rather pretend it wasn’t happening than deal with it. I hated that part of me, loathed it really, because I was still running instead of facing anything.

As winter loosened its hold on the tiny speck of the state and the ground began to thaw, Cam was deciding on if he should pay a visit home over the mid-April weekend or hang out here and be lazy while Jacob spent lunch trying to convince Brit to accompany him to some kind of volunteer garden planting adventure.

Brit swirled her fry in a glob of mayo. Ollie watched her, handsome face twisted in awed-disgust. She was completely oblivious. “I’m not going to spend my last four day weekend of the semester planting daisies.”

“It’s not daises.” Jacob sighed. “It’s a botanical garden of wonder and love.”

Cam was sitting at the table, facing me. He dropped his head on my shoulder, hiding his snicker. I went with the old hand over the mouth method.

“That just sounds stupid.” Brit popped the mayo-covered fry in her mouth, and Ollie groaned. “I’m going to spend the four days being a veg.”

“Would you rather spend your time being a cucumber or making your soul feel happy?”

Cam’s shoulders started to shake.

“I think I will go with being a piece of broccoli,” Brit replied.

Across from us Ollie finally dragged his gaze away from Brit’s place and looked at Jacob. “Are you serious?”

“Yes!” He smacked his hands down. “Why not paint the world in beautiful flowers of all different colors?”

I stared at him. “Are you high?”

Jacob looked affronted… for maybe two seconds. “Maybe a little.”

Laughing, I glanced at Brit. “You should help him build his happy garden.”

She snorted. “You can help him.”

“Oh, no.” Cam lifted his head as he scooted toward me, slipping his hand over my leg, just above my knee.  “She’s all mine this weekend. No garden of love.”

“Unless she’s planting in your garden of love?” Jacob queried.

I rolled my eyes. “Cute.”

“Sounding like she was doing some planting last night.” Ollie moved the tiny paper cup of mayo further away from Brit. “At least from the noises coming from your bedroom.”

My mouth dropped open. “Whatever!”

“Did you have your ear plastered to my bedroom door?” Cam hand inched up, and my cheeks were suddenly burning for a whole different reason.

Ollie shrugged. “What else am I supposed to do?”

“Freak,” Cam tossed back.

The three of them launched into a discussion about vegetables, leaving Cam and I on the outside of the bizarro conversation, which was okay with me. I wasn’t a fan of vegetables.

“I have another great idea.” Cam propped his chin on my shoulder, voice low.

I turned my head just the slightest toward him. “Oh dear…”

“You’re going to love it.”

Warmth bubbled up my chest and I wanted to say I love you, but sitting in the Den, while our friends were discussing the pros and cons of asparagus didn’t seem like the best moment to blurt that out. So I settled with a, “What’s your idea?”

“Take the rest of the day off and chill with me.”

That sounded like an excellent idea. “I have class.”

“You have art. That doesn’t really count as a class.”

“How so?”

He lifted his head, pressing his lips to the space beside my ear. “You told me you almost fell asleep on Monday.”

“Almost,” I reiterated.

Cam now kissed the spot under my ear, and I shivered. “Trust me. What I want to do is so much better than art.”

My mind went straight to one thing. Sex. Like real sex with real penetration.

Oh my God, I couldn’t believe I just thought that. Was there a fake penetration I was unaware of? Actually, sort of. We’d done everything except sex. We’ve touched, groped, he’d gone down on me and I on him, but sex? There had been none of the actual act, but the last time, what Ollie was claiming he heard, it had seemed like we were heading there. There had been a certain intent

I’d panicked and basically went down on Cam. Not that he was complaining, but I couldn’t keep doing that. We had to take our relationship to the next level. Besides, I was probably the only twenty-year-old virgin on campus and how long would Cam wait for me to be ready? We’d been together for four months and guy time was like dog years so that was like four years.

Anticipation tingled throughout me, but under the excitement, unease formed like a ball of ice in my chest.

Cam circled his arms around my waist, pulling me out of my chair and into his lap. The people at our table basically ignored us, but the ones at the tables around us, were starting to stare.

He was totally unfazed by the attention as he tipped his head back, grinning widely. “So what do you say?”

“You two are so sickly sweet it’s actually cute,” Jacob said, interrupting us. We looked at him. “If you don’t skip art and run off with him, I’m going to kick your ass.”

“Well then, how can I say no?”

I just hoped that when it came down to it, I could say yes.

#

Cam really was extraordinary.

And I don’t know how he managed to continuously surprise me with his thoughtfulness or how it was even possible for him to be so wonderful. Or why it took me so long to pull my head out of my ass and to see that.

When we’d left the campus, he met me about my car and ushered me over to his truck. “What are we doing?”

“You’ll see.”

The secretive half smile had me on edge. It wasn’t until we hit I70 and I saw the sign did I know where we were going. I twisted toward him and in my excitement, I almost choked myself with the seatbelt.

Cam laughed.

“We’re going to D.C.? Aren’t we?” I exclaimed, practically bouncing in my seat.

He slid me a sly side look. “Maybe.”

“And we’re going to the Smithsonian, right?”

“Quite possibly.”

I flipped forward, clasping my hands together. “Why?” I blurted out. “I mean, I know history bores you, so why?”

“Why?” He laughed again as he messed with his baseball cap. “I told you that I’d go to the Smithsonian with you and I didn’t get to do it with you on your birthday, so I thought why not today?”

Why not today? That was one of the things I loved most about Cam. His ability to do things on the spur of the moment, no thought or plan behind them. He literally lived by the moment and nothing held him back, not even the trouble he’d gotten into, because he had moved past that.

Mainly because I knew he’d accepted what he’d done and the consequences of his actions. It may have taken him a few weeks after it happened, but he’d come to terms with it.

I admired that in him.

We spent the rest of the afternoon and most of the evening going from exhibit to exhibit. Cam seemed more interested in touching me and stealing kisses than what we were looking at and I was okay with that. I thought of the couples I’d watched last time and realized I had become one of them. It was so normal, so perfect. There was nothing different between us and them and I reveled in that.

It was late when we got home and since there were no classes on Thursday, we had the whole night. Buzzing from out impromptu trip, I dropped some of the stinky tortoise bites onto a little bowl and slipped it into Michelangelo’s home.

As I closed the lid on the terrarium, Cam came up behind me, placing his hands on my hips. He turned me around, and I stretched up, placing a kiss on his lips.

“Thank you for today,” I said, looping my arms around his neck. “I had a lot of fun.”

“I told you that my idea was great.”

“They usually are.”

“Holy shit.” His eyes widened in exaggerated surprise. “Did you just admit that?”

I grinned. “Maybe I did.”

“Uh-huh, you’ve always known my ideas hit a ten.”

“On a scale of 1 to 100, yes.”

“Ha. Ha.” His slid his hands up until they rested on my ribcage. “Guess what. Got another idea.”

“Does it involve eggs?”

A deep laugh burst from Cam and then he tugged my hips against his. “It doesn’t involve eggs.”

I had a good idea of what it involved. My stomach dipped. “It doesn’t?”

He shook his head. “But it does involve something equally tasty.”

My cheeks heated as I turned my head to the side.

His lips followed the movement, tracing my cheekbone. “And it involves you, me, a bed, and very little, if any, clothing.”

Tingles shot down my spine. “Does it now?”

“Yes.” Cam slid his hand down, under the band of my jeans so that his fingers rested over the swell of my rear. He brushed his lips over my brow. “What do you think?”

I wasn’t thinking. Tipping my head back, Cam obliged my silent invitation. His lips were mine and then his hands were under my shirt. He broke away long enough to tug my shirt off and then his. Lips melded together, we started walking, our hips bumping into the couch and he lost his balance. He fell backward, half on the couch and half off. Giggles broke free between our kisses and our laughter died off as our hands got more involved. With a skill beyond me, Cam managed to get my jeans off while I sprawled on top of him and then he displayed a whole different kind of talent.

His hands traveled northward, cresting over my breasts, finding the nipples covered by satin. I arched against his hands, biting back a moan as Cam made that sexy sound as his hips pushed up against mine. A rush of heat flooded my core as one hand left my breast and slipped down the curve of my stomach. His hand slid under my panties. He palmed me, rubbing his thumb in just the right place that I cried out. The desire—the need to lose myself in nothing but sensation, even for just a few moments, took over. My skin was on fire as I put my weight on my knees and reached down, unzipping his fly.

“Avery,” Cam groaned, thrusting into my palm.

Upon  hearing my name on his lips, tension built deep inside me. Our bodies rocked together, but still apart. Then the tension was spiraling, breaking apart and shattering. I threw my head back, biting down on my lip. Bliss washed over me.

Cam shifted under me and the next thing I know, he was standing and I was wrapped around him like a little monkey. My body was still trembling when I hit the bed. In a heated daze, I watched him strip. Completely.

My God, he was beautiful.

He hooked his fingers under my panties and I lifted my hips so he could pull them down. It wasn’t the first time that he’d stripped me bare, but it was the first time that we both were so naked. There were different stages of nakedness I’ve learned over the past four months. This was the final stage. My stomach fluttered.

Cam hovered over me, his lips trailing a path across my body. My fingers were in his soft hair as he came back up, claiming my mouth. He shifted above me and I felt him on my thigh.

My heart stuttered and then sped up.

A tremor coursed over his body or maybe it was mine causing his to do that, because I think I was shaking. I didn’t know if it was from excitement or something else. My hands found his chest and they flattened there.

“Do you want this?” he asked, his voice strained as he held himself back. “Yes,” I said, and I told myself that I did. And I did want this. I wanted to cross that final line with Cam.

His eyes met mine for a moment and then he bent his head, kissing me as he lowered his body upon mine. I felt him there, the tip of him slipping through my wetness, and I don’t know what happened. Maybe it was the weight of him on top of me or the feel of him between my thighs. For a frightening second, I wasn’t in my bedroom or under Cam. I was back on the couch, my cheek pressed roughly into the coarse fabric. Cold air rushed over my exposed lower body, followed by a rough, demanding hand. I tried to push the memory out of my head and focus on what was really happening, but once it crept in, I couldn’t get it out of my head.

Every muscle in my body locked up and the knot of unease from earlier in the day returned with a vengeance. It was like being hit with an arctic blast. I went cold on the outside and inside. Panic dug in with razor sharp claws.

I twisted my head to the side, breaking the kiss as I pushed against his chest. “No. Stop. Please stop.”

Cam froze above me, his chest rising and falling deeply. “Avery? What the—?”

“Get off.” My skin was crawling as pressure clamped down on my chest. “Get off. Please. Get off me.”

He rolled off me in an instant, and I scrambled across the bed, grabbing the comforter and tugging it up over me. I shot to my feet, backing up until I hit the dresser. Bottles of lotion rattled. The soft thud of them hitting the floor snapped me out of it. My heart was racing so fast I thought I’d be sick.

“Oh God,” I whispered hoarsely. There was a good chance I was going to hurl the baked pretzel we’d shared earlier.

Light from the hallway cast strange shadows over half of Cam’s pale face. His eyes were as big as the moon. He stared at me, brows pinched with concern. “Did I hurt you? I didn’t—”

“No. No!” I squeezed my eyes shut. “You didn’t hurt me. You didn’t even… I don’t know. I’m sorry…” I trailed off, having no idea what to say.

Cam took several deep breaths, planting his hands on the bed. “Talk to me, Avery. What just happened?”

“Nothing.” My voice cracked. “Nothing happened. I just thought—”

“You thought what?”

I shook my head. “I don’t know. It’s not a big deal—”

“Not a big deal?” His brows flew up. “Avery, you just scared the shit out of me. You started panicking like I was hurting you or—or like I was forcing you to do this.”

Horrified, I felt my stomach drop. “You weren’t forcing me, Cam. I liked what you were doing.”

Several seconds passed and then he said, “You know I would never hurt you, right?”

“Yes.” Tears clogged my throat.

“And I would never force you to do anything you didn’t want to do.” He spoke slowly, each word precise. “You understand that, right? If you’re not ready, I’m okay with that, but you have to talk to me. You have to let me know before it gets to that point.”

Clenching the blanket, I nodded.

There was another gap of silence and his stare pierced mine. A certain level of comprehension flashed across his features, and I bit down on my lip. I wanted to know what he was thinking and then again, I didn’t.

“What are you not telling me?” he asked, like he’d done the night out in the parking lot.

I couldn’t say anything.

His jaw clenched. “What happened to you?”

“Nothing!” The word burst from me like a cannon. “There’s nothing to talk about, dammit. Just fucking drop it.”

“You’re lying.”

There. He said it. He called me on it.

Cam took a deep, long breath. “You’re lying to me. Something happened, because that?” He gestured at where we’d been twined together moments before. “That wasn’t about not being ready. That was about something else, because you know—you know—I would wait for you, Avery. I swear, but you have to tell me what’s going on in your head.”

My chest ached at his words, but I couldn’t say anything.

“I’m begging you, Avery. You’ve got to be up front and honest with me. You said that you trusted me. You’ve got to prove it, because I know there is more to this. I’m not stupid and I’m not blind. I remember how you acted when we first met and I sure as hell remember what you said that night you were drunk.”