Текст книги "Blindfold "
Автор книги: M. S. Parker
Соавторы: Cassie Wild
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Chapter 14
Ash
TWO MONTHS LATER
“Are you okay?”
Toni took my hand as we sat in the courthouse.
Daniel Trask had just been sentenced to life in prison for kidnapping Isadora as well as the first-degree murders of our parents. And the second-degree murder of his step-daughter, Lily. They’d found her remains buried in the community garden next to the apartment. Forensics put her death at around the same time she'd originally disappeared. When Trask took his plea deal, he confessed to having killed her shortly after she'd refused to help him extort money from me.
My gut churned just thinking about it.
Our mysterious ghost had been one of Trask's accessories...and apparently the smartest one of the bunch. Less than an hour after his arrest, he’d rolled on Trask and everyone else involved, singing like the proverbial canary. He was doing a shorter sentence thanks to his cooperation. It wasn’t good enough, not for me, but it meant that Trask had taken a plea deal and saved my sister the pain of having to testify. It had taken two months to put it together, and it had been hellish to listen to the allocution, but it was finally over.
“Ash?” Toni squeezed my hand again.
“I’m...processing.” I rubbed my thumb over the back of her hand.
A man turned toward us, nodding when he caught my gaze. Jefferson Sinclair had handled the case personally, never passing us off to assistants or refusing to take our calls. And I knew it wasn't just because of our name or our money. Sinclair was one of the good guys. I liked him and had to admit, if I'd been a criminal, the man would have made me leery, because he was an absolute shark.
Toni leaned into me, her head resting on my shoulder. “Let’s get out of here,” she said softly. “All of us.”
I caught Isadora’s eye, and she nodded. She was leaning on Colton, and I could tell how much this had taken out of her. My eyes met his and we exchanged an understanding look. My respect for him had just kept growing over the past couple months. He'd been there for Isadora, night and day, whatever she needed. I was still an overprotective big brother who scowled at the thought of them sleeping together, but I'd seen in him what Isadora had seen.
If any man was worthy of my sister, it was him.
As we stood up, I automatically patted the pocket of my suit jacket. Isadora saw me and managed a smile. We’d talked before coming to court today. I hadn’t wanted to do this until this was over.
“It feels kind of empty, doesn’t it?” Isadora said as we started toward the door. “I guess I wanted to face him, yell at him or something.”
“Even that wouldn’t have done any good,” Toni said, coming in between us and hooking her arms through both of ours. “The idea of closure is all well and good, but now you all have to figure out how to accept not just that it’s over, but the things you thought were the truth weren’t. That takes a little more time.”
I nodded. Toni and I'd had this talk before. One thing I'd discovered about dating a psychologist: I'd never get away with not talking about my feelings again.
Isadora was quiet. I suspected she and Toni had been talking too. I hadn't asked though. I trusted Toni not only with my life and my heart, I trusted her with the most precious thing I had. My sister.
My heart gave a wild thump. In the last couple months, I'd come far from the man I was. I knew I had a long way to go yet, but I was hoping Toni would help navigate me through it.
Whether it was by mutual unspoken agreement, or just getting out of the somber setting of the courtroom, when we emerged from the car several minutes later, we all seemed to breathe a little easier and move a little lighter.
Isadora was laughing up at Colton, and Toni took my hand, swinging them back and forth, giving me that brilliant smile of hers that made my heart clench tight.
It was hard to believe that I’d once thought I didn’t want her in my life. Now I couldn’t imagine it without her.
The maître d’ saw Isadora before me, and smiled broadly at the sight of her. News of her kidnapping had gone public after the fact, and for a few days, she’d been a minor celebrity. She’d handled it with her natural grace, and had then quietly retired from the spotlight. She and Colton were still trying to find a place, but they hadn't wanted to move until everything was settled. She was also looking at going back to school. She wanted to be a victim’s advocate. When I'd found her poring over college catalogs, she told me that this had been a wake-up call for her, that she wanted her life to mean something.
Everything was changing.
I was thinking about change all throughout the meal, and about the next one – or what I hoped would be the next one.
When the server brought out champagne, and then left us alone, Isadora linked her hand with Colton’s and leaned against him. Her poker face was shit, and she couldn't keep her eyes from sparkling or her lips from curving into a smile.
Toni looked between us, eyes narrowing. “What’s going on?”
When I slid out of the seat, her eyes widened.
“Son of a bitch.”
Looking from the ring I held in my hand to her face, I said, “That wasn’t exactly the reaction I was hoping for.”
Isadora started to giggle and I shot her a dark look before focusing back on Toni.
“I’ve been waiting on this until today was done. I wanted to close that chapter before starting a new one.”
Her lips parted, eyes wide.
“A new one that will be all about us. Together. Will you marry me?”
Thick lashes fell down, shielding her eyes. Then she launched herself at me.
I had to close my fist around the ring to keep from dropping it as I caught her and wrapped my arms around her, hugging her tight. “Is that a yes?”
“That’s a hell yes.”
Chapter 15
Toni
The house was quiet around us.
I hadn’t officially moved in, but I'd been staying here more and more over the last couple months. Isadora had been staying here less and less. She'd confided in me that she was trying to get Ash used to her absence a little at a time.
Tonight she was staying with Colton, so when Ash and I slipped inside the house, Ash turned to me and pressed me back against the door even as it was still closing. His mouth came down over mine, but when he tried to tug open the buttons on my blouse, I caught his hands.
“I’m not sure Doug’s heart can handle this.”
“He’s not here.” Ash bit my lower lip. “I gave everybody the day off. And then told them all to get the hell out.”
He licked the spot where he’d bitten me before he slid his mouth down along my jawline and began to move lower, his hand returning to the buttons of my shirt and freeing each one.
This time, I didn’t try to stop him.
When he had my blouse completely open, I started to move to help him, but he stopped me. Keeping his eyes on my face, he stripped me completely naked as I stood there. By the time he was done, I wore nothing but the ring he’d slid onto my finger just a few hours ago.
A ring I still couldn't believe I was wearing.
His lips danced across the flat plane of my belly, and then down until he was flicking his tongue through my curls. When he found my clit, I whimpered and cupped the back of his head.
“I can’t stand up too long if you do that.”
“Don’t worry.” He shot me a dark, hungry look. “If you fall, I’ll catch you.”
I groaned and dropped my head back against the door, giving over control to him. Ash stiffened his tongue and began to thrust it inside me. A few seconds later, I was crying out his name. He gripped my hips, holding me in place until I came, and then he scooped me up into his arms and carried me into the nearby living room.
When he stretched me out by the fireplace, I gasped. Something buttery soft was against my skin and I looked down at the blanket spread out beneath me. I looked around. There was a bucket of wine chilling. Roses.
As I pushed up onto my elbows and watched, Ash picked up something from the edge of the blanket. He pushed a button, and I gasped as a fire roared to life.
“Wow. Way to go, Casanova. Firelight, wine and roses. You’re going to get me thinking I’ll get this all the time once we’re married.”
Ash went to his knees and crawled to me.
“And now you’re on your knees for me.” I grinned at him.
“I told you once before, you’re the only woman I'll ever go to my knees for.” He hovered over me on all fours, leaning down to brush his lips against mine. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” Curling my arms around his neck, I tugged him down closer.
He came, but only for a moment, giving me another quick, teasing kiss.
When he pulled away, he went up on his knees and stripped away his shirt. Eyes on his chest, I didn’t notice the cloth he’d pulled from his pocket until he brought it up in front of him.
“I asked you this once before.” His voice was soft. “And I'm hoping that, now, the answer can be different. Do you trust me?”
My chest tightened as I caught my breath. I knew what he was asking, what it meant. We'd been dealing with communication and with trust, both in and out of the bedroom. I'd given him control in ways I'd never done before, had sex in ways I'd never dreamed.
But I hadn't let him blindfold me.
My eyes met his. “I trust you.”
His entire face lit up and my heart skipped a beat. He leaned down over me and fastened the blindfold in place. My pulse fluttered. I held my breath, wondering what he had in mind.
I heard a pop.
“Open your mouth,” he said softly.
I did and he pressed something to my lips – a wineglass.
“A toast, Toni. To the rest of our lives.”
I sipped the wine and the sweet red rolled down my throat.
“Like?”
I nodded.
“Let me know when you want more.”
“I get to ask for things tonight?” We were still working out the rules when it came to how this dynamic worked.
He cupped my face and lifted my mouth until I felt his lips brush against mine. “You can ask me for anything any night.”
Another deep kiss and I felt like I was going to melt. He eased me back onto the blanket. A moment later, I gasped when something velvety soft stroked down the outer curve of my breast.
Then came the scent.
The rose.
He stroked the petals along my breast, down across my belly, across the curls.
“Spread your legs,” he said.
I did, whimpering in need.
He teased me lightly, giving me only the barest hint of a touch with the petals before stroking my leg from the crease of my thigh all the way down to my ankle before switching over and doing the same to my opposite leg, but going from bottom to top this time.
I found myself lifting my hips when it drew close again.
Ash chuckled softly and cupped me between the thighs. “Want more?”
“What do you think?”
He slid a finger inside me. I would have clamped my thighs around his hand if he hadn’t pressed down on my right knee and stopped me.
“I think you’re lovely.”
He twisted his wrist and curled his fingers inside me. My back arched and I cried out. Then he stroked his thumb over my clit, and I came hard and fast.
By the time I came down, he was naked and I could feel his body hovering over mine.
“Now,” Ash breathed against my lips.
I didn’t have the air to answer, but it didn't matter. It wasn’t like I was going to argue. Grabbing onto his shoulders, I arched up to meet him. We came together, bodies sliding together with a perfection that made me moan. My nails dug into his back as I rocked against him. It was as if every cell in my body was on fire, every nerve blazing. I'd never been so aware of him as I was at that moment.
He twisted his hand in my hair and pulled my head back. He kissed me, his hunger matching mine.
“Tell me you love me,” he said against my lips.
I didn’t say it. I whimpered it.
He slammed into me harder and I was shaking from the force of the climax building inside, as he demanded it from me again.
“Tell me you love me.”
My hand found its way into his hair and I fisted it, pulling it until he growled. I held him in place until I could put my mouth against his ear.
“You're mine.”
He rolled with us, pulling me on top of him. My spine arched and I cried out at the new angle of penetration. I couldn't take it anymore. I reached up and tore off the blindfold, looking down at him.
He stared up at me, eyes dark with desire. As I watched, he reached over and dipped his fingers into the wine. He pinched my right nipple, fingers wet with the rich, red liquid, and then did the same with the left. I shivered as he sat up, holding me in place on his lap. The shift put pressure on my clit and my eyelids fluttered. When his mouth closed over my nipple, I gasped. He sucked hard, sending jolts of pleasure through me.
“Delicious,” he murmured before turning his attention to the other one.
He urged me into motion, and as I rocked down, he thrust up, meeting me with every perfect stroke. Staring into each other’s eyes, we rode each other straight into climax.
It was breathless, beautiful and perfect, and I knew that it was more than pure physicality. I loved him.
I trusted him.
I collapsed onto his chest as all the strength went out of me and his arms wrapped around me. We lay there together for several minutes, catching our breath, until I finally rolled off him. I didn't go far, snuggling down against his side as I rested my head on his chest.
I wasn't sure how much time passed before I finally broke the silence. “You know, I think this room could do with a makeover.”
Ash snorted, his laugh more relaxed than I'd ever heard him. “I just went out of my way to fuck you blind, and you’re thinking about redecorating?”
I rolled onto my stomach and shoved up onto my elbows, grinning at him. “Well, yeah. I mean, it's my professional opinion that this room is totally depressing.”
Ash raised his head and kissed my chin. “Dr. Lang, if you want to redecorate, then knock yourself out.”
“I love you,” I murmured.
He pulled me down against his chest again. “I love you too.”
I closed my eyes as he pulled me close, his arms tight around me. The fire behind us crackled and popped, warming our bare bodies enough that, for the moment, we could just lay there and enjoy the feel of skin on skin.
Fabric brushed against my fingers and I opened my eyes to see that my hand had found the blindfold I'd tossed aside. I smiled as I rubbed the soft fabric between my fingers.
I'd always thought I needed to be in control, have a plan. Now I knew the truth though.
Sometimes, letting go was the best thing I could do.
The End
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This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.
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Chapter 1
I really wasn't having the best of weeks. After a shitty Saturday night, the rest of my weekend had sucked almost as badly. Monday hadn't been any better...with one exception. When I'd gotten home from school, I'd run into – literally – a new neighbor in my building.
Finn Colson was a nice guy. Good-looking, polite and sweet. He was exactly the kind of guy I'd always been looking for. So, when I happened to see him coming down the stairs on Wednesday morning while I was rushing to get to school on time, I smiled and asked him out to coffee.
I spent the rest of Wednesday being nervous as hell. So nervous, in fact, that I actually dropped my chalk twice while lecturing on Heathcliff and Catherine. I finally had to finally tell my students to take the rest of the class to work on their homework. I saw the kids exchanging looks and knew they were all wondering why I was acting so weird. Hell, I was wondering it. I'd been the one to ask Finn out, after all. And it wasn't like I was trying to seduce him. It wasn't about sex or power. Just coffee.
At least that's what I told myself when I left the school and headed for the café where we'd agreed to meet. My palms were sweating as I stood outside the building, trying to work up the nerve to go in. This was what I'd wanted, to be able to ask out men, to have men desire me. I wanted to be able to rely on myself when it came to romance, not to need my friends to set me up because I was so socially awkward and unsure of myself that I couldn't take matters into my own hands. So why, if this was what I'd wanted when I'd agreed to Cade's proposal to teach me, wasn't I jumping at the chance to prove myself?
Because it wasn't about not wanting to prove myself or being nervous that I couldn't do it, I was forced to admit. It was about the who. As perfect as Finn Colson seemed to be, he wasn't the person I wanted to be with. A pang went through me. I shouldn't want Cade, I knew that. He was one hundred percent the wrong guy for me, and that would be true even if he felt anything for me. Which he didn't. I still couldn't figure out why he'd lied to me that last time, but I knew it had to have been a lie. He couldn't care about me and still want to be an escort.
“Forget about him,” I muttered under my breath. “You can do this.” I took a deep breath and walked across the street.
Finn beamed when he saw me, a genuinely pleasant smile without expectation. Still, I saw the admiration on his face when I walked towards him. Someone liked my teacher clothes, I thought smugly. Mr. Know-It-All had been wrong about my wardrobe.
I didn't want to consider that, maybe, it wasn't my clothes that had truly been the problem but rather the way I'd worn them before. I could feel the difference in how I walked, how I carried myself. Even though I'd worn this outfit numerous times since I'd bought it, it wasn't until now that I felt comfortable in it. And that, I realized, was because I finally felt comfortable in my own skin.
“You look nice,” Finn said as he stood.
“Thank you.” I gave him a polite smile. I was proud of myself for not blushing or brushing off his compliment. Granted, it hadn't exactly given me the warm fuzzies like I would've gotten from one of Cade's compliments, but that was because he hadn't generally just said that I looked nice. Anyone would blush at some of the things he said. It had nothing to do with how the sound of his voice could turn me on, no matter what he was saying.
“I have to admit,” Finn spoke, drawing my attention. “I was surprised when you asked me for coffee.”
“Really?” I asked. “Why's that?”
“You backed off so quickly when I suggested you show me around. I figured you weren't interested.” He gave me a wry smile. “Unless I completely read this wrong and you're only trying to be neighborly.”
“And what would you do if I said that was the case?” I asked.
“I'd try to convince you otherwise.” Finn's eyes met mine.
They really were a pretty shade of gray...green. Finn's eyes were green. I didn't want to think about dark gray eyes.
The waitress came by and took our order, giving me a couple minutes to get myself focused again. It wasn't fair to Finn that I was thinking about Cade, comparing him to Cade. In all the ways he and Cade were different, there was one that was more important than the rest and the only one that matter. Finn chose to be here with me. Now, granted, with my luck in men so far, he probably had dates with half a dozen other women from our apartment building, but there was always the off chance that he really was a good guy. And it didn't matter if he was going out with other women. There were no expectations here, no commitments. Just coffee and conversation. If either of us wanted something more afterwards, we'd bring it up then. And if one thing led to another, then that'd be fine too. I wasn't looking for a relationship. Not after the back-to-back beatings my heart had taken. No matter how perfect Finn seemed to be.
“So, Bree Gamble of three E, are you a transplant like me or a native to the windy city?” Finn asked as the waitress walked away.
To his credit, he didn't even glance at her ass as she passed.
“Native,” I said. “Born and raised in the suburbs. Moved into the city when my parents decided they wanted to retire to Florida.”
“Your parents retired already?”
I nodded. “My mom always says that I wasn't an afterthought or late in life kid. I was the 'oh shit how did that happen' kid.” I laughed, remembering all the times my mom had said that to get a rise out of people. “My brother was the late in life kid and she was almost forty when she had him. She was forty-four when I was born. My dad was forty-eight.”
“Wow,” Finn said. “My parents were the exact opposite. They were high school sweethearts, married right after graduation because Mom was already pregnant with my oldest sister. Had the rest of us one after the other.”
“The rest of you? How many brothers and sisters do you have?”
He grinned. “I have one older sister, two older brothers, three younger brothers and two younger sisters. Lisa's a junior in high school.”
I stared at him. “Nine kids?”
He shrugged. “What can I say? Very devout Catholic upbringing.”
I really hoped he wasn't saying all this because he thought he was going to try to get into my pants and claim he couldn't use a condom for religious reasons. I'd been on the pill since Ronald and I had started sleeping together, but that had been because I knew the failure rate of condoms. Plus, there'd always been the off chance that we'd get caught up in the moment and forget. Neither one of us had wanted to risk an accidental pregnancy.
“Myself,” he continued. “I'm more of a C&E Catholic.”
“C and E?” I asked.
“Christmas and Easter.” He glanced over to where the waiter was bringing our drinks.
I blew on my coffee before testing it. Perfect.
“What about you?” Finn asked. “Were you raised religious?”
“Pretty much just Christmas and Easter Baptist,” I said. “More spiritual than religious.”
Finn nodded and took a sip of his coffee. “You said you have a brother?”
“Ian. He and his wife live in Texas.”
“Do you have any other family in the city?” Finn asked. He laughed. “I just realized how completely serial killer that sounded. Totally 'will anyone notice if you go missing?'” He shook his head. “Sorry.”
I laughed. As much as Cade's confidence had been attractive, I had to admit that it was a bit refreshing to see someone who wasn't the perfect conversationalist. “You said you were from Sacramento? Is your family still there?”
“I moved here from Sacramento,” he said. “But I was actually raised in Boston. Business took me to California and then brought me here. Most of my brothers and sisters are still in Boston, but my oldest brother works an oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico.”
“What business would that be?” I asked as I took another drink. At least I knew whatever Finn's answer was, there was no way it would be anything like Cade's.
“I'm a journalist,” he said. “Technically, the business meeting I told you about the other day was me meeting a source about a story.” He took a drink. “What about you?”
“I'm a teacher.”
I felt myself starting to relax as Finn and I fell into small talk, the typical getting to know each other kind of thing that came with a not-quite-but-maybe-it-is-kind-of-a-date moment like this. Halfway through, he reached out and brushed his fingers against mine. The gesture was deliberate, but definitely the kind that was meant to feel out how someone felt rather than a promise of things to come. My skin tingled from where it had touched his, but it was a mild sensation, not the sort of knee-jerk reaction that my body had every time Cade had touched me.
No. I wasn't going to think about him. Or the way it had felt when his hands had run over my body...
Dammit, Cade!
Finn was a great guy and I should've been enjoying myself more than I was. I wasn't disliking the conversation we were having or his company, but I should've been more attracted. He wasn't anything like Cade or Ronald, which should've been what I wanted. It was what I wanted.
But I couldn't stop my thoughts from wandering to Cade. Wondering what it would be like if it was him sitting across from me. What he would say and do.
I had to get him out of my head. Had to do something to make myself stop thinking about him.
“Which apartment did you say you were in?” I asked at the next break in conversation.
“Four C,” Finn answered as he drained the last of his coffee.
“I'd like to see it sometime.” I smiled when I saw Finn's breath catch. I wasn't interested in being subtle at the moment.
“Really?” he spoke slowly, as if his brain was racing to figure out if I meant what he thought I meant. “When would be good for you?”
I emptied my cup and then reached into my purse for a mint. I held another one out to Finn. “Now works for me.”
Finn popped the mint into his mouth, then reached into his pocket and took out his wallet. He tossed a couple bills on the table that would more than cover the drinks. He stood and held out his hand.
I didn't even hesitate as I took it. This was the perfect opportunity for me to get my mind off of Cade and show that I could do the whole casual sex thing. I'd make sure Finn knew there weren't any strings attached, but if I also wasn't going to say no if he wanted to try and make it more. That's what made him so perfect. He was physically attractive and nice, so perfect for a little fling, but I could also see us really having a lot in common and wanting to see where things went.
The two of us walked back to our apartment building hand-in-hand. The wind was brisk and I could smell a hint of snow in it. We usually didn't get snow until closer to the end of November, but it was definitely cold enough. This would probably be one of the last times I'd want to be walking much of anywhere and I enjoyed the chance to enjoy it with some easy conversation. Whatever was coming, we weren't talking about it, and I appreciated that. I wanted to see where things progressed naturally and it really felt like Finn was going to let me set the pace.
He unlocked his door and stepped inside, motioning for me to follow. I stepped inside and looked around. The apartment was virtually identical to mine except backwards since it was on the other side of the hall. Well, that and the fact that this one still had unpacked boxes against the living room wall while mine was obviously very lived in.
“I haven't gotten around to settling in all the way.” He gave me a sheepish smile. “It's mostly kitchen stuff, so I can't offer you much more than a beer or leftovers from a box.”
I chuckled. “I understand. It took me weeks to get everything organized.”
He gestured towards the worn couch. It looked like he'd picked it up in a thrift store, which wasn't surprising. Most single people – especially men – weren't going to spend the money for brand-new furniture. I walked across the room and sat down. Finn followed and took a seat next to me. He was close enough that it wouldn't be awkward to reach over and touch him, but he was far enough that I didn't feel like he was crowding me.
“I have to ask.” The tone in his voice changed. It wasn't slick or anything like that, but there was a definite undercurrent of something else. “How is a woman like you still single?”
I paused, unsure about how much I wanted to tell him. I decided to keep it simple. “I wasn't up until a couple months ago.”
“His loss.” He smiled. He started to reach for me, then hesitated. When I didn't pull away, he tucked a curl behind my ear. “My gain.”
“What about you?” I asked. I might not have been looking for a relationship, but I definitely didn't want to get involved with something complicated. “You're good-looking, kind and,” I gestured around me, “you obviously don't live with your mother. How are you still single?”
“My job tends to send me on trips every couple weeks. I've found most women don't like it when their boyfriend has to leave at the drop of the hat and be gone for who knows how many days.”
I really hoped I wasn't reading too much into what he was saying. It sounded to me like he wanted to let me know that he wasn't looking for something serious and that was good. No matter how nice he was, I was getting more and more sure that I didn't want to get right into something that could be a relationship.
“I could see how that'd be difficult,” I said honestly. “I know my ex always got annoyed when I had school stuff that kept us from...” My voice trailed off and I shook my head. “You know what, I don't want to talk about him.”
Butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I didn't want to talk about Ronald and I sure as hell didn't want to think about Cade. I knew of one way I could make sure neither of those things happened.
I leaned across the distance between us and brushed my lips against his. The kiss was tentative because I wasn't entirely positive Finn wanted this to go any further, but when I saw his eyes light up, I knew he did. He put his hand on my cheek and I could see him gauging my reaction. I met him halfway and this kiss was anything but hesitant.
His lips moved with mine, opening my mouth. I ran the tip of my tongue along his bottom lip and he made a pleased sound. I tried not to frown. I was glad he liked what I did, but the moan hadn't sounded quite right to me. Finn's hand slid around my back, pulling me closer to him and I tried to put out of my head that the warm palm on the small of my back belonged to the wrong person.
