Текст книги "Out Of The Blue"

Автор книги: Carina Adams

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 10 (всего у книги 20 страниц)

Molly cupped her hand to her chest, as if it could stop her heart from hurting. “Mikey.” She moved away from the railing, forgetting her drink, and reached for my hand as she sat in her chair. “I never realized Janet was your daughter.” I didn’t correct her, because for a little while, Janet had been mine. “Do you get to see her?”

I shook my head. “Sometimes. Not as much as I should. I didn’t want to for a long time. It hurt too much.” I’d never admitted that to anyone. Instead, I let everyone believe that Julie had told me not to visit, that it had been her choice to shut me out. In reality, it had been too fucking painful.

“And now?” Her voice was curious, not condescending.

“Now I miss her like fucking crazy. Jake talks about her, tries to fill me in on the things I’ve missed. But it’s not the same.” I took a deep breath, hoping it would calm me. “Do you ever get to hear how your son is doing?”

Her hand tightened around mine and a genuine smile lit her face. “He’s amazing. I actually get to see him three times a year: on his birthday, on my birthday, and at Christmas. We talk a couple of times a month now that he’s older.”

I couldn’t hide my surprise. “It was an open adoption?”

“Yeah. The Joneses insisted on it. The day he was born, Kathy came into my room and sat with us. She said I was giving her the best gift anyone had ever given her, that I was making her dreams come true, and promised that she would never take him for granted. She insisted that we were family now and that we would always be connected. She swore that if I went through with it, if I let them adopt him, that I would never miss a moment of his life.”

The smile dropped a little and she turned away. She rubbed her free palm up and down her thigh before reaching into her pocket for her phone. Releasing my hand, she scrolled through her pictures until she found the one she was looking for and offered it to me. An adorable toddler with dark black hair and his mommy’s eyes grinned cheekily up at the camera.

“His name is Bryant.” I could hear the happiness as she told me about her son. “He’s ten, a big brother to a very rambunctious four-year-old. He knows I’m his birth mom because his parents didn’t want to hide anything from him, but he says I’m his best friend by choice.”

She smiled, showing me another picture. This one was of the two of them, playing in what looked like Lego nirvana. They were laughing at something, and the pure joy I could see in their faces was heartwarming.

“He is such a good boy.” The pride on her face was that of a mom who loved her child. “I sometimes lie awake and wonder what life would be like for us if I hadn’t let go that day. Would he be as happy? Would he be as carefree? Or would he be sad and miserable?”

“Don’t do that. Don’t ask yourself questions that have no answers. You’ll drive yourself crazy.”

“I can’t help it. He’s not mine anymore, but I love him. I don’t think I could love him any more if he was still mine. There isn’t a doubt in my mind that his mom loves him just as much, but that doesn’t make me stop wondering about the what-ifs. Does that make sense?”

It made complete sense. “I wasn’t there when Jake was born. I didn’t get to meet him until he was almost a year old. I loved him before I ever met him. I’d look at the pictures Julie would send and be amazed at how perfect he was. The moment I held him in my arms the first time was pure magic. He was my boy and we were bonded by so much more than blood.

“But for Janet, I was there every step of the way. I got to cut the umbilical cord, I gave her her first bath, and she spent her entire first day in this world wrapped up in my arms while her mommy slept next to us. She wasn’t mine, but you couldn’t have convinced me that day. Our connection was so strong I never could have given her up, never in a million years. Knowing she’s not mine doesn’t change how I feel.”

Molly stood up again, walking back to the screen in front of us. “It’s been eleven and a half years Mike, and I still don’t know if I made the right choice that day. I’ve worked my ass off to get where I am because I want him to be proud of me. But what happens if he grows up and thinks the way Roxy does—that I gave him up so I could have my career? What happens if he resents me for the choices I made?”

I stood, closing the gaps between us. Pulling her into my arms, I tucked my chin into her neck. “Not gonna happen, Mols. It sounds like he hit the lottery. He didn’t get just one set of parents who would do anything for him, he got two. He’ll never see it that way.”

She melted back into me. “How can you be so sure?”

The sadness and doubt in her tone wrecked me. She’d done this amazing, selfless thing, and given her son a chance to have a great life, as well as given a couple a chance to be parents. Molly Ray was the whole damn package: smart, sweet, beautiful, kind, and sexy as fuck. She didn’t see any of that though, because all she saw were the flaws.

“Because he loves you. Because he’ll see you the way I do, for who you really are,” I whispered before kissing her ear. She sighed, moving into me, and I moved my lips in a path down her neck. When she turned, her lips finding mine, I didn’t pull away. Instead, my palms cupped her ass and I lifted her until she wrapped her legs around my waist.

A million warning bells went off in my mind, as the rational part of my brain tried to tell the rest of me that what I was about to do was a bad idea. I ignored them all. I’d probably kick myself in the ass tomorrow, but right now, I needed to take our minds off the melodramatic bullshit that seemed to follow us both around.

I needed to do what I’d been trying to avoid for days. Being with her was inevitable. I needed to make her forget, to take her mind off her life. I needed to make her mine, even if it was just for a little while.

Chapter Fifteen

~ Molly ~

Good God the man could kiss. I didn’t know what he was doing that was so different, but his lips ignited my body everywhere. I wasn’t drunk, and my buzz was long gone, but when he kissed me the way he did right now, it made me lightheaded and woozy, and unable to focus on anything but what he did to my body.

So much for making him beg for it. Screw that. If he stopped now, I’d be the one on my knees, praying to the gods to change his mind.

His hands groped my ass roughly, pulling me flush against him, leaving me no option other than to wrap my legs around his waist and hold on. He left the doors open as he carried me to the bed, climbing up onto it from the bottom. I clung to him as tightly as I could, my mouth moving against his as he lowered us carefully to the middle of the bed.

He didn’t do more than kiss me, but good Christ, when you were as talented as he was, that’s all it took. Forget the foreplay I usually needed to get me turned on. And fuck those clueless assholes who had spent what seemed like hours trying to get me hot and still needed instruction.

How many women has he had to kiss to perfect that talent? The unwelcome thought hit me hard, making me stiffen against him. No. I would not sabotage this night like I had so many others. I wanted him and I was going to have him. I wasn’t going to think about his past.

Mike, feeling the change in my body, pulled away, pushing his weight off me and holding himself above me. His eyes searched my face, his own looking serious. “Mols.” His voice was low, gravely, and sexy as hell. I needed to record it and sell it to an adult toy store. They’d make a killing; it was enough to set any woman’s panties on fire.

A finger traced my bruised cheek gently, pulling me from my absurd thoughts. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?” I shook my head.

“Hey.” He spoke again, this time, his tone was softer, worried, and I met his eyes. “Want me to stop?”

The question surprised me and I shook my head again. There were a hundred things I wanted him to do, but none of them involved him stopping. Or staying in his clothes.

“Tell me this is what you want.”

I nodded as furiously as I could against the mattress.

“Molly,” he growled as he pushed his lower body into mine, “tell me what you want.”

“You. That is the only thing I want right now.”

A slow, contagious smile moved over his lips and he cocked an eyebrow, moving his eyes back to my lips. “That so?”

I nodded just once, smiling back. That was all the encouragement he needed, lowering himself back down so damn slowly I was sure he’d never get there. Instead of kissing me, he nibbled down my neck and back up to my ear, avoiding my lips as I tried to lock them onto his. He repeated the movement, nipping into my skin gently every few inches before sucking the bottom of my ear into his mouth roughly. After he’d tormented me, he moved back to my lips, nipping my bottom lip roughly before soothing the ache with a quick lick of his tongue.

“Please,” I begged, not sure what I asking for.

There was no hesitating, no more thinking. His hands moved quickly, clawing and shoving my clothes off. I worked with him, desperate to be free of anything that would keep me from getting what I wanted. I kicked off my shoes as Mike focused on the sensitive area between my neck and collarbone, and then he slid his body to my side slightly, allowing me to lift my hips so he could yank my pants down my legs. I jerked my feet, frantically trying to shed the cotton.

I wasn’t sure where his shirt had gone, or when he’d disposed of it, but I was too distracted by the deep ridges of his stomach I’d seen earlier to actually care. The lines felt as good as they looked and made me want to touch more of him. Mike was strong and hard in all the right places.

Including his dick, which was finally making an appearance, jabbing me in the inner thigh every time one of us moved. I slid my hand down, away from the abs I loved so much, over the defined hip bones, into his jeans, and under the band of his boxer briefs. The lack of hair intrigued me, but I’d focus on that later. Right now, all I wanted was my prize.

Mike growled, grabbing my wandering fingers and pulling them away from him, forcing my arm up over my head. Within seconds, he’d captured my other as well and pushed it to the top of the bed. Securing both my wrists with one of his giant hands, he braced his weight on his free elbow and smirked down at me. “They stay there.”

Before I could argue, or insist that I needed to touch him more than I needed my next breath, he lowered his mouth to my neck and worked his way down the center of my chest, tongue warm and wet, blazing a trail that left the rest of me scorched. As he reached my bra, he released my hands to pull the thin cotton down just enough to free my breasts, not bothering to unbuckle it.

“Fuck.” The word was more of a breath of surprise than a curse as my cleavage spilled over. His eyes darted back to mine as fingers played with one of my nipple rings, flicking it gently, making me moan. He twisted the metal again, causing my lower body to grind against his, and then his mouth replaced his fingers, teeth and tongue pulling on the bar. Never breaking eye contact, he moved to the other peak and sucked the tip into his mouth, pulling his head back and stretching me. I moaned and lowered my arms, knotting my fingers in his hair, yanking him closer, silently begging for more.

Instead of moving into me, Mike jerked away. He narrowed his eyes briefly as he pushed my hands back above my head. “Don’t fucking move them.” He was so serious, so animated, that I almost started to giggle. The smile fell from my lips as soon as his teeth closed around a nipple again. Within minutes I was writhing and grinding against him while my hands clutched the pillow under my head.

His fingers drew unrecognizable pictures as they tickled over my ribs, and he suckled, kissed, and nipped his way down my body. His tongue circled around my belly button, dipping into it briefly as if to distract my mind from the fact that his hands had wandered south as well, finding my panties.

Slowly, so fucking slowly, his head moved over the softness of my stomach as his fingers traced the outline of my pussy. My breath came in short spurts, chest rising and falling quickly as his fingers moved between my folds, teasing, focusing on my clit. I bit my lip, weaving my fingers together, trying to keep my hands where he’d instructed.

Too soon, he moved his fingers away, and before I could protest, his mouth was there, tongue replacing his fingers. It was the ultimate tease. I could feel the heat of his breath, the wetness from his saliva, but the cotton was in the way. I craved more. Without thinking, I yanked my hands down, trying to direct him to the spot that needed his immediate attention.

Mike reared back on his knees, glaring. “Put your fucking hands by the pillow, Molly.” His voice was eerily low, but I didn’t move. “Don’t make me tie them.” I knew it wasn’t an idle threat, and for some insane reason, the idea excited me. Yet I did what I was told.

He waited until they were secured under my pillow, then reached out and ripped my panties off. A surprised yelp fell from my mouth, but he either didn’t notice or didn’t care. Instead, he focused on the exposed part of me.

“So fucking wet.” He muttered as a single calloused knuckle invaded me, starting at the bottom and sliding its way to the top, spreading my juices. He leaned back down between my legs, biting the inside of my thigh as his mouth moved closer to me. I ground myself against him, gasping for air and ready to beg. “So wet, just for me.”

His eyes found mine as he slid his mouth to the place I wanted it the most, dropping a single kiss. Giving me a shit eating grin, he lifted just enough to make me think he was pulling away. I gasped, begging him not to stop. His grin only grew wider, and he bit his bottom lip seductively as he slid both of his hands up to my boobs, each finding a hardened nub and pinching.

When his tongue finally stretched out, tasting me, I jumped in surprise. He was a goddamn pro, meticulous, using teeth, tongue, and fingers. I tried to watch him, mesmerized by what he was doing, but it only took seconds before I closed my eyes, tipping my head back, and cried out. I longed to touch him, to hold his hands, to sink my fingernails into his back.

Every inch of my body was alive, every nerve on end. My toes curled and my legs jerked up, closing around his ears. I knew I was close, but when his hands slid under my ass, grabbing it so hard his fingernails definitely left marks, and lifted me to him as he hummed against me, I crashed over the edge.

He didn’t stop.

Instead of letting me drift back to earth peacefully and reciprocate, he took it as his own personal mission to keep working me until I was a pile of mush with nothing left to give. My voice was practically gone, hoarse from moaning and yelling, ‘Oh, my God,’ on repeat, but I reached for him as he finally released his hold on me.

“Mike, I…” I didn’t know what to say. “Thank you” seemed stupid and “Holy fucking shit that was amazing” was too much. I wanted to give him what he had given me, but I couldn’t find the energy to even sit up.

He shook his head as he wiped his chin and beamed at me. “Sleep, baby. Just sleep.”

“Not without you,” I managed to mumble, even though my eyes were trying to defy me and close without permission.

Thankfully, he smiled and nodded, moving next to me on the bed and pulling me into his arms, tucking them around me and holding me tight. I was safe, completely at ease, and utterly satisfied for the first time in forever. My brain didn’t try to keep me awake thinking about things I couldn’t change or things I should worry about. This fog was a million times better than one of my drunk fogs.

Mike chuckled when I told him that, kissing my forehead and telling me I needed sleep. I agreed, but one last thought hit me. “There’s only one bed in here. Where were you supposed to sleep?”

He didn’t answer, tucking his chin into my neck and kissing me instead.

*****

Every part of me was sore. I groaned as I rolled onto my back, ready to curse my personal trainer, but that hurt too much and I moved back to my side. I scratched my arm absentmindedly, suddenly realizing I was naked. I stilled, trying to figure out if I was alone, as memories from the night before bubbled to the front of my mind.

Mike!

My eyes flew open, but I was alone in the bed. I told myself it was fine, that it was better that he wasn’t there, but disappointment washed over me anyway. He was amazing, and funny, and hotter than hell. And I was a train wreck. He was so out of my league.

Last night had been… I bit my lip trying to think of the right word to describe it. It had been unbelievable. My body still felt like it was glowing from all the attention it received. But it had also been a mistake.

Mike was not only my employee, he was my friend. Someone who, in just a few short days, had become a person I trusted above all else. I had no doubt that one day we would be as close as Nate and I were. Well, even closer considering recent events. I needed all the friends I had, though, and wasn’t willing to part with one for a quick romp. Mike needed me, too, even though he probably didn’t realize it. Last night could seriously screw that friendship up if we let it.

I rolled over, sitting up to look for my clothes. Draped on the chair next to the bed, and the only article of clothing I could see, was one of mike’s tee shirts. I couldn’t keep the smile off my face as I carefully slid off the mattress and slipped the cotton over my head.

It smelled just like him.

A movement on the porch caught my eye and I moved to investigate. Mike glanced up from his paper, doing a double take before grinning a welcome. He snatched a large Dunkin Donuts Styrofoam cup off the stand and held it out to me.

“Mornin’, beautiful. How ya feeling?”

“Sore.” I scowled briefly before taking a cautious sip. I closed my eyes in appreciation as the coffee worked its way down my throat. When I opened them, he was staring at me. “You went for coffee.”

He shook his head. “Nope. I had breakfast delivered.” He held up a brown bag. “Your bagel and cream cheese.”

“Delivered?” I laughed. “Dunkin delivers here?”

“Naw.” He chuckled. “I knew one of the dipshits next door would be awake, so I called in an order. I thought it would be nice to have breakfast together while we stared at the lake, but I couldn’t go get it ‘cause I wanted to be here when you woke up.”

Excitement at his words oozed through my pores. Then reality struck and I remembered he was being paid to stick to me like glue. “I would have been fine for a few hours,” I assured him, shrugging. “Pretty sure we weren’t followed. You do get a break from babysitting every now and then.” I offered a small smile, trying to reassure him.

He arched both eyebrows, staring at me. “No one is gonna find you here unless I want them to, Mols.” He motioned to the near empty lake. “I wanted to be here because I know how you are.”

“How I am?” I turned toward him, annoyed. What in the hell was that supposed to mean?

Mike rolled his eyes. “Yeah, how you are.” He twisted his lips, turned back to the paper. “You read too much into shit. You’d see me gone and start thinking I’d run away because I fear intimacy or wonder what you did wrong. I wanted to be here to put your mind at ease.”

Well, shit.

Sighing, I moved to the chair next to him. Better to talk about it first thing I guess. Wincing, I tried to ease myself down as gently as I could. My thighs felt like I’d done a thousand squats. When I looked up, he was watching me closely.

“It’ll be worse tomorrow.”

I nodded and took another sip of caffeine. “I know. It’s always worse the second day.”

“Maybe.” His mouth twitched. “But I was talking about the repeat I have planned for tonight.”

I choked on my coffee. “Mike,” I started slowly, unsure of what to say. I’d only had one one-night stand, and thankfully, he was gone before I woke up. “I…”

“You what, Mols?” He interrupted. “Want to pretend last night never happened? Think it was a mistake?” He seemed more amused than angry, and I tipped my head, confused. “How many other lies you gonna tell yourself? Next it’ll be that you didn’t enjoy it.” He leaned over the table, closing in. “We both know that’s not true.”

My face flamed red and I swallowed hard. “Get out of my head.”

He only laughed, eyes sparkling. “Save yourself the trouble, kid. It happened. You enjoyed it as much as I did. It’s gonna happen again.”

He didn’t understand. “Mike, we can’t…”

He smirked, interrupting again. “We can, Molly. And we will. Every chance we get.”

God, he was infuriating! “It was a one-time thing. A lapse in both our judgments.”

“If you really believed that, I wouldn’t push the issue. But you don’t.” He leaned back a little. “If it’s Kelly you’re worried about, we won’t tell anyone. I’ll be your dirty little secret.”

The bastard was taking entirely too much pleasure from this conversation. “You’re an asshole.”

“Yep. And for the next few months, I’m your asshole.”

My heart hurt at the thought of being away from him. Which was just stupid, I reminded myself. He wasn’t really mine, no matter how many times he claimed he was. Sleeping with him would be a huge mistake, but hell if I wasn’t going to do it anyway. The revelation startled me.

“There she is.” He laughed and I knew he knew he’d won.

“Whatever.” I huffed, still annoyed.

He leaned close once again, invading my personal bubble. I tipped my body, trying to move away when a hand gripped my neck, holding me in place. His face went serious for a minute. “I don’t share, Molly.”

I frowned, confused for a split second. When the implication sank in, I tried to jerk away, but his arm was to strong. I narrowed my eyes, inhaling, and preparing to tell him to go straight to hell.

He pulled me closer, though, so we were nose to nose. “I licked it, Mols. That means it’s mine.”

All my agitation was gone instantly as I burst out laughing and shoved him away. “You seriously did not just say that to me. You’re such a pig.”

He laughed, transforming his entire face and making him look ten years younger. He reached for me again, this time lacing his fingers through mine. If sleeping with him was a mistake, cuddling with him while I drank coffee was a colossal mistake. I was so screwed.