Текст книги "Awakened"

Автор книги: P. C. Cast

Соавторы: Kristin Cast,P. C. Cast
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Текущая страница: 15 (всего у книги 16 страниц)

Linda sighed. Trying not to feel disappointed and annoyed at her mother, she went inside. “It’s really not her fault. She’d be here if I hadn’t stopped coming by.” She was used to her mother’s weird way of knowing whenever she was going to have a visitor. “Looks like her radar still works.”

For a moment she stood in the middle of the living room, trying to decide what to do. Maybe she should go back to Broken Arrow. Maybe John would leave her alone for a while—or at least long enough for her to get an attorney and get him served with papers.

But she’d broken her rule about no overnights during the week, and the kids were at friends’ houses. She didn’t have to go back. Linda sighed again, and this time with her inhaled breath she took in the scents of her mother’s home: lavender, vanilla, and sage—real scents from real herbs and hand-poured soy candles, so unlike the PlugIns John insisted she use instead of “those sooty candles and those dirty old plants.” And that decided her. Linda marched into her mother’s kitchen and went straight to the little, but well stocked wine rack and pulled out a nice red. She was going to drink an entire bottle of wine and read one of her mother’s romance novels, and then stagger up to the guest loft, and she was going to enjoy every minute of it. Tomorrow her mother would give her an herbal tea concoction to get rid of her hangover, and she’d also help her figure out how to get her life back on the right track—a track that didn’t include John Heffer and did include her Zoey.

“Heffer, what a stupid name,” Linda said, pouring herself a glass of wine and taking a long, slow drink. “That name is one of the first things I’m going to get rid of!” She was looking through her mother’s bookshelf, trying to decide between reading something sexy by Kresley Cole, Gena Showalter, or Jennifer Crusie’s latest, Maybe This Time. That was it—the great title decided her because maybe this time she’d do the right thing. Linda was just settling down in her mother’s chair when someone knocked on the door three times.

In her opinion, it was entirely too late for visitors, but you never knew what to expect at her mother’s house, so Linda went to the door and opened it.

The vampyre who stood there was stunningly beautiful, a little familiar looking, and totally, completely naked.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Neferet

“You are not Sylvia Redbird.” Neferet looked down her nose disdainfully at the drab woman who had answered the door.

“No, I’m her daughter, Linda. My mother isn’t in right now,” she said, glancing around nervously.

Neferet knew the moment the human’s eyes found the white bull, because they widened in shock and her face drained of all of its sallow color.

“Oh! It’s a … a … b-bull! Is it making the ground burn? Hurry! Hurry! Come inside where it’s safe. I’ll get you a robe to wear and then call animal control or the police or someone.”

Neferet smiled and turned her head so that she could gaze at the bull, too. He was standing in the middle of the closest lavender field. If one didn’t know better it would, indeed, appear as if he were burning everything around him.

Neferet knew better.

“He isn’t burning the field; he’s freezing it. The withered plants just look scorched. Actually, they’re frozen,” Neferet said in the same matter-of-fact tone she often used in her classroom.

“I’ve– I’ve never seen a bull do that before.”

Neferet lifted one brow at Linda. “Does he truly look like a normal bull to you?”

“No,” Linda whispered. Then she cleared her throat and, obviously trying to sound stern, said to Neferet, “I’m sorry. I’m confused about what’s going on here. Do I know you? May I help you?”

“There is no need for you to be confused or concerned. I am Neferet, High Priestess of Tulsa’s House of Night, and I do most certainly hope you can help me. First, tell me when you expect your mother to return.” Neferet kept her voice affable, though her mind was a jumble of emotions: anger, irritation, and a lovely shiver of fear.

“Oh, that’s why you look familiar. My daughter Zoey goes to that school.”

“Yes, I know Zoey very well.” Neferet smiled smoothly. “When did you say your mother would return?”

“Not until tomorrow. Can I give her a message from you? And would you, uh, like a robe or something?”

“No message and no robe.” Neferet dropped her mask of affability. She lifted her hand and swept several tendrils of Darkness from the shadows surrounding her, then she flung them at the human woman, commanding, “Bind her and bring her out here.” When Neferet felt none of the familiar, painful slice that was the payment for manipulating the lesser threads of Darkness, she smiled at the mammoth bull and dipped her head in acknowledgment of his favor as she approached him.

You shall pay me later, my heartless one, rumbled through her mind. Neferet shivered in anticipation.

Then the human’s pathetic screams intruded on her thoughts and she made a motion over her shoulder, snapping the command, “And gag her! I cannot be expected to bear that noise.”

Linda’s screams stopped as abruptly as they had begun. Neferet stepped into the frozen lavender that encircled the beast, ignoring the cold on her bare feet and against her naked skin as she strode directly up to his great head and stroked one finger down the length of his horn before she dropped to a graceful curtsey before him. When she rose, she smiled into the complete blackness of his eyes and said, “I have your sacrifice.”

The bull’s gaze flicked over her shoulder.

This is not an old, powerful matriarch. This is a pathetic housewife whose life has been consumed by weakness.

“True, but her mother is a Wise Woman of the Cherokee. Her blood flows in this one’s veins.”

Diluted.

“Will she serve as the sacrifice or not? Can you use her to make my Vessel?”

I can, but your Vessel will be only as perfect as your sacrifice, and this woman is far from perfect.

“But will you invest him with power that I can command?”

I will.

“Then my wish is that you accept this sacrifice. I will not wait for the mother when I can have the daughter, and the same blood, now.”

As you wish, my heartless one. I grow weary of this. Kill her quickly and let us move on to other things.

Neferet didn’t speak. She turned and walked over to the human. The woman was pathetic. She wasn’t even struggling. All she was doing was sobbing silently as the tendrils of Darkness cut red swaths across her mouth and face, and all around her body where they bound her.

“I need a blade. Now.” Neferet held out her hand and instantly pain and cold filled it in the shape of a long, obsidian dagger. With one swift motion, Neferet slit Linda’s throat. She watched the woman’s eyes widen and then roll to show only their whites as her life’s blood drained from her.

Catch all of it. Let none of the blood be wasted.

At the bull’s command the tendrils of Darkness writhed all over Linda, attaching to her throat and to any other part of her body from which blood seeped, and began sucking. Mesmerized, Neferet saw that each pulsing tendril had a thread that returned to the bull, dissolving into his body, feeding him the human’s blood.

The bull moaned in pleasure.

When the human was drained to a husk of herself, and the bull was thrumming and swollen with her death, Neferet gave herself to Darkness, utterly and completely.

Heath

“Go long, Neal!” Heath drew back his arm and aimed for the receiver in the Golden Hurricane’s jersey with the name SWEENEY in bold letters across his back.

Sweeney caught it, and then feinted and dodged around a bunch of guys in crimson and cream OU uniforms to make the touchdown.

“Yeah!” Heath raised his fist, laughing and shouting. “Sweeney could catch a gnat off a fly’s back!”

“Are you enjoying yourself, Heath Luck?”

At the sound of the Goddess’s voice Heath put away his fist pump and gave Nyx a semi-guilty smile. “Uh, yeah. It’s great here. There’s always a game I can quarterback—awesome receivers, great fans, and when I get tired of football there’s that lake just down the street. It’s stocked with bass that would make a pro fisherman cry.”

“What about girls? I see no cheerleaders, no fisherwomen.”

Heath’s smile faltered. “Girls? No. Well. I only have one girl and she’s not here. You know that, Nyx.”

“I was just checking.” Nyx’s smile was radiant. “Would you sit and talk with me a moment?”

“Yeah, sure,” Heath said.

Nyx waved her hand and the old-school replication of a college football stadium disappeared. Suddenly Heath found himself standing on the precipice of an enormous canyon, so deep that the river that roared through the bottom of it looked like only a thin silver thread. The sun was rising over the opposite bank of the ridge, and the sky was shaded with the violets and pinks and blues of a beautiful new day.

Movement in the air caught Heath’s eye, and he noticed hundreds, maybe thousands of sparkling globes that were tumbling down into the gorge. He thought some of them looked like electric pearls, and others like geode balls, and still others were fluorescent colors so bright they almost hurt his eyes.

“Wow! It’s awesome up here!” He shaded his eyes with his hand. “What are those thingies?”

“Spirits,” Nyx said.

“Really, like ghosts or something?”

“A little. Mostly like you or something,” Nyx said with a warm smile.

“Well, that’s just weird. I don’t look anything like that. I look like me.”

“Right now you do,” Nyx said.

Heath glanced down at himself, just to be sure he was still, well, him. Relieved at what he saw, he looked back at the Goddess. “Should I get ready to change up?”

“That depends entirely upon you,” Nyx said. “As you would say in your world: I have a proposition for you.”

“Awesome! It’s cool to be propositioned by a goddess!” Heath said.

Nxy frowned at him. “Not that kind of proposition, Heath.”

“Oh. Uh. Sorry.” Heath felt his face getting really warm. Jeeze, he was a retard. “I didn’t mean anything disrespectful. I was just kidding…” He stuttered to a stop, wiping his face with his hand. When he looked at the goddess again, she was smiling wryly at him. “Okay,” he started again, relieved she hadn’t blasted him with a thunderbolt or something. “About that proposition?”

“Excellent. It’s nice to know I have your full attention. My proposition is this: choice.”

Heath blinked. “Choice? Between what?”

“I’m so pleased that you asked,” Nyx said with only a little teasing sarcasm in her divine voice. “I’m going to give you a choice between three futures. You may choose one of the three, but know before you hear the choices that once you decide upon a path, the outcome is not set—it is only your decision that is set. What happens thereafter is left up to chance and fate and the resources of your soul.”

“Okay, I think I get that. I get to pick something, but once I pick it I’m pretty much on my own?”

“With my blessing,” she added.

Heath grinned. “Well, I hope so.”

The Goddess didn’t return his smile. Instead she met his gaze, and he saw all humor was gone from her expression. “I give you my blessing, but only if you find my path. I cannot bless a future in which you choose Darkness.”

“Why would I do that? It doesn’t even make sense,” Heath said.

“Hear me out, my son, and consider the choices I offer you; you will understand then.”

“Okay,” he said, but something about the tone of her voice made his gut tighten.

“Choice one is that you stay here in this realm. You will be content, as you have been. You will frolic eternally with my other joy-filled children.”

“Content doesn’t mean happy,” Heath said slowly. “I’m a jock, but that doesn’t mean I’m stupid.”

“Of course it doesn’t,” said the Goddess. “Choice two: you fulfill your original intent and are reborn. That may mean you stay here and frolic for a century or more, but you will eventually leap from this precipice and return to the mortal realm to be reborn as a human who will eventually find his soul mate again.”

“Zoey!” He spoke the one word that filled his mind, and as he spoke her name Heath wondered why it had taken him so long. What was wrong with him? Why had he forgotten her? Why hadn’t he—

Nyx’s hand touched his arm gently. “Do not punish yourself. The Otherworld can be intoxicating. You did not truly forget your love—you never could. You simply allowed the child within you to rule for a time. He would, eventually, have given way to the adult, and you would have remembered Zoey and your love for her. Under normal circumstances that is the way of things. But the world today is not normal, nor are our circumstances. So, I’m going to ask the child within you to grow up a little more quickly, if you so choose.”

“If it has to do with Zo, then I say yes.”

“Then hear me out, Heath Luck. You can find your Zoey again if you choose to be reborn as a human; I give you my promise on that. You and she are destined to be together, whether it is as vampyre and mate, or vampyre and consort. It will happen, and you can choose to make it happen in this lifetime.”

“Then I—”

Her upraised hand silenced him. “There is a third option from which you may choose. As I speak to you the mortal world is shifting and turning. The great shadow of Darkness in the form of the white bull has gained an unexpected foothold. Good and evil are no longer balanced because of it.”

“Well, can’t you just zap something and fix that?”

“I could if I hadn’t gifted my children with free will.”

“You know, sometimes folks are stupid and they need to be told what to do,” Heath said.

Nyx’s expression remained serious, but her dark eyes sparkled. “If I begin taking away free will and controlling the decisions of my sons and daughters, when does it end? Will I not simply become puppet master, and my children marionettes?”

Heath sighed. “I guess you’re right. I mean, you are a goddess and all, so I’m pretty sure you know what you’re talkin’ about, but it does sound easier.”

“Easier is rarely better,” she said.

“Yeah, I know. And that sucks,” Heath said. “So what about my third choice? Are you trying to tell me it has something to do with good and evil?”

“I am. Neferet has become an immortal, a creature of Darkness. This night she has allied herself with the purest evil that can manifest in the mortal realm, that of the white bull.”

“I know about that. I saw something like that try to get to us when I was first dead.”

Nyx nodded. “Yes, the white bull was awakened by the shifts of good and evil in the mortal world. It has been eons since he roamed between realms as he is doing today.” Heath was disturbed to see the Goddess shiver.

“What’s going on? What’s happening down there?”

“Neferet is being gifted with a Vessel, an empty, golem-type creature, created by Darkness through a terrible sacrifice and lust and greed and hatred and pain—that she can control completely. He will be her ultimate weapon, or at least that is what she desires. Had her sacrifice been more perfect, the Vessel would be the perfect weapon of Darkness, but there is a flaw in his creation, and that is where your choice comes in, Heath.”

“I don’t get it,” Heath said.

“The Vessel is meant to be a soulless machine, but because the sacrifice that fed his creation went awry, I am able to touch him.”

“Like he has an Achilles’ heel?”

“Yes, a little like that. Should you choose this option I would use the flaw in the creature’s creation, and through that weakness I would insert your soul into an otherwise empty Vessel.”

Heath blinked, trying to take in the enormity of what the Goddess was saying. “Would I know I’m me?”

“You would only know that which all reborn souls know—the most refined essence of what you are. That never fades, no matter how many lifetimes you circle through.” Nyx paused, smiled, and added, “And, of course, should you choose, you will also know love. That, too, never fades. It is only suppressed or missed or set aside to circle back around.”

“Wait, hang on. This creature is in Zoey’s world? Right now?”

“He is being created this night in Zoey’s modern world, yes.”

“By Neferet, Zo’s enemy?”

“Yes.”

“So Neferet is gonna use this guy against my Zo?” Heath felt totally pissed.

“I am quite sure that is her intent,” Nyx said.

“Huh,” he snorted. “With me inside him, she can try, but she’s not gonna get very far.”

“Before you make your final choice, you must understand: you will not know yourself. Heath will be gone. Only your essence will remain—not your memories. And you will be dwelling within a being created to destroy that which you love most. You may very well succumb to Darkness.”

“Nyx, bottom line: does Zo need me?”

“She does,” the Goddess said.

“Then I pick the third choice. I want to be put in the Vessel,” Heath said.

Nyx’s smile was radiant. “I am proud of you, my son. Know that you return to the modern world with my very special blessing.”

From the air above her, the Goddess plucked a single strand of something that Heath thought looked like a shimmering thread of silver so bright and shining and beautiful that it made him gasp. She circled her fingers, so that the strand grew to a quarter-sized orb that glistened and glowed with an ancient, special light like a moonstone illuminated from within.

“That’s so totally cool! What is it?”

“Magick of the oldest kind. It is rarely present in the modern world; it does not suffer civilization well. But the white bull’s ancient magick created the Vessel, so it is only right that my ancient magick be there, too.”

As Nyx continued to speak, her voice took on a singsong tone that seemed to mix with and complement the beauty of the orb.

A window within the soul to see

Light and Magick I send with thee

Be strong, be brave, make the right choice

Though Darkness shouts with a terrible voice

Know that I am watching from above

And that always, always, the answer is love!

The Goddess flung the glowing orb at him and it filled Heath’s eyes, blinding him with its magick light and causing him to stagger backward so that he felt himself toppling over the edge of the gorge and falling, falling …

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

Neferet

Her body ached, but Neferet didn’t mind. The truth was, she enjoyed the pain. She drew in a deep breath, automatically pulling to her the remnants of the white bull’s power that slithered in the shadows forming in the gloaming of predawn. Darkness strengthened her. Neferet ignored the gore that covered her skin. She stood.

The bull had left her on the balcony of her penthouse suite. Kalona was not within. But that mattered little to her. She didn’t want him anymore because after tonight she wouldn’t need him.

Neferet faced north, the direction allied with the element earth. She raised her arms and began weaving her fingers through the air, combing invisible, powerful, ancient threads of magick and Darkness. Then, in a voice devoid of all emotion, Neferet spoke the incantation as the bull had instructed her.

From earth and blood you have been born

A pact with Darkness I have sworn

Filled with power you’ll hear only my voice

Your life is mine; you have no choice

Complete the bull’s pledge this night

And always, always revel in his terrible Dark light!

The Tsi Sgili flung the inferno of Darkness that had swarmed to her hands down before her. It hit the stone balcony floor and pillar-like erupted up, swirling, writhing, changing …

Neferet watched, mesmerized, as the Vessel took form, its body coalescing from the pillar of brilliance that reminded her so much of the white bull’s pearl-colored coat. Finally it stood there—he stood before her. Neferet shook her head in wonder.

He was beautiful, an utterly gorgeous young male. Tall, and strong, and perfectly formed. The average person would see no hint of Darkness about him. The skin that covered his mighty muscles was smooth and blemish-free. His hair was long and thick and the blond of summer wheat. His features were perfect—he was flawless in his façade.

“Kneel to me, and I will give you your name.”

The Vessel obeyed instantly, dropping to one knee before her.

Neferet smiled and put her blood-spattered hand on the top of his silky blond head. “I shall call you Aurox, after the ancient bulls of old.”

“Yes, mistress. I am Aurox,” the Vessel said.

Neferet began to laugh and laugh and laugh, not caring that hysteria and madness tinged her voice, not caring that she left Aurox kneeling on the stone rooftop awaiting her next command, and not caring that as she walked away the Vessel watched her with eyes that glistened and glowed with an ancient, special light like moonstones illuminated from within …

Zoey

“Yeah, I know Nyx forgave him and turned him into a kid. Kinda, ’cause I don’t know about you, but I don’t know any other kid who turns into a bird during the day.” Stark sounded super tired, but not super tired enough to stop worrying.

“That’s his consequence for all the bad stuff he’s done,” I told Stark, curling up against him and trying to ignore the Jessica Alba poster on the wall. Stark and I had taken over Dallas’s room in the tunnels under the depot. I’d done some elemental zapping, and everyone had done a lot of good old-fashioned cleaning. We still had quite a way to go, but at least the place was habitable and a Neferet-Free Zone.

“Right, but it’s still weird that up until just a little while ago he was Kalona’s favorite son, and a Raven Mocker,” Stark continued.

“Hey, I’m not disagreeing with you. It’s weird for me, too, but I trust Stevie Rae and she loves him.” I squinched up my face, making Stark smile. “Even before he got rid of that beak and those feathers. Jeesh, eew. I gotta get the whole story from her.” I paused, thinking. “I wonder what’s happening right now between them.”

“Not much. The sun just came up. He’s a bird. Hey, did Stevie Rae say she was going to put him in a cage, or what?”

I smacked him. “She didn’t say anything like that and you know it!”

“Makes sense to me.” Stark yawned hugely. “But whatever she does, you’ll have to wait till sunset to hear about it.”

“Past your bedtime, little boy?” I asked, grinning up at him.

“Little boy? Are you sassing me, girl?”

“Sassing?” I giggled. “Yeah, of course. Heehees!”

“Come here, wumman!”

Stark started to tickle me like crazy and I tried to retaliate by pulling the hairs on his arms. He yelped (like a little girl) and then the whole thing turned into a wrestling match where I, somehow, ended up being pinned.

“Do you give?” Stark asked me. With one hand he had both of my wrists and was holding my arms over my head, tickling my ear with his panting breath.

“No way; you’re not the boss of me.” I struggled (futilely). Okay, so I admit I didn’t struggle very hard. I mean, he was pressed against me and totally not hurting me—like Stark would ever hurt me—and he was super hot, and I loved him. “Actually, I’m going easy on you. All I have to do is call my mega cool element powers and your cute butt will be kicked.”

“Cute, huh? You think my butt is cute?”

“Maybe,” I told him, trying not to smile. “But that doesn’t mean I won’t call the elements to kick it.”

“Well then I better keep your mouth busy so you can’t do that,” he said.

When he started kissing me I thought about what a strange and wonderful thing it was that something so simple, just a kiss, could make me feel so much. His lips against mine were soft, and an amazing contrast to his hard body. As he kept kissing me I quit thinking about how wonderful it was because he made me stop thinking. All I did was feel: his body, my body, our pleasure.

So I hadn’t really been thinking about the fact that he was still holding my arms by my wrists, trapped over my head. I didn’t think about it when his free hand slid up the extra-large Superman T-shirt I was using as pj’s. I still didn’t think about it when his hand moved from under my shirt to the top of my panties. I only started to think about it when his kiss changed. It went from soft and deep to hard. Too hard. It was like he’d suddenly become starving, and I was the meal that ended his famine.

I tried to pull my wrists from his hand, but his grip was solid.

I turned my head and his lips left my mouth to make a hot trail down my neck. I was trying to get my head together—trying to figure out what was bothering me so much—when he bit me. Hard.

The bite wasn’t like before, like our first time on Skye. Then it had been something we’d shared. Something we both had wanted. This time he was rough and possessive and it was definitely not something we were sharing.

“Ouch!” I jerked my wrists and managed to break one hand free of his hold. With it I shoved at his shoulder. “Stark, that hurt.”

He moaned and ground his body against me, like I hadn’t spoken or pushed him. I felt his teeth against my skin again and this time I yelled and, with my emotions as well as my body I shoved harder at him—channeling lots of Seriously! You’re hurting me!

He lifted himself up on his elbows and his gaze met mine. For a flash that lasted less than a second, I saw something within his eyes that made my soul shiver. I flinched back, Stark blinked, and looked at me with a total question mark that turned into shock. Instantly he let go of my wrist.

“Shit! I’m so sorry, Zoey. Jesus, I’m sorry! Are you hurt?”

He was patting my body down a little frantically and I batted away his hands, frowning at him. “What do you mean, am I hurt? What the heck’s wrong with you? That was way too rough.”

Stark wiped a hand down his face. “I didn’t realize—I don’t know why—” He broke off, took a deep breath, and started again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know I was hurting you.”

“You bit me.”

He rubbed his face again. “Yeah, it seemed like a good idea at the time.”

“It hurt.” I rubbed my neck.

“Let me see.”

I moved my hand away and he studied my neck. “It’s a little red, that’s all.” He bent and kissed the sore place uber-gently, and then said, “Hey, I really didn’t think I bit you that hard. Seriously, Z.”

“Seriously, Stark, you did. And you wouldn’t let go of my wrists when I told you to.”

Stark blew out a long breath. “Okay, well, I’ll be sure that doesn’t happen again. It’s just that I want you so much, and you turn me on so much—”

He paused and I finished his sentence, “—that you can’t control yourself? What the hell?”

“No! No, that’s not it. Zoey, you can’t think that’s it. I’m your Warrior, your Guardian—it’s my job to protect you from anyone who might hurt you.”

“Does that include yourself?” I asked.

His gaze met mine and held. In his familiar eyes I saw confusion and sadness and love—a lot of love. “That includes myself. Do you really think I’d actually hurt you?”

I sighed. What the hell was I making such a big deal about? So, he’d gotten carried away, grabbed my wrists, bit me, and not jumped the second I told him how high. He was a guy. What was that old saying? If it has tires or testicles, it’s gonna give you problems.

“Zoey, really, I would never let you be hurt. I gave you my oath, plus I love you and—”

“Okay, sssh.” I pressed my finger against his lips, shutting him up. “No, I don’t think you’d let anything hurt me. You’re tired. The sun’s up. We’ve had a crazy day. Let’s just sleep and agree to no more biting.”

“That sounds good to me.” Stark held open his arms. “Would you come here?”

I nodded and spider-monkied him. His touch was normal: strong and secure, but very, very gentle.

“I’ve been having sleep issues,” he said hesitantly, after he kissed the top of my head.

“I know you have—I’ve been sleeping with you. It’s been kinda obvious.” I kissed his shoulder.

“Not going to ask me if I want to go into therapy with Dragon Lankford this time?”

“He stayed. He didn’t leave the House of Night with us,” I said.

“None of the professors did. Lenobia stayed, and you know she’s one hundred percent behind us.”

“Yeah, but she can’t leave those horses, and there’s no way we can get them down here,” I said. “Anyway, Dragon’s different. He feels different to me. He wouldn’t forgive Rephaim, even after Nyx basically told him he should.”

I could feel Stark nodding. “That was bad. But, ya know, I wouldn’t be into forgiving someone who killed you, either.”

“It would be like me forgiving Kalona for Heath,” I said quietly.

Stark’s arms held me closer. “Could you do that?”

“I don’t know. I honestly don’t know—” I hesitated, my words stumbling.

He nudged me. “Go ahead. You can tell me.”

I threaded my fingers through his and said, “In the Otherworld, when you were, uh, dead”—I could hardly speak the word and hurried on—“Nyx was there.”

“Yeah, you told me that. She made Kalona pay his life debt for killing Heath, and bring me alive.”

“Well, what I didn’t tell you was that Kalona got super emotional in front of Nyx. He asked her if she would ever forgive him.”

“What did the Goddess say?”

“She said to ask again if he was ever worthy of her forgiveness. Actually, Nyx sounded a lot like she did tonight when she was talking to Neferet.”

Stark snorted. “Not a good sign for Neferet or Kalona.”

“Yeah, no kidding. Anyway, my point is, well, not that I’m pretending to be a goddess or anything like that, but my answer about forgiving Kalona is a lot like Nyx’s to him and Neferet. I think real forgiveness is a gift someone has to earn, and I don’t even have to worry about Kalona asking for my forgiveness unless he’s worthy of even considering it, and I just don’t see that happening.”

“He set Rephaim free tonight, though.” I could hear the conflicting emotions in his voice. I understood them. I had them, too.

“I’ve been thinking about that, and all I can figure is that somehow setting Rephaim free is going to benefit Kalona,” I said.

“Which means we need to keep an eye on Rephaim,” Stark said. “You gonna mention that to Stevie Rae?”

“Yeah, but she loves him,” I said.

He nodded again. “And when you love someone you don’t always see them realistically.”

I drew back just far enough to give him The Look. “Are you saying that from experience?”

“No, no, no,” he said quickly, giving me his tired, but cocky grin. “Not experience, just observation.” Stark pulled gently and I curled against him again. “It’s time for sleepin’ now. Lay yur head, wumman, and let me get my rest.”