Текст книги "When You're Back"

Автор книги: Abbi Glines

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Текущая страница: 9 (всего у книги 15 страниц)

Mase

Dean Finlay opened the door to the mansion he shared with Kiro in Beverly Hills. “He’s already passed out for the night. I’ve had a room prepared for you,” he said when I walked inside. “He’ll be a mean bastard in the morning. It’s his new routine.”

I wasn’t scared of the old man’s temper. “I’ll handle him. This shit has to stop. He’s so damn selfish,” I said, angry that he was making life hell not only for Harlow but also for Dean, his best friend. Other than Harlow, Dean was the only person who loved the man.

“You don’t know what she was to him. Unless you lived through it with them, you can’t understand, Mase. He was a different man because of her. The accident, it created someone none of us recognized. It shattered his soul. When that happens to you, you never come back from that.”

I was tired of hearing how losing Emily gave him the right to be a world-class asshole. “You know this because you’ve had that kind of love? ’Cause you sure as hell don’t act like him.”

Dean sighed heavily and shook his head. “Never been in love like that. After seeing how it changed Kiro when he lost her, I never let anyone get close enough to me. I wasn’t going to ever know that pain. Don’t want it.”

I wasn’t sure which was worse, loving and losing or not ever knowing that kind of love at all. Life without Reese seemed empty, devoid, pointless. Would I become like my father if I lost her? I wanted to believe I wouldn’t, but I wasn’t sure a man without a soul could be anything else. If that was true, then could I forgive the man? Could I understand him and not hate him for what he was doing to my sister? Had she already made this connection? She had not only Grant but Lila Kate, too. I didn’t want to think of her losing either of them.

“Don’t judge him when you haven’t been there,” Dean said, with a slap on my back. “Now, go get some rest. You’re gonna need it. He won’t be thrilled to see you.”

He was right. Kiro was going to be pissed that I was here to deal with him. He didn’t want dealing with. He wanted to wallow in his pain. But when I faced him tomorrow, I knew I was going to see him differently. I had to remind myself that this would be me if I lost Reese. A world without her in it was incomprehensible.

I’d set my alarm to wake me up at nine so I could be dressed and ready to face my father. I would need coffee before I did this. Yesterday, Harlow had kept finding reasons to keep me in Rosemary Beach. Finally, I had told her I loved her but I had to go. Getting home to Reese was important, and I had to get to Kiro before I could go home to Reese.

Heading to the kitchen, I heard two voices. I recognized Dean but not the female he was with; she had an accent. Stepping into the bright room, I saw an older lady working over the stove while Dean sat at the table, drinking coffee and leafing through an issue of Rolling Stone magazine. He glanced up and smiled at me.

“Good morning, sunshine. You got up before him. Thank fuck,” he said.

“Coffee?” I asked.

The lady wiped her hands on her apron and started to hurry over to the coffee pot.

“I got it,” I told her. “Just point me to the cups.”

She gave me a nervous smile, then glanced over at Dean.

“Marlana is new,” he said. “Marlana, this is Kiro’s son. You don’t have to wait on him. He’s nothing like his father.”

She glanced up at me, still looking nervous, then reached into the cabinet and got me a cup before hurrying back to her skillet on the stove. Poor woman had to deal with my crazy-ass father. No wonder she was a nervous mess.

I poured my coffee and walked over to the table to sit across from Dean.

“You want a newspaper? I think there’s one over by the front door. Marlana normally gets it and puts it there. Don’t know why we have one, since neither of us reads it.”

“I get it,” Marlana said, turning around and hurrying out of the room. I didn’t need the paper, but she was fast.

Dean shrugged. “She’s very eager to please. If Kiro doesn’t scare her off first.”

“My plan is to make sure his head is on right before I leave here.”

“Plans don’t always pan out. Remember, that man lives and breathes for that woman. He’s really losing her this time.”

My chest ached. All I could think of was losing Reese.

“Makes you regret falling in love, eh?” Dean said, looking back down at the magazine in his hand.

He was wrong. I’d never regret Reese. I would never regret those feelings. She had opened up my world in a way I had never imagined. She had changed my life. She had given me true happiness. I shook my head. “No, it doesn’t.”

Dean looked back up at me.

“Before Reese, I didn’t know that the world could be full of dreams. That you could wake up every day excited to breathe. That one smile from her could make me feel like a fucking king. Loving her is worth . . . it’s worth it all. Living in fear of love isn’t living.”

He frowned and put his magazine down, then continued sipping his coffee. He didn’t look like he believed me. In reality, he was as sad as Kiro. He didn’t know true, raw emotion. He didn’t know that one woman could make you feel everything.

I could tell he was thinking of saying something, but he changed his mind.

“Kiro won’t crawl out of bed for another two hours. I suggest you let him get up on his own. If you wake him, you’re just going to have a more difficult time.”

“Fine. I’ll eat and then call Reese.”

Dean set his cup down. “Marlana is making pancakes and sausage. Or she was, until she ran off to get your paper. At least look at the damn thing. The woman is too old to be running around so much.”

That was all he said before he walked out of the kitchen with a swagger that was similar to my father’s. I decided a long time ago that only rock stars knew how to walk that way.

Marlana came shuffling in and put the paper in front of me. “Breakfast ready soon,” she assured me, then went back to the stove.

I opened the paper, not giving a shit what it had to say, but, like Dean said, she’d gone and gotten it for me. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings.

Reese

I had called and gotten Maryann to pick me up an hour early yesterday so I wouldn’t be there when Captain returned. The more I thought about it, the more I wished I hadn’t told him about my dyslexia. What was it about him that made me blurt stuff out?

Mase had called me when he landed in Los Angeles. We talked during his ride to his father’s house in Beverly Hills. I could tell he was tense and nervous about what he was going to find when he got there, and I felt guilty about not being there with him.

To make up for leaving work early yesterday, I had come in early this morning. I had slept better than the night before because I was so tired from lack of sleep. If all went well today, Mase would be coming home.

Piper would also be back today, and I wanted to make sure everything was neat and ready for her. I checked on the horses and swept the floors of the dust that had blown in overnight. Then I headed back to my office.

The rest of the morning went quickly. I kept waiting for a call from Mase, but I focused on getting all my work done in case anything new came up today.

Right after Piper left for lunch, the door opened, and in walked a little boy who couldn’t have been more than ten. At first, I thought he was a student of Piper’s whose parents had gotten the time wrong. Until Captain walked in behind the kid.

What?

“Glad you’re here. Henry and I made the drive out yesterday to find you’d already gone home. Early.”

He had planned on bringing a kid to see me? I was confused. “Um, yes, I finished up early,” which was a lie. I felt a twinge of guilt.

“That’s all right. Henry and I made plans to come back here today. We even brought steak fajitas from the restaurant. Henry’s dad is the head cook at Stouts and Hawkins here in Dallas. He’s become my bud. I wanted to introduce him to one of my other friends.”

What was he doing? Bringing me food again and using a kid so that I would eat with him and be nice? Captain made no sense. He said he wasn’t flirting with me, but then he did things like this.

“My daddy makes the best steak fajitas,” Henry said proudly. He was a cute kid. “He made you special ones. With his secret sauce.”

“Oh, thank you. It smells delicious,” I said to Henry as Captain began laying the food out in front of me.

“Can we have a picnic? It’s more fun to eat outside. Besides, this place smells like horse poop,” Henry said, looking up at Captain and crinkling his nose.

Captain laughed and brought his gaze to mine. “Would you be OK with that, Reese?”

Like I was going to tell this kid no. He knew that. Dang him. “Of course,” I said through clenched teeth, then forced a smile as I picked up the box Captain had put in front of me.

“Great. I’ll grab the blanket out of the back of my truck,” Captain said. He headed out to his truck, leaving Henry and me with our hands full of food.

“He has a blanket in his truck?” I asked.

Henry nodded. “Yep. We look at stars on nights my daddy has to work too late.”

So Captain watched a little boy while his daddy worked. Not what I was expecting. That didn’t go with the image of Captain in my head.

“Kinsley went with us the other night. She was off work, and we got milkshakes and went to see the stars. But Kinsley didn’t like it much. She griped a lot.”

That didn’t say a lot about her character. I hoped Captain wouldn’t force her to be around Henry anymore. He didn’t need that. I wondered where Henry’s mother was, but it didn’t sound like she was around, so I didn’t ask.

“Got it. Lead the way, Henry. Take us to a prime picnic spot,” Captain said, grinning at the boy. I had never seen that grin on him before. It was real. It wasn’t calculated or planned. It wasn’t a bad smile.

Henry walked a short way from the stables and stopped where I assumed he couldn’t smell the horses anymore. He nodded his head to let us know we should settle here, his shaggy brown hair falling into his eyes. I wanted to tuck it behind his ear, but I was sure he wouldn’t appreciate it.

Captain spread the blanket out for us, took the food from me, and placed it on the blanket while Henry laid out the food he had been carrying. Captain reached into his back pocket and tossed Henry a can of soda. Then he looked at me. “Got you one, too.”

He handed me the can, and I managed a “Thank you.” I sat with my legs crossed and placed the box of food he handed me in my lap.

“Ain’t gonna be easy eating fajitas out here. But it don’t stink, and it’s more fun,” Henry said, smiling at me.

“You’re right. It does smell better, and it’s a lot more fun. Besides, I eat in my office every day. This is a nice change.”

Henry looked at Captain. “She’s better than Kinsley. She knows what’s fun,” the boy said.

I didn’t look at Captain. Instead, I focused on my food. I had to get through this lunch. I would set Captain straight when Henry wasn’t with him. I didn’t know what his motives were for bringing the child here. Was he trying to manipulate me?

I didn’t trust him. This only justified that feeling.

I picked up my fajita and took a bite. I could see Henry’s eyes on me, waiting for a reaction.

“Mmmm, this is amazing. The best fajita I’ve ever had. You’re right, your daddy sure knows his stuff.”

Henry beamed, then turned to his own food and began eating.

I could feel Captain watching me, but I wasn’t going to look at him. I was going to eat this food and be nice to Henry, and then I was going to start locking my office door when Piper was out. No more Captain interruptions.

“Why don’t you tell Reese about the book you’re writing, Henry?” Captain said. I watched as Henry looked at him shyly, as if he was unsure. “She’ll love it, promise,” Captain encouraged him.

Henry finally turned his big brown eyes to me, and the freckles on his nose made his face even cuter. “Back in November, I won the spelling bee at my school. Then I went to a statewide spelling bee, and I won it, too. I’ll be going to the nationals in May.”

Wow. That was something to be proud of. At his age, I hadn’t even been able to write my name correctly. “That’s awesome!” I beamed at him. “You must be a very gifted speller.”

Henry glanced at Captain again before looking at me. “That’s why I’m writing a book. Because I’m dyslexic. That’s when you don’t always see words and numbers the way other people do,” he said, watching me closely.

The reason Captain had wanted me to meet Henry was now becoming clear. This hadn’t been some scheme. I nodded my head. “I know what dyslexia is,” I assured him.

He seemed relieved that he didn’t have to explain himself. “Lots of times, kids with dyslexia get ignored or believe they can’t do something. I want to tell them they can. My daddy and I spelled words every minute we had a chance to for months before those spelling bees. I think people with dyslexia can do anything they want to. They just have to believe in themselves.”

I felt emotion clog my throat. This little boy was going to live a full life. He’d never be told he was stupid, and he would have a chance to finish high school and get a college degree. I didn’t know his father, but I loved him. I loved that Henry wasn’t suffering what I had gone through. I put the unfinished fajita down and sniffled, trying not to cry. “That’s a wonderful thing to do, Henry. Kids and adults with dyslexia need to hear that message. They need to be inspired by your story.”

Henry was smiling from ear to ear now. “I think so, too. If it hadn’t been for my dad telling me I could do anything over and over, I don’t know if I’d have tried out for the spelling bee. But I wanted to, and he convinced me I could.”

I wanted that for all kids. It was heartbreaking to know that not everyone would get that kind of support in their lives or be told that nothing was wrong with them. Knowing they were capable of so much would do wonders for their self-esteem. “Your dad sounds like a very special man,” I said sincerely.

Henry nodded. “He is. He’s the best.”

Once again, no mention of his mother.

It was time for me to admit to Henry that I had dyslexia, too. Sharing this with people wasn’t something I ever did. It was hard on me, but this little boy was going to share his story with the world. He was proud of what he could do while dealing with this challenge. There was no shame in being dyslexic.

“Henry,” I said, and he looked up at me as he chewed his food. “I have dyslexia, too.”

His little eyes went wide, and then a huge grin broke across his face. “I knew you were special,” he replied. “Just like me.”

Those words sank into my heart, and I knew they’d stay there forever.

Mase

It was well past lunchtime before Kiro came stumbling into the entertainment room, where I was sitting with Dean while he played on the Xbox. I had threatened to wake Kiro up several times, but each time, Dean shook his head and warned me I would just make things worse.

When Kiro’s bleary, bloodshot eyes saw me, he stopped. “Fuck,” he muttered, then walked toward the bar. That was my cue to stand up and do something.

“I’m here to talk, Kiro. I’d prefer to do that with you sober.”

He tried to shove me aside, but he was too hungover and weak. I didn’t budge. “My fucking house, boy. Move out of my way!” he yelled.

I didn’t flinch. “Well, Harlow is my sister, and you upsetting her, stressing her out, and making her cry is my fucking business. So sit your sorry ass down and listen to me.”

Just like I knew he would, he snapped out of his stupor at the sound of Harlow’s name. “What’s wrong with my baby girl?” he asked, running a hand through his hair, causing it to stick up even more.

“She’s worried about you. She loves you. And you’re upsetting her by acting this way. Think about her heart, Kiro. We don’t want something happening to her because you can’t get your shit together.”

He shook his head. “No, nothing can happen to my baby girl. I need her. Can’t lose her,” he said, sounding like a broken man instead of the angry drunk who had walked in here.

“Then snap out of this. Get your head on straight. Is this the way Emily would want you to behave? Would this make her happy?”

“Don’t talk about my Emmy!” he roared, this time shoving me back with more force. “You don’t understand what this is! You don’t fucking understand. My heart.” He stopped, tilted his head back, and looked up at the sky. “She stole my heart. That pretty angel face. So innocent and sweet. She’ll always have it. My life with her was perfect.” He turned his haunted gaze back to me. “Perfect! So fucking perfect! But it ended. I ended. And if I lose all I have left of her, I don’t want to live anymore. I can’t take this pain.”

His eyes weren’t those of the rock legend who appeared on the covers of magazines looking like he owned the world. He didn’t have that swagger that defined him. Not now. He was shredded.

Kiro Manning was gone. In his place was a man who was about to become untethered from this earth. If he’d been a good father to me, if I loved him the way Harlow did, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stand here and take this. My chest tightened in pain for a man I had spent most of my life questioning if he gave a shit about me.

“Harlow needs you. Lila Kate needs a grandfather,” I said simply, reminding him that if Emily was lost, his whole world wasn’t gone. “If something happens to you, Harlow will be crushed. That girl adores you. Could you really do that to her? Can’t you find the will to survive this and be the father she needs?”

Kiro stumbled back and leaned against the sofa, holding his head in both hands. “She’s fading away. I don’t know if I can make it without her. I love my baby girl. We both love our baby girl. She’s grown up to be a beautiful woman and mother. I’m so proud of her. I’ve given her nothing to be proud of.”

I would have liked to agree with him, but I knew Harlow wouldn’t agree. So I spoke for my sister, who didn’t have the ability to handle this herself. “You’re wrong. She’s proud of you. She’s always been proud of you. And when she found out that you stayed by her mother’s side through all this, it rocked her. She knows you love her mother. She’s seen it, and that makes her even more proud of you. She saw a side of you she never knew existed. We all did.”

Kiro rubbed his face and gave a frustrated roar before letting his hands fall to his side. “Did Dean call you? I don’t need this shit right now, son. Why can’t I deal with this the only way I know how?”

His way of dealing was getting trashed and upsetting Harlow. “Your way affects my sister, so that affects me. Dean didn’t call me. Rush paid me a visit. Grant was worried about his wife. He’ll protect Harlow any way he can. Surely you can understand that? Your little girl is loved just as fiercely as you love Emily.”

At the sound of Emily’s name, Kiro flinched as if it pained him. “What is it you want me to do? Be fucking Superman? I’m not motherfucking Superman! I’ve never been. Can’t start now just because you come in here demanding it.”

Kiro had tunnel vision. He was hurting, and that was all the man could see. He was losing Emily, and he could accept nothing more. I wanted to grab the man and shake him. Instead, I clenched my hands at my sides and took a deep breath to calm my frustration. “Do you want Harlow to lose you both? Do you think she can handle that? Do you want her brokenhearted? Don’t you want to be a part of your granddaughter’s life? Here’s your chance to be the man Emily would have wanted you to be. You and I both know you weren’t the father she would have wanted for Harlow. You can’t save her, but you can grant her the one thing we both know she’d want. She would want you to be the best damn grandfather on the planet for Lila Kate.”

“I’m the best grandfather on the planet. He’ll have to be second,” Dean spoke up as he kept playing on the Xbox.

Seriously? Did the man not realize this conversation was important?

“Fuck off, asshole,” Kiro grumbled.

“Just setting him straight,” Dean replied.

A hint of a smile touched Kiro’s lips. “I want to make Emily proud. She loves Lila Kate. She brightens up whenever Harlow brings her to visit. If she could, she’d be the fucking best grandmother there ever was.”

“I won’t argue with you on that one. Emily was special,” Dean said.

“Is special,” Kiro snapped. “She is fucking special.”

Dean tossed down the remote control and turned to look at Kiro. “She is special, Kiro. But we both know she’s not the same. The Emily who left the day of the accident didn’t return the same. She’s been locked in that body, unable to function, for twenty-three years. You’ve held on to her longer than any doctor believed possible. To want to keep her here like that is selfish, man. I miss her, too. She made you a better man. That man was lost twenty-three years ago, too. The boy is right. You can’t save her. But you can damn well make her proud of you. Don’t you want her to be thankful that she had a life with you? Of course you do! You would do anything for that woman. Do this for her. Fucking do this. For. Her.”

I didn’t need to say more. Dean had said it all. Perfectly. He’d lived in a world where my father had loved a woman and been happy. He knew things I didn’t. Seeing Kiro through Dean’s eyes was enlightening.

“She’d want me to be strong. She’d expect it,” Kiro said, staring at the floor in front of him.

Neither of us said a thing. We let him take it all in. Dean had stood up from his spot on the sofa, and we looked at each other over Kiro’s bent head. We both wanted our message to get through to him.

“I want there to be a heaven. I want it for her. She should be dancing and laughing. She has the best laugh. I want there to be a place where she can have all that. Tell me that when this life ends, it’s not over, that she has a new life ahead of her, full of all she was robbed of in this one.”

I swallowed through the emotion constricting my throat. God, I never wanted to go through this. Kiro had been an asshole most of my life, but no one deserved to deal with pain this intense.

Dean walked over and threw his arm over Kiro’s shoulder. “There’s a heaven, man. There has to be a heaven for angels. And Emily was an angel. She was yours. It ain’t over after this life.”

Kiro closed his eyes and nodded. “You’re right. My angel will be OK. She’ll dance again.”

Dean glanced over at me and nodded. Kiro was going to make it. He had a hard road still ahead, but he was now focused on making Emily proud of him. That was the only thing that could shake him out of this. He never wanted to let her down.