Текст книги "Rock Hard"

Автор книги: Olivia Cunning

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 19 (всего у книги 24 страниц)

“Yes. I feel you. Do you feel me?”

“Yes. It’s mine. Tell me it’s mine.”

“It’s ours.”

“Ours,” he sighed in agreement and shuddered as he lost himself and spilled his seed inside her, the pleasure intense, the emotions overwhelming. “Take it, Jessica,” he cried, still coming, still filling her with more of himself. “Take it all. Take everything I am.”

“I’ve got you,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him against her. She kissed his temple tenderly. “I love you, Sed.” She rubbed her nose against his cheek. “I love you.”

He gasped and took a deep shuddering breath, his chest full to bursting, his vision blurred with tears. “I love you,” he whispered around the lump in his throat and hugged her closer. He struggled to contain his tears, but could not stop them from falling. Hopefully, she’d think those were droplets of pool water dripping from his jaw and striking her shoulder.

Chapter 36

Sed pulled the tour bus door open and hefted a suitcase up the stairs. Before he could set it down, Brian shoved him into the partition that separated the driver’s area from the main cabin.

“You son-of-a-bitch, you always think you know what’s best and just do whatever the hell you want without any consideration—”

Trey grabbed Brian around the waist and pulled him out of Sed’s face. “Leave Sed alone,” he said. “I owe him my life.”

“Trey!” Brian hugged him with both arms. Their little bromance disturbed Sed sometimes, especially now that Brian was married. “How do you feel?”

“How do I look like I feel?” Trey struggled from Brian’s stranglehold of an embrace.

Brian looked him over. “You look… great.”

Jessica wandered up the stairs, carrying the laptop case and her mammoth-sized purse. “Yeah, he does.”

Myrna pushed her husband aside and hugged Trey. “We missed you, sweetie. I’ll go make you a cherry pie. How does that sound?”

Trey rolled his eyes in bliss. “Wonderful. Sed tried to starve me to death last night.”

“You do look thin,” Myrna said disapprovingly. She went to the kitchen, opened a cabinet, and started pulling out ingredients.

“We thought you’d call for take out,” Jessica said, looking guilty.

Sed felt no guilt for abandoning Trey for a night. Just happiness. Jessica loved him. Nothing else mattered.

* * *

Jessica glanced up from the final draft of Myrna’s journal article. Sed handed his cell phone to her. “It’s your mother.”

Jessica’s heart skipped a beat. Her mother had been forbidden to call unless it was an emergency. Jessica grabbed the phone. “Mother? What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

“I thought you’d like to know that you got a letter from the University today. From the dean’s office.”

“Did you open it?”

“After the chewing out you gave me last time, of course I opened it.”

Jessica winced. “Well?”

Something inside her wanted the letter to refuse her the chance to win her scholarship back. She just wasn’t sure she even wanted to be a lawyer anymore. Mostly because she’d have to be away from Sed again, but also because failure did not sit well with her and the thought of being at the same institution as Dean Taylor made her skin crawl.

“Your probation stands,” her mother said, “but if you pass that class you failed—”

“I didn’t fail it, Mother.”

“If you get an A when you retake it, you’ll get to keep your scholarship.”

Jessica didn’t know if she should be elated or disappointed. Well, she knew she should be elated, but now she had a tough decision to make. She looked up at Sed who stood watching her as anxiously as Sed was capable of being. Could she leave him again? Even temporarily?

“I thought you’d be happy,” Mother said.

“I am.” She wasn’t. “Does it say what I have to do?”

“In addition to your regular third-year classes, you have to take the failed class, too.”

“Anything else?”

“You have to pay for the extra class out of your own pocket. It’s not covered by your scholarship. You don’t expect me to foot the bill, do you? You know I can’t afford—”

“No, Mother. Don’t worry about it. I can come up with some money. Thanks for calling and letting me know.”

“Is your boyfriend going to pay for it?”

Jessica scowled. “No. What do you think I’ve been doing all summer? I’ve been working.”

“If you’d just marry that rich rock star guy, you’d never have to work. Then you wouldn’t have to worry about all this going to school nonsense.”

Jessica rolled her eyes. How many times had they had this conversation? A thousand times? A million? “Good-bye, Mother.”

“Take care,” she said brightly.

Jessica ended the call and handed the phone to Sed.

He hugged her. “I’m sorry you didn’t get your scholarship back.”

“Oh, I got it back. I just have to pay for that class I have to retake.”

“You got it back?” Sed tugged her back by her shoulders to look down at her face. “Why aren’t you dancing in celebration?”

She shrugged. The semester started in two weeks and her time with Sed would come to an end. Myrna’s project was ending too, and she’d be heading back to Kansas City for the start of fall semester. There was no reason for Jessica to stay. No reason, except her feelings for Sed.

“I love you,” she whispered around the knot in her throat.

He grinned, both dimples in full view. “I love you.”

She kissed him deeply, wanting him to make her forget all her worries for a couple of hours and immerse herself in him. He took her hand and led her to the back bedroom, incapable of disappointing her.

Chapter 37

Jessica worried her lip as she and Myrna waited in the deserted dressing room for the guys to take the stage in Dallas, Texas. Myrna was no longer collecting data, so they’d watched every performance this week. Tomorrow, Myrna would catch a plane back to Kansas City, and the next day… Jessica didn’t want to think about it.

“What’s bothering you?” Myrna asked.

Jessica glanced up. “I’m not ready for this summer to end.”

Myrna nodded. “I know the feeling. But don’t worry, Sed will come see you when the band takes a break.”

“Yeah, every couple of months.”

Myrna’s brows drew together. “That is so gonna suck. I need to find a new vocation.”

“I know the feeling.”

“That’s not the only thing bothering you, is it?”

Jessica shrugged. “I’m usually excited when a new semester starts. But now, I’m not even sure I want to be a lawyer anymore.”

“I’ve always had a hard time picturing you as a lawyer. You’re too…” Myrna looked reflective for a long moment. “…good.”

“Don’t we need good lawyers?”

“Of course. You just don’t fit the greedy, corrupt stereotype.”

“I’ve been pegged into a stereotype since I grew breasts. No one takes me seriously. They judge me as…” She didn’t know how to explain it. Men ogled her. Women hated her at first sight.

“Too sexy.”

Jessica shrugged. “Yeah, I guess. Do you think it’s the way I dress or what?”

“Jess, you spend most of your days in sweats and flip-flops. It’s not the way you dress, you just look sexy. Your body. Your face. The way you carry yourself. Don’t be ashamed of it. Women pay plastic surgeons a lot of money to attain your natural assets.”

“I’m not ashamed, but I do get tired of being treated like a commodity. I thought becoming a lawyer might finally earn me some respect.”

“That’s why you want to be a lawyer? Honey, I don’t think there are many professions that are less respected than lawyers.”

“Respect is part of it. I really just want to help people. Protect them from all the bad things that happen in the world.”

Myrna chuckled. “You’re more like Sed than I realized.”

Jessica pulled a face. “Really? I don’t see it.”

“There are a lot of careers that help people. No one said you have to become a lawyer. You are allowed to change your mind.”

Jessica’s shoulders suddenly felt lighter. She hadn’t realized how much the thought of going back to that school was weighing her down. “I am?”

“Why not?”

Yeah, why not?

“The guys are set to go onstage in a few minutes. Are you ready to go?”

Jessica smiled at Myrna and nodded vigorously. Just the thought of seeing Sed onstage had her heart throbbing in her chest. Especially now that she knew she could stay with him. He’d be thrilled. Wouldn’t he?

Chapter 38

Jessica still hadn’t told Sed that she wanted to drop out of law school. And she didn’t have any idea how Sed would react to her proposition. She hoped he understood where she was coming from and didn’t think she was trying to trap him or giving up on her dream (it simply wasn’t her dream anymore). She loved him. She wasn’t ready to leave him to work toward something she no longer wanted. Not when she had everything she desired right here.

The bus eased to a stop outside the airport terminal. Sed opened the bedroom door. She took a deep breath.

“Are you all packed?”

“I’m not going.”

His brow furrowed. “What?”

She climbed from the bed that was covered with all her belongings and her open, yet unpacked, suitcase. She wrapped her arms around him and looked up into his tired eyes. He hadn’t been sleeping well the past few nights. She kept finding him sitting at the dining table in the dark, drinking beer alone.

“I’m not going back. I don’t want to go to law school anymore. I want to stay on tour with you for a while and then—”

“No,” he said firmly. He peeled her arms from his body and shoved her aside.

She paused, his words a slash to her heart. He just didn’t know what she meant. She needed to explain herself better. “Will you let me finish?”

“This isn’t our deal, Jessica. Our two months are up and now you’re supposed to leave.”

Deal?

Leave? But…

“You don’t want me?” Her voice cracked as her throat squeezed shut with emotion.

“The game is over now. Go back to school, Jessica.”

Over?

No. She couldn’t accept that. Couldn’t. No. He… He was…

“I don’t want to go back to school. Will you listen to me, Sed?” Tears blurred her vision. Stupid tears. They never worked with Sed. They pissed him off and she knew it. She dabbed at her eyes with her fingertips. “Sed, please. Just listen.”

He started to shove her belongings into the open suitcase on the bed. “No, I’m not listening. You are not chickening out. You’re going back.”

“You don’t understand. That isn’t why…”

He slammed her suitcase shut and pressed it into her chest. “Good-bye.”

“I’m not finished talking to you.” She slammed the suitcase down on the floor, her nostrils flaring and eyes narrowing.

“I’m finished talking to you. Get out!”

“Sed… You don’t understand. Will you just listen?” Frustrated, she hit him in the shoulder. “Listen to me!”

He picked up her suitcase, took her by the arm, and pulled her toward the front of the bus. He tossed her suitcase out the open door. Her luggage sprang open, scattering her clothes across the wide sidewalk next to the terminal.

“Sed, don’t—”

He grabbed her and hugged her against him until she thought her ribs would crack. She hugged him back, her lungs aching with unshed tears.

He’d changed his mind. Thank God. She couldn’t walk away from him again. She just… couldn’t…

He released her abruptly and then pushed her out of the door. She stumbled over her open suitcase and struggled to regain her balance. Her purse landed on the ground next to her feet. The bus door swung shut and then the vehicle eased away from the curb, leaving Jessica alone.

Utterly.

Chapter 39

Beth grabbed Jessica in a bear hug the moment she stepped into the terminal. “I missed you,” Beth said breathlessly. “Tell me all about your summer. Did you make good money stripping before you got fired?”

“No,” Jessica said.

“Are you and Sed back together?”

“No.”

“No? What do you mean, no? I thought things were going well. What happened?”

“We’ll talk at home. I’m tired.” Jessica was tired, and didn’t think she could handle talking about Sed at the moment. His rejection was still too fresh. Too… raw. She’d thought they were finally working as a team instead of butting heads in constant opposition and then this.

Jessica stomped through the terminal toward baggage claim. “We need to make an ice cream and chocolate run,” Jessica said to Beth over her shoulder.

By the time they got to their shared apartment, Jessica was no longer in the mood for ice cream or chocolate. She really just wanted to curl up in a ball on her bed and cry herself to sleep. Beth wouldn’t hear of it. She brought two enormous servings of cookie dough ice cream into Jessica’s room and interrupted her unpacking.

“Tell me everything.” Beth slurped a bite of dessert into her mouth.

So Jessica told her everything. Well, almost everything. From Sed finding her in Vegas to him kicking her off the bus that morning. She conveniently left out some self-incriminating tales.

“Why do you put up with him? He’s such an asshole. Seriously, Jess, you can do better. You deserve to be happy.”

“I love him, Beth. It’s not something I can help. I tried to tell him why I want to drop out of law school—”

“What?” Beth’s spoon slipped from her grip and rattled in her bowl. “You’re dropping out of law school? Why would you do that?”

“I told you I was on academic probation.”

“But you got your scholarship back.”

“I was thinking of becoming—don’t laugh—a nurse.”

Beth’s brown eyes enlarged until Jessica feared they’d pop out of her head, and then she fell over on the bed laughing. “You had me going there for a minute, Jess.”

“I’m serious. I can take most of the classes online—”

“Have you lost your mind? What a horrible, thankless job.”

Jessica scowled. “I don’t think so. I can’t think of a more admirable job.”

“All that time around that drug addict—”

“His name is Trey.”

“All that time around… Trey… must have addled your brains and given you some ridiculous Florence Nightingale syndrome. You’re going to be a great lawyer, Jess. You’re so smart, and you’re really good at arguing points logically.”

Jessica snorted derisively. It was apparent that Beth had never seen her when she was around Sed. There was nothing logical about her interactions with the man.

Beth patted her hand. “You’ve had a tough day. Sleep on it. I’m sure you’ll see that continuing with law school is what’s best for you.”

“I’m really tired of everyone thinking they know what’s best for me. This is my life and I should be able to do whatever I want with it.”

“Just sleep on it, okay? And promise you’ll go to the first day of classes. For your bestest best friend.” Beth offered an exaggerated pout.

“Yeah, fine, whatever. Now get out of my room and take your nightmare-inducing midnight snack with you.”

Jessica would go to the first day of classes, but just to prove to herself that law school wasn’t for her. It had nothing to do with Sed. The big jerk.

God, she missed him already.

Chapter 40

Jessica found a seat near the front of the lecture hall. Old habits died hard. Because she was taking Ellington’s class with students a year behind her, she didn’t know anyone. That was okay. She wasn’t there to socialize, she was there to decide if she was dropping out or working her ass off to get this grade up to an A. As if. There was no way Ellington would ever give her an A. Jessica knew she was setting herself up for failure. That idea settled in the pit of her stomach and started churning out one hell of an ulcer. It just seemed a shame to waste all her hard work. And all that money. Just to… fail. She took a deep breath. You can do this, Jessica. You can. You are not a failure. But she felt like one. It took a great deal of fortitude just to stay in her seat. If she hadn’t just attended an inspiring Criminal Law seminar with one of her favorite professors, who had reminded Jessica how much she loved studying law, she’d have already been out the door.

An attractive young man sat down beside her. “Hello,” he said, “I’m Curtis. Are you in this class?”

Jessica nodded, not wanting to talk to Curtis. She wasn’t too fond of men, especially attractive men, at the moment. Soon, another young man sat on her opposite side.

“Is Curt bothering you?”

“Not really.” She pulled her laptop out of her backpack and booted it up. She had a sinking suspicion that the reason Dr. Ellington hated her so much was exactly this. Excessive masculine attention. She didn’t ask the guys in the class to surround her, lean toward her, try to initiate her in conversation, but they always did. Always had. Probably always would. She considered getting up and moving to a vacant corner, but doubted that would keep them at bay.

“Would you like to grab a coffee with me after class?” Curt asked.

“No, thank you,” Jessica said.

“But you want to go with me, right?” the guy on her other side said.

“No. I have a boyfriend.” She’d had a boyfriend. She swallowed the lump in her throat. “A big, muscular boyfriend who gets very jealous.” And dumped me for no good reason.

The guy chuckled. “I can see why.”

The young man sitting behind Jessica leaned forward and touched her shoulder. “I think the three of us can take him.”

Dr. Ellington entered the lecture hall, her presence demanding instant attention. The young men surrounding Jessica sat up straighter in their seats. Jessica forced herself not to hide under her chair.

Dr. Ellington glanced around the room. When her eyes fell on Jessica, she smiled coldly. “Good morning, class,” she said. “I hope you’re ready to work hard. I don’t put up with any nonsense in my class.” She pulled her laptop out of its case and hooked it up to a projector. “I assume you’re all well rested after lazing about all summer.”

No one said a word. Already intimidated, just as Dr. Ellington liked them.

“How was your summer, Ms. Chase?” Dr. Ellington asked, her blue eyes hard and punishing as she stared Jessica down.

“Fine. Thank you for asking.”

“Just fine? I think it was probably better than fine. Seems to me you had a rather adventuresome summer. A screen debut of sorts. Would you care to share your internet notoriety with your classmates? I’m sure they’d be interested in how Jessica Chase spent her summer.”

Jessica’s soul drifted toward the ceiling. This was not happening. “No. I’d rather not.”

“Well, I’m sure they’ll look it up online after class.” Ellington turned her back and started to write on the dry erase board.

While the professor’s attention was elsewhere, every person in class popped open their laptop.

They’re just getting ready to take notes for class, Jessica tried to tell herself.

After a moment’s delay, stunned gasps echoed around the tiered seating.

Why wasn’t there any air in this room?

“Now class, this is not the place to view that kind of seedy material,” Ellington said with a cruel smile.

Jessica took a deep breath. She realized she had to deal with this stuff—she had come to terms with that—but not like this. This was too much. Why would Ellington purposefully draw their attention to it?

Jessica caught the video on the computer screen beside her. Sed was thrusting in her body over the Vegas strip. Her vocalizations of pleasure grew louder as Curt turned up the volume. He groaned in torment. “Oh my God. That is the hottest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”

Jessica slammed her laptop closed and rammed it into her backpack. She shot from her seat.

Curt grabbed her arm. “Hey, baby, we could skip the coffee and go straight to the action, if you’d prefer.”

Jessica jerked her arm out of his grasp and ran from the room. She managed to keep the tears in check until she collapsed into the driver’s seat of her piece of shit Nissan Sentra. It never failed. Even when absent, Sed always fucked up her life.

Chapter 41

On the tour bus, Sed sat at the dining table staring down at Jessica’s picture. God, he missed her. He knew that their breakup was for the best. She deserved to make a life for herself and he wasn’t helping in that regard. Maybe someday they’d make it work. After she finished school and had her career going in the direction she wanted and deserved. He clung to that hope.

Brian took a seat in the booth across from him. “Hey, you okay?”

Sed nodded. “It’s still a little raw, but I’ll live.”

“Need to talk about it?”

“Nope. How are you holding up now that Myrna’s back at work?”

“Can’t stand it.”

They stared at the table in cooperative misery.

“Is it time to head to the stage?” Sed asked.

“We have a few minutes. Did Jerry get the studio reserved for next week?”

“Yeah, we’re all set to record the first few tracks. He wants to get the new single on the shelves.”

“Are we going to add it to the show, then?”

“Don’t know. Probably should. It would help sales.” Rehearsing a new song didn’t hold the appeal it should, however.

Eric wandered out of the bathroom. “Why are we all hiding on the bus?”

Sed chuckled. “Brian and I are avoiding groupies. Don’t know what the rest of you are doing.”

“It’s been a fucking drag around here for the last three days,” Eric said.

“Sorry to ruin your fun, Sticks,” Sed said.

Sed tucked Jessica’s picture into his pocket and headed off the bus toward the concert venue. The small group of fans standing behind the bus erupted into cheers. Normally, Sed would go talk to them, but he wasn’t in the right frame of mind. Brian took up his slack and headed for the fans, while Sed was let into the backstage area of the stadium. He found the dressing room labeled Sinners and went inside.

“There you are,” a gorgeous brunette in an impossibly short skirt said. “I’ve been waiting for quite a while.”

She looked familiar. Sed was certain he’d fucked her a couple of times, but couldn’t remember her name. “I could use a beer.”

“No problem.”

She returned less than a minute later with a cold beer and a warm smile. “You don’t remember me, do you?”

“Yeah, I remember you. I’m not good with names, though.”

“Jillian.”

He nodded, still not able to place her, and took a long draw from the beer bottle. “I’m going to go get warmed up now.”

“Can I help you with that?”

“Not unless you plan on making me scream for twenty minutes.”

“That was my plan, actually.”

Sed paused, considering her offer. He knew he’d be back to his old ways eventually. Trying to bury the pain of Jessica’s absence by putting his dick in any warm female recess that would accommodate it, but not yet. The thought of fucking another woman left him cold.

“Not tonight, Jillian.”

He chugged his beer and ate a few pieces of red licorice. The glycerol helped keep his vocal cords lubricated and they seemed to need it a lot recently. He warmed up. First with low growls and then worked his way up the octaves to get his voice ready for the punishment of singing a live show. His cords were getting tired. He needed a couple of days off. He could really feel the difference in his voice after doing several concerts in a row. Tonight was their last show for a week, but he’d be in the studio for several days and the repeated takes brutally punished his throat. He needed to stop screaming so much and sing more, but the fans had come to expect his style.

Before long, the rest of the band arrived and then a roadie called them to the stage. Sed tried to get excited enough to perform, but he felt mostly numb. He hoped Jessica’s first day of class had been better than his miserable, lonely day.