Текст книги "Fall For Me"

Автор книги: Alexis Noelle

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Chapter Four

Carter

Why the hell am I so upset? I barely know the girl and she has a boyfriend. The thing is, I know I wasn’t imagining things. There is something between us, and it has been the first real thing I’ve felt in a while. I know that fucker Chris is the one who is behind this. I steal a glance at her during class every chance I can. Luckily, she never catches me.

When she sits down in English, she winces like she’s been hurt and I wonder what it’s about. I know that Chris has a reputation of getting rough with people and I heard a friend of mine saying he hit one of his sister’s friends. I need to catch her outside and talk to her.

I am packed up and ready to leave five minutes before the bell rings. I need to catch Maddy and talk to her. The professor dismisses us and I race out the door. I want to be waiting for her. I see her leave and step up beside her. “I need to talk to you.” The look on her face is unreadable, but she seems sad.

“Why? I thought I pretty much said everything I needed to this morning.”

Ouch. “Five minutes?”

“Okay…” she hesitates, “what?”

How do I even ask this? “Are you okay? You seemed upset when you walked in. I saw you when you sat down and you seemed like you were in pain. Did something happen? “

I can see in her eyes that something is wrong. “Carter, I’m fine, but I need to go now.” I let her go, but I have this nagging feeling that something is wrong.

*  *  *

Maddy stays away from me for the next couple of months. Every time I try to get close to her, she will run or duck into one of the classrooms. I have tried to go out and have fun with my friends, but I can’t shake this feeling. Even the guys notice that something is up with me. I don’t understand why I can’t get her out of my system.

“Carter, listen, we get that you like this girl, but it’s like November; time to move on.” Shawn is looking at me, but he just doesn’t get it.

None of us were really the relationship kind. We went out, had a good time and sometimes went home with girls, but it had never been with someone long-term. The first day I met Maddy, she was smiling and had that adorable sundress on. But after that, all she wore were jeans and long sleeves, even when it was warm out. I had a feeling that asshole was hurting her, but she wouldn’t talk to me. I know I’m jumping to conclusions and that I probably sound crazy but I know in my gut that I’m right.

“Listen, I get what you’re saying, but I know something isn’t right and I’m not gonna give up on her. I know you guys don’t get it, but I’ve never felt this connection with any girl I’ve met. She’s been ignoring me for almost two months, but I still find myself looking for her everywhere. I find excuses to talk to her in class. You know me and I’m not one to chase girls, but even that one day of being around her changed that. She’s different and I feel different whenever I’m around her, even when she’s ignoring me.”

Jason laughs at me. “Carter, you just met this girl! You don’t even know her that well. Maybe you just need to get laid and get her out of your system.”

That is what I would’ve done before, but it isn’t going to work this time. I’ve tried to forget Maddy. I went home with girls, but I just wasn’t interested.

I don’t know how to explain it to them, but in the couple hours I spent with Maddy, she got to me. I’ve never met a girl like her, and I don’t want to let her go. I have a feeling that she wants me too, but something is holding her back.

Chapter Five

Madison

Carter is killing me. I’m worried that he knows what is going on. I don’t know how, but he does. I am getting so tired of having to run and hide from him.

Things with Chris haven’t been any better, either. He gets mad about every little thing. If it isn’t the clothes I wear, it is the fact that I am looking at all the football players when he takes me to the game. I am forced to wear long clothes, even if it is hot outside, so no one can see the bruises. Sometimes, I think about leaving him but, the truth is, I am scared of what he’d do.

It is like he has this switch in him that just flips and a whole different person takes over. If I am being honest, that person scares the hell out of me.

I’m sitting in English class right now, trying my best not to look over at Carter, even though I can feel his eyes on me. The professor is talking about a project that will be due before Thanksgiving break and that we’ll be working in pairs.

My only thought is please don’t put me with him. God can’t be that cruel. He tells us to pair off and everything happens so fast. Everybody is scrambling to get into their pairs and I am looking around for someone to ask.

I see a guy coming up to me and I know he is going to ask me. But before he reaches me, he gets this fearful look on his face and asks the girl two rows over.

I glance behind me and Carter is standing there. He looks down at me and gives me that smile. Kill...me...now.

Our professor goes on to talk about the details of the assignment. We have to do a study on the student body at the university. We need to come up with questions to ask, do surveys, and turn that into a ten page paper and a presentation. Carter couldn’t have possibly looked more pleased with himself.

My stomach drops. Chris is going to flip out. He didn’t believe me when I told him I never talk to Carter anymore. He hit me last week because he said I was looking at him when we were eating lunch, even though I wasn’t. He’ll never believe me when I tell him I didn’t choose to partner with Carter.

“Well, we have two weeks before this is due so when do you want to get started and plan it out?” The project is due right before Thanksgiving break, not that I’d be doing anything other than sitting in my dorm during break. “If you want to come over tonight, I don’t have work.”

Come over? As in to his house? Oh, hell no! I get hit if I glance at a guy, there’s no telling what Chris would do if he found out I was at Carter’s  house. Not only that, but with the way Carter makes me feel, us being alone at his house is a horrible idea. What can I say to him? Sorry, I can’t come over to your house because I’m extremely attracted to you and I don’t trust myself? Sorry, I can’t come over because my boyfriend is extremely jealous and will flip his shit?

“Okay, that sounds great!” Did I really just say that? What the hell am I thinking? I look up at Carter and he is smiling at me in the way that made it hard to breathe.

“Okay, I’ll see you tonight then. Do you want to give me your number so I can text you the address?”

My number? Oh, he thinks I’m one of those normal college students and that I have a cell phone. “Sorry, I don’t have a phone.” To say he looks shocked would be an understatement.

A cell phone required not only money, but people that you want to talk to and I had neither. Well, maybe I had one person that I want to talk to, but that is a bad idea.

“Um…okay. Well, here then.” He pulls out a piece of paper and scribbles his address on it.

“Okay…I’ll see you tonight.” A tinge of nervousness mixed with excitement runs through me.

Chris is waiting for me when I walk out of English and as soon as Carter comes out behind me, Chris’ expression hardens. I know I am in for it but, at this point, it can’t get any worse.

Carter looks at Chris, smiles, then looks at me. “See you tonight, Maddy.”

Shit, just got worse. My whole body tenses and I feel like I am going to be sick. I can literally feel the anger radiating off of Chris. Carter doesn’t know what he is doing. He thinks it is all a game, but he has no idea.

I am used to the drill by now. Chris takes me to my room and locks the door. I turn so my back is to him and brace myself for what I know is coming. He comes up behind me and starts kissing my neck. What is he doing? I hear him undoing his belt. The sound makes every hair on my body stand on its end. I hope he doesn’t think I am ready to have sex right now. I don’t know if I ever will be. That is when I feel his belt slap against my side. I fall to the floor from the impact.

“Why the fuck are you going to his house tonight? Do you still want to be one of his whores? I can make you a whore just as easily.”

“We have a project for English, Chris. I swear I didn’t pick him. We were the last two left after everyone had paired off.” I sit on the floor, waiting for him to hit me with it again, but nothing comes. I turn around to see what is going on. He is standing there in front of me with his pants and boxers down, just looking at me. I stiffen as I realize things are about to get a whole lot worse.

“If you are going to act like a little whore for anyone, it will be for me! Do you understand me?” I nod my head. What does he want from me?

“I’m the one that puts up with you. Do you really think someone like him is going to want to deal with all your shit, especially when you don’t put out? We aren’t going to have sex right now so stop looking at me like that, but don’t think I’m going to wait much longer. Now, you’re going to suck my dick until I come in that virgin mouth of yours. Then when you’re with him tonight, you’ll remember who you belong to. Got it?”

I nodded my head. This can’t be happening. I am not ready for this. My first time shouldn’t be something unwanted, something forced. The minute he puts it in my mouth, I start to cry. He warns me to stop or he will make it so I can’t show my face tonight. I try to think of happy things to make this less painful, but I honestly don’t have too many good memories to use. After what seems like an eternity, Chris finishes in my mouth. I run to the bathroom down the hall hoping no one notices my appearance, and throw up until I have nothing left in me.

When I go back, my roommate Nicole is there. She takes one look at me and I swear, somehow, she knows. Chris doesn’t like me hanging out with her because he says she is too nosy for her own good. I change and get ready to go to Carter’s house, although I don’t know how I am going to face him now.

Chapter Six

Carter

Knock knock

Maddy must be here. I walk to the door and my heart starts beating faster. When I open it, the look on her face stops me in my tracks. What the heck happened to her? She looks presentable on the outside, but I can see the pain in her eyes. What is she hiding?

“Hey, come in.” She walks into my house, and it feels so good to have her here. “I made dinner because I figured you’d be hungry. I hope ravioli is okay. It is the one thing I’m half-decent at making.”

She smiled at me. “That was really nice of you, Carter, thank you.”

I make us plates and we sit down at the table. I try to make small talk, but all I am getting are one-word answers.

She looks up at me. “So, what topic do you think we should do the project on?” That is so not what I want to talk about right now, but at least she is talking to me. “I’m thinking we could do a study on tuition rates and whether students feel that what they’re paying is fair. We can ask them about all of the different fees. Maybe even see if they’re aware of all of them. I also think we should try to find out if they feel they’re getting what they pay for.”

“I really like that idea. If you want, I can type up a sample survey and email it to you. You can change anything you need to. Then we can pick a day next week and survey random students.”

“Okay, that sounds good.” She takes her plate to the kitchen, washes it off and sticks it in the dishwasher. I see her going for her coat. She can’t leave yet, she just got here.

“Maddy, please don’t go yet.”

“Why, Carter? We both know I shouldn’t be here. You know you didn’t need to taunt Chris like that earlier, either.”

Just hearing her say that asshole’s name pisses me off. I know Chris because he used to come up here to party with some of his friends last year. He had a habit of running his mouth. In fact, he and Jason almost got into a fight. I just don’t get what she sees in him. I’ve seen him with other girls when he visited campus and he was an asshole to them. I’m not a saint and admit to having my share of girls¸ but I always treat them with respect.

“Listen, I know I acted like an asshole and I’m sorry. It just drives me crazy that you’re with him, Maddy. I can see that you’re not happy. Where is that girl I met the first day who had that great smile? You never smile when you’re with him and that’s a damn shame because you have a beautiful smile.”

I see the blush creeping up her face and, before I know what I am doing, I go over to her and kiss her. Her lips are just as soft as I imagined they’d be. She gasps and I take advantage, slipping my tongue into her mouth. I can tell she isn’t experienced, but it doesn’t matter. This is the best kiss I’ve ever had. She pulls away suddenly, grabs her jacket, and runs for the door. I catch up with her, grabbing her arm in an attempt to convince her to stay. “Maddy, please stay.”

“Carter, I can’t do this. I’m with someone else!” Her voice escalates.

“I know you are and I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” Yes, I do. I’m falling for her. Fuck, where did that come from? How can I be falling for someone who doesn’t even want me? “Listen, I know he was probably mad about you coming here tonight. But you’re already here, so as long as I promise not to kiss you again, will you hang out?”

“Carter, I don’t know. If I do, you have to promise me that won’t happen again.” Her words and her face tell a different story. I can see that she didn’t hate the kiss as much as she wants me to think.

“I do. Now come sit down.” I just want her here, even if I have to pretend like I don’t want her.

She seems so uncomfortable now and I am pissed at myself for making it that way. “Your house is really nice. You mentioned earlier you had off work. What do you do?”

“I’m a bouncer at Rebellion.” By the blank expression on her face, I guess that she’d never heard of it. “It’s a club downtown. I’m guessing you’ve never been there?”

“No, I don’t really go out much.”

If she were my girl, I’d take her out all the time. It makes me sick that she is with that asshole. We watch TV for about an hour. Some comedy is on and she is laughing at it. I miss hearing that sound. I miss just being around her.

She turned to face me. “So, tell me about your family?”

“Well, I told you my mom passed away. After that, it was just me, my dad, my brother, and sister. Holly is seventeen and Anthony is fifteen. What about your family?”

Her face drops like she didn’t expect me to return the question. She seems to be looking anywhere but at me. “Listen, Carter, I had fun, but I really need to go. I have to study.”

What did I say? Why is she all of a sudden telling me she needs to study? I wonder why asking about her family upset her so much. I want to ask her, but I don’t think she is ready to tell me anything. “Okay, let me give you a ride home.”

“No, it’s okay. I will-”

“Come on, I’m taking you home.” She reluctantly goes outside and gets into my car. The car ride is short and in no time I am pulling up to her dorm. I get out of the car and walk over to her side.

“You don’t need to walk me in. I’ll be fine.,” she says, as she closes the door and looks up at me.

I run my hands up her arms, stopping at her shoulders, before trailing them back down. “It’s okay, I want to.”

She nods her head. When we get to her door, she is about to unlock it when her roommate opens it. I recognize her. She is in one of my afternoon classes.

I give Maddy a hug. It feels so good to have her pressed against me that I don’t want to let go. She pulls away first, but the look in her eyes lets me know I’m not the only one feeling it.

“Thank you for tonight, Carter. I’ll see you in class.”

The door shuts and my determination to make her mine is stronger than ever.

Chapter Seven

Madison

When Carter kissed me tonight, I did something I’d said I’d never do again-I let someone in. I didn’t want to and it scares me, but it was inevitable. I wish everything happened differently. I wish Chris didn’t want me and that I could be free to be with Carter.

Chris has been getting especially paranoid lately, telling me that I can never leave him. If I did, he’d find me and he’d make sure that me and whoever I left him for would pay. I can’t bring Carter into this.

I walk down to the bathroom to get ready for bed, trying to push thoughts of Carter out of my mind. Nicole is watching me when I come back, and I lay down, trying to pretend that she isn’t. I feel like she can see through all of my bullshit.

“So, Carter James, huh? I’m glad you finally came to your senses and told that abusive asshole to take a hike.”

What did she just say? Shock runs through me as my spine stiffens. No one knew. This can’t be happening. “What are you talking about? Carter and I are just friends.”

“Listen, girl, I went to high school with Carter. He isn’t ‘just friends’ with girls. And he sure as hell never walked a girl to her door, unless he was going in. Even then, he’d leave once they were done. Don’t fool yourself. That boy likes you and if I didn’t see it with my own eyes, I wouldn’t have believed it.”

She doesn’t know what she is talking about. Sure, Carter kissed me, but I’m sure he’s with a lot of girls. He probably assumed by me coming over to his house that he was going to get some. Chris is right. He just sees me as one of his whores. I feel a tear roll down my face. Why the hell am I crying when Carter and I weren’t even together?

“As for Chris, you need to get out while you can. I know you think you hide it well and you do, but I live here and I see everything. I don’t know why you’re with him when he does that to you and treats you the way he does. You may not think you deserve better, but you do. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.”

She lies down and starts reading her book again. How would she know I deserve better? I barely ever talk to her. As much as I hate to admit it to myself, I am looking forward to spending time with Carter on this project, even though with my luck, he is probably only trying to use me. Why the hell would Carter James want anything from me? Chris is probably right, he just wants to use me and then throw me away. No matter how much I try to convince myself of this, though, there’s still a little part of me hoping that he wants something more.

“Hey, Mads?”

There goes another nickname and, truthfully, I don’t mind that one either. “Yeah?”

“Just so you know, if you’re not ready to make a decision yet, what he doesn’t know won’t hurt you.”

“What do you mean?”

“Chris, what he doesn’t know won’t piss him off. So do what you want.”

Nicole may have just given me the best, and the worst, advice ever.

*  *  *

When I walk into class Friday morning, there was an open seat next to Carter so I decided to sit down next to him. He looks over at me like he is confused and surprised at the same time. Shit, did he not want me to sit here? I am contemplating moving seats when he gives me one of those smiles and I know I made the right choice.

If I am going to do this, I have to do it before I chicken out. I rip a piece of notebook paper out and scribble a note down on it.

Remember how you said you worked as a spy? I enjoyed our night together the other night and I like being around you. I’d like to do it more often, if you can keep it a secret.

I debate whether or not to give it to him. I pass it to Carter the way I used to watch all the girls do it in high school.

He opens it cautiously, then smiles before writing something back, handing it to me. I open it up and exhale a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

Are you suggesting that we sneak around? Cause if you are, I’m in.

When I read his reply, I smile so hard that my face hurts. When I turn to look at Carter, I can tell that he’s been watching me and I feel the blush he always causes creep up my neck.

When class is over, he waits for me and we walk to our next one together. “So, why the sudden change of heart?”

“I don’t know. I like talking to you and I had fun the other night. However, Chris doesn’t want me hanging out with you, and I thought that what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” Or me. “But only if that’s okay with you, and I understand if it isn’t.”

“Hey, listen, I’ll take what I can get here.”

I smile as he accepts my offer.

Things just might be turning around.