Текст книги "Truth Or Dare"
Автор книги: Aimee McNeil
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Текущая страница: 17 (всего у книги 20 страниц)
“I don’t know the history you and Ashton share. I know that it hasn’t been easy for either one of you. You are one of the strongest people I know. You just have to decide how hard you’re willing to fight.”
They both turned toward the door as it swung open and Ashton stood there filling the frame of the door. He was out of breath but looked relieved when his eyes fell on Sophie next to Margaret’s bed.
“Let me explain…please.” Ashton walked up to her, kneeling in front of her.
“Wait.” Sophie placed her hand on his shoulder. She could feel his shoulders tense, unsure of her intentions. “Will you come outside with me?” she asked. He stood and reached for her hand. She let him take it.
“Of course.” He pulled her hand up to kiss it. His contact made the tears sting her eyes because this would be the last time she held his hand. Being close to him made it impossible to think clearly, to know what was best.
“Goodbye, Margaret. I’ll call you later,” Sophie managed. Margaret only offered a gentle nod. Sophie knew it was because Margaret knew where Sophie’s thoughts were.
Sophie led him down the hall to a group of chairs that were away from any commotion, giving them privacy. She sat down and waited for him to take the seat beside her. She looked into his beautiful blue eyes that were full of questions. She would have loved the opportunity to stare into them every day for the rest of her life but it was not meant to be. Sophie leaned over and kissed his lips softly. She pulled away when he reached up to pull her close. “This is my goodbye.”
Ashton grabbed her hand. “Don’t do this.” He was desperate and it tore at her already broken heart. “I didn’t know she was going to kiss me. It didn’t mean anything.”
“You have no idea what high school was like for me. From my first day I was basically shunned by everyone. No one would talk to me because of lies that Lucinda and you spread. It doesn’t matter why you did it. It hurt, every moment of every day was painful for me because no one would even talk to someone that Lucinda and you hated for fear that they would be turned on as well. I thought I could get past it, and what we shared was wonderful…but seeing you and Lucinda together again, not once but twice, made me realize that it still hurts too much. I can’t do this. I don’t want to hurt like that again. We shouldn’t be together, this was a mistake. How could we ever have expected a happy ever after to come from something that was born of so much hatred?”
“No…don’t,” Ashton begged.
“It doesn’t matter why you were with her, Ashton. It doesn’t change the fact that I don’t love you.” Sophie couldn’t bring herself to look at him.
“No. Don’t say that,” he pleaded.
“Goodbye, Ashton…just forget about me. We will both be better off.” Sophie pulled her hand from his and walked away. She wasn’t strong enough to stay any longer. She knew the words she spoke were a lie. She now believed in love. Her heart loved him with a desperation that scared her and she needed to break free of the hold before it destroyed her. Walking away from him was the hardest thing she had ever done. She could feel his eyes on her like a weight. She walked past the bus stop and kept going; she didn’t want to stop. She walked until her feet hurt and the sun began to set. She avoided all the people that passed her by. She could tell they watched her, could see her pain written all over her. She didn’t stop until she saw her apartment building cast in the glow of the streetlight. She entered her apartment. Closing the door, she dropped her purse and shoes and headed toward her bed, where she crawled in without a word.
The tears began anew now that she was in the comfort of her bed. The smell of Ashton lingered on her pillows. She sobbed as the empty ache in her chest tightened its hold. She was too late. She hadn’t stopped herself before she hit bottom.
Sophie felt the bed shift as Mel crawled in and wrapped her arm around her. Mel didn’t speak a word; Sophie was grateful because there was no way that she would be able to respond. Sophie let herself drift off into a restless sleep because she had come undone.
The next morning the sun was harsh as its light flooded her apartment, taunting her and trying to lure her from sleep. Sophie pulled the pillow over her head and refused to wake to the world. Mel had risen with the beginning of the day and was trying to be quiet as she shuffled around the apartment and left. Sophie got up and closed all the windows, pulling the curtains tight to block out the sunshine before climbing back in bed.
Sophie slipped in and out of sleep as she tossed and turned under her covers, hiding from the world. The idea of getting up and facing the fact she needed to put herself back together was too much. She waited for the pain to fade but it held on so tight it made it hard to breathe.
Sophie wasn’t sure what time it was when Mel came back into her apartment. Sophie didn’t bother to open her eyes. “Your mom called me. She left a couple of messages this morning and got worried when you didn’t return them.” Mel’s voice was thick with concern.
“Please tell me you didn’t say anything.” Sophie’s voice was dry from thirst.
“I couldn’t help it. She has this way of getting information out. She’s sneaky, but all I said was that you weren’t feeling good. You should call her. She’ll drive out here if you don’t confirm you’re still alive. I think I still freak your mother out a bit.” Mel reached up and pulled the blanket down, brushing Sophie’s hair from her face. Sophie could see the worry creasing Mel’s features. “I’m only giving you this one day to mope. That’s all you get but you still have to call your mother and let her know I didn’t kill you and cut you up into tiny pieces.”
“Okay,” Sophie whispered. Mel grabbed her phone and passed it to her before she went to retrieve a glass of water to sit on Sophie’s nightstand.
“Drink this,” she demanded.
Sophie looked at her phone and noticed her mother’s missed calls, not to mention a call from Margaret and many from Ashton. He had left many text messages as well. A message from Ashton used to excite her but now they only made her sad. She was surprised how late the hour was as the day was already fading into night.
Ashton: I’m sorry.
Ashton: I need to talk to you.
Ashton: Call me please.
Ashton: You don’t need to love me. I just want to be with you.
Sophie couldn’t read anymore. She erased all of the messages from Ashton before she called her mother.
“Mom?”
“Honey, I was worried about you. Mel told me you weren’t feeling well.”
“I’m okay. Mel is taking care of me. Are you still coming this week to try on your dress?” Sophie didn’t want to broach the topic of why she wasn’t feeling well because she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold herself together.
“I was hoping to come tomorrow. Does that work for you?” Her mother had a cautious tone, like she was trying to read between the lines.
“Perfect.” Sophie forced some enthusiasm into her voice. She wasn’t sure if her mother believed her or not.
“Okay…how are you feeling now?”
“Better. I should be as good as new tomorrow.”
“Good, and I want you to tell me all you have been up to. Do you need anything?”
“No, I’m good.”
“Tomorrow then. Love you.”
“Love you too, Mom.” When Sophie pressed end and let the forced pleasantry for her mother’s benefit melt away, she was left with her overwhelming sadness.
Mel was good and let Sophie stay in her bed for the rest of the evening but the morning came entirely too fast and she still did not feel ready.
Chapter
Twenty-Six
Mel pulled back the covers. “Noooo,” Sophie moaned.
“I told you I would give you yesterday to sulk around and not get out of bed but now it’s a new day.” Mel walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower before she grabbed Sophie’s toothbrush and slathered it in an obscene amount of toothpaste. “Here. Brush your stank teeth and wash your stank body so we can go out and grab some breakfast while I tell you what John said when he called this morning. He had some important information about a certain business that we’re trying to start.”
“Okay, Mom,” Sophie moaned sarcastically before she rolled out of bed.
“Did you just make a joke? Thank the lord she isn’t completely lost to me!” Mel cried out dramatically.
The hot water soothed Sophie as it ran over her; it did not wash away her sadness but it gave her enough to conjure the strength to get dressed and start the day. Sophie couldn’t help but smile when Mel blasted “Single Ladies” by Beyoncé. It made her want to be happy again but the road seemed so long. Mel hadn’t pressed for details but she knew it was only a matter of time. She just hoped she would be ready.
Sophie stared at her reflection in the mirror. The dark circles under her eyes spoke of her inner torment. Her face seemed strange to her, her skin looked pale and her lips were dry. She powdered her face with some color and rubbed some gloss over her lips, hoping it would disguise her emotions that seemed to seep through her skin.
***
Sophie looked at her plate of food. She was hungry but the food didn’t taste like it should. It left an aftertaste in her mouth that made it hard to swallow. She realized her broken heart affected every part of her body. She felt like a stranger in her own skin. It was a version of herself that she didn’t care for. She fought the urge to call Ashton and beg him to take her back. Though, if it hurt this much only after their short time together, she wondered if she could survive when he would grow tired of their relationship and leave, like so many men had left her mother over the years. Flames eventually burnt out. I wish I could go back to my safe boring life when Ashton was in the past and I was wonderfully sane. At least I think I do…
Sophie tried not to think about Ashton and Lucinda and the way things looked in the coffee shop. Do I believe Ashton? Should I believe him? Can people die from emotional turmoil? He made her feel too much and it terrified her. Am I insane? I feel like it.
“Do you want me to kick his ass? You know that I can,” Mel said bluntly as she reached over and took a hash brown off Sophie’s plate and popped it into her mouth.
“No. I just want to move on and learn from my mistake.” Sophie sighed. She pushed her plate away and leaned back in her chair.
“Was that Lucinda bitch involved, because I would love to take her down?”
“All I want is for you to tell me what John said when he called.” Sophie rested her chin in her hands.
Mel sat up straighter, a brilliant smile on her face. “John said that the investor he has been in contact with is keen on investing in our business. We just have to put a proper business proposal together and then he plans to finance it completely. John wants to meet with us to go over the details but this is perfect for us. We can get started right away. Nothing can stop us now.”
“That is amazing.” Sophie felt a real smile touch her lips. This was just what she needed to distract her. She would focus everything on establishing their company and eventually she hoped that her heart would heal.
“The more you love them the harder it is to let them go. That’s how I know I have never been in love yet because I was always glad to walk out when the time comes.”
“What about Dustin?” Sophie furrowed her brow. “I thought you guys were a thing?”
“Maybe…he wants to take it slow and see how things go.” Mel let out a long slow breath. “When I’m with him I feel really good but he’s too…”
“Safe?” Sophie added with a raised brow.
Mel smiled and shook her head. “Yeah…it’s strange for a guy not to want to jump my bones as soon as he can. It makes me question if he’s really into me. Does that seem weird?”
“You’re used to idiots, so of course it will be strange to be with someone who’s looking for more than a free ride, but you have to want to be with him for it to work.”
“I really like him and maybe that’s what’s making me nervous. I keep waiting for him to turn on me or something. He took me out to eat the other night and he didn’t expect anything in return. I’m not used to it.”
“That’s what you need and deserve, Mel. You need to get used to it. No more losers from loser town. That was the old Mel. You are now a businesswoman with standards. No more turning back now.”
Mel reached over and grabbed Sophie’s hand. “You’re the best friend in the whole world.”
“I know.” Sophie squeezed back tightly.
“We are all colors of messed up, you know. I don’t know how to recognize a good man when I see them and you’re scared to let yourself fall in love, so you run away from it even when it comes in the hottest package known to man.”
“But we’re going to make the best business partners,” Sophie encouraged.
“Damn fucking right. Let’s kick it.” Mel jumped to her feet. “We have lots of shit to do before we can start selling our cookies.” She winked.
***
Sophie felt drastically better when her mother arrived that afternoon. She knew there was no way she could hide it from her. The truth of her broken heart was written all over her.
“Sophie, darling! This is the most beautiful dress.” Her mother’s face lit up as she looked down at the dress; the fit was almost perfect as her mother spun around in front of the full height mirror in Sophie’s apartment. Her mother ran her fingers over the material and her smile shone brighter than the sun. Sophie placed a couple of pins into the material for some minor adjustments but she was very pleased how well it fit. Tears started to fall from her mother’s shining eyes. “I love you so much. This is more than I ever imagined.” She gathered Sophie in her arms and squeezed tight. “Are you going to tell me why you’re so sad?” her mother whispered in Sophie’s ear as she kept her arms secure around her shoulders. She pulled back and looked into Sophie’s eyes that were also filled with tears.
“Mom? How do you know that it is different with Peter than with all the others?” Sophie kept her hands busy fussing with her mother’s dress. When her question left her lips her mother reached for her hands.
“There are no guarantees in life but I know that my heart wants to be with him even with the risk. He makes me happy and I want to spend whatever time that I can by his side. All I can do is hope that we will have the rest of our lives together.”
“Don’t you think it would be easier not to risk it? Why would you want to give someone so much power over your life? What if your heart gets broken and you can’t put the pieces back together again?”
Her mother tucked Sophie’s hair behind her ear before lifting Sophie’s chin to look into her eyes. “It doesn’t mean that you give someone power over you. It’s opening up your heart to someone and finding a connection. To find meaning in our lives that makes us happy and stronger. I like my life with love even if it meant I had to suffer many failed attempts. If you don’t take the risk because you’re scared of getting hurt, then you could miss out on something beautiful. Our hearts are strong, even if it doesn’t always feel like it. Don’t cheat yourself because you are afraid.”
“What if I can never really forgive Ashton for what he and Lucinda did to me? What if I can’t get past it? Seeing him with Lucinda makes me feel like the vulnerable girl I was back in high school. I run as fast as I can in the opposite direction, literally. I’m just waiting for them to reveal this has been a joke the entire time but…when he looks at me I feel loved. He makes me feel alive.”
“I wish I had the answer for you. I don’t like how he treated you. I hate that he made you suffer but if you love him you have to figure out if it’s worth the risk to make it work. Eventually you have to stop running and face it. You are no longer that little girl anymore. You are a strong, independent woman. Take control of your life.”
“You’re right.” Sophie hugged her mother tightly; the comfort of her mother’s embrace was exactly what she needed. “I love you, Mom.”
“I love you too, baby girl, more than you will ever know.” Her mother held her. “You are my favorite person in this whole world and I don’t like seeing you sad.”
“I’m gonna be okay.” Sophie wiped her eyes. “I like this more mature version of you, Mom.”
“It was about time, don’t you think? I only wish I could have made the debut years ago.” Her mother squeezed her hand. “It would have helped my mothering skills.”
“I wouldn’t change a thing,” Sophie insisted. “Mel and I have some good news for you.”
“It’s about time this sappy love fest was over,” Mel piped in. Sophie laughed because she noticed Mel’s watery eyes. “And don’t worry, she’s not gonna tell you that we’re lesbian lovers.” Mel smiled evilly.
Sophie couldn’t help but laugh and her mother followed suit. Laughing felt good, she wanted to find her happiness again.
Her mother listened excitedly as the two of them told her of their business plan and the immediate plans for the cookie café. Sophie’s mother’s reaction was encouraging as she asked questions. Sophie and Mel planned to spend the rest of the day finishing the business proposal for the investor and organize the renovations that had to take place. Dustin’s brother, Christian, was a contractor and agreed to take on the project. The plumbing did not need to be altered and only minor electrical was required to acquire proper outlets for their equipment.
“And your job at the restaurant? And with Mrs. Darcy?” Sophie’s mother asked.
“I’ll give my notice at the restaurant once our financing is official and my job with Margaret is flexible.”
“I am proud of you girls. This is exciting and you seem to have all your bases covered. I hope to be your first customer.”
When Sophie’s mom left, her spirits were considerably lifted. It was nice to focus on something other than the upheaval within her heart.
Sophie and Mel spent the rest of the afternoon making phone calls to confirm their numbers before sending their final business plan to John. When they were finished, Sophie called Margaret to get an update. Margaret was excited to announce that Ashton was on the way to take her home. Sophie made plans to meet her at her house. She was planning to stay with Margaret for a couple of days until she was healed, taking a couple days off work from the restaurant. Hearing Margaret speak Ashton’s name brought an ache to her chest. She hoped that she wouldn’t run into him because she knew how difficult it would be. She wasn’t ready yet.
When Sophie arrived at Margaret’s house, she was surprised to hear so many voices coming from the sitting room. “Hello, Charlotte,” Sophie greeted as she set her bags down in the entrance way.
“Ashton’s parents are in town visiting Margaret. They’re expecting you.” Charlotte gave her an encouraging wave toward the voices.
“I don’t want to intrude. I’ll let them have their family time.”
“Nonsense. They have been looking forward to meeting the girl that Margaret and their son are always fussing about.”
“What?” Sophie suddenly felt terrified.
“Go on. I’ll put your bags in your room,” Charlotte insisted.
Sophie forced her legs to walk into the room. She was nervous to meet Ashton’s parents. Sophie suddenly wished she had worn something nicer than her favorite jeans and a pale green T-shirt, when her eyes settled on two finely dressed people. Sophie recognized them as Ashton’s parents immediately. Ashton had his father’s dominating presence with amazing bone structure, with his mother’s coloring and bright blue eyes. They turned to study Sophie as she entered. Sophie forced a pleasant smile on her face, ignoring the nerves clawing at her insides.
“Hello, Sophie,” Margaret welcomed her. She was sitting on the sofa with a blanket over her legs, resting. Sophie was relieved to see her coloring had improved even more since yesterday. Both Ashton’s parents stood up as Sophie approached. Ashton’s father extended a hand as she neared. His features reminded her of Ashton.
“Nice to meet you, Sophie. I’m Marcus and this is Bridgette. We have heard so much about you.”
“Hopefully only the good things. It’s nice to meet you too. I have grown rather fond of Margaret and you have a wonderful son as well,” Sophie offered politely. They smiled welcomingly in return.
“So you think I’m wonderful?” Ashton’s voice startled her as he approached her from behind.
“Ashton? I didn’t know you were here.” Ashton’s smell enveloped her. He leaned down and kissed his grandmother’s cheek before coming to stand next to his parents.
“I can see why Ashton is so captivated by you. You are quite the vision,” Bridgette complimented.
“Thank you, Bridgette. You are too kind.”
Sophie looked up and caught Ashton’s eyes on her. She knew that the truth was he was the one that captivated her. Her resolve was crumbling.
“Sorry to interrupt but I wanted to see if Sophie wanted this with her.” Charlotte entered the room carrying the wrapped canvas with her. “Or in her room with her bags?”
“My room is fine. Thank you, Charlotte.”
“Is that a painting? I have heard of your wonderful talent,” Bridgette asked, eyeing the large package.
Sophie felt her face heat. She hadn’t intended to make a big deal about the painting she had made for Margaret. “Yes. It’s just something I did for Margaret. I was planning on giving it to her later,” Sophie tried to dismiss nonchalantly.
“Did you paint me something?” Margaret beamed, making her appear youthful.
“Yes. I wanted to thank you for all that you have done for me,” Sophie offered nervously.
“You are so sweet.” Margaret reached for Sophie’s hand, giving her an affectionate squeeze.
“Bring it here, Charlotte,” Bridgette requested.
Sophie had to stay her fingers from twisting a hole in her shirt. Ashton looked slightly amused at her anxious behavior. Ashton leaned in next to her. “You look sexy as hell when you’re nervous.” His breath against her ear made her insides melt. She wanted to taste his lips. She was defenseless against his charms. I have to be strong! I can’t keep falling into this cycle that will have me running scared because I don’t know if Lucinda still has a claim on him. How could she protect her heart when it so willingly wanted to sacrifice itself up for slaughter, even with the memory of him and Lucinda so vivid in her mind from the coffee shop?
“Can I open it?” Margaret asked, looking at the painting excitedly.
“Oh…of course, it’s for you. You may open it whenever you like.” Sophie noted everyone’s eyes on her, especially the hot gaze of Ashton. Sophie held her breath as Margaret untied the sting, pulling back the paper to expose the picture that she created. Margaret’s hand immediately went to her mouth to stifle a gasp. For a moment Sophie’s heart felt like it stilled in her chest, unsure of what Margaret would say. Sophie watched as tears filled Margaret’s eyes.
“It’s beautiful.” Margaret sobbed gently. “You have captured everything about him that I loved more than life.” Margaret ran her fingers over her late husband’s features so lovingly it almost pained Sophie to watch. The look in Margaret’s eyes spoke of the love she held for him. Sophie looked up and noticed Bridgette’s tears as well.
Marcus gently touched Sophie’s shoulder. “Thank you.” The appreciation in his eyes was touching. She hadn’t realized how much the picture would affect those who knew the man in the painting.
“Yes. Thank you for this. This is the closest I have felt to him since the day he left this world.” Margaret smiled through her tears.
“I’m glad you like it.” Sophie’s heart swelled, these people loved him very much, and it was written on all of their faces.
Ashton ran his fingers gently down the length of her back, giving Sophie shivers. She wasn’t sure why Ashton insisted on touching her. She had said her goodbye but she couldn’t bring herself to stop him. He stood too close, his addictive smell called to her. His face was so perfect it was impossible not to want to look at him, to want to touch him. If only he would give her some space to clear her head of his spell. Sophie answered Marcus and Bridgette’s questions, and let them know her paintings would be displayed in Mr. Heshman’s art gallery. “It is so good knowing that Margaret is being well cared for.” Bridgette touched Sophie’s forearm. “And I have never seen my son so taken with anyone like he is with you. We have been looking forward to meeting you.”
Ashton cleared his throat as if warning his mother.
“We will be back tomorrow, Mother.” Bridgette leaned down and kissed Margaret’s cheek. “Call if you need anything.”
“Of course. Good night, love.” Margaret smiled.
After Ashton’s parents left, Sophie made tea for Margaret and then helped her upstairs so she could ready herself for bed. Margaret grew tired and wished to retire early. Sophie helped Margaret into bed, giving her the pain medication she needed.
“Ashton will not be able to let go, he’s too far gone. I can see it in his eyes when he looks at you.” Margaret looked up at Sophie thoughtfully. “My husband used to look at me like that.” Sophie wasn’t able to respond; she could only smile sadly. “He told me you don’t believe in falling in love.” Margaret took Sophie’s hand. “You should know that it believes in you.”
Sophie sighed. “Goodnight, Margaret. I’ll keep my phone on all night. Just call me if you need anything.” Sophie slid the phone on Margaret’s nightstand closer to the bed so it could be reached easier.
“Think about what I said.”
“I will.”
“Goodnight, Sophie.”
