Текст книги "Crave"
Автор книги: B.J. Harvey
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Текущая страница: 7 (всего у книги 17 страниц)
“All part of the service,” I add, taking her hand in mine and leading her toward the living area.
After seating her at the table, I bring our plates out from the kitchen.
“I hope you like Italian,” I say, placing the shrimp linguine in front of her before taking my seat.
“I love Italian,” she replies with a huge smile, a genuine one that warms me from the inside. Just her presence relaxes me. Whenever I’m with her I can be myself, without pretense and without expectations. It’s freeing, an exhilarating feeling that I’m finding myself becoming addicted to.
“Wine?” I ask behind my back as I grab the bottle of Chardonnay from the fridge, showing her the label when I return to the table.
“Napa Valley too,” she notes with approval. “Yes, please.” She holds her glass out to me and when I finish pouring, lifts it up to her lips. Then I watch, completely captivated as she expertly studies the wine, her tongue darting out and wetting her lips as she tips the glass and takes her first sip. Looking over at me with hooded eyes, she says, “This is a nice wine, Cal. I’m impressed.”
“Glad I passed the test,” I say wryly, pouring my own glass and taking my seat opposite her.
“I never expected anything less.” She puts her glass down on the table before taking her fork and spearing a shrimp, bringing it up to her mouth.
I’m unable to look away, mesmerized by the subtlety of her movements. So used to overt plays for my attention, I realize that everything Lucia does is effortless. By just being herself, she has captured my attention and reeled me in.
Most of the women I’ve met could learn a lot from her.
“Are you going to watch me eat all night?” she asks, snapping me out of it.
“Can I?” I joke, making her laugh.
“It would at least give me the chance to watch you too.”
I twirl the angel hair pasta around my fork, my eyes glued to Lucia’s as I take my first mouthful, closing my eyes as the taste of shrimp, garlic and parmesan take over my senses. Her answering groan makes the effort worthwhile.
After a meal, which is more foreplay than sustenance, I lean back in my seat, cradling my wine in my hands and staring out toward the bay.
“Callum, are you okay?”
Placing my glass back on the table between us, I run my fingers around the stem of the crystal mindlessly before meeting her gaze. “Sure. What makes you ask?”
“You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.” Her eyes are full of concern, an adorable crease appearing between her eyebrows as she frowns.
“I received some unfortunate news today regarding a project. It’s just a speed bump, I hope. I’m sorry if I have been terrible company this evening.”
“The meal is lovely. The company is delightful, just preoccupied and in serious need of a good scotch whisky or a rubdown.”
“Can I take both for a hundred?” I chuckle, and her lips curve into a smile.
“There he is. I knew there was a bit of humor in there.” She stands and moves to gather up our plates. I stand and stop her with my hand on her arm.
“Luce, you don’t need to do that. You’re my dinner guest. I do not expect you to clean up. I have a housekeeper for that.”
She pauses and looks around the room pointedly. “I don’t see your housekeeper here right now, so I guess I’ll just help her out. Why don’t you take your wine and we’ll go out onto the balcony? Enjoy the fresh air and that gorgeous view of yours.” She grins and picks up the plates before carrying them all to the kitchen counter.
I watch her, amazed and awed at the confidence she exudes. She seems so comfortable and at ease in my home, which makes me more comfortable having her here. It’s an unusual feeling for someone who isn’t used to, or particularly fond of, having others encroach their space.
Grabbing my wine glass, I walk out onto the balcony as suggested. I brace one arm on the aluminum railing and look up at the full moon encased in the dark midnight blue sky.
Lucia’s footsteps get closer, and just before I turn around her hands land softly on my shoulders, the warmth of her skin radiating through the thin material of my shirt. As her fingers start to gently knead the taut cords of my shoulders and back, I groan loudly and without restraint. She rotates her thumbs in wide circles on my back and I arch my chest forward, pushing her digits deeper and harder into my aching flesh.
“Mmm.” I groan as she moves her body flush against mine, the touch welcomed, desired.
“Hold on to the railing, Callum,” she instructs. With a few more minutes of kneading, I feel the day’s tension leach out of my body, my mind focused solely on the woman whose hands are molding me into the man I should be for her. The momentary loss of control unsettles me and as if she notices my thoughtful pause, she trails her hands down my chest and starts to undo the buttons of my shirt at an achingly slow pace.
“You need to let someone take care of you, Callum. You’re wound so tight, it’s a miracle you haven’t become undone.”
“You’re very perceptive,” I note.
“It wasn’t hard to notice. The minute I walked into the room I could see your shoulders locked tight, and your jaw was like stone. I prefer other parts of you to be rigid, not your whole demeanor.”
“I’m sor—”
She reaches the last button and whatever else I was going to say dissipates when Lucia’s warm hands glide back up my torso. She studies the ridges of my chest by touch, my muscles twitching beneath her skin as she eases the shirt apart before placing a soft, almost reverent kiss on my bare neck.
My whole body shudders and I feel her lips curve up against me. “It seems I’m having the right effect.”
“Maybe,” I reply hoarsely, not trusting myself not to say or do something I may regret, or not regret, which could be infinitely worse.
I don’t have time to consider the possibility because as soon as I turn around her hands are at my waist, undoing the top button of my jeans and pushing the denim down my legs.
“What are you doing?” I ask out of curiosity, knowing where I hope this is going but not wanting to be presumptuous. Especially since I’m not the one in control of this situation right now. I’m letting Lucia take the lead this time.
“I want to help you.”
“There’s nothing that will alleviate the tension. Only time and maybe some luck,” I reply wryly.
“Oh, I don’t know about that. I have a bevy of tried and true methods to relieve stress.”
I grip the railing tighter as she slides her hands inside my boxer briefs and slowly inches them down over my straining erection before moving them down my legs, tapping on each ankle so that I lift them off the ground, allowing her to remove my clothing. I look down and watch her, marveling at the grace she shows in everything she does, including stripping a man bare.
She glances up at me and our eyes lock together, the intensity of her gaze rendering me motionless.
“Tried and true?” I ask her with a growl, not missing the edge of possessiveness I didn’t know I had.
She doesn’t reply, but heat flares in her eyes as she stands, slowly running her hands up my bare legs. Her fingers splay wide around my hips and stay there as she straightens between my outstretched arms, still gripping the railing as if my life depends on it.
The vulnerable predicament I now find myself in is not lost on me. She’s succeeded in stripping me of my clothes and my control in the space of a few minutes using her hands and mouth as the weapons of choice.
“I need to touch you.” My fingers twitch with necessity. I want to feel her smooth skin beneath my palms. I want to run my hands along the curve of her ass, caressing the sensitive skin where her legs join her hips.
“This is for you, Callum.” Standing on her toes, she brushes her lips gently against mine. Teasing, giving me a taste of what I want. It’s taking all of my control to keep my hands off her but my curiosity gives me the motivation to see this through. “You need to relax. Forget about everything weighing down heavily on your shoulders and let loose. Let me do that for you.”
She wraps her arms around my neck, curling her fingers in my hair as she traces the outline of my lips with the tip of her tongue. I groan, opening my mouth and meeting her halfway. I let her take the lead and control the kiss, my cock throbbing with the need for contact of any kind.
“I can relax when I’m buried deep inside you,” I offer, a wry smile masking the growing desperation inside of me when she pulls away. I feel off balance, the ground beneath my feet unstable despite my physical state being safe and secure.
Without control I feel unsure, unable to guarantee that I can hold back the yearning to surpass Lucia’s limits. It’s one of the reasons I tried to stay away from her, but look where that got me. I’m here with that very woman, almost naked and outside. With the breathtaking view of the city I love laid out before me and the cooling spring breeze blowing against my body, I watch in awe as she runs her hands down my chest and sinks to her knees.
Anticipation courses through me as I widen my stance, bracing myself for the exquisite feeling of Lucia’s lips wrapped around my cock. “Close your eyes, Cal. Clear your mind of everything except us. Here. Me.”
My other senses converge with renewed clarity the moment I follow her request and close my eyes. I take in all of my surroundings—her breath fanning over my skin, her hands circling my thighs and resting on my hips, her fingertips digging into my ass cheeks just as the wet and warm haven of her mouth envelopes the head of my cock.
I somehow remain silent, absorbing every detail as she lowers her lips down my cock, fisting the base with one hand as she starts the telltale advance and retreat, never letting her mouth lose contact. With every smooth glide down my length, the rigidity in my body leaches out of me. With every squeeze and release of her fist I relax into her, my hips beginning a gentle thrust, testing her disposition. The moment her hand releases me, returning to my ass and pulling my groin closer to her face, forcing my cock deeper into her throat, I know I’m in trouble.
“Fuck!” I growl, my left hand lifting up from the railing to rest on the back of her head, my fingers tangling in her hair.
Pressure builds inside of me. The sounds of the neighborhood, of the city in the distance are muted—the only thing I can hear is my heavy breathing and the wet sounds of Lucia’s mouth as she devours my cock.
She moans around me. The vibration threatens to set me off but I grit my teeth and will my body to stave the desire for release. It’s the last semblance of control I have in that moment. Lucia may be the one on her knees, but I’m in no denial that she is controlling every response and reaction my body has to her in this moment.
With a scrape of her teeth against the sensitive underside of the tip, a shudder wracks through me, shaking me out of my haze. My eyes snap open and look down. The light from the living room cascades around her, but there’s no hiding the fire in her eyes. Seeing her so obviously turned on from pleasuring me goes straight to my head, and I lose the flimsy grip I had on my control.
Tightening my grip in her hair, I pull her up, lowering my hand to the nape of her neck, my thumb resting on her carotid artery, the fast thrum of her heart spurring me on. I lean down to take her mouth as she continues to stroke me hard and fast with her palm. Intense need rages through me and I can no longer control my actions. Running my other hand up her dress, I shove her damp panties aside and drive two fingers deep inside her pussy, circling the tip of my thumb on her hard clit. With her slick heat coating my hand, I plunder her mouth, rubbing my tongue against hers and exploring her mouth with renewed hunger as I feel her walls clench around my fingers.
She whimpers, giving away how overcome she is. The moment I feel her hand mimic mine, grabbing my hair at the back of my head and holding firm, I lose all coherent thought.
I hold her lips to mine, not missing the widening of her eyes as her body trembles. She starts to pant into my mouth, the short gushes of warm breath between us mixing together as we rebreathe for each other, our lips not parting once. Her pupils shine in the dim light, wide and dilated, and I realize that she’s actually getting as turned on by this as I am.
How the fuck is this possible?
The high hits me, endorphins rushing through my body, then I feel rather than see Lucia’s body grow tense, her eyes growing impossibly large as we watch each other, our mouths fused together as we rush toward the anticipated mutual climax we’re striving for.
With my mind bending and the million thoughts rushing through my head at what this could possibly mean, I don’t have the time to ponder anything. My lack of focus enables a true freeing of the mind and body.
The throbbing at the base of my cock explodes and I’m catapulted sky-high, my shaft pulsating as I growl out the most powerful release I’ve ever had. Pressing down hard with my thumb on her clit, I drive my fingers deep. She clenches tight around me and screams out her climax into our fused mouths. My head spins in the most intensely satisfying way as we come back down to earth. Her hand slows down its strokes, my hand matching her rhythm until I ease back and our lips part.
She looks at me, really looks at me. Her face is a picture of sated beauty, with flushed cheeks and swollen lips. Well fucked and well kissed. A beautiful look on any woman, and simply stunning on Lucia.
“Wow,” she whispers, her hand releasing my cock and moving to my bare hip. I look down at our bodies, mine almost naked next to her fully-clothed one. With one last soft stroke over her sensitized clit, earning me a gratifying shudder, I shift her panties back in place and move my hand from beneath her dress.
“I’m sor—“
She puts her finger on my lips. “Don’t. That was the single most erotic moment of my life. You let your walls down; you gave me a piece of yourself, and I’m not giving it back, Cal. I felt it and you felt it. Well . . .” she smirks, “until you couldn’t take it any longer.”
I can’t help but chuckle and shake my head, her finger not once leaving my bottom lip.
“I think my job is done here.”
“Something was done here,” I retort with a smirk.
“Funny, Mr. Alexander. Anyone would think you were actually relaxed.”
“Shh, don’t tell anyone. It’ll ruin my reputation.”
“And we wouldn’t want that now, would we?” She laughs before bending down to pick up my pants. Not that I’m bothered by the fact I’m still naked from the waist down. It’s then that I notice I’ve ruined the front of her dress.
“Shit. Wait there.” She frowns in confusion but doesn’t move, apparently oblivious. I pull my pants up and button them as I walk toward the kitchen, grabbing a hand towel and running it under warm water before returning to the balcony.
She then watches in shock as I bend down and pat her dress down with the cloth before standing up straight in front of her.
I sense a change in her body language, telling me that I’ve surprised her with the gesture, and I’m not sure that she knows what to think of it.
My suspicions are confirmed when I see her look at the silver watch on her wrist and frown before looking up at me. “I should really be going.”
When she brushes past me I act on instinct, wrapping my fingers around her wrist and gently tugging her body back toward me until we’re chest to chest. I run one hand down her spine to the edge of her dress and drag my fingers up until they’re cupping her ass cheek. My other hand cradles her chin, my eyes dropping to watch as I brush my thumb over her wet bottom lip.
“Stay,” I say quietly, my voice guttural and raw. Lifting my eyes to hers, I watch as she first watches my thumb before hooded eyes meet mine again. “Stay the night with me, Luce.”
“I thought you’d want me to go. I was trying to make it easy on you.”
My heart thumps in my chest at the realization that she thought I wanted her to leave.
“I don’t want you to leave. We’re not finished tonight,” I add with a wry smile.
The fist that’s been threatening to squeeze that last breath out of me all night clenches. My breathing is tight as I wait for her answer.
She hesitates for just a second, her eyes scanning my face, studying me before she nods and smiles, then confirms her decision with a quick brush of her lips against mine.
Something has shifted between Lucia and I. Something I want to explore.
Something that scares the living shit out of me.
I open my eyes to a sun-filled bedroom, freezing in place when the bed moves behind me.
It wasn’t a dream.
Lucia’s soft, warm body nuzzles into my back. Her small satin-smooth hand glides over the middle of my spine and around my chest while she places soft kisses on my shoulder, rubbing her cheek against my skin as she goes.
“Morning.” Her gravelly sex-filled voice makes my hard-on throb and demand attention despite the scattered senses holding me back.
Now it’s morning, the haze of lust is no longer clouding my perspective.
Last night was a turning point for me—for us. We have to talk today. I need to gauge her thoughts on whatever this is that’s building between us and ascertain what she wants moving forward. All I know is I haven’t felt so affected by a woman, so utterly confused and conflicted at the same time as being aroused and alive¸ in a very long time, if ever.
Rolling over toward her, I lower my head to hers. I ease my tongue into her mouth as I push her onto her back. Resting my weight against her supple flesh, my forearms lie on either side of her head as my hands tangle in her hair. Our kiss is soft and slow, full of exploration and discovery. There is no rush to be anywhere, no worry about being interrupted, and no desire on my part to ever get out of this bed.
I raise my head, regretfully pulling my lips away from her swollen delectable ones and smile down at her as my hands run over her cheeks to cup her face. “Good morning.”
“That was a very thorough way to say good morning”
“And what do you think about the direction I’m taking?”
“Oh, the direction you’re heading in is perfectly fine. In fact, it seems we’ve reached an unexpected stop sign that no longer requires your adherence.”
Smiling down at her, I find myself loving the mischievous gleam in her eye. The one she gets when she’s teasing me, and she’s not afraid to show me she’s enjoying every minute of it—as am I.
“Do you have plans for the day?” I ask, as my fingers caress her temples in slow methodical circles. She closes her eyes and moans as her fingers bite into my shoulders.
“Hmmm.”
“A bit distracted there, Luce?”
“Your hands are too damn good. Where have you been hiding all my life?”
I can’t help it. With the mask left shattered downstairs, I no longer feel bound to keep up appearances. At this juncture, if Lucia didn’t like what she saw, she wouldn’t be lying in my arms and in my bed right now. I need to move past the circumspect existence I’ve been abiding by in order to move forward.
“What was that look?” Luce asks quietly, snapping my eyes back to hers.
“What look?”
She lifts her hands to my face and gently traces my frowning brows until her fingers meet between them. “That look. It was like a dark shadow crossed your door then disappeared just as quick.” Her eyes scan my face slowly. “It’s rather disconcerting when you’re lying naked beneath a man whose beautiful face is marred with a frown. So again I ask, what was that look about?” Her voice is determined and forceful, leaving me with no doubt that she wants an answer and preferably the truth.
Can I trust my instincts to discuss this openly and honestly? Something I haven’t done with anyone other than Grant and even then, that was a fair few years ago when we’d both had copious amounts of tequila and were lying drunk on a Mexican beach? Do I really want to take the risk of disgusting her with my truth, the forbidden desires I’ve held for so long? Or worse still, face the threat that these very desires pose if they were to be made public?
“I’m finding myself off my game when it comes to you.”
Her fingers twitch against my cheek and her eyes widen slightly. “Really?” Her eyes flutter as she starts to shut down, and I fear that the small insight into my vulnerability has changed her opinion of me. “Look, I know I kind of took over last night, but there is no way I was ever in control. I know that, Callum.”
My lips curl up. “Beautiful Lucia, control is never an issue between you and I. And last night, you blew my mind—”
The adorable grin returns. “Among other things . . .”
That sense of humor of hers, the mischievous gleam in her eye telling me she’s enjoying this causes a full, beaming grin to make an appearance. “Yes, among other things.” I take a deep breath and shift to the side, not wanting the full weight of my body to lean against hers.
“Breathe, Cal. You can talk to me. You can trust me.”
I study her, but there is nothing except sincerity written all over her face. “I’m starting to believe that.”
“Then let me in. That guard you have has been missing in action since last night, and I like it. I want to get to know the man behind the face, behind the papers, the reputation, and the profile. I want to get to know you.”
“Few people get to know the real me.” My voice is wistful as I look up and stare out the window, distracting myself with the bright blue cloudless sky. Luce’s fingers twitching on my cheek draw my attention back to her.
“I’m sensing that too.” Her fingers roam my face, gently touching, tracing the lines and contours. Her eyes never once leave mine, silently encouraging me to reveal more of myself.
“I’ve always been a private person. There are some parts of me it’s safer to keep to myself.”
“Like last night?”
I nod, the words clogged in my throat. How am I supposed to tell her what I fantasize about? How am I to know she won’t freeze beneath me and flee? “I—”
“There are boundaries you want to push?”
Clearing my throat, I carefully calculate what I want to say so that there can be no misinterpretation or miscommunication. “Yes. That is one way to describe it.”
“Are you a dominant? Do you need control?”
Lifting my spare hand up, I reach behind and grab my neck, rubbing it with my fingers when the muscles start to tighten up. Releasing the long, slow, deep breath I’d been holding in, I think about what I can say and how I can say it. “I like it. But I don’t need it. Not in the way you think. It’s hard to articulate.”
“You articulate just fine, Cal. You’re not going to have me running for the hills.”
“You sure about that?”
“Are you some hardcore sadist that dreams of inflicting infinite amounts of pain on me?”
“Fuck no.”
“Let me tell you what I think. Last night only served to commit me further to the cause of shattering that glass box you surround yourself with.”
“Is that so?” My voice is tight. The fear of falling deeper and harder for this woman only to have her shy away when the attention, the pressure, the all-encompassing battle of wills that is my life, is almost too much to bear. Having just found someone so in tune with me, what kind of man would I be to bring her into my world unprepared? This is exactly why I have a need for the glass box, as she puts it.
“And I’m guessing you’ve woken up wondering if firstly, we were drunk last night and that’s why I’m still here in your bed or secondly, if I’m still here, what could I possibly think about the way you let me take control and how you let go of the tight rein you have on your instincts and just went with it. Am I close?”
I roll over, unable to resist the urge to run my knuckles over the curve of her shoulder and along her arm, answering her question with my touch.
“Then let me ask you this. Why are you so reserved?”
“What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?” I clear my throat to hide my discomfort. Looking in her eyes, I can see no malice there, nothing but sincerity.
“It’s the Lucia Inquisition. It’s done naked in bed and it’s far more comfortable.” Her tone stays light and teasing.
I watch her, and her soft green eyes are full of understanding. There is no judgment or disgust in her expression. She genuinely wants to know what is going on. I decide that honesty is the best policy. “It’s safer.”
“For whom?” she quickly asks, not giving me an inch.
“Me. The women I choose to be involved with . . .”
“And am I now a woman you’re choosing to involve yourself with?” One of her hands runs over my arm, her touch acting as a salve.
“After last night, I damn well hope so.” I instinctually find myself pressing my body into her more to reiterate my answer. I roll on top of her body, bracing my forearms on either side of her head to take some of my weight off her. She reaches up and snakes her hands through my hair, tangling her fingers through the wayward strands.
“Then I think it’s safe to say that you need to open the door to that box and let me in there with you.”
“And then what happens?”
“Then together . . .” She gently tightens her fingers and pulls my temple down to rest against her forehead, her voice dropping to a soft whisper,“ . . . we ride this wave and take whatever comes. Whatever caused you to be so tense last night, whatever the outside pressures are that you’re trying and failing to deal with, we’ll do it while also getting to know each other and building the necessary trust so we can further pursue whatever it is you’re trying so hard to protect me from.”
I grin up at her. “You’re rather assertive when you set your mind to something. But you have to know, I’m not easygoing. I haven’t let a woman get close before.”
“Then I’m glad you’re giving me a shot at getting in there,” she says with a sigh. “Why are you so worried, Cal? You’re one of the most put-together men I have ever met. It’s what I know is hiding underneath the hard exterior that has had me intrigued from the start.”
“Are you sure you’re willing to deal with everything that comes along with the Callum Alexander name? The publicity? The gossip? The events? The—”
Her finger presses against my lips, halting my diatribe. “I’m willing to do it for you.”
“Is that the same thing?”
“It’s far better. I’m doing it for you, not because of you. There’s a distinct difference.”
“I don’t want to hurt you. I couldn’t bear that.”
“Then trust me to tell you when and if we reach a line I’m not willing to cross. But I’ll tell you now, Cal. There are many lines out there, and I haven’t met one yet that has stopped me. I’ve been hoping you’d realize that.”
I watch as a sly smile creeps over her face and her hands drop from my hair, stretching up above her head. My eyes drift down and watch as her breasts are pulled up along with them. “Now, I’m all for heavy in the morning, but that’s after at least one orgasm and good coffee. Think you can help me out with that, since we both agree that I’m now the woman you’re involved with?” I’m met with a smirk that has my previously felt apprehension leaching out of me.
“I’d hate to think I’m failing at my hosting duties. I best get right on that.” I lower my head and circle her offered nipple with my tongue before trailing kisses up her throat and brushing my lips across hers, her mouth chasing mine as I tease her.
An hour later, I’m upstairs enjoying breakfast and coffee on the balcony with a smiling and sated woman by my side, my nagging concerns muted for now, but I know that in letting Lucia into the fold, the one that I’ve never experienced and only Grant knows about, I’m taking on one of the biggest risks of my life.
I can only hope that the choice I’ve made is the right one.
