Текст книги "Wait for You"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 11 (всего у книги 21 страниц)

“No.” I joined her on the other side, eyeing the loaves of bread, onions, milk, and eggs.

“My daughter usually helps me in the morning,” she said, placing the dishtowel on the counter. “It’s not difficult at all, so you’re more than welcome to help or keep me company.”

“I can help. What can I do.”

Mrs. Hamilton’s smile was wide. “If you could start with the bread, that would be perfect. All you need to do is break them up in this bowl.” She pointed to a large blue one. “When you’ve finished the loaf, we’ll move on to the next step.”

“Okay.” I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and rolled up my sleeves, then washed my hands quickly.

“That’s a pretty bracelet,” she commented as she started chopping the onion into small chunks.

“Thank you.” I tore apart the bread, probably a little harder than necessary. “Cam told me that his sister was at a dance recital?”

“In Pittsburg,” she said, pride pouring into her voice. “It was an invitation only recital. Richard and I would’ve gone, but we wanted to be home for Cameron. Teresa understands though. We rarely miss any of her dances.”

I finished the loaf. “What’s next?”

“Onions, butter, milk, and seasoning. You get to mush it all with your hands.”

I waited for her to dump in the ingredients. As she did so, she told me how much she thought should go in and then I sunk my hands into the gooey mess. Grinning, I laughed. “Okay, this feels kind of weird.”

“It does. At least you’re not eating it.”

“Raw?”

“Yep, Cameron and Teresa both would try to eat it raw.”

I made a face as I smushed everything together so that the milk and butter would evenly distributed through the bread. After wiping my hands clean, I moved onto the second loaf of bread. “I used to dance,” I admitted.

“Cameron mentioned that.”

My hands stilled around the bread. He’d told his parents that? I wasn’t sure what to make of it.

“I would’ve known if he hadn’t said anything,” she commented as she dropped some of the onions in my bowl. “You still move like a dancer.” She smiled. “I danced and watching Teresa over the years, you come to be able to recognize that in others.”

“It’s nice to hear that. I mean, I don’t feel like I still do.”

“You do.”

I was back to the mushing part again and I decided that was my favorite. I was weird.

“You never made stuffing with your mom?” Cam’s mother asked.

It was an innocent question, but it caused a deep ache to slice across my chest. My mom and I hadn’t been the closest two people in the world before the incident, but afterward, our relationship was nonexistent. “I don’t think my mom knows how to cook,” I said finally.

“You don’t think?”

I shook my head. “My parents aren’t into cooking dinners.”

There was a pause. “Cameron said they travel a lot during the holidays?”

“Yeah, and they kind of like doing their own thing, you know, daughter free.” I forced out a laugh, shrugging it off. “I mean, I’m okay with that. I can’t ski to save my life and being stuck on a ship in the middle of an ocean isn’t something I’m into.”

Mrs. Hamilton was silent as we added the last of the ingredients and I dug my fingers into it, liking the way it slid through my fingers. “So what do you normally do when you’re home?” she asked.

I shrugged. “I wouldn’t be by myself the whole time. They have a maid that usually cooks dinner for me before she goes home. It’s really nice of her because she’s not required to work during the holidays.”

“What about Christmas?”

“The same,” I admitted, surprising myself. I glanced up and found her watching me. “It’s not really a big deal. My family isn’t very close and so it’s probably better this way.” After saying that, I figured it probably wasn’t the best thing to say. “Anyway, I’m done. What’s the next step?”

“It goes in the turkey.” She smiled, but it seemed a little off. “Want to do the honors?”

“Sure.” I waited for her to turn the bird around and then I completed the somewhat gross task of getting all in the turkey’s personal space.

When I was done, I headed over to the double sink while she wrapped the turkey in foil and placed it in a roaster.

“Thank you for helping me, Avery.”

“No problem,” I said. “I’m happy to have helped.” And I really was. “It was fun.”

Mrs. Hamilton smiled at me, though her eyes were sad. “Well, honey, you’re always welcomed here for the holidays. There’s never enough hands when it comes to making food.”

I murmured thank you and finished washing my hands. As I turned, I caught sight of Cam standing just outside the kitchen. I had no idea how long he’d been standing there or how much of the conversation he overheard, but the soft look on his sleepy face told me he’d heard enough.

Chapter 19

Anyone with two eyes could tell that Teresa and Cam were close and they really did care about each other. The two of them were insane together, constantly picking on one another and causing general trouble wherever they went.

Teresa was a female version of Cam—tall, strikingly beautiful with raven-colored hair and bright blue eyes. She had the body of well-disciplined dancer and was practically bubbling over with energy.

Much to my relief, Teresa was a sweetheart. I’d been afraid that she wouldn’t like me for some reason or another, but she hugged me.

The Hamilton family were a bunch of hugging folks.

I hung out with them in the basement until Teresa and I went upstairs to help her mom get the sides ready for dinner, which seemed like the perfect moment to get away, because Cam and his father started talking about hunting and my skin was beginning to crawl.

Seeing mother and daughter working together and laughing had a strange effect on me. They were almost like strange creatures to me; the kind of family you saw on evening sitcoms. I was envious of that relationship, but in the same respect I sort of accepted that this would never be my mom and I.

While we got the dinner ready, Teresa was glued to her cell phone, constantly texting someone, which carried over to the dinner table.

“Who do you keep texting?” Cam demanded as he slopped a second heaping of yams on his plate.

Teresa smirked. “That’s none of your business.”

“I’m your brother, it’s my business.”

Uh-oh. I glanced at them and saw Cam’s eyes narrowed on his younger sister as she texted someone.

“Mom, you should tell your daughter it’s rude to text at the table.”

Mrs. Hamilton arched a brow. “It’s not hurting anyone.”

Cam nudged me with his knee under the table, something he’d been doing every five minutes since we sat down. “It’s hurting my soul.”

I rolled my eyes as I knocked him back.

“That’s sad,” his sister commented, dropping her cell in her lap. “So, Avery, how did you end up in West Virginia.”

“I wanted to go some place different,” I said, digging into the mashed potatoes. “My family is originally from Ohio, so West Virginia seemed like a good place to go.”

“I have to be honest, I would’ve picked New York or Florida or Virginia or Maryland or—” Her phone chirped, drawing her attention like someone with ADD and a shiny object. She grabbed her cell and an immediate smile spread across her lips.

Cam knocked my knee as his eyes narrowed even further. He reached for more turkey, but suddenly veered off, snatching the cell from his sister’s fingers.

“Hey!” she shouted. “Give it back!”

Cam stretched into me, avoiding his sister’s flailing arms. He scowled. “Who’s Murphy?”

Mr. Hamilton shook his head.

“It’s none of your business! God,” Teresa snapped. “Give me back my phone.”

“I’ll give it back when you tell me who Murphy is? A boyfriend?”

Her cheeks flushed, and I figured Cam was a bit of the overprotective type. He held the phone away from her until she sat back, crossing her arms. “Mom.”

“Cam, give her back the phone.” When Cam still held it, his mother smiled. “We’ve met Murphy. He’s a really good boy.”

Cam didn’t look convinced, and I suddenly wondered if there was more to this. I looked over at Teresa and her eyes were starting to shine. I turned my attention back to my plate quickly.

“He’s really nice and I like him,” she said in a quiet voice.

Cam snorted. “That’s not a ringing—”

“He’s not Jeremy,” Mr. Hamilton said, suddenly very serious and somber. “Give her back the phone.”

He looked like he was going to hold onto that phone for the rest of his life and where there hadn’t been any tension in the house since I arrived, it was now very much in this room. I reached under the table and grabbed his upper thigh, startling him enough that he loosened his grip on her phone. I swiped it away from him.

“Hey!” His eyes narrowed. “That was so not fair.”

I grinned as I stretched behind him, handing the phone to his sister. “Sorry.”

“Thank you,” Teresa said, and I was sure I made a friend for life with that move.

Cam’s look said there’d be payback later before he turned to his sister. “I want to meet this Murphy.”

Teresa let out a loud sigh. “Okay. Let me know when.”

Shock flickered through me. I would not have expected her to relent that easily to his demand. My gaze shifted between them two and while Cam seemed to relax, there was a tension in his jaw that hadn’t been there before. Conversation picked back up, but there seemed to be something simmering behind it.

Or it could just be my paranoia.

After the feast, Cam and I were alone in the dining room, stacking the dishes. “Is everything okay with your sister?” I asked.

Cam laughed, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Everything is kosher. Let’s play,” he said, catching my hands and pulling me toward the stairs leading to the basement. “I bet you can beat me at pool.”

“I don’t know about that.” But I let him led me away.

“Oh, I suck ass at pool.”

I laughed. “What about the dishes and—”

Cam stopped without any warning, causing me to crash into his chest. His hands fell to my hips as he lowered his forehead to mine. “Forget the dishes. Come play with me, sweetheart.”

Crap. He had me a sweetheart.

#

I’d just changed into my pajamas and slid my legs under the covers when there was a soft knock on the bedroom door. I rose onto my elbows. My heart jumped as Cam opened the door halfway.

“Hey,” he said, a slight grin on his face.

“Hi.” The one word came out a half whisper, half croak.

That lopsided grin spread an inch. “I wanted to say goodnight.”

A flutter took up residency deep inside my chest and my lower stomach. My hand clenched the edge of the down comforter. “You already told me goodnight.”

“I did.” He stepped into the room and my gaze slipped down the length of him. Cam made a gray shirt and flannel pajama bottoms look good. “But I didn’t. Not in the way I want to say goodnight.”

Oh dear sweet mercy me…

Cam quietly shut the door behind him. The click of the latch catching caused my heart to pound with him being in here, while I was in bed in nothing more than a thin, long sleeve shirt and cotton shorts. That was all.

I held my breath as I watched him make his way to the bed. He sat beside me, his hip resting against my leg. In the dim light of the room, his eyes shone like dark jewels as they moved over my face and down, to my chest. Under his intense gaze, my nipples immediately puckered against my shirt.

His gaze flicked up to my face, and I sucked in a soft breath. The nest of butterflies were back in my stomach, trying to make their way out. “I’m glad you decided to come here,” he said, voice gruff.

I shivered. “I am, too.”

“Really?” Cam planted a hand on the other side of my hip. “Did you just admit that?”

“Yeah, I sort of did.”

He leaned in so that his upper body hovered over mine. “I wish I had my phone to record this moment.”

My gaze dipped to his mouth. A witty retort slipped out of my grasp. I wetted my lower lip and his parted. My chest rose sharply as I forced my eyes up to meet his. “I’ve… had a wonderful time.”

“So have I.” The look in his eyes softened just a bit, but there was still a heated edge to his stare. “So what do you think you’re going to do for winter break?”

Knowing that he’d overheard the conversation I had with his mom, I didn’t lie. “I don’t know. I thought about taking off for D.C. one of the days. I want to see the Smithsonian and the National Mall. I’ve never been.”

“Hmm, that could be fun. I could be your tour guide.”

A small grin pulled at my lips. “That… that would be fun.”

“It would be,” he said, his voice warm on my cheek. “Pick a date.”

“Now?”

“Now.”

“January the second,” I said immediately, and then flushed. “Will you be available then?”

“I’ll be available whenever you want me to be.”

That delighted me to no end and my grin spread.

“Guess what, Avery?”

“What?” I wondered if he could see how fast my heart was beating beneath my shirt.

“Remember how you just said you were having a good time?” Cam lowered his head so that our mouths were scant inches apart. “It’s about to get better.”

“Is it?”

He shifted his head and his nose grazed mine. “Oh, yeah.”

“Are you not going to kiss me again?”

His lips tipped up. “That’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

Warmth slid through my veins as my body tensed in a welcomed, delicious way. My eyes fluttered shut as his lips brushed mine once and then twice, as if he was getting reacquainted with the feel of them. The slight, barely there touch was nerve racking.

Cam shifted his weight onto his left arm and with his other hand, he spread his fingers along my cheek. He placed a kiss to the corner of my lips and the other side before sliding his hand back around the nape of my neck. His lips moved along my jaw, trailing a fiery path to my ear. A shiver danced along my skin, eliciting a deep, husky chuckle from him. His lips pressed against the sensitive spot under my ear, and a moan crawled up my throat.

“Goodnight, Avery.”

And then he kissed me—kissed me like he’d had right before he’d left the night of our date. Kissed me like he was a man starving for oxygen and I was the only air he needed to breathe. The hand around my neck held me there, raised up on my elbows as his mouth devoured mine. And that was the only word I could use to accurately explained how he kissed me.

Cam devoured me.

My lips opened, needing almost no coaxing, and his tongue slipped in, teasing mine as his hand tightened behind my neck. He tasted like toothpaste and it had my senses spinning. A sound rumbled from deep inside his chest as he pushed back, sliding his hand out from under me.

The moment my head hit the pillow, a tiny burst of panic kicked the air out of my lungs. Where was this heading? I thought about his sister being down the hall and his parents sleeping on the floor above, but then he kissed me again, a sweet tender kiss as he cupped my cheek. The panic eased off, the thoughts slipped away.

Cam hovered above me and I wanted to feel him on me, our bodies pressed together. Once that need took root, warring emotions rose inside me. Was this too much? Not enough? He caught my lower lip between his teeth, and a moan escaped me.

I was going to go with not enough.

In an act of supreme bravery fueled by desire, I reached down and slid my hands under the hem of his shirt. Cam jerked as my fingers grazed his bare, taut skin. He stilled for a moment and then he pulled away. I almost demanded to know why, because I’d come this far to actually touch him and he was leaving me? What in the holy hell was up with that?

Cam reached down and pulled his shirt off, over his head.

Oh.

Oh.

My breath hitched as I soaked him in. Cam’s body was gorgeous. All smooth, tight skin stretched over rock hard muscle. I wanted to ask about the tattoo and if it symbolized something to him, but couldn’t force the words from my mouth.

He yanked the comforter down, and my heart jumped. Immediately, I thought about what I had done in the bed. Our gazes locked and I couldn’t move or breathe. He climbed over me, his arms caging me in, surrounding me in a way that made me feel small… and safe. My hands went to his stomach, flattening against his skin. The muscles of his abs spasmed.

Cam dropped his forehead to mine. “You have no idea what you do to me.”

I didn’t, but as he lowered himself onto me, I started to get a good idea. I could feel him against my stomach, through our clothes, hard and thick. I thought that would pull me out of the heady haze of desire, but it didn’t. Heat flared between my thighs, my pulse pounded throughout my body. I shifted under him, bringing him closer to where I ached for him.

“Fuck,” he growled, his large body shaking.

He captured my lips in a searing kiss as he settled between my legs, muffling the pleasant groan that had worked its way up my throat. His hips rolled into mine, and my nerve endings were suddenly on fire. The thin material of my pajamas were nothing between the hard, hot skin of his chest and mine. His hips made another slow thrust that had my toes curling as I gripped his sides. His kiss turned deeper, more urgent as he slid his hand from my cheek, down my neck. His hand brushed the swell of my breast, so close to the sensitive bud before following the curve of my stomach to the flare of my hips. He curved his hand around my thigh, lifting my leg around his hip. He settled deeper, pressing against my sex in a way that thrilled me at the same time it stirred a conflicting emotion. When his hips rocked again, I whimpered against his lips.

“I like that sound,” he said, moving his hips. I made it again, flushing. “Correction. I love that fucking sound.”

Sensations raced across my skin, building into an ache in my core. It was like the night in my bed but much stronger, more intense and so very real. His hand was on the move again, trailing up my side, jumping to my hand. His fingers tangled with mine for a second and then drifted up, under my sleeves as his tongue danced with mine.

Suddenly, he stilled above me and lifted his head. I forced my eyes open as I dragged in a deep breath. The look on his face; I didn’t understand it.

“Cam?”

Without saying a word, he lifted my arm and turned it over. My heart dropped. No. No. It was like slow motion. His fingers moved, thumb sliding over the length of the deep scar that cut across my vein.

He looked.

I followed his gaze.

Disbelief exploded, suffocating all the wonderful feelings that had been building in me. His thumb moved again, as if he was trying to wipe the scar away and then when it remained, he shifted his gaze to mine. There was no mistaking it. He knew—he knew what the scar was.

“Avery…?” he whispered, brows furrowed and face taut. “Oh, Avery, what is this?”

Horror swept the disbelief away, like a rolling tide. The pained expression etched into his striking face reached down into me, sinking deep with razor sharp claws and tore me apart. The look on his face, it… it destroyed me in a way nothing else could since that night on Halloween.

The scar—I never wanted anyone to ever see it, to witness just how weak I’d been once upon a time. It went beyond humiliation.

Tearing my arm free, I scrambled out from underneath him. My body flashed between hot and cold as I yanked the sleeve down over my bare wrist.

“Avery…” He reached for me.

“Please,” I said, pushing myself to the edge of the bed. “Please leave.”

Cam pulled his hand back. “Avery, talk to me.”

I shook my head, lip trembling.

A muscle worked in his jaw. “Avery—”

“Leave!” I jumped from the bed, stumbling back a step. “Just leave.”

Cam froze for a second, as if he was about to say something else, but then he pushed off the bed. He backed toward the door as a deep shudder started working its way through my body. With his hand on the door knob, he stopped.

“Avery, we can talk—”

“Leave.” My voice broke. “Please.”

His shoulders stiffened and then he did as I asked. Cam left, closing the door quietly behind him.

Chapter 20

I didn’t go to astronomy class on Monday or Tuesday. I just couldn’t bring myself to face Cam. Not after I’d seen the look on his face when he realized what the scar on my wrist was from. Not after having to pretend like everything was okay in front of his mom and dad before we left. Even though I’d only known them for a short period, I thought they were wonderful and hated the fact that I was leaving knowing the likelihood of ever seeing them again was low. Not after the tense, never-ending ride home Friday morning or when Cam had followed me up to my apartment and tried to talk to me.

And definitely not after he tried to come over Sunday morning with eggs and I didn’t answer the door.

I spent most of the weekend in bed, my eyes aching so badly from the nonstop sob-fest that I didn’t think was truly over. I’d avoided my phone. Brit texted. Jacob texted.

Cam had texted.

Cam had also tried to stop by Sunday night, Monday night and Tuesday night. Every time he did it was like a punch to the stomach.

I just couldn’t face him, because that look on his face had been as bad as the one on my mother’s.

It had been around five months after the Halloween party when I had decided I couldn’t take it anymore. The onslaught of emails, texts, phone calls, and Facebook messages had been bad, but at school, in real life? In the hallways, the bathrooms, the cafeteria, and the classrooms, people didn’t just whisper about what they heard happened when Blaine and I went into his bedroom. They openly talked about it in front of me. Called me every combination of lying whore you could come up with. The teachers didn’t stop it, neither did the staff.

So me and that picture frame that used to hold the photo of me and my best friend—the same girl who’d called me a slut that very day in the crowded hall at school—had gotten friendly.

My parents could barely look at me before I cut my wrist but after? In the hospital room, Mom had lost it. For the first time in, like forever, she had lost it.

She had stormed into the private room, Dad trailing behind her. Her sharp gaze shot from my face to my bandaged wrist.

Stricken panic had crossed her too perfect features, and I thought that finally, she was going to pull me into her arms and tell me that everything was going to be okay, that we’d get through this together.

That look of pain had given way to disappointment, to pity, and to anger.

“How dare you shame yourself and your family like this, Avery. What am I supposed to tell people when they find out about this?” Mom had said and her voice had shook as she struggled to keep quiet in the hospital room, but she lost control. The next words were shrieked. “After everything else, you go and do this? Haven’t you put us through enough? What is wrong with you, Avery? What is God’s name is wrong with you?”

The nurses had dragged Mom out of the room.

Strangely, what I remembered from that night had been that brief look of panic on her face and how I had mistakenly believed it had been there out of concern for me.

That stricken look had been on Cam’s face, and I wanted to be somebody else, because I knew that stricken look would eventually turn into something else, into disappointment, into pity, and into anger.

And I couldn’t bear to see that happen with Cam.

I would do anything to avoid that, even if it meant taking drastic steps. Somewhere between Tuesday night and Wednesday morning, I’d made up my mind about the current state of my life.

This… this stuff with Cam had been doomed for failure from the beginning. Could a guy and a girl who were attracted to each other really be friends? I didn’t think so. Things would get too complicated. They’d either act on those feelings or stay away from each other. We had tried to act on those feelings for a hot second. We kissed a couple of times. That was all. And in reality, it wouldn’t have gone further.

I wasn’t sure that I could’ve gone further. Well, especially now I didn’t think so. Cam would eventually move on and I would have an absolutely obliterated heart. Not broken, but completely destroyed, because Cam… he was falling-in-love-with material. And I couldn’t let that happened.

Maybe you already had, whispered an evil, terrible, bitchy voice.

So on Wednesday morning I went to my advisor and made up some excuse about there being too much school work and that I was getting behind. The last day for complete withdrawal from a class had been at the end of October, so to get out of astronomy I would have to take an incomplete.

An incomplete would totally bitch slap my GPA, but the truth was I was doing good enough in the rest of my classes that it wouldn’t kill my overall.

There was a decision to make.

Face Cam and deal with the inevitable broken heart or take the incomplete.

I took the incomplete.

And as I left my advisor’s office, I knew what I’d done wasn’t so much making a decision. I was running. After all, wasn’t that what I was good at? Running?

#

Brit and Jacob attempted to stage an intervention the following weekend. Both showed up at my apartment and if I hadn’t let them in, I was confident they’d beat down my door, or worse, involve Cam.

I sat in my moon chair, staring up at them. “Guys, really…?”

Brit folded her arms, chin raised stubbornly. “We are your friends and obviously you’re facing a crisis of some sort, so we are here, and you can’t get rid of us that easily.”

“I’m not having or facing a crisis.” God, had Cam told them what he’d seen? My stomach dropped, but I told myself he wouldn’t have done that. At least I didn’t think so.

“Really?” Jacob said, returning from the kitchen. “Since you’ve come back from Thanksgiving break, you’ve been walking around like a zombie and not the cool, fast brain-eating kind. You looked like you’ve been crying your eyes out, you’ve been avoiding Cam and all talk of him, and there is nothing good to eat in your kitchen.”

I raised my brow at the last statement. “I haven’t been avoiding Cam.”

“Bullshit,” Brit replied. “I talked to Cam yesterday. He said you won’t talk to him, answer his phone calls or your door when it’s him, and you haven’t been to astronomy.”

A sharp pain sliced across my chest. I almost asked if she had approached him, but figured it didn’t matter. The less I thought about him the better. Not saying his name helped.

Having my two friends give me the third degree about him wasn’t helping.

“Did you guys get into a fight?” Jacob plopped down on the couch.

Had we? Not really. I shook my head. “It’s nothing, guys. We didn’t get in a fight. I just haven’t been in the mood to talk to him.”

She shot me a bland look. “Avery, that’s bullshit, too.”

I raised my hands helplessly.

“Why haven’t you been going to astronomy?” she asked.

“I dropped the class.”

She gaped. “You’ve dropped the class? Avery, the last day to drop was—oh, my God, you’re taking an incomplete?”

“It’s not a big deal.”

Brit stared at me, so did Jacob. “Have you’ve lost your fucking mind, Avery?”

I winced. “No.”

Taking a deep breath, Brit glanced between Jacob and me. “Jacob, can you get back to the dorm by yourself?”

His brows knitted. “Uh yeah, it’s not that far of a walk, but—”

“Good,” she chirped. Leaning forward, she kissed him on the cheek. “See you later.”

Jacob sat there for a moment and then shook his head. He gave me a quick hug before he left. “Why did you kick him out?” I asked.

“Because we need to talk girl to girl,” she replied.

Oh dear.

She leaned forward, clenching her knees. “What happened between you two?”

I struggled to come up with a good excuse for why I was avoiding Cam. “It’s just that I don’t think pursuing a relationship with him is the right thing?”

“Okay. You’re entitled to decide that, but no friendship? To the point you can’t be in the same class as him?”

“We can’t be friends,” I said after a few moments, already weary with this conversation. “That’s just it, okay? I really don’t want to talk about this. I’m not trying to be rude, but there’s nothing to say. I don’t want to see him. End of story.”

I don’t want to see him. The thing about that was that it was only partially true. I was too embarrassed and ashamed to see him, but I missed him. It had only been a week, but I missed his smart ass comments, his wit and charm, and—I stopped myself with a shake of my head.

Brit pushed her hair off her forehead. “Alright, but I want to ask one question and I want a fucking honest answer, okay?”

My eyes widened. “Okay.”

“Did he try something?”

“What?” I shrieked.

She met my stare. “Did he hurt you or something?”

“Oh, my God, no.” I stood, running my hands down my hips. “Cam didn’t do anything. I promise you. He didn’t do anything wrong. It’s me. Okay. Please don’t think that about him.”

Brit nodded slowly.  “I didn’t think he would’ve, but I had to ask. I had to know.”

She stayed for a little while longer, switching the conversation to her latest hook up with Jimmie, and for a while I forgot about Cam and the whole mess.

When she left, she stopped at the door and turned back to me. “Just in case you’re wondering, when I talked to Cam, he was really worried about you. He was upset. Whatever went down between you two, I hope you guys can work it out, because…”

“Because what?”

She pressed her lips together, exhaling through her nose. “Because I think the guy really does care about you, Avery. And I think you really care about him. It would be a fucking shame if you guys couldn’t fix this or work this out over some bullshit.”

#

With the semester winding down, I threw myself into finals. With the incomplete in astronomy, I needed to ace all my exams to just to make myself feel somewhat better after making such a crazy decision. More than once over the last week or so, I wanted to punt kick myself in the face for taking an incomplete. In those very rare logical moments, I cursed myself every which way from Sunday. It was a stupid, stupid decision, especially over a boy, but there was nothing I could do now. I’d missed the last two weeks of class and there was no way I could make up for that.

As I finished up my last final of the semester—music—I headed to the train station where my car was parked. Facing the brutal wind that seemed to blow straight in my eyes, I pulled out my cell. There were a couple of unread texts from Cam over the last week, one from the UNKNOWN CALLER who apparently got tired of calling me a whore over voicemail and moved on to texting it. Just like I avoided my cousin’s emails, I did the same with Cam’s texts.