Текст книги "Dirty English"

Автор книги: Ilsa Madden-Mills

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Текущая страница: 5 (всего у книги 19 страниц)

TWO DAYS AFTER the party, I drove a few miles down the road to meet my mom at a truck stop off the interstate.

I hadn’t seen her in nearly four months, and we only lived three hours apart.

The diner smelled like old grease and deep-fried onion rings, reminding me of my childhood when my mom would bring home takeout from the restaurant where she waited tables.

She waved at me from a red booth at the back.

I walked her way, feeling anxious.

Some people think God puts difficult people in our lives for a reason, to make us better people as we sharpen ourselves on the knife of their shortcomings. That was my mom. She’d destroyed my trust a million times as a child, and eventually I’d learned to stop counting on her. My kindergarten graduation, my first middle school dance, the day I got my acceptance letter to Oakmont Prep, the night with Colby … she’d been gone, off on an adventure with whomever she was seeing. Like a stray dog that whines for scraps, I’d been begging my mom to love me my whole life.

Yet out of my shitty childhood, a strong drive had been forged in my heart.

To be more.

More than the trailer I’d grown up in; more than my alcoholic mother and absent father.

Today she’d put extra effort in, hot-rolling her natural blond hair in big waves and pulling it back with a bejeweled butterfly clip. She wore a pink gingham sundress and her lips were painted a glossy pink. At thirty-nine, she still managed to look farm fresh.

She jumped up to greet me, a bright smile on her face.

“You’re too skinny,” I commented as she gathered me up in a hug, my hands feeling the bones of her spine poking through.

We pulled back, and I studied her face more closely, taking in the hollowed neckline. A tingle of foreboding went over me. It had been a year since her last rehab for alcohol and drugs, and I’d held out hope she’d last longer this time. “You clean?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Elizabeth, I’m fine. Right as rain.” She laughed at my frown. “Don’t worry. I can take care of myself.”

We sat down together.

Her eyes gleamed with a happiness I hadn’t seen in a long time. “I can’t wait for you to meet my new boyfriend, Elizabeth. He’s in the restroom right now, but he’s got real class and is the sexiest man I’ve ever dated.” She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I know I’ve said that before, but I mean it this time.” She squirmed in the booth, excitement written on her face. “He’s even going to take me on a one of those cruises to Mexico soon.”

“Fun.” I smiled through my disappointment. I’d thought it would just be us today. “Is he employed?”

She nodded. “And he has dental. What else could I ask for?”

“A washing machine maybe, or I don’t know, a home to live in?”

She’d sold her trailer a year ago and had been bouncing back and forth between boyfriends’ and friends’ houses.

An older man sauntered out of the restroom area in a flowery print Tommy Bahama–type shirt unbuttoned a quarter of the way down, wiry chest hairs poking out like crazy. He was so abundantly hairy I wouldn’t have been surprised if a small monkey lived inside his shirt and was reaching up to say hi.

Balding but hiding it with a greasy combover, he walked toward us, his eyes raking over me, lingering. Long muttonchops came down each side of his face.

My whole body went on high creep alert.

He stopped at our table and his eyes bounced back to my mother. “Yo, baby, you didn’t say she was a looker like her mama. Guess I hit the jackpot today. Now, who do I sit next to?” He let out a belly laugh.

I stiffened.

But this is your mother, I told myself. Be respectful. Give her a chance.

She laughed and blushed. “Stop flirting and sit down and meet my daughter.”

He slid in next to her, and my eyes went back and forth between them.

I’d seen a myriad of men come in and out of our trailer growing up. A few had been decent to me, but she’d never wanted those. Nope. Most had been grade-A assholes, and she’d loved them the most. In my teens—and after a particularly bad episode where I’d found a hidden video camera in my bedroom—I’d managed to avoid a lot of them by staying at Shelley’s most nights.

“Didn’t know you were bringing your boyfriend,” I said, not able to hold back.

“Now don’t be that way, Elizabeth. This is Karl.” She preened at me expectantly. “He owns a used car dealership in Rockport and even gave me a new Impala for my birthday.” She pointed out to the parking lot. “Look, there it is. It’s even got leather interior.”

“Hmm.” I was still reserving judgment.

“Hell yeah, I did, ’cause this hot piece sure does know how to treat a man right.” Sure was shore and right was riiaght, the county twang heavily pronounced, his words elongated.

He leaned in and they kissed each other with visible tongue.

“Nice,” I muttered.

The waitress showed up to take my order, and they separated, Mom straightening her blouse and Karl wiping his mouth and leering at me.

He placed hairy arms on the table. “So you one of those smart girls? I heard you got yourself a scholarship to Whitman with a free ride?”

I nodded. Warily. “Yes, but I get financial aid to pay for living expenses. I work too,” I added.

“Good for you, but these are bad economic times we’re living in. Gotta make a buck where you can.” He took a sip of coffee, eyes skating over me. “Maybe you need to get yourself a sugar daddy like your mama here.”

“I’m fine just the way I am, thank you.” My fists clenched under the table.

It was decided. Karl fell in the asshole category.

They had ordered before I came, and I watched him chew his eggs nosily, wiping his mouth on a napkin as he finished. “Well, if you ever need anything—like a new car or a loan, I can take care of ya. Any girl as pretty as you who’s related to the love of my life, well, I wanna do good by. Maybe adopt you after I marry your mama.” He nodded emphatically as if I had no other option but to agree.

My eyes flared. “You’re getting married?”

She shrugged, her thin shoulders making me wince.

I looked only at her. “You think that’s a good idea?”

Karl stiffened. “Of course it is. That’s what you do when you fall in love.”

The waitress finally set down a coffee for me, and I busied myself drinking it.

How long did I have to stay here?

I powered on. “So how did you guys meet?”

Mom leaned in over the table, eyes glowing. “It was fate, Elizabeth. I was at Club Raven, you know the one out on Highway 89 where all the locals go?”

I nodded. It was her favorite honky-tonk.

“So in walks this big hunk of a man here and from out of nowhere, someone played Journey’s ‘Faithfully’ on the jukebox and bam! His eyes met mine and when he came over to ask me to dance, I nearly fell off the barstool. He bought me a slew of drinks and we laughed and played pool all night.” She sighed, hooking her arm through his as she gazed into his eyes. “It was love at first sight.”

“What an epic romance. Sounds like a movie … maybe even a country song.”

I didn’t say a good movie, but I really did try to keep the sarcasm out of my tone.

Karl took a sip of coffee. “So, your mama and I have been talking about how to get some real cash, you know, to start our marriage off right, maybe buy us a big house and later expand my car dealership.”

“Yeah?” I didn’t see how this related to me.

He cleared his throat. “So we thought you might help us.”

“Me?” I was dirt poor.

“Yeah, she told me about you and Senator Scott’s son back in high school. How he took advantage of your good nature and all. And well, one thing led to another and we came up with a plan.”

The entire room spun and I wanted to vomit. I heaved in deep breaths and clutched the table, fighting the panic. Why had she told him?

She shushed him by flapping her hands at his shoulders. “I told you to let me bring that up. She’s sensitive.”

I wanted to crawl under the table. “What gives you the right to discuss my personal life?” My voice was sharp, my wrists itching.

She pouted. “Baby, it’s water under the bridge now, right? In the past. You’re over him. Why look at you. You’re a big time college girl now. You’ve left all that behind.”

Left it behind?

He’d ripped my heart out and sent it through a wood chipper.

I’d never be over that night.

“You can’t let him get away with it,” Mom insisted. “Something should be done about what happened to you.”

What?

I shook my head. Emphatically. My nails dug into the seat, trying to hold it together in a public place when what I really wanted to do was run away screaming. I didn’t want to think, talk, look at, or dwell on Colby Scott ever again.

“What does this all have to do with me?”

Mom lowered her voice. “In case you didn’t know, it’s an election year for Senator Scott.”

Karl leaned in. “So, if we play this right, we can all come out ahead.” A glint grew in his eyes. “We just tell your story to dear old dad and claim we have evidence against his son. He’ll give us money to shut up about it, and we’ll all be richer.”

They wanted to blackmail the Scotts.

They wanted to dredge up the past and air it all out for everyone to see.

They wanted everyone to be reminded of what a slut I was.

Never.

“You deserve retribution. Don’t you want to make him pay?” Mom said.

Make him pay? A strangled laugh came out.

Revenge is hard when the person I blamed the most was myself.

Revenge is even harder when the person you despise is at the top of the food chain and you’re a bottom feeder.

“No, I don’t,” I snapped louder than I’d intended, causing a nearby table to glance our way.

I didn’t care.

I slapped my hand on the table. “The Scott family has run Petal and this state for generations. They control the police, judges, everyone. You can’t do this. It’s the most stupid thing I’ve ever heard, and I refuse to help you.”

A few beats of silence went by.

Karl held his hands up. “It was just an idea. That’s all. If you say no, then I guess we don’t have a leg to stand on. We can’t exactly say we know what happened when you aren’t willing to tell your side of the story.”

“Never in a million years. Don’t ever bring it up to me again. Got it?” I felt the muscles in my jaw clenching.

Mom let out a brittle laugh. “Let’s have some pie. Okay? That will make it better.”

Karl just stared at me. I stared back.

I jerked up from the table and looked at Mom. “I’m done. I came here hoping, I don’t know, that we could be a real mother and daughter for once—but I guess not.” I opened my purse, pulled out a ten, and dropped it on the table. “This is for mine. I trust you can get your own?”

Her lips compressed. “Elizabeth Nicole Bennett, you will not walk away from me. I gave birth to you and I deserve some respect. So does Karl. He drove me here to see you.”

I shook my head, feeling the last vestiges of my control slipping away as my voice grew louder. “You don’t get it, Mom. You weren’t even there the day I came home from the hotel. You were in Vegas. You didn’t see how broken I was.”

She paled. “I got there as soon as I could, baby girl. I was trying to get a dancer’s job, to get ahead and make a better life for us both. You know I could have been great if I hadn’t gotten pregnant and then your dad …” Her voice broke.

I turned to go, but she grabbed my wrist. “Wait, don’t be mad at me, Elizabeth, for trying to make us a better life. Just think about what we said … okay?”

No!

I pulled away from her and pivoted, my nose crashing into a warm chest.

Strong hands clasped my shoulders, and I tilted my head up, up … straight into a pair of stormy gray eyes.

COOKIE’S KITCHEN WAS a dump but homey. It was mostly a stopping place for truckers off the interstate, but it was where Max liked to meet and talk shop, mostly about the underground fighting.

We strolled in the double glass doors.

Arlene sashayed over to us in a pink waitress outfit with a white apron. “My Brits are back,” she said with a smile. “Been missin’ you boys.” She nudged her head toward the back. “Max’s next to the window. He’s waitin’ for ya.”

“Thanks, love,” Dax said as he swooped down and picked her up in a bear hug and kissed her on the cheek. She blushed and popped him with a dishrag.

He watched the sashay of her hips back into the kitchen. “There’s not a woman alive who doesn’t want me. I think I’m going to change my name to Sex Lord.”

I snorted. “Yeah, that’s a real turn on.”

“Jealous?” he asked.

“Extremely.”

He grinned. “Don’t be. Not everyone can be as wonderful as me. You got your fists, I got my sexing abilities—which in my opinion is a hell of a lot better. Make love not war, bro.”

“That so?” I chuckled.

Max caught my eye and waved us over. He was in his late forties with thinning hair and a trim physique, and I’d met him at one of the local gyms where we’d both taught classes. Over the past three years, we’d grown close, and hiring him to work at my own place had been the next natural step.

We ordered and talked about the gym and the updates. If all went well with the renovations, then Front Street would be ready for business by January. We’d have a soft opening at first and then a grand opening party in February. The flat at the back would be finished a bit later, perhaps in June, since my first priority was to get the doors open for business.

“What’s new with Nick? You got anything?” I asked a bit later. Nick was the guy who ran the underground fights in North Carolina.

“Yeah. I’ve got some small fights lined up in the next few weeks for you, but Nick wants to schedule a big one for Halloween. He’s got a warehouse lined up as the venue with heavy spenders coming, not just college kids.” He slapped down a portfolio and then slid it over to me with two fingers. “Don’t be afraid to say no.”

Dax shifted in closer, peering down to take in the photos of a blond behemoth posing next to a makeshift octagon. “Bugger.”

Max rubbed his whiskers. “They call him Yeti. He played linebacker for UNC Charlotte but got kicked off for hazing freshmen players. Third strike.”

“Nice lad,” Dax murmured.

I studied him analytically. “It takes more than bulk to beat me. He needs skill. What’s his record?”

“Three knockouts and one tapped out.” Max sent me a rueful look. “Don’t be fooled by the football. He’s been working with a mixed martial arts trainer, hoping to hitch a ride to the UFC. He’s not like these pansy boys you’ve been grappling with on the weekend. He’s serious.”

“Style?” I asked.

Max grimaced. “Signature move is a guillotine choke until you black out. If you don’t, he pounds your face till you do.”

Nice.

“What’s the purse?”

“Two thousand if you lose,” he said.

“I won’t lose.” I couldn’t.

He grinned at my confident manner. “If you win, you get twenty-five percent of the purse, not to exceed fifteen grand. And bragging rights, of course.”

Fuck. That was the most I’d ever fought for.

“Take a look at this.” He pulled out his phone and handed over a YouTube video of Yeti and another man. “The guy he’s fighting is Lorenzo, a Cuban from Miami. Tried to go pro in boxing but opted out to make some fast cash first. Yeti nearly killed him a month ago.”

We watched the blond monster tear the Cuban apart in less than five minutes using his Thor-sized fists to pound him into the pavement.

Dax shook his head. “No way. He’s bigger than you and you’re a giant. Let me give you any extra money you need. I have my half of Mum’s inheritance.”

I shook my head. We’d already had this conversation. “That’s yours, and if Father found out, he’d disown you. You don’t want to piss him off anymore.”

It’s funny, but Dax had cleaved to the new family while I hadn’t. He adored Clara and Blythe, and losing family after Mum would kill Dax.

I rubbed my hands across a coffee stain on the table and stared down at the video.

Raised voices came from a booth in the back of the restaurant and we turned to stare.

A blond girl stood up from the booth, her shoulders stiff, hands clenched at her side.

Elizabeth.

What the hell? I squinted, taking in her companions.

Dax’s eyes followed mine and then came back to me as I rose up from the table.

“You’re going over there?” he asked. “Why?”

“Because she looks like she needs help—and I happen to like her.”

He cocked an eyebrow. “You just met her.”

I ignored that.

He shrugged. “Fine, I’m not missing this.” He made as if to stand, but I pushed him back down.

“You stay here. If we both show up, it looks pushy. Give her some space. Plus, she’s probably still angry with you.”

He held his hands up. “Alright, I can take a hint when I’m not wanted. I’ll chill and watch from across the room.”

“Who is she?” Max asked.

“A girl we met at one of the frat parties,” Dax answered, his eyes scrutinizing me oddly, as if he were trying to suss me out. “Declan seems to have a crush on her.”

“Fuck you.”

He chuckled. “I don’t blame you. I do too.”

Max grunted. “Huh. Well, anyone’s better than Nadia. I never liked that girl. All she wanted was to ride your coattails.”

Dax’s eyes shifted over to Elizabeth. “You better hurry if you want to talk to her. She’s about to bolt.”

I ate up the distance between our tables. She turned, her face planting itself in my chest, her body flush against mine.

Heat ran through me, my groin tightening at the contact. Since the night in my flat, she’d weighed on my mind. Mostly with visions of me pounding into her. Against my wall. On the kitchen table. On the floor.

“Whoa,” I said, taking her shoulders to steady her. “You okay?”

She peered up at me, and my fingers itched to smooth out the worry lines I saw on her face. “Declan? What are you doing here?”

“Just having breakfast. Small world, huh?” I smiled down, resisting the urge to question her about the shadows in her blue eyes. She nodded, still visibly upset, as I stared over her shoulder at the table she’d left behind. A woman who resembled Elizabeth gaped at us while the man’s eyes narrowed in on me.

I glanced back down at her and spoke softly. “Do I need to kick anyone’s arse?”

“No,” she said, a look of desperation flickering across her face. “Just get me out of here before I say something I’ll regret.”

I didn’t even pause. Whatever she needed right at that moment, I wanted to give it to her. I took her hand and led her through the maze of the restaurant, sending a wave to Dax and Max as we passed their table.

Elizabeth didn’t even see them there.

We went out the doors, and she came to a halt in the carpark as she looked around in a daze. Her shoulders hunched in on themselves and she let out a frustrated sound, her hands digging through her purse. “God, I’m so frazzled I don’t even remember where I parked.”

I wanted to march back into that diner and find out exactly what had happened.

“What’s going on? Who were those people?” The lady had to be her mum, but I wasn’t so sure about the man.

She inhaled at my question and turned away from me, as if she didn’t want to face me. “I appreciate you coming over to help, but I—I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You’re hurting, Elizabeth. Sometimes, it helps to talk.” Shit, I didn’t know what else to say. I felt like a blundering wanker. But I wanted to make her feel better.

“You want me to talk? I’ll talk. I’ll tell you that my whole life is ruined and some days it’s all I can do to remember the girl I used to be. I’ve never had much, but two years ago I lost everything. My innocence, my creativity, then my Granny, everything.” Her voice trembled, rippling with pain. “And you’d think she’d understand, but no, I’m always the one reaching out and begging her—my mother—to just see me. She wanted to abort me. She doesn’t think I know that, but I overheard her telling Granny once.” She covered her face. “God, I shouldn’t be telling you this stuff. It doesn’t even make sense to you.”

I picked up her hand and took the keys she’d clasped in her fist. “Come on. I’ll drive you home. You shouldn’t be alone.”

She sniffed, and I braced myself for tears that never came, and frankly, I wasn’t surprised. She might be vulnerable, but I sensed the steel underneath.

She sighed and gave me a curious look. “What about your car?”

“I came with Dax. He can drive by himself.” I would send him a text before we left.

I waited anxiously while she decided.

She sighed and sent me a wry half-smile. “Thank you. I’m glad you were here today. You always seem to be right where I need you.”

I nodded and scanned the carpark until I found her white Camry. We walked over to it, and I opened the passenger door for her. Her blue eyes roved over my face as I buckled her in, our arms brushing. Sparks.

This girl. Her. What was it about her that had me twisted up in knots?

Since the moment she’d walked in that party, I hadn’t been able to get her off my mind.

Shit. But she was all wrong for me. I mean, she was skittish as a colt. How in the hell would she ever fit in my world?

She won’t, the cynic in me said.

“Why are you so nice to me?” she said suddenly as I set her purse at her feet. Her eyes searched mine. She continued. “I mean, I made a fool of myself at your party, then I came in your apartment and hit on you and then pushed you away right when things got heavy …” She swallowed and gazed out the window. “I’m sorry. I’m a real bitch.”

I exhaled and bent down on my knees next to her seat. We stared at each other.

Breathlessness mixed with exhilaration hit me, as if I were about to take a dive off a cliff straight into an ocean below. I pushed a strand of hair out of her eyes. “I’m nice to you because you’re worth it, Elizabeth.”