Текст книги "Throb"
Автор книги: Vi Keeland
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Текущая страница: 15 (всего у книги 16 страниц)
chapter forty-one
Kate—
1 day later
Today I’m reminded why I did the right thing. The smile on Kyle’s face when he returned home from spinal cord stimulation therapy is contagious. He’s regained a small amount of voluntary control of his muscles, enough so that he could “flex” for me as I helped him back into bed. His hope shined so bright, a little even warmed me today.
Ever since Flynn came by to tell me about his conversation with Miles, I’ve regressed back to the depressing state I was in right after Cooper and I broke up. I feel like I’m missing a few pieces of the puzzle still. Even if it’s true that Miles blackmailed Cooper into breaking things off, and he did it to save me from myself, how could he have turned to Tatiana so soon? Why wouldn’t he have come to me? I spend hours trying to figure out why I feel like something’s missing, but in the end the only thing I’m clear about is that I’ve lost a piece of my heart.
My phone buzzes and I smile seeing his name on the caller ID.
“What, you don’t call, you don’t write?” Frank’s jovial voice booms loudly through the car speaker.
“You miss me, don’t you?” I say.
“I do, kid. I do. Are you too big and famous to play cards with us anymore?”
“Is that an invitation or just a general question?”
“Can you come tonight? Eight o’clock.” There’s a smile in his voice. “Grip and Ben took all my money last time. I need you to teach the bums a lesson.”
I laugh. “I’d love to come.”
“All right, kid. I’ll see you later.”
I park and sit in the car for a few minutes outside the studio. The memory of the first night I played cards here months ago still affects me, even through my sadness. I had no idea who Cooper was, but the flex of his forearm almost had me losing hands a few times—my focus so thrown by the effect the man had on me from the moment I laid eyes on him.
Taking a deep cleansing breath, I push the memory to the back of my mind and lift the case of Stella out of the back of my Jeep and head into the studio.
“Frank?” My voice echoes in the cavernous empty hangar. The usual card table isn’t set up yet. The large room is perfectly still, an invitation to my mind to run off and daydream.
The heavy steel door clanks open loudly, then slams shut.
“I was beginning to wonder if I had the wrong night.” I turn, expecting to find Frank, and freeze—my gaze locking on brilliant green eyes. I ached to see him, dreamed of running to him, yet a tangled mesh of feelings stir inside me that keeps me rooted in place.
As he moves across the room with his usual confidence and grace, every emotion I forced down over the last month comes flooding to the surface all at once.
I missed him every second of every day, but seeing him before me makes me remember all the reasons why. The way he looks at me like he wants to devour me, his cocky confidence that borders on arrogance, his irresistible charm, the way he commands a room without having to say or do a thing.
My heart pounds in my chest.
My mind finally stops whirling with questions and goes blank.
Cooper stops as he reaches where I’m standing. I don’t move an inch, my feet securely cemented to the earth.
I look at him. He stares at me.
His face is a mask. I can’t tell if he’s happy to see me or angry I’m here. While what’s going on inside of him may be completely unreadable, there’s a rash of emotions churning inside my own stomach that are impossible to ignore.
He folds his arms over his chest in a closed-off stance.
I don’t know what to say or do. Maybe he’s just as surprised to see me as I am to see him. His beautiful face is somber, and his green eyes are distant. It’s physically painful to be this close, yet feel so far away.
The seconds tick by. I’m certain he must be able to hear the pounding of my heartbeat, it’s so loud. Yet we just stare—neither of us saying a word. I long for him to open his folded arms and invite me in, but he doesn’t.
Mimicking his stance, I wrap my shaky arms around my waist to occupy them. So badly they want to reach out and touch him—I’m afraid they might. My body has a mind of its own when it comes to this man.
“How are you?” Unable to take the deafening silence any longer, I finally speak. His green eyes darken with emotion. He’s angry with me.
“How do you think I am?” The pain in his voice slices through me.
I close my eyes. Blinking back tears when I reopen them. “Do you want me to leave?” I ask softly.
“I wouldn’t have arranged for you to be here if I wanted you to leave.”
A spark of hope ignites in the darkness I’ve been shrouded in.
“I don’t understand?”
Cooper blows out a rush of air. “Neither do I, Kate.” He rakes his fingers through his hair, then regains his intimidating composure.
Our eyes lock in a challenging stare off, until I finally break. All the sadness I’ve been carrying, all the hurt and anger, bubbles to the top. My need to know the truth is greater than any silly race to win our stalemate. “Did Miles threaten you with things that could hurt me to make you break things off?”
He swallows. “Yes.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? We could have figured out a way.”
“You said it yourself best. You couldn’t give winning your all while we were together. If it were just me he’d ruin, I’d never have walked away. I’d have let him take everything I own to keep you.” He pauses and his voice drops lower. “I know how much you love your brother. It was too much to risk.”
He’s right—I’d never have been able to connect with Flynn like I did if he didn’t free me. Since Flynn came to see me, all I could focus on was how Cooper could tear us apart. I was upset he didn’t trust me enough to figure it out together. But in this moment, I finally understand. My eyes well with tears. I’ve been so busy being mad at him for making the decision without me, I couldn’t see what he really did. He made the decision for me.
“Tatiana,” I whisper. “How could you have so soon?”
“I used Tatiana to chase you away. To set you free to do what you needed to do.”
“So you slept with her for me?” There’s a bitter edge to my voice.
“I didn’t sleep with her.” His jaw flexes and it looks like he’s contemplating adding more.
“Truth,” I remind him.
“I didn’t lay a finger on her the night you came over and found her there. I went out with her once before we met. That’s it.” His eyes close and then come back to find mine. “I settled for less before you walked into my life.”
“Then why didn’t you come to me after the show was over?”
“I thought you were with him. You looked … happy.”
The pain in his eyes when he utters his truth wraps around my heart and squeezes so tightly my hand reaches up to rub my chest. He acted so selflessly, without regard to his own happiness. It must have killed him to watch the show. The editors pieced together my small moments of joy to make them appear like I was blissfully in love.
Head bowed, he looks up through tortured eyes and asks, “Do you love him?”
“No.”
He steps closer to me and I think I stop breathing for a second. “Remember when I asked you if you believed in loving something and setting it free to find out if it’s meant to be?”
“You told me you were more of the school of if you want something you should pursue it aggressively.”
“I finally understand the difference. If you want something, you pursue it aggressively and nothing gets in your way. If you love something, sometimes you have no choice but to set it free so it can find its way back to you forever. It killed me to let go, but I’d do it again if it meant your happiness in the end. That’s how I know.”
“Know what?” I whisper with apprehension, although my heart opens wide with hope.
One hand grasps my waist and his other rises to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear. “Know that I love you. In a way that is irrational and incomprehensible, but is the only thing that has ever made sense to me.”
My eyes close, trying to quell the deluge of tears I’m no longer able to keep at bay. It doesn’t work, the downpour comes. “I thought I’d lost you.”
Cooper cups my cheeks, his thumbs catching the salty stream as he moves in closer. “Shhh … I know,” he says. “I know. I’m sorry. But I knew you’d have given up anything for a chance for Kyle and I had to do it.”
“I missed you every day.” My soft cry intensifies. Weeks of pent-up emotions all break free at once. “When we went back to Barbados, I saw you everywhere I looked. Losing you felt like I lost a piece of myself.” Crying turns to an ugly sob.
He lets me weep it all out, holding me tightly while it all washes away. Sadness, anger, regret, doubt, hurt. When I finally calm, he brings his hand to my face and wipes away every last tear. Silence falls between us as our eyes meet and I confess what I’ve known for months but never admitted out loud.
“I love you. So much.”
His eyes close, relief softens his face as he draws me near. He kisses my forehead, then presses his to mine. We communicate with only our eyes for a long moment. I watch in utter amazement, completely captivated as a transformation in his gaze takes form. The golden sunflowers in the middle of his beautiful green sea blossom, coming alive again.
The allure of our attraction can’t be denied and neither can the love. He cups the back of my neck with one hand, and the other strokes my cheek. Slowly, his mouth grazes over mine. It’s a whisper-soft touch, but it’s enough to awaken every nerve in my body. Lord, I want this man. Love this man with all of my heart.
“Remember the first night we met in this room? I had the little chip I always carry with me out for luck?” I push my lips against his again.
“Every time you swiped your little finger over it, you won.”
I smile. “Winning wasn’t luck. That was talent. I wished for you.”
“You didn’t have to wish,” he breathes. “You had me from the moment my eyes landed on you.”
epilogue
Kate—
Six months later
“I’m calling last hand. I have an early meeting in the morning,” Cooper says, leaning back in his chair with an easy smile. His stack of chips is nearly depleted—it usually is, but these nights once a month are some of the happiest and carefree times.
Last month, I decided to get a little daring with my bets. I’d come straight from school and didn’t have anything of value to enter for the last hand. So, not unlike the first day I met Cooper, I tore a piece of paper from my purse, scribbled something and tossed the folded up paper into the pot.
I threw three kings face down to lose to Cooper’s pair of fives. He mumbled something about what would have happened if Ben or Frank had won, as he guided my head down into his lap to collect his prize on the drive home.
But tonight I’ve come prepared. We’d spent the last two days arguing over the car he bought me. My Jeep broke down for the third time in as many weeks and he hates that I don’t have what he calls reliable transportation. It’s bad enough he won’t let me pitch in toward any of the household expenses since I moved in a month ago. I certainly don’t need him buying me a new car.
With a daring smile, I dangle the keys in the air for a second before dropping them into the center of the pile. Frank whistles, catching a glimpse of the Range Rover key fob, and tosses in a watch. Ben opens a bag on the floor and parks a tall awards statue in the middle of the table. Heads turn to see what Cooper will be anteing tonight.
Yielding a mix of anger and playfulness in his penetrating glare, Cooper takes a piece of paper from his pocket, scribbles something, and arches an eyebrow to me as he tosses it to the center of the table.
Frank and Ben drop out with a huff when I raise. I really want to win, although I’m not sure if the thought of Cooper having to keep the Ranger Rover or what’s inside the folded-up note is a bigger incentive.
The luck I’ve had all evening runs dry as I peek at my crappiest hand of the night—not even a pair amongst the five cards I’m dealt. But I don’t let that deter me at all. Keeping only the two red hearts and discarding everything else, I brush my finger over my old black lucky chip as I lift my three replacement cards.
Watching me intently, Cooper never says anything, but I know he doesn’t believe in any of my lucky charms.
With a knowing grin, he turns over five different cards. A losing hand even if I hadn’t been lucky in my draw and picked up the three tens that I did. I rake the pile in and ceremoniously drop it into my purse. Whatever prize is written on that paper is best read when we’re alone.
“You know, you don’t need to throw your game so I can collect the prize you’re offering. I can beat you fair and square,” I say, coming out of the bathroom after getting ready for bed. One of the things I love best about living here is the unfettered access to his dress shirts. It might be one of the things Cooper likes best too, seeing as I rarely button them.
“Who said I threw the game?”
I shake my head and walk to my purse to dig out what I’ve won. “Not even you play cards that bad. But it doesn’t matter. I’m looking forward to collecting my prize anyway.” It takes me a minute to dig the little folded-up square from my bag, my smile already in place anticipating what sort of perverted words I’ll find.
Feeling Cooper’s eyes burning into me, I unfold the note painstakingly slowly, a sort of mental foreplay. I wet my lips in anticipation, but they part finding what he’s written: two words, and not the two that I expected. Marry me.
I stop breathing. Holding the paper to my lips, I turn and my already full eyes find Cooper. He’s down on one knee, a black velvet box perched in the center of his hand.
I have no idea how my knees don’t buckle when I take the two steps to walk to him. My beautiful, confident, loving man smiles up at me before he speaks, and in the moment, he shows me how vulnerable he is. A side I rarely see from a man who goes after everything in life like he’s on a seek-and-destroy mission.
The hand not offering the ring box reaches out to me, and I place my trembling hand in his. “Kate Monroe. Even though I lose every hand to you, at the end of the day, I’m the big winner because you go home with me every night. I don’t need a chip or a four-leaf clover for all my wishes to come true. I only need you. Marry me, beautiful.”
Kate—
Four months later—
on the eleventh day of the eleventh month
The big day has finally arrived. Parting the elegant drapery just enough to peer out at the crowd on the beach waiting below, I watch as the last empty seats fill with guests. It’s certainly an eclectic enough looking crowd. Cooper’s side is filled with an interesting mix of Hollywood royalty—studio heads, directors, actors—sitting alongside lighting grips, secretaries, and security guards. Noticeably absent is one man I’d hoped to convince Cooper to invite, but he wouldn’t budge in the least.
Miles isn’t here. It saddens me the two couldn’t reconcile. They’re basically the only family left for each other. I know Miles is the one who did all the damage, but somehow I still feel guilty that it was my actions that gave him the ammunition for the gun he held to Cooper’s head.
A few more people trickle in that I don’t recognize, then a familiar face leisurely swaggers in. A few women do a double take, although he doesn’t seem to even notice. He looks great, tanned and relaxed, with his trademark long hair pulled back into a ponytail. I smile, thinking how only a year ago seeing Flynn Beckham at my wedding was unthinkable.
But Cooper slowly warmed to him. Flynn definitely earned points by coming to see him, helping us reconcile after the show. But it was our staged public break-up that solidified that the bachelor wasn’t such a Dickhead after all. As part of the deal we made so I could win the prize, Flynn and I had agreed we would say my returning to school and his leaving for tour was hard on our relationship and we were parting ways friends. But the media loved him and he knew they’d be horrible to me, blaming me for our demise with made-up stories. It also meant Cooper and I had to continue to keep our relationship quiet.
I called Flynn the day after Cooper and I reunited to thank him. The next day, Flynn took Jessica out to a very public lunch and then kissed her for a full five minutes while cameras snapped away in a frenzy. After that, I was free and Flynn was deemed a playboy who broke the girl-next-door’s heart.
“Your brother was out there at seven this morning, practicing,” Mom says, coming up behind me and looking out the window over my shoulder. Cooper had a wide wooden platform constructed that leads from the inside of the restaurant to the altar set up on the beach, so that Kyle would be able to walk me down the aisle in his wheelchair. All he needs to do is push a button to start and stop motion, but that’s not always a feat he’s capable of.
“He puts too much pressure on himself. I wish he would let someone wheel him down.”
“He wants to escort you alone. He’s stubborn. But he can do it.”
Between the experimental drugs and promising therapy, my brother has made progress. But the progress isn’t always consistent and he sometimes grows frustrated. Cooper and I had a custom wheelchair made for Kyle’s birthday last month. I might not let my generous fiancé buy me cars, but chipping in for a ten-thousand-dollar wheelchair is more than okay.
The tick of the clock growing louder, Mom helps me attach my veil. There’s a knock on the door as I take one last look in the mirror. “Who is it?” my mother asks, but the door creaks open before the response comes.
“I need a minute with Kate, Lena.”
“No! Cooper. It’s bad luck.” She tries to shoo him out and shut the door, but she doesn’t really have any idea who she’s dealing with.
“It’s okay, Mom. It’s fine. He can come in.”
Her eyes go wide as saucers. “Really? But it’s bad luck.” She can’t believe what she’s hearing. Oddly, me, the person who doesn’t step on a crack for fear of breaking my mother’s back, is actually okay with seeing the groom ten minutes before the wedding. It’s kind of shocking even to me.
Cooper opens the door and my mother leaves the two of us alone. He eyes me in the mirror I’m still facing. “You look … gorgeous.” I may not be the most beautiful woman in the world, but to him, I am at this very moment. He leaves no room for anyone else.
“Thank you. But you could have told me that in ten minutes.” I turn, placing my palms on the lapels of his swoon-worthy tuxedo. “It must be important if you’re willing to risk bad luck, knowing how I am.”
“You know that none of that’s true. You’d beat me at cards whether you had a lucky chip or not and we’ll grow old together fifty years from now.” He wraps his arm around my waist.
His nose nuzzles in my hair. “You smell good too.”
“Cooper?”
“Hmmm.”
“Did you come here for a reason? Because I am not having sex with you ten minutes before we are getting married.”
“That sounds like a challenge,” he says and I see that look growing in his eye. The one that both of us know I can’t resist.
“Cooper …” I warn. “I’m kicking you out.”
He takes a step back, his hands scrubbing the hormone-induced haze from his face. “No. I came to give you something.”
“That’s what I’m afraid of.”
He grins. “Get your dirty mind out of the gutter, soon-to-be Mrs. Montgomery. I’ll give you that after the ceremony. In the coat closet, on the way to the reception.” He winks. I wouldn’t put it past him for a second.
“Close your eyes.”
“Seriously, Cooper, we …”
“Just trust me. Close your eyes.”
I do as he asks. I feel him move around the room and then he’s back in front of me. “Open your eyes.”
He’s kneeling down in front of me.
“Lift.” One hand on my ankle, he guides me to lift my foot, then slips off my shoe. His finger goes to the toe and he removes the four-leaf clover I’d stashed there, but never told him about.
“But … I already tempted fate by letting you see me before the ceremony.” Panic starts to rise.
Cooper lifts my bouquet placed at the floor next to him. I hadn’t even noticed he put it there. He hands me the simple bundle of roses with a few silk ribbons cascading from the bottom. “Look underneath.”
Confused, I turn the flowers upside down. Something sparkly affixed to the top of the ribbon captures my attention. It couldn’t be. How could he ever find them?
“Are these …”
He nods. “They’re mine now. But I thought you might need something borrowed.”
My eyes sting with tears I desperately try to hold back. “I can’t believe you got these back for me.” Securely fastened to the ribbon under my bridal bouquet are my father’s lucky four-leaf clover cufflinks, the ones he had made when I was born. He wore them to all four World Poker championships—firmly believing they brought him luck each time he won. Sometime between his last win and next loss at the national championships, he lost them in a “sure thing” bet he made. A year later he died of a heart attack.
“I don’t even know what to say. I love them. You found my father’s lucky charm.”
“I’m glad you love them. But you’re wrong. I’m marrying his lucky charm in a few minutes.” He kisses my lips softly.
“You’re going to make me cry.”
“No. I’m going to spend the rest of my life making you smile and giving you orgasms.” He pulls me flush against his body. I have no doubt he’ll do both. This man is a royal straight flush. A field of four leaf clovers. He’s red skies at night. I need no other lucky charm, as long as I have him.
“Thank you, Cooper. I love them.”
“And I love you.”
Ten minutes later, at exactly eleven-eleven, on the eleventh day of November, I married the love of my life. As my husband said when he kissed me for the first time as his wife, “There’s nobody luckier than me.”
And just like that, the game was finally over.
