Текст книги "Alien in the Family"

Автор книги: Gini Koch

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CHAPTER 52

TITO AND I LOOKED AT EACH OTHER. “Grab a staff, not that you seem to need one.”

“Never hurts.” He picked up Moira’s.

“Is Gregory alive?”

“No.” He shrugged. “I’m used to someone tapping out or a ref telling me to stop. Got carried away.” He didn’t sound upset about it.

“Restraint is not exactly my watchword, either.” I took a good look around. Claudia and the Major Doggies had cleared out their portion. I could see bodies down, but they didn’t look like ours. Glanced toward where I’d sent Chuckie. We had a lot of people over there, and most of them looked like crap.

Jareen ran over to me. “We have just two battles still going on.” She pointed. One was Martini and Neeraj against Kyrellis. And the other was Lenore and Uma against the Cat People and Queen Renata.

Kyrellis did a leaping splits kick and hit Martini and Neeraj in their guts. They both went down. She swung her staff up, over Martini. He wasn’t moving.

“KYRELLIS!” I bellowed as loudly as I could. She stopped and turned. I bent down and yanked Moira’s head up by her hair. “Guess what?”

She arched back and screamed. It sounded how I figured a thousand banshees in an echo chamber would. And while she was occupied, I decided to see if the rusty javelin skills were up to the task. Did the little run, aimed, and threw. Kyrellis wasn’t looking at me or at the staff heading toward her.

Jareen and I ran forward. I didn’t have to ask her plan. Get our guys, get them out of the way of danger. My impromptu javelin hit just as Kyrellis straightened up. Unfortunately, it speared through her hip, meaning she wasn’t dead.

She bared her teeth at me. “I will kill him in the worst way possible.” She spun her staff and aimed it right at Martini’s groin.

Jareen’s staff hit Kyrellis’ and knocked it out of her hand. It fell, missed Martini by a hair, and rolled away. Kyrellis snarled and pulled my staff out of her body. Now she aimed it at Neeraj. I decided it was my turn to represent again and went for the long jump.

Hit Kyrellis in her chest. Due to her injury, it knocked her down. Due to her being the Amazonian Super Bitch, she held onto the staff. I tried to scramble away, but she got me, dragged me back, and slammed me up against her, my back to her chest. She also wrapped her other arm around me and started to squeeze. My arms were free, but the best I could do was lock my hands against her chin to keep her from headbutting me.

I had perfect clarity. I could see Tito drag Martini away and Jareen do the same with Neeraj. Others ran up to help them. I saw Claudia slam adrenaline into Martini’s chest, heard him bellow, saw Claudia and Tito throw themselves on him, saw Jareen do something to Neeraj to bring him back to consciousness. I had the clarity because Kyrellis was squeezing the life out of me, and I got the feeling I was getting to see everyone before she crushed me to death.

“I will make you pay,” she whispered. “My God will take you to the depths of hell.”

“There a lot of men in your hell?” I gasped out.

“Yes. They will have their way with you constantly.”

“Sounds like heaven to me.” Maybe I’d luck out and when Martini died, he’d end up there. I could spend eternity with him ravaging me.

She snarled at me. “I am not confused by you. You are a warrior. You don’t belong to any man.” She spat the word. “You belong with us, with the Free Women.”

“I like Renata. I could hang with her. You, not so much.”

“Renata is weak.”

“She’s your queen.” I was starting to black out.

“I serve my God.”

“Your ‘god’ is taking orders from a man.”

“You know nothing about my God.”

“I know everything about your god.”

“I will not kill you,” Kyrellis whispered to me. “I will save you and show you the true way.”

I found myself wondering what ACE was doing, since I wasn’t feeling like I was going to survive this encounter. Then again, death might be better than what I guessed Kyrellis had in store for me if she let me live. My arms were weakening, and my vision was at pinpoint. I wasn’t out, but I was close. I wondered when I’d feel my ribs crack.

I heard a crack, and Kyrellis let go a bit. I took a breath—the crack hadn’t been my ribs. My vision came back a little. Someone was on his knees next to us, hitting Kyrellis in the head. With his bare fists. He was doing damage . . . and he was growling.

She released me and shoved me away, presumably to focus on the stronger threat. Martini was high on adrenaline, and he was at “lion takes over the veldt” with his roar. His hands were moving so fast I couldn’t see them anymore. Kyrellis was still in it, and she managed to grab him around his waist and use that to turn herself and get onto her knees.

Before she could capitalize on this, Martini made a double fist and slammed his hands down on the back of her head. He did this until she stopped moving—then he did it some more.

I could breathe, and nothing seemed broken. My feet hurt, but I’d run around barefoot in the desert before; I could ignore it. Good. I got to my hands and knees. “Jeff.” He didn’t stop. “Jeff, baby . . . stop. I think she’s dead.”

He looked at me and his eyes were wild. “I know what she wanted to do to you.”

“It doesn’t matter now.” My body was shaking. “Jeff, it’s not over.”

Martini took Kyrellis’ head and twisted. If she hadn’t been dead before, she was now. He threw her body away and grabbed me. His hearts were pounding, and he was shaking. I held him and let him rock me for a few moments.

A scream rang out. We both turned toward the sound. Tito had, as near as I could tell, just broken Lenore’s neck. Claudia had Wrolph’s arm around her shoulders and was trying to get him back to the others. Queen Renata, Felicia, and Arup were nearby. But the scream was from Uma. She was swinging her ax in a circle, and as Claudia and Wrolph got closer, I could see he’d been slashed.

“Tito, down!” I shouted as loudly as I could, and he ducked. Uma’s ax whizzed over his head. He rolled away, but she was after him. Queen Renata planted her staff and used it to steady herself as she swung her body toward Uma. She connected with Uma’s side and staggered her enough that the next swing of the ax also missed Tito.

“GET OUT!” Martini bellowed.

Tito didn’t argue, he ran. But the other three didn’t. Uma turned and started bearing down on them again. She looked uninjured, and she was still glowing.

Uma hit Felicia. Felicia screamed, a cat’s shriek of pain. Arup managed to grab her. He lifted her into his arms and ran back to the others. Uma’s ax just missed him.

“Jeff, we have to get Renata away from her.”

“On it.” Martini ran at hyperspeed. I couldn’t see him, but I saw Queen Renata go flying just before Uma’s ax cleaved her in two.

I stood up. “Bitch Leader!”

Uma looked at me. “You. How dare you still stand!”

“It’s a human thing. We Americans pride ourselves on it.” I picked up a staff. “We’re all over the scrappy attitudes. The get-knocked-down-and-get-back-up mind-set.”

She smiled. “You will not get up again.”

I shrugged and used it as an opportunity to relax my back and shoulders a bit. “Your side’s down. Just the White Queen to protect her king. I still have active pieces on the board.”

“They can’t help you.”

We were close to each other. Not close enough for the weapons to hit, but close enough that we didn’t have to scream.

“They aren’t supposed to help me, are they? Not now.”

“No. You will face me as your final test.”

“Babe, you know, you can stop with the My Royal Lord crap, I know the plan. I know what’s inside you and what King Creepola has planned. I also know that you’re going to be very expendable once you send your god-in-the-machine inside him.”

She laughed. “But that presumes I will let him have this power. We have discussed it—the power is better in a woman. Stronger, more ruthless.”

“The power doesn’t have to work like that. It can protect and serve and love.”

“Your planet is weaker than mine, your power is weaker than mine, and you are weaker than me. I will enjoy killing you.”

“Uma? Got one thing to say to you.” I shifted into a fighting stance. “Bring it.”

CHAPTER 53

AS I WAITED FOR UMA TO MAKE A MOVE, ACE spoke in my head. Kitty, ACE wants Kitty to know that Kitty and ACE will be fighting together now. Kitty will see things as ACE can see them, do things as ACE can do them.

Come again? ACE? Haven’t you been helping me all this fight?

No, Kitty. ACE did not need to.

Wow. I really was black-belt material.

ACE spoke again, and he sounded embarrassed. Kitty is very . . . lucky. That is good.

Maybe I’d wait to go for the brown-belt test.

ACE thinks that might be wise.

Geez . . . I didn’t even have to actively think the thought with ACE inside. I wondered if Martini could read me like this now.

Not quite. Jeff is very upset. All the others are very upset.

Why?

The other consciousness and ACE have blocked everyone out. Kitty and Uma will fight alone now. No one can help Kitty.

Other than you.

Yes.

That’s all I’ll need, ACE.

ACE subsided, but I could feel him there. It was as though my whole mind expanded to see every living thing in the world and beyond. It was startling and amazing and a little frightening. Distracting, in a way, but a scary Valkyrie with a loaded ax can really pull you back into the moment.

Uma ran toward me, and I knew we were moving fast, but it seemed slow at the same time. I looked into her eyes, and I could see the other consciousness there. It was filled with hatred and anger, and it despised me, despised us, despised ACE most of all. By taking a name ACE had become more human, and so the other one loathed ACE.

Uma’s ax swung, I dodged, and it whizzed by me. I flipped the staff toward her stomach. She twirled, and the staff missed. She kept spinning, the ax swung toward my head. I ducked and spun the staff toward her legs. Uma jumped and landed farther away.

This went on for what seemed like moments and hours at the same time. I was tired, but stopping wasn’t an option.

The song in my ears changed, and I realized I still had my iPod on. I’d been so involved with staying alive that I hadn’t noticed. Aerosmith’s “Nine Lives” came yowling on. I started to laugh.

“What is funny?” Uma hadn’t hit me yet, but I hadn’t hit her, either.

“God likes me.”

“Your God does not exist. Only power exists.”

“You know, every time I fight some fugly monster or crazy bitch like yourself, Uma, someone tells me there is no God. But I know they’re wrong.”

Uma lunged at me, but I managed to jump out of the way. As I did, I realized we weren’t on the ground any more. We were floating in the air.

Looking around at the view was stupid. Uma slammed into me, with her body, not her ax. I was lucky that way. Not so lucky that I didn’t lose hold of my staff. It fell, and apparently it didn’t get to float if I wasn’t holding it. I saw it hit the ground and stick in the sand.

I rolled and kept rolling, Uma’s ax just missing where I had been a moment before. I started to feel like a hamster in a ball.

AC/DC’s “Back in Black” came on. Fitting—I was the Black Queen, after all. I managed to roll and shove away against nothing to get far enough way from Uma to get to my feet. I started running.

I was a sprinter, and I was staying in front of her. But the superconsciousnesses had created some sort of weird bubble around us. Which meant I was running in circles, but circles in any direction, including the impossible ones. Laws of gravity seemed suspended, but the ax was still missing me, so I was good with it.

ACE, any shot of us doing something more proactive? Just asking.

If ACE does, she will attack the others.

An odd thought occurred. ACE . . . name her. Name the other consciousness.

ACE cannot do that, Kitty! ACE does not have the right.

Why not? I name stuff all the time.

Uma was almost on me. Decided to see just how out of whack with the laws of physics we were. Instead of running, I jumped. I was standing upside down on the air, so the ground looked like the sky to me. I jumped for the ground.

It worked. I was across our Super Hamster Ball, and I hadn’t gone splat.

Decided all the talking in my mind was getting old. “ACE, name her!”

“Who are you talking to?” Uma shouted at me while she barreled toward me.

I jumped again, in a different direction. “I’m talking to ACE. He’s in me. Like Lilith Fair is in you.”

“That is not her name!”

“Well, she didn’t pick one, neither did you. ACE and I like Lilith. Sort of fitting.”

“Stop using that name!”

Wow, this really bugged them. Good. “Lilith and Uma, sittin’ in a tree, trying to kill poor little Kit-ty.” Hey, wasn’t the greatest rhyme, but I was trying to stay alive here.

This continued for a bit, me taunting, them trying to kill me. I didn’t have a weapon other than my speed and my mouth, both of which were running down. The ball of nothing we were in shifted—I got the impression Lilith had won some fight she and ACE were having at the same time, a fight I couldn’t comprehend but could just feel in the background—and I went flying.

Landed flat on my back. Facing the ground. The trippiness was what I expected hard drugs to do to a person. Found myself glad I’d never indulged and swore to never start. My stomach didn’t enjoy the view.

The wind was knocked out of me, so I got to see how upset and frightened everyone on the ground looked. Chuckie, Tito, Reader, and Michael were restraining Martini. All the other males from Earth were down, though they appeared to be alive. Animal Planet was fifty-fifty on the sexes. Bottom line—our side was battered.

Uma thundered toward me, ax up. She swung, I dodged. Swing, dodge, swing. I was still on my back, and her legs were straddling me. I wasn’t going to luck out much longer.

I saw someone extract from our group—Jareen was running, toward our bubble if I was any judge. There was something on her shoulder, and I realized it was a Poof. I wondered if Poofikins was alive or squished in my jacket pocket, but I was too busy dodging to say anything.

Jareen grabbed my staff out of the ground. “Kitty!” She threw it, with a lot better aim than I had. It pierced the bubble we were in and sailed right for me. I grabbed Uma’s leg and used it to help slide myself under her. Rolled, jumped up, and grabbed the staff as if I’d done this move a thousand times before.

Chose not to marvel. Spun and stabbed, just as Uma was spinning, ax over her head, and coming for me.

The staff went through her stomach. All the way through to the middle and stuck there. I leaped back as she stared at me. “I . . . cannot die.”

“Wanna bet?”

The ax fell out of her hands and tumbled to the ground. She grabbed the staff with both hands and tried to pull it out of herself. The bubble we were in started shaking.

Uma looked at me again. “I . . . cannot die. She . . . promised.”

“She lied.” I watched the light go out of Uma’s eyes. “Sayonara, Bitch Leader.” I looked around. “ACE, we going down?”

Yes, Kitty. Lilith is still fighting to survive.

I thought about what I knew from when we’d first found ACE. “Take us down, to Jareen.” The bubble started to lower. “Soul sister! Need your help, if you’re up for it.”

Jareen nodded, but Lilith still had some power, because our bubble shifted, far away from Jareen and the others. It was shaking, and I saw Uma’s body tumble out and hit the ground, staff still inside her. I knew she was dead.

I also knew when the bubble was gone because I started to tumble as if gravity was back and seriously pissed that I’d ignored it for so long. I closed my eyes and winced. This was going to hurt. A lot.

But it didn’t hurt all that much. Because instead of hitting the ground, I fell where I’d been falling for the past year—into Martini’s arms.

“Ooof!” Okay, it wasn’t the most smooth or romantic thing he could have said, but I was okay with it.

“I’m not that heavy!”

“Baby, you’re not heavy at all. You just fell a long way.” He was shaking. “I hate it when you do that, you know.” I shifted and wrapped my legs around his waist. He grinned. “But I so love it when you do that.”

I kissed him, hard. But not too long. “Jeff, you have to get me back to Jareen.”

“I’m right here.” So she was. Forgot, all these folks had the superspeed. “Naked Apes are really into public displays of affection. It’s nauseating back there, and here, and you’ve rubbed off on the Cat People and Major Doggies, too.”

“Jeff, meet Jareen, my new best friend forever. Jareen, we need to channel Lilith the Bitch Goddess through you. Jeff, need to get down.” Martini released me unwillingly.

“Er . . . while that sounds great, I think I’ll choose not becoming like Uma.”

Kitty, we must do it now. ACE cannot contain Lilith any longer.

“Has to be now. Jareen, it goes through you, and you birth it. Somehow. Otherwise, Lilith will be around and able to join with someone like Uma, or someone worse.”

Jareen looked apprehensive, at least as much as a Giant Lizard could. “Why me?”

“Because you’re just like Kitty,” Martini said. “Only green and with a tail. But personality and brainwise? You’re her twin.”

Kitty!

“ACE is freaking, Jareen. Please.” I took her hand.

She nodded. “Okay. Tell Neeraj—”

We didn’t get to find out what she wanted us to tell him, though I could guess, because her head went back sharply. Martini caught her before she went down. She was rigid, but because ACE was inside me, I could see a glowing substance funneling into her. It went in golden, but it came out all the colors of the Pantone Matching System color book.

I watched the color motes fly through the air. They swirled around everyone with us, then everyone on the planet, then the planet itself. I watched via ACE, so I saw the colored pieces of Lilith’s consciousness swirl through our solar system then move off, toward Alpha Centauri.

It is done. Lilith is scattered. ACE sounded sad.

Are we safe from her?

Yes. Lilith is one with the cosmos now and can join God.

Interesting. Even the superconsciousnesses got to go to Heaven apparently. Even the ones who’d tried to take over the universe.

God forgives.

Oh, right. ACE heard more than top-layer, focused thoughts. How could God forgive her?

Once Lilith was . . . birthed . . . Lilith saw all and so could understand Lilith’s wrongdoing. And repent. ACE sounded a little unsure on this point, and I decided we could table the rest of our intergalactic comparative religion course for another time. However, ACE still sounded sad.

Do you envy her?

In a way. But ACE pities Lilith more. ACE has what Lilith did not.

Love.

Yes. Because of Kitty.

No. Because of ACE. You loved Earth before you met me, ACE. You cared and protected and mourned its inhabitants as your own. You did that, not me, not Paul. You could have told us you were God and we would have believed you. But you didn’t, because you also have humility. If you want to leave us, I’ll birth you. But if you want to stay, we would be happier.

ACE wants to stay. ACE has a home here, and a purpose.

Jareen groaned and came back. “That sucked. Did it work?”

“Yes, good job. You birthed a demigoddess and saved the universe.”

She grinned at me. “So, from what I gather for you guys, routine.”

CHAPTER 54

“LET’S GO HOME,” Martini said.

“It’s not over, Jeff.”

“Looks over to me.”

“Where’s the battle cruiser?”

“Good point.” Martini looked up. “I don’t see it, but that might not mean anything.”

Kitty, the ship has taken its shuttles and is heading back to Alpha Centauri.

Why?

The rules must be followed.

They have rules and follow them?

Yes. Does Kitty wish a listing of the rules?

No, ACE. I’ll take your word for it. Of course, our game has rules, too. I told Martini that the ship was gone.

“Good, so we’re done.”

“No. We have to take the king.”

He groaned. “How? He’s on Alpha Four.”

ACE?

Yes, Kitty. Who should come?

All, if they can stand the trip.

Many are hurt, but all can survive it.

And come back?

If they choose to. There was evasion in ACE’s tone.

I know what’s coming. And what I have to risk.

Very well.

Billy Idol’s ‘Cradle of Love’ started in my ears as I felt ACE gather us all up, dead bodies included.

“Fitting song.” Martini put his arm around me.

“You can hear it?” I wondered if my iPod was too loud.

“I think we can all hear it. ACE must like your musical taste. Someone should.”

We time warped. That’s the only way to describe it, though we didn’t have to dance or anything. But once we were all in ACE’s bubble, so to speak, we shifted. I could see the planets, stars, and empty space whiz by us, but I got the impression I was the only one who could.

We landed at a plaza in front of a place that made Martini Manor look like welfare housing. Frankly, it made the Taj Mahal look skimpy. Huge, white, built on the side of a hill—the architects had wanted to make darned sure that when you stood at the bottom of the many steps leading up you knew you were an insignificant peasant.

“Guess this is your family estate.”

“Yeah.” Martini sounded awed. I did my best not to feel anything about that.

A crowd appeared around us. It parted a bit as a group of people came down the stairs. One was old and leaning on a cane. I didn’t buy that he needed it and figured this was King Adolphus.

I looked around. Our group was all on its feet. Sure, some of our group were being held up on their feet, but we were still standing. On cue, Elton John’s “I’m Still Standing” came on.

“Barely,” Tim called out. The others chuckled. Nice to know ACE wanted to share my tunes with everyone. I wasn’t sure they worked for the others like they did for me, but I didn’t have any time to worry about it because King Creepola was in front of us.

The king stopped at a stair landing about fifty steps above us and looked around. “The Rituals are completed!” His voice boomed. He wasn’t bellowing like Martini—it was more like he was speaking through a super-duper sound system.

“How’s he doing that?”

“Troubadour.” Martini sounded as unimpressed with that skill as Christopher had when he’d told me about it. “Vocal projection is one of the traits.”

“Well, that explains a lot.” Most actors don’t want to give up the gig of a lifetime, after all. I detached from Martini. “Wait here, Jeff.”

I took off my headphones, put my iPod into a jacket pocket, and started up the stairs at a trot. The king was glaring at me. I didn’t care. He wasn’t getting to win with no pieces left on the board. I did have a question, though. ACE, how is it I can understand him and see him move at human speeds?

ACE is providing translations for sight and sound. All will understand and see each other.

You rock. I looked up. Sadly, I was still a lot of steps away from the king.

“You are found not worthy,” he said to me, voice still booming out.

I shrugged and kept on going. No one tried to stop me. Reached his level without panting. My track coaches had lived by the train and pain method. Fifty stairs was nothing, I’d learned to do two hundred at a go.

“You are not worthy in my sight,” he said. Close up he was kind of icky. If I stripped away decades, he might have once looked good. Now, he looked old and shriveled. He didn’t have old person smell, which confirmed to me he wasn’t nearly as decrepit as he was acting. Happily, I didn’t see Alfred in him anywhere, so I could comfort myself that, should I ever get married to him, Martini wouldn’t age like this.

“Yeah, and you’re really gross, but, hey, we can’t have everything.” My voice was booming, too. “Wow, you a walking microphone or something?”

“Hardly,” he snarled.

ACE is projecting Kitty’s voice.

Thanks, big guy. I looked around. “Nice view. Bet it’s better from way up top there. So, just to bring the populace up to speed with the Reader’s Digest version of current events, you’ve been plotting to overthrow the entire solar system’s planetary leaders, toss a godlike superconsciousness inside yourself, then rule everyone forever from on high. Did I miss anything?”

“How dare you?” He was bellowing, but still, Martini did it better.

“Oh, blah, blah, blah. ACE? Any way you can save us all a lot of time and needless blathering and just show the folks at home what’s been going on across the railroad tracks?”

I felt something radiate out of me. There were gasps and a lot of muttering. I felt it circle this world and send itself out to the other worlds in the solar system. Thanks. Hope it wasn’t overkill.

They deserved to know.

King Adolphus glared at me. Not up to Martini’s standards, let alone Christopher’s. “You are still found unworthy.”

“Whatever, Kitler. It’s time to pick the successor.”

“I am not dead.” He snarled at me. “But you soon will be.” He raised his cane up over his head.

I heard a growl. First one, then several. Poofikins burst out of my pocket, landed in front of me, and went Martini-sized. The other Poofs all joined it, bodies and teeth set to full. I had a Poof blockade between me and the king. All growling.

Adolphus started to back up, but a new growl announced another Poof. I assumed it was Tenley since it showed up behind the king. “I think the Poofs have a different view, Dolph-man.”

“I am the ruler here!” he thundered.

Poof growling increased. “Doesn’t seem like they care. Or agree. Could be that they know there are several options down below us, all better fit to lead and rule than you ever were, as near as I can tell.”

I didn’t want Martini picking up anything from me right now. ACE, can you make sure Jeff can’t feel what I’m feeling?

ACE has already, Kitty, since Kitty chose to come here. ACE understands.

Thanks.

Adolphus was back with the thundering. “Citizens, you must destroy these invaders and traitors!” I checked—nobody moved.

“I don’t think they like you much any more, Kitler.”

“I am the sanctified ruler!”

“Sanctified? Dude, did you miss it? Your Amazonian Assassin Squad’s been destroyed, literally, so you have no fighting force to support you. Your battle cruiser’s on the way home, pretty much devoid of personnel. Your demigoddess is declawed and defanged. You aren’t going to get to join up and live forever, sorry not so much.”

“You are a failure as a future queen,” he snarled at me. “Even if he stays, you will not stay with him.”

“I know.” I did. My throat was tight and I wanted to cry about it, but I’d realized where we were heading as soon as I saw the outline of the real plan.

Adolphus looked at me. His expression was familiar; I’d seen it a lot for the last year or so—enraged insanity focused solely on me. I was the girl all the psychos and megalomaniacs wanted to hang with, after all.

“You. This is all your fault.”

“Pretty much, yeah. That’s how I roll, Trouble Chick to the Rescue, sort of thing. Destroy the decades’ worth of planning in a couple of days. Yep, sounds familiar.”

“I will destroy you.”

“Already tried. Already failed. You saying you’re ready to go head-to-head with me now?”

His answer was to lunge for me. I didn’t have to answer back. The Poofs did it for me.

Adolphus was devoured. There weren’t even any bones left. The Poofs finished up, burped discreetly, then went back to small. They trotted over to me and purred.

I had no choice.