Текст книги "Slow Play"

Автор книги: Monica Murphy

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 9 (всего у книги 20 страниц)

I’ve got her where I want her. I can’t even believe she’s going to listen to me. My biggest problem?

I have no idea what I’m going to say.

“So.” Alexandria crosses her arms in front of her, all defensive bristly girl. Not that I can blame her. I asked for this. “Talk.”

I glance around the short hall that’s just off the kitchen. “I can’t talk to you here.”

“You have nine minutes,” she reminds me as I hook my arm around hers and start walking. She follows, her body snug against my side and I pull her in as close as I can. “Where are we going?”

“My room,” I tell her as I lead her up the stairs. I’m determined to get her alone, beg her for…what? Forgiveness? I don’t say I’m sorry. Ever. I’m not sorry for what I’ve done, what I’ve said, who I am. This is me, flaws and all. If whoever’s in my life can’t accept me, then I don’t need them.

Seeing Alexandria sitting on that couch rendered me stupid. So fucking beautiful with her hair falling past her shoulders in gentle waves, cheeks rosy, eyes so fucking blue, like the sky on a perfect spring day. Wearing a white oversized sweater that somehow made her look virginal—like an angel.

Not for me. Those are the three words that ran on a continuous loop inside my head. She’s not for me. I’m not worthy. I wouldn’t treat her right, no matter how hard I tried. So I went for the one I knew I was worthy of—that horny chick Toni. She was all over me. I could’ve invited her to stay and she would’ve said yes. Would’ve guaranteed myself a blowjob at the minimum, a night of heavy duty fucking at the absolute maximum.

But all I could see and feel was Alexandria watching me the entire time I halfheartedly flirted with Toni. The disappointment on Alexandria’s face was clear. The disgust. Kelli was shooting daggers at me with her eyes and I could feel every single one of them piercing my skin, reminding me that I’m an asshole. A cold hearted, careless dick who doesn’t deserve a good girl.

No matter how badly I want that good girl.

I hated myself at that moment. Had opened my mouth to let Toni know she needed to go on her merry way when Shep broke us up and practically shoved Toni out the door, Jade following after them. It saved me from having to tell her no and I appreciated that. But I figured I’d be in trouble with Shep and Jade later.

What else is new?

“I really don’t want to go to your room,” Alexandria says, yanking her arm out of my grip. We’re only halfway up the stairs and I turn to look at her, fear swirling in my gut when I realize she’s headed back down. As if she’s going to walk right out of my life and never return.

“Shit,” I mutter, chasing after her. I snag onto the hem of her sweater, grabbing a handful of soft fabric as we both land on the bottom of the steps. I scoop her up into my arms—though seriously, I have no right—and pin her against the wall, the both of us breathing hard, our chests rising and falling in tandem. Together. “Hear me out.”

She shakes her head, keeping her face averted. “I should go.”

“I’m a dick.”

“Yes, you are.” She still won’t look at me.

“I’m also drunk.”

“That doesn’t excuse your behavior.”

I close my eyes and breathe through my nose, trying to get my jumbled thoughts together. Having her so close makes it hard. Makes my dick hard too. Her scent surrounds me, wild and sweet. Her soft hair tickles the side of my face. Hell, her entire body is soft as it molds to mine and I’m consumed with the need to touch her. Kiss her. Take her.

Make her mine.

“You have five minutes,” she murmurs. “And I’m not going up to your room. So you better get to talking.”

My eyes pop open and I reach for her, my fingers curling around her chin. “Look at me.”

She shakes her head once.

“If all I’m getting is five minutes of your time, the least you could do is look at me when I talk to you.” I stroke her chin with my thumb. Softly. Slowly. A shuddering breath leaves her as she turns to face me, her eyes wary.

“You make me want things I shouldn’t want,” I admit. Her brows knit in confusion and I know I’m on the wrong track. “You make me feel things I’ve—never felt. I think about you all the damn time and I don’t do that about any girl.”

Her brow relaxes and interest flares in her eyes. “Go on,” she urges softly.

Am I really going to tell her the truth? “I tried to pretend that you didn’t matter. After you ran out on me at Starbucks, I told myself I didn’t want to be interested in you, so I shut you out. Avoided you as best I could.”

“You did a really good job,” she says dryly.

I let go of her chin, sliding my hand across her cheek, up into her hair. “But when I found out you were coming to Jade’s party, all I could think about was you. Knowing you were here tonight, in my house, and Jade wanted us gone just about fucking killed me. I wanted to see you. Hear your voice, smell your perfume, make you laugh.” I cup the back of her head, my fingers tangling in the soft strands of her hair.

She stares up at me, those luminous blue eyes seeming to eat me up. “You didn’t even look at me when you first walked into the room. That…hurt.”

“It hurt to fucking see you,” I admit.

“Why?” she whispers.

I ignore her question. How can I answer when I don’t know what to say? “I don’t understand why I’m so fixated.” I lean in, pressing my forehead to hers. I see her waver in how her shoulders relax, her hands going to my chest, resting there lightly.

Just her touching me twists me up inside. I don’t fucking get it.

“You have a funny way of showing your fixation.” Her voice is small, full of irritation. I still don’t have her convinced. “And you have three minutes left.”

Three minutes to make this right. Three minutes to prove that I want more from her. What exactly do I want? I don’t know how to ask. I warned her before that all I do is take. I don’t know any other way. If I had my choice I’d drag her up to my bedroom, lock the door and push her onto the bed. Fall on top of her and never let her go for the rest of the night.

But is that all I want? One night? That’s all I should want. That’s all I can allow myself to want.

Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes and count to three.

His forehead is pressed against mine, his eyes tightly closed, a low exhale falling from his perfect mouth. He’s so close we’re sharing the same air, I can practically count the outrageous number of thick black lashes that rim his eyes and it would take nothing for our mouths to meet. A little shift here, a lift of the chin there and we’d be kissing.

But I can’t let him kiss me. Not when I’m still mad at him. I’m so tense waiting for his next words I feel like I could shatter. Fully prepared for him to say something terrible. Awful.

Like usual.

Slowly he opens his eyes and lifts his forehead from mine, licking his lips, his gaze never leaving me. “I like you,” he says in that sexy low rumble.

Words fail me. What in the world does he mean?

“Have you ever met someone you felt an instant connection to? Like, the minute your eyes met, you couldn’t look away no matter how much you tried? You go to bed at night with them on your mind and when you wake up you wonder how they slept? And throughout the day you hope like hell you catch a glimpse of them but when you don’t, you’re disappointed?”

My throat is so dry it’s hard for me to swallow.

“And when you finally do run into them, you’re so damn excited, you’re dying to talk to them, look at them—touch them. But then you realize…that maybe you want something they can’t give. Or worse, they don’t feel the same way. That maybe you’re overreacting and wanting it all when you never want it all. You’re afraid to want it all.” He pauses, clears his throat and drops his head so he’s not looking at me any longer. “So you shut off those feelings because you don’t want to be rejected. You’d rather move through life completely untouchable.”

My knees are shaking at his sweet yet sad words. Is he really talking about me? He’s afraid he could be rejected? I find it hard to believe that the player of all players Tristan Prescott is saying this.

I run my hands up his chest, curling my fingers around his shoulders, needing him to finish but unable to say a word of encouragement. What if I’m wrong? What if he’s talking about something else entirely? Or maybe he’s saying a bunch of bullshit to get me naked.

I don’t know what to think.

“O-one minute,” I whisper, my voice shaking and my heart in my throat. I’m probably being mean but oh my God, he’s been so incredibly mean to me tonight. I still can’t believe the way he flirted with Toni while blatantly ignoring me. I don’t care how sweet his words are, he acted like an asshole.

Tristan lifts his head, his blue eyes turbulent, like a sudden violent storm. “That’s exactly how I feel about you. You scare the fuck out of me, Alexandria.”

We stare at each other, the house eerily quiet, the only sound the thundering of my heart in my ears. He shifts closer, his questioning gaze dropping, lingering on my lips for the briefest, most intense moment I think I’ve ever experienced. His gaze returns to mine, and my mouth tingles in anticipation. I don’t give him my answer with words. I merely close my eyes, part my lips.

And wait for him.

He’s there in a second, his mouth on mine, his hand curling in my hair, his other hand on my waist, his hot fingers slipping beneath my sweater to touch my bare skin. I gasp at first contact, my lips parting further and he slips his tongue inside my mouth, deepening the kiss.

He tastes faintly of beer. Mint. Tristan. My hands move to the back of his head as if I have no control over them and I clutch at his hair, pushing my body close to his. I can feel him, hard and thick pressing against the fly of his jeans and an answering throb pulses between my legs. My butt is also buzzing, which is…odd.

Oh. It’s my phone.

I break the kiss and reach for my phone, pulling it out of my back jeans pocket. A frustrated growl sounds from deep in Tristan’s throat as I check the glowing screen.

Your ten minutes are up. Get your ass out here.

Glancing up, I study Tristan’s tortured expression, his hair a mess from my hands, his cheeks ruddy from booze and our kiss, I can only assume—or maybe from his confession. It took a lot of guts for him to say what he did. But is it enough? I’m not ready to forgive him yet. I’ve learned by example, considering that was my mother’s problem—she forgave my father far too easily and look where it got her? Prison.

“I have to go,” I whisper shakily.

“Alexandria,” he starts but I shake my head, pushing at his chest so he has no choice but to back away from me.

“I have to, Tristan.” I smile tremulously. “Good night.”

His brows furrow and he looks so confused I almost feel sorry for him. “What are you doing tomorrow?”

“I have to work.” And go out with Steven.

“After work?” He grabs my hand, lacing our fingers together. “I want to see you.”

“I—” I swallow hard. “I have plans.”

His expression grows dark. “With who?”

My phone buzzes and I glance at it. Another text from Kelli.

Hurry up. It’s colder than a witch’s tit out here!

“I have to go. Kelli’s waiting for me.” I push past him and head for the kitchen, thankful no one is there so I have to make small talk or whatever. I’m practically running, my hand landing on the door handle when he grabs me from behind, his hands at my waist, turning me around so I have to face him.

“Whatever you’re doing tomorrow night, cancel your plans,” he demands. “We need to finish this.”

“There’s nothing to finish,” I tell him. “I heard what you had to say.”

He stares at me as if I’ve lost my mind. “And that’s it? That’s your reaction?”

“What do you want me to do? Fall at your feet? Tell you you’re forgiven? Strip off my clothes and beg you to fuck me?”

“Well…” He scratches the back of his head. “Yeah.”

I start to laugh. This guy is unreal. “Words are meaningless when there are no actions backing them up. Prove to me that you feel that way. Don’t just tell me, show me.”

Before he can say another word I open the door and dart into the garage, spotting the bright green VW bug on the other side of the street, Kelli behind the wheel with the engine running. I pick up speed, about to cross when Tristan grabs hold of my hand, turns me toward him and kisses me.

Oh God, his lips should be designated lethal weapons. They obliterate all of my brain cells the moment they touch mine every single time. I tear my mouth from his and pull out of his hold. “You don’t play fair,” I cry, glancing over my shoulder at where Kelli sits waiting for me in her car.

Of course, she’s watching it all unfold, her mouth agape, her chin resting on her fist, I swear.

“Neither do you,” he accuses, his breathing ragged. “You really expect me to let you walk away after I bear my fucking soul?”

The air is cold and sharp, a fine mist falling from the sky, seeping through my sweater and chilling me to the bone. “You confessed that you have a crush on me. That’s it.”

“That’s it? Like hey, no big deal? You consume my thoughts and I’m fairly certain I’m obsessed with you, yet you hit me with that’s it?” He runs a hand through his hair, his big body practically vibrating with frustration. “I ruined it between us didn’t I?”

I don’t answer him, glancing over my shoulder once more. I hate that Kelli’s having to wait for me. Hate even worse that she’s witnessing all of this. “I need to go,” I tell him.

He grimaces. “Go ahead. Fucking go with Kelli and leave me here all alone.”

“Seriously? You’re going to play the guilt card now?” Unbelievable. I turn away from him and stalk toward Kelli’s car, anger, irritation, frustration, lust—all of it bubbling deep inside of me. He’s so incredibly arrogant and selfish. Everything revolves around him. He doesn’t get it.

I don’t think he’ll ever get it.

I’m on the passenger side of Kelli’s car, about to open the door when Tristan appears in front of me, like he’s fucking magic or something. “I don’t want to play any type of card.” He grabs hold of my hand but I shake him off. “I want to be real with you, Alexandria.”

“Then you’re going to have to work a little harder,” I tell him as I pull open the car door. A blast of heat and that damn irritating Fight Song pours out of the interior, making me wince.

“Get in, bitch! You’re letting in all the cold air!” Kelli yells. The music fades and I’m thankful. “Leave her alone, Tristan! Clearly she’s not interested.”

He backs away, holding up his hands like he’s given up, his expression unreadable. I stare at him, watching him walk backward across his neighbor’s lawn until finally he turns and jogs across the street back to his house. Never once looking at me.

Typical.

Climbing into the car, I collapse in my seat, slamming the door and exhaling loudly, like I’d just held my breath for the last ten minutes.

It sort of feels like I did exactly that.

“What the hell just happened?” Kelli asks as she puts the car in drive and pulls away from the curb.

I close my eyes. “I have no idea.”

“That movie sucked,” Steven says bitterly as we walk out of the theater.

“Yeah, it did,” I reply, offering him a weak smile when he looks my way. I hadn’t paid much attention through the entire movie, my mind too occupied with thoughts of Tristan.

He hadn’t helped matters. I was trying to forget him, forget that stupid fight, confrontation, whatever you want to call it that happened last night. Pretend that it never existed, but he made it so damn hard. Sending me sweet little texts all day long. Stuff like:

Good morning.

Hope you have a good day at work.

I wish I could see you today.

I miss you.

The last one had the most effect on me, coming in about halfway through the movie. I was already distracted, thinking of him, the way he kissed me when my phone buzzed. I discreetly checked it, my heart leaping when I saw his name on the screen and the words that accompanied it.

Clearly he’s toying with my emotions and like the fool that I am, I’m letting him do it. Worse, I’m falling for it. He’s keeping his distance yet remaining in contact with me, and God help me I like it.

“Did you maybe want to go hit up a bar or something?” Steven asks as we exit the movie theater, the cold night air embracing us, making me shiver.

“I don’t know. I’m awfully tired.” This wasn’t a lie. I’m exhausted after tossing and turning last night and having to work all afternoon. Last night Kelli drove me home and stayed with me in my room, the both of us snuggled under the comforter together late into the night as we talked about Tristan, boys in general and how sucky relationships are. All while sharing that tub of ice cream and watching our favorite Sex and the City episodes.

Yeah, it was definitely a Mr. Big-is-an-asshole-yet-I-can’t-stop-fucking-him type of night.

“Want me to take you home?” Steven asks.

“If you don’t mind?” I smile at him and he smiles in return, then looks away from me shyly. He’s so cute. Funny. Sweet. He’s got a nice smile. Warm brown eyes.

Unfortunately, Steven does absolutely nothing for me. I need to end this. I’m just stringing him along and that’s so unfair. I’ll be his friend—the last thing he wants to hear I’m sure—but that’s all I can be. There’s no chemistry between us.

None.

Zip.

Zilch.

Nada.

The drive back to my house is quick, filled with easy conversation and I wonder if I should try and make some chemistry happen between us. This would be so much easier with Steven. There’s no drama, no ridiculous games or crazy conversations. We have mutual friends. He’s cute without being so outrageously sexy that women will constantly chase after him. He could be all mine and I’d never worry about him straying. I know without a doubt he’d be loyal.

Determination filling me, I turn to look at him as soon as he parks his car in front of my house. He swivels his head in my direction, his eyes going wide when I lean across the center console, my intent clear. Panic flashes in his eyes for a quick second before he’s reaching for me too, our mouths brushing yet not quite connecting fully.

I rear back, rub my lips together and move in once again, pressing my mouth to his more firmly, making full contact this time around, my eyes closing just as his do too. The kiss is soft. Sweet. Bland.

Boring.

Pulling away, I study him. He fidgets in his seat, glancing out the window when his eyes light up. “Isn’t that Kelli’s car?”

Hmm. Yeah, it is. “What is she doing here?”

“She gave Conrad her number.” Steven makes a face. “He’s gonna jump all over that, trust me. I don’t know what she sees in him.”

Well, holy shit. I think Steven likes Kelli. “I think she gave him her number because she likes hanging out with you guys, playing video games.”

“Really? She’s into that? I mean, you don’t seem into that.” Steven tries to look cool and is failing miserably. The eagerness flashing in his eyes is hard to miss. “I figured you just tolerated us.”

“I do,” I say with a little laugh. “But I think Kelli genuinely enjoys hanging out with you.”

“Has she ever said anything about—Conrad?” Steven asks hesitantly.

I can’t even believe we’re having this conversation about my roommate Conrad. What cruel parent gives their child that name anyway? “She’s never talked about Conrad. But she’s talked about you.”

“She has?” He visibly brightens, then immediately tones it down. “I mean, yeah, okay, cool. So she has? What um, what did she say?”

Oh, Steven is a dog sitting here on a date with me while trying to dig for information about Kelli. “She said you were adorable.”

“Wow, really?” The panic on his face is full blown now. “Yeah, I don’t really care what she thinks…”

I reach out, place my hand over his. “You like her.”

“No way.” He furiously shakes his head. “I like you.”

“Steven. It’s okay. Be real with me.” I remove my hand from his and stare at him. Hard. He won’t even look my way but I bet I’m starting to make him sweat.

“I’m a prick,” he mutters, sounding miserable. His head falls back against his seat and he closes his eyes tight. “You’re really nice, Alex. I have fun with you. You’re pretty and nice and—”

“There’s no chemistry between us,” I finish for him.

He opens his eyes, now looking miserable. “Yeah. It’s so messed up. But that awkward as hell kiss we just shared confirmed it.”

“You’re right,” I agree. “It was bad.”

He smiles. “So bad.”

“Hey.” I wave a finger at him. “Don’t mess with my self-esteem now.”

The panic’s back just like that. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

“Stop.” I reach out and squeeze his hand before I let it go. “You better get inside and make sure Conrad isn’t going after Kelli.”

Steven’s expression relaxes. Somewhat. “You’re not mad that I like your friend?”

“No.” I shake my head. “I get it. Kelli’s pretty special.”

His eyes go dreamy and for one quick second, I wish he looked like that when he thought about me. But that’s a purely selfish wish on my part and I refuse to behave that way.

I’ll leave that particular horrible habit up to Tristan Prescott.

We enter the house minutes later, the guys cheering when they see Steven walk through the door. Conrad and Jeff have some friends over and Kelli’s sitting on the couch, her legs tucked up under her while she scrolls through her phone.

Steven, being the shy dude that he is, offers her a quick hi as he passes her and immediately joins his friends.

“How was your date?” she asks as she lifts her head to smile at me.

“Revealing,” I say truthfully, flopping onto the couch next to her. “What are you doing here?”

“Conrad texted me this afternoon and invited me over. We had a Mario Kart battle earlier but then I got bored. Then I thought I’d wait for you.” She shrugs and turns to watch the guys as they start a new Call of Duty battle. “Don’t they ever get tired of killing people every day?”

“That would be a no.” I nudge her knee to get her attention. “I have something to tell you.”

She smirks. “I have something to tell you, too. But you go first.”

I lean in close, my mouth at her ear. “Someone has a crush on you,” I whisper.

“Who? Conrad?” She makes a dismissive noise and waves her hand. “I already knew that. He tried to make a move the last time I was here.”

“Seriously?” I’m shocked. These boys may act like nerdy twelve year olds most of the time, but they aren’t afraid to go for it when it comes to girls.

“Oh, yeah. It’s all good now, especially when I told him who my secret crush was.” Her gaze goes to Steven super quick before returning to me. “I said I was madly in love with Jeff.”

“Really? Why would you say that?” She’s a liar. “Because I know who’s hot for you.”

“Who? Not Conrad? Don’t get my hopes up.” She rests a hand over her chest.

I go to her ear again and whisper, “It’s Steven.”

Kelli rears back, her eyes wide. “Wait a minute. What?”

Jerking my head toward the kitchen, I indicate we should talk in there. She follows after me, immediately going to the freezer and pulling out a relatively new bottle of Ketel One.

We go through a lot of vodka in this house, I guess.

“You just got back from a date with Steven and say that he has a crush on me. You’re either fucked up on drugs, want to have a threesome with me and Steven which is ew, so weird, or you’re serious,” Kelli says after she takes a swig straight from the bottle.

I pull a shot glass from the cupboard. Conrad’s childhood collection has come in handy lately. “No drugs,” I say as I pour a hearty shot. I need it. I’m feeling all sorts of weird this weekend. “And definitely not a threesome. God, Kel.”

“So you’re serious.”

“As a heart attack.” I fill another shot glass and hand it to Kelli. We do a quick toast before we tip the glasses back simultaneously and drink. Damn, that burns. “He likes you.”

“And you got him to admit this?”

“Yeah. Don’t ask. Just know that you have my blessing if you two started seeing each other.”

Kelli makes a funny face as she pours herself yet another shot and swallows it down. “You’re for real.”

I shrug. “Who am I to stop true love?”

“Please. We’re not true love. He’s not even my type. Look at him.” She waves a hand back toward the living room and the both of us turn to do exactly that.

Steven’s screaming from his beanbag, “Shoot him! Shoot that motherfucker!” over and over again as the other guys do exactly what he demands.

“That’s sort of hot,” Kelli says with a little sigh. “Why do I find that hot?”

I nudge her. “You’re crazy.”

“I’m buzzing from the shots, I think.” She refills her glass and slugs it back. “Okay that’s enough liquid courage for tonight. Should I talk to him? Do I look like hell? Oh God, I look like hell, don’t I? I put zero effort into tonight because I thought I was hanging out with Jeff and Conrad, you know? Those two jackasses don’t really pay attention and not like I’m not trying to impress them.”

Kelli’s so cute and rambly when she’s buzzed and worried. Kind of like Steven.

“And look at you. You’re gorgeous, all fancied up in your date clothes and here I am in yoga pants. I should go.” She pushes away from the counter and I stop her, my hands on her shoulders.

“You’re not going anywhere,” I tell her firmly. “You’ll crash on our couch if you have to, or sleep with me. Or sleep with…you know.” I flick my head in Steven’s direction.

“Ew, I’m not a slut, Alex. I don’t put out on the first date.” Her gaze goes back to Steven, the interest in her eyes plain. “Do you think he’s a virgin?”

“No way.” I shake my head, ignoring the doubt. He might be. I don’t know. Nothing’s made a lot of sense these last two days so I’m sort of just running with it.

My phone buzzes and I pull it out of my pocket to check who it is.

Hey beautiful.

Tristan.

I can’t help the smile that grows and I consider answering him. I haven’t all day and I wonder if that’s driving him crazy. I know it would make me insane so I start to reply when Kelli snatches the phone out of my hands. “Hey! Give it back!”

“Tristan is texting you?” Kelli reads over every single text he’s sent today. Nothing is sacred, I swear. “This is kind of sweet.” She looks up at me.

“I know.”

“But you haven’t answered him.”

“What am I supposed to say? Hey thanks, but I think you’re a total dick?”

“You don’t think he’s a total dick.”

“I sort of do.” I shrug.

“Right, that’s why you blew off Steven tonight and basically just gave me permission to bang him,” Kelli retorts. “Quit denying your feelings. I think it’s pretty major that Tristan said all that stuff last night. I know you’re not impressed but really? I totally am.”

I probably should’ve never told her everything that he said to me, but I was at a low point last night. High on ice cream and invigorated by Carrie banging the very married Mr. Big—such a bad move on her part—but her bad move made me feel less guilty for wanting Tristan despite every stupid thing he does and says. There’s no hope for that guy. Or for us. I know this yet…

I’m not ready to give up on him. This means I’m crazy. I have to be.

“He’s all talk and no action,” I remind her.

“He’s showing you a little action via text,” Kelli points out.

“Again, all talk. There’s no action beyond him typing.” I’m suddenly tired. And no longer interested in talking about Tristan with Kelli. We’ve already gone over this. “I’m going to bed. Don’t drive home tonight, okay?”

“You’re going to leave me all alone with the guys?”

“You’re a big girl.” I pat the top of her head. “Have fun. Make a move on Steven but don’t go too far. He startles easy.”

“Shut up.” Her expression turns solemn. “I won’t leave tonight, I promise.”

“Good. If you want, come sleep with me. My bed is way more comfortable than that couch.”

“Are you trying to hit on me?” Kelli asks, blinking innocently.

“Shut up, you wish.” I shove her.

“Thanks, Alex. You’re a good friend.” She embraces me in a sloppy hug and I hug her back, clutching her close before I let her go. “Good night.”

“Night. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” I tease.

“Which is a whole lot of nothing,” Kelli calls after me as I head toward my room.

Isn’t that the truth?

My phone dings and I grab it, smiling when I see who the text is from.

Hi. :)

Her first response of the day and it comes in at—I check the time—eleven-thirteen. Unlucky thirteen just turned into my favorite number.

How was your date?

I forced Kelli to tell me where Alexandria went tonight and she finally confessed—reluctantly. Those two were becoming close. It was sort of scary.

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Smiling, I consider how I should answer.

Let’s not lie to each other. Did you have fun with Steven?

Her response is almost immediate.

We decided we were better off as friends.

I grin. I can’t help it.

Why?

Because he’s hot for Kelli and Kelli’s hot for him.

Say the fuck what? I can’t imagine Kelli with the quiet, blood-thirsty Steven.

Are you serious?

Yeah. They’re crushing on each other.

So where does that leave you?

What do you mean?

Are they in the house together?

Yeah. Playing video games.

Uh huh. That’ll soon become code for getting their fuck on.

Where are you right now?

In bed.

I immediately imagine what she could be wearing. Preferably nothing. Though those little shorts and that thin tank would work too.

And what are you doing in bed?

Watching SATC.

????????

Sex and the City. Carrie and the girls are my favorite, especially right now.

Scrubbing a hand over my jaw, I wonder what she’s implying.

Why right now?

Their bad choices help me justify mine.

And what sort of bad choices are you making?

Hmm, I don’t know. Texting you?

She thinks I’m a bad choice. And she’s right. That’s exactly how she should think of me. This sort of thing gives me hope. Convincing me that hey, maybe I won’t hurt her. Because that’s the last thing I want to do. I’m not in this for the long run and she needs to realize that quick.

I can suggest a few more bad things we could do together.

I bet you could.

I could show you, too.

I’m sure. Are you going to try and give me the big D?

I burst out laughing. She will never let that go. What sucks is that line has worked. More than once.

Do you want the big D?

Not tonight.

My heart races at those two innocent words. They give me hope. Make me want to do something crazy.