Текст книги "Berries and Greed"

Автор книги: Lily Mayne

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Текущая страница: 17 (всего у книги 33 страниц)

I wanted to wipe away all those fears and insecurities he had about his submissive nature. I wanted to go into any sexual situation that transpired between us fully prepared and ready to give him what he’d always craved—and what he’d previously been made to feel ashamed for.

Fuck his ex, I thought viciously, watching him leave the room and vanish. For the dozenth time, I tried to picture the mysterious Agma. In my mind, I imagined a tall, leggy demiurgus with a waterfall of silky black hair that probably had some stunningly beautiful jewel sheen to it. Sultry yellow eyes framed with thick black lashes. Sharp, gleaming white teeth inside a perfectly pouty mouth.

I shook the thoughts away quickly. I was not going to fall into the mindset of comparing myself bitterly to other women, human or demiurgus. Agma wasn’t a threat or a villain. She was just a person who happened to have been with Greid in the past. Sure, from what he’d told me about her, she sounded closed-minded and a little cruel, but I didn’t know enough about demiurgus dynamics, either sexual or romantic, to form a proper opinion.

Which was why research was needed.

I made a mental list. One: find out more about sexually submissive people, maybe specifically sexually submissive demiurgus, to be better informed about what Greid desired. Two…

I cast a sheepish glance at the living room door, then got up and poked my head out into the hall. Greid’s bedroom door was closed, but I couldn’t hear any sounds from behind it. He wasn’t in the kitchen. Walking quietly, I made my way up to the third floor and paused to listen. After a few seconds, my ears picked up the faint strains of the chill-out music Greid sometimes listened to while working. Then a clatter, followed by a grumbled, “Fucking emerald, stop rolling off the fucking table, you asshole.”

Mouth quirking, I hurried into my bedroom to grab my onesie. For tactical reasons. It had a big front pocket I could stuff my phone into to muffle any sounds if Greid came downstairs unexpectedly while I was watching demiurgus porn.

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Chapter Twenty-Nine

Beryl

The internet was amazing.

I hadn’t truly appreciated it since leaving the cult, mostly using it to browse recipe sites for meals I hadn’t actually attempted to make yet, and online versions of the celebrity gossip mags I’d always had a secret addiction to, despite not even knowing who any of the people were.

But as I curled up on the couch under a blanket that smelled like Greid, I’d been able to find out so much. BDSM, Dom/sub dynamics in particular—all the different ways someone could be sexually submissive. Safewords and consent, the latter of which, yeah, I obviously knew all about, but the sites I’d looked at had highlighted how hugely important it was in situations where someone was making themselves so vulnerable.

Then there were all the kinks and fetishes, several of which intrigued me to no end. Like shibari and other forms of bondage. Milking—that one sounded hot as shit. Orgasm denial and edging—I got so excited when I discovered that the thing I already knew I loved had an actual name.

One thing I couldn’t find, however, was information specifically on sexually submissive demiurgus. There was literally no way that Greid was the only submissive demiurgus in the entire world, but apparently, if it was more common, it was all behind closed doors and wasn’t really talked about.

Which brought me to my second task while Greid was still safely tucked away in his workshop.

Casting a nervous glance at the living room door, I took a deep breath. I didn’t know any porn sites, so I just searched for ‘demiurgus porn’. Thankfully, it brought up about a million results.

My eyes widened when I tapped on the first one and an ad appeared at the top of the page when it loaded. Hot, horny demigirls in your area! it proclaimed above a photo of a naked female demiurgus with four enormous breasts that sat on her chest like globes, topped with wide cobalt nipples. I’d already known that female demiurgus had four breasts, but… Jesus, those were massive.

Did demiurgus get cosmetic surgery too? I almost opened a new tab to look into it, but no. I had a mission. I couldn’t get distracted.

Not knowing where on earth to begin, I just clicked on the first video in the long list on my screen. It was titled ‘Demi MILF w/ big tits gets pounded by daughter’s boyfriend’. My nose wrinkled. Not really my thing, but it wasn’t like I was watching it to get turned on.

I still watched avidly as the scene began with a slender demiurgus—with, yes, gigantic breasts—in her humanoid form sashaying out of a pool in a skimpy pink bikini that looked amazing against her deep black skin. Then a ripped demiurgus male in a skin-tight tank and jeans—also in his humanoid form—sauntered on-screen, his black hair cut short and spiking up on his head.

“Hey, Mrs Javik,” he drawled.

“Kinar!” The female gasped, then breathed, “My daughter’s not here.”

“Well, hey, you know, that’s okay.” Kinar was already rubbing the bulge of his crotch. I winced. His acting wasn’t the best. “I just came by to—”

Huffing, I skipped ahead. When the video resumed, I recoiled and blinked at what I saw on the screen.

They were… fighting. Mrs Javik’s bikini was gone, and so was Kinar’s tank. There was an enormous bulge snaking down his tight jeans leg as the pair of them wrestled, snarling and snapping their teeth. Mrs Javik managed to get him to the ground, then scrambled up his body to sit on his face, throwing her head back and cupping two of her breasts as she let out a loud, overexaggerated moan.

Her moan sharpened with excitement when Kinar threw her off and jumped to his feet. I winced when he gripped a handful of her hair and drew her down to her knees. With his free hand, he ripped open the button of his jeans and yanked out his cock.

My eyes bulged out of my head. It was ridiculous. It was unfathomably large. Greid’s had felt enormous as well, but… surely this was porn-star dick? Surely this was above average for a demiurgus?

I stared at it in shock as he tapped the bulbous head against Mrs Javik’s lips, jerking back with a laugh when she snapped her sharp teeth around a sultry grin. The head was smooth and tapered, but just beneath it… were spikes.

A lot of spikes.

Tiny little thorny things that wound around his shaft beneath the head, tapering off in size until they melted away to nothing, leaving the bottom third smooth. I winced in sympathy when Kinar wrapped his fist around his dick and stroked, but he let out a loud groan and pumped his hips. It clearly felt good. It wasn’t hurting him. Unless he was a better actor than I’d thought.

But… wouldn’t it hurt her? I gasped when Mrs Javik snarled and plunged her mouth onto his cock, pouty lips sliding down over the spikes that flared out beneath the head. She moaned as Kinar’s thighs began to quake, but then she ripped her mouth free and gave him another savage grin, before grabbing his ankles and jerking his legs out from under him so he crashed to the floor.

He growled as if it had excited him, scrambling back up and lunging for her. I stared vacantly as they fought some more, both of them trying to dominate the other, snarling and biting and kicking each other off. But they were both really into it. Kinar’s cock was leaking everywhere, and Mrs Javik’s bare cunt was practically dripping.

Was this how demiurgus had sex? It was kind of… intense.

I skipped forward again to see Kinar plunging his cock inside Mrs Javik, gripping her hair in a tight fist. She was moaning continuously, but she still kept trying to overpower him, to kick him away so she could ride him instead.

It was like a constant battle. God, it looked exhausting. I could see how it could be arousing to some people—especially, obviously, demiurgus, if this was the standard—but it did absolutely nothing for me.

I went back and selected another video, watching parts of it before clicking on another. And another. They were all the same. Didn’t matter who or how many demiurgus there were—every single video showed them fighting, snarling and biting in a battle of wills, all of them trying to dominate their partner or partners.

And every single dick had spikes on it.

Well, damn. This had been enlightening. And now I understood why Greid had grown so flustered when I told him I wanted to touch his dick. All the demiurgus I’d watched had seemed to like the feel of the spikes, or at least tolerate it, but… I wasn’t so sure I wanted to tear my palm to shreds stroking him off.

When I heard the creak of the stairs on a floor above, I hurriedly closed down all the tabs and stuffed my phone into my onesie pocket, feeling a little guilty. I’d only watched to understand better, to see what I could learn, but… hiding it from Greid felt kind of wrong.

“I watched demiurgus porn,” I blurted the moment he stepped into the living room.

He froze, blinking once as he processed that. “I—Oh. Um… ’kay.”

“For a reason,” I said hurriedly, then licked my lips as a hint of nerves made my pulse flutter. “I think… Do you want to talk about some stuff?”

“What, porn stuff?” he asked uncertainly as he made his way over to the couch, then perched on the edge and wiped his palms down his thighs. His eyes darted over to the smoking tin resting on the coffee table.

I laughed, some of the tension melting away. “No, not necessarily porn stuff.” Although now I was wondering what kind of porn Greid watched. “But I watched it because… I remembered what you said back at the compound about, uh, demiurgus dicks.”

Greid’s spine snapped straight. His eyes darted longingly to the smoking tin again, before he croaked, “Oh. Okay.”

Suddenly I wondered if it had been a terrible idea. Did he find it invasive? I hadn’t watched it to drool over demiurgus dick. I’d watched it so that if and when Greid ever got naked in front of me, I wouldn’t make him feel awful by gawping in shock or recoiling.

Not that I would have, now that I had an idea of what he had going on, but I hadn’t known that at the time. I just liked being prepared. Feeling in control of a situation.

“I wasn’t trying to be a creep,” I told him anxiously, wanting to touch him but refraining for the time being. Clearing my throat, I nodded at the tin. “If you want to smoke while we talk about this, you can.”

He immediately lunged for the tin with a squawk of nervous laughter. “Cool. Thanks. I, um… This is weird.”

“It’s not weird, Greid. We’re different species. There’ll be things we need to discover about each other. And…” I paused, waiting for him to strike a match and light his joint. “I could sense you were maybe a little nervous when I said I wanted to touch you this morning, and I was wondering if it was because you were worried.”

“I mean, yeah.” His knee bounced as he rolled the joint between two long fingers, watching its smoking tip. “It would’ve, um, hurt you.”

I watched him. “So the spikes are sharp, then?”

His ears fluttered wildly, but he took another deep drag and said, “Not sharp enough to pierce skin, unless you were… you know. Human. And rubbing your hand over them repeatedly.”

“So how do you jerk off?” I asked without thinking. “Or have any kind of sex that involves penetration?”

“Christ, I should’ve stayed upstairs,” he mumbled, rubbing his face. A tiny hint of hurt tightened my chest.

“We don’t have to talk about this,” I said quietly. “I just thought—”

“No.” He exhaled, then finally turned to face me. “I’m sorry, I’m just… really fucking nervous. We should probably, um, talk about it. If we’re… If this…”

“Look, why don’t I tell you something first?” I shifted onto my knees and sat back on my heels. “And it might… put you at ease a bit.”

“Okay.” Greid eyed me nervously, sucking on his joint.

“So I don’t…” I picked at the blanket beside me. I wasn’t overly worried about Greid’s reaction, but it was still nerve-wracking, and an intimate thing to share. “I have vaginismus, so whenever I’ve attempted penetrative sex in the past, it hurt. A lot. But I… I don’t actually like being penetrated anyway.” I shrugged. “I have no idea if it’s a coincidence or if they’re linked. Probably the latter though, seeing as vaginismus is usually a psychological thing.”

Taking a breath, I forced myself to look at Greid. He gave me a tiny smile but stayed quiet, waiting for me to finish.

“So, yeah. If you were worried about anything…” I hesitated, then reached out and curled my fingers over his free hand. He immediately flipped it to thread his fingers through mine and squeezed. “And if you did still want… something with me, then… the spikes wouldn’t be a problem.”

I managed to give him a wry smile, but it dropped as I chewed my lip and added, “But obviously it would mean… you know, some kinds of sex aren’t possible for us.”

He cleared his throat. “Well, they wouldn’t be anyway. Because of, um, my spiky dick and all.”

I snorted, then clutched his hand tighter as I asked, “Does that bother you?”

“What?” He shook his head with an incredulous laugh. “What kind of asshole would I be if it did?”

“I don’t know.” A smile was twisting my mouth. “Some people have been assholes about it.”

He snorted. “What, some douchebag who whined about only getting a handjob from a beautiful woman?”

Butterflies exploded in my stomach at hearing him call me beautiful. My smile stretched as I leaned closer to him. “Pretty much, yeah.”

“Then they were a total dickhead. I love handjobs, by the way,” he added hurriedly. “Big fan of handjobs here. I think they’re great.”

I laughed, squeezing his hand as I teasingly said, “Good to know.”

“And I…” He swallowed, ears twitching, but pushed on. “Not being able to do that with you, Beryl… it wouldn’t make it any less, you know, meaningful to me,” he mumbled shyly. “I… I like you.”

My heart squeezed tight. God, he was so sweet. Clutching his hand tighter, I rasped, “Thanks, Greid. I like you too. So much.”

He let out a breath. “Okay. My turn. What… um, what do you want to know?”

I cocked my head. “Well, I am very interested in giving you handjobs. So we should probably talk about how that would work, but I’m also just curious. Do the spikes not… hurt?”

“Oh. Right. Okay,” he croaked, taking a long drag of his joint as his face spikes flexed rapidly. “Well, I mean, demiurgus skin is tougher than a human’s, so the spikes don’t… they don’t hurt me.”

“You mean they don’t hurt your hand? When you…”

His ears fluttered. “Yeah. But they would hurt you.”

“So what about… I mean, I saw demiurgus having sex in the porn. How does that not… hurt the one being penetrated?” I asked curiously.

“Well, um, demiurgus are tougher on the inside too.” He cleared his throat and took a drag. “What I remember from sex ed is that the, uh, the spikes are an evolutionary thing designed to… you know, stimulate sensations. They feel good to a demiurgus. And then, uh…” He gave me a sheepish glance. “Did you see any demiurgus with dicks, um, come? In the porn? I mean, like… outside of a body.”

I snorted. “They were all outside of a body.”

His mouth twitched. “Got to get that money shot.”

“So I discovered.” I chuckled, then sobered. “So you’re talking about when the spikes… um, grow.”

I’d noticed that in the videos. Whenever a demiurgus with a dick had started to come, those spikes around the shaft would flare out like little downward facing hooks, pulsing in time with each spurt of cum.

“Yeah, so…” Greid scrubbed a hand over his cheek. “When a demiurgus with a dick comes, the spikes kind of… protrude more to lock the two people together for a little while. Evolutionary thing,” he repeated. “To make impregnation more likely.”

“Right, right.” I paused, fiddling with the blanket. “How does that not hurt though? Spikes… shooting out inside someone.”

“They’re not sharp enough to pierce skin, even inside someone. Inside another demiurgus,” he corrected. “They’re actually more like blunt barbs, so the dick can’t pull out too early. So if a demiurgus tried to”—he winced—“yank free, then yeah, that would hurt. Both of them. But especially the one who’d been penetrated. But if they just wait, it doesn’t hurt. It feels good. According to, um, all my exes anyway.”

“How do you wear condoms then?” I asked curiously. “Wouldn’t the spikes—sorry, barbs—tear it?”

“You can get condoms made for demiurgus that are thicker and tougher. Or people use diaphragms, or there are contraceptive pills or implants. Mostly the same as humans, I guess.”

“Oh, okay.” This was fascinating. I couldn’t believe the people at the cult didn’t know all this, but then, we’d been cut off from the actual world, with no access to real demiurgus, or the internet, or porn or anything that would tell us about the demiurgus as a regular group of people and not ethereal sex gods.

“Thanks for explaining it to me.” I squeezed his hand. “And I’m really sorry if me watching demiurgus porn and starting this conversation made you feel violated in any way. Like I’ve invaded your privacy. I only did it because I thought… maybe if I came to you knowing more, you wouldn’t worry so much.”

“I don’t feel violated.” He shook his head, leaning forward to stub out his joint. “I get it, and I’m actually glad you did. If it’d been left to me to bring up, I probably would’ve just blurted out, ‘I have a spiky dick’ when we were…”

I laughed, lifting our linked hands to kiss his knuckles. “And that would’ve been fine, but now you don’t have to worry—I know what to expect. And… I noticed that the barbs don’t seem to cover the whole dick, so… I can still touch you. If you want me to.”

He let out a croak as he stared at me, before his throat bobbed. “I want you to. If you want to. You don’t have to.”

“I told you I want to this morning, Greid.” My gaze drifted down to his lap, arousal clenching my insides, before I forced myself to look back up and smile at him. “We’ll figure it out. There’s still so much we can do together that’ll be fun. Really fun. And meaningful, like you said. Penetrative sex doesn’t define a relationship.”

“Y-yeah.” He swallowed thickly. “Well, I actually…”

When he trailed off, I squeezed his hand. “You actually…?”

“I, um…” His voice shook. He let go of my hand to drag a blanket over his head, covering himself until just the tip of his flat nose was visible. He mumbled something into the fabric.

I chuckled, poking him gently in the arm. “I can’t hear you, Greid.”

“Fuck.” He parted the fabric a little to mumble, “I actually, um, l-like penetration.”

I stared at him, my gut sinking in disappointment. Was he saying that what we could do together wouldn’t be enough? That he’d always be wanting something more? That a relationship between us actually couldn’t work? Even without my vaginismus or aversion to being penetrated, he’d made it clear that a human would not have an enjoyable experience with a demiurgus dick inside them.

“Oh.” I sat back, but in the ensuing silence, it finally clicked. What he actually meant. What he was telling me. “Oh.”

“I’m gonna go move into my workshop permanently now.” He moved to get up, still wearing the blanket like a cloak. “You can have the rest of the house. We’ll never speak again.”

My hand shot out to grip his thigh and stop him. “No, Greid. You have absolutely no reason to be embarrassed.”

My mind was still reeling. Lust heated my blood, made my scalp tingle. Greid liked getting fucked. That was possibly the hottest thing I’d ever heard in my life.

Something inside me responded to that newfound knowledge with an exhilarating sense of rightness. Like something I’d never really known about myself had just clicked into place and become crystal clear.

I wanted to fuck Greid.

Squeezing his thigh, I waited until he reluctantly looked at me, a pained grimace twisting his narrow features.

“We can do that,” I told him, my voice husky. “We can definitely do that.”

He let out a shuddering breath as he stared at me, his thigh bouncing under my hand. His voice broke when he stuttered, “R-really?”

“Fuck yes.” I was unable to stop myself from climbing onto his lap, straddling him as I grasped his face and gave him a tongue-thrusting kiss. “God, that is so hot. I want to fuck you, Greid.”

“Nngh.” His cock jerked beneath my ass as he wrapped his arms around me, staring at me with wide, dazed eyes. “Really?” he repeated.

“Yes.” I peppered kisses over his jaw and down his neck, worrying the skin with my teeth. He shuddered, clutching me tighter. “Have you been fucked before?”

“N-not—” He swallowed thickly. “—not by another person. B-but I have… um, you know. Stuff.”

My pussy throbbed at the thought of Greid fucking himself with a dildo. Lifting my head, I stroked his cheekbones with my thumb. “So you’ve never been with someone with a dick?”

He shook his head, then made a face. “Well, I jerked off my roommate in college once. It was pretty hot, but, um, I’m attracted to women. And I’ve never been with a woman with a dick, so…”

“There are other ways, though.” I’d read about strap-ons during my research, which had definitely piqued my interest. “Have you never told any of your former partners you want that?”

He cringed. “I only, um, I only ever had the courage to tell Agma, and she… wasn’t interested. At all.”

And she’d made him feel weird for it. Anger made me grip his face tighter, so I slid my hands back and threaded them through his hair.

“Well, I’m interested,” I purred, nuzzling his cheek and pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth, right over that smile line. “I’m very interested.”

His cock throbbed beneath me, fully hard. Ridiculously huge. God, I could probably fuck him and suck on the tip of it at the same time. None of the demiurgus in the videos had had barbs on the heads of their dicks. They’d all been smooth and bulbous, with slightly tapered tips. I wanted to suck Greid’s cockhead and feel him spilling into my mouth.

“N-now?” he said, voice cracking. I burst out laughing, lifting my head.

“Not now.” I nodded at his slightly bloodshot eyes. “You’re high.”

He went still, then shot an accusatory look over my shoulder at the ashtray on the coffee table, as if the shade had coerced him into smoking it. “I’m not that high.”

“Still high, though.” I climbed off his lap, gallantly ignoring the thick length straining down the leg of Greid’s pants. “And we can’t go into anything when it’s all brand new without completely clear heads. We still need to talk about your submissive nature as well,” I added brightly. “I did research on that too.”

“Oh god.” Greid slouched back on the couch. “I think I need to go lie down first.”

I chuckled, settling beside him and kissing his shoulder. I knew I’d already overwhelmed him by springing this conversation on him, and I didn’t want to push him too far, so I said, “Why don’t we table that discussion until tomorrow, then? Or whenever you’re ready. There’s no rush. And I’d rather talk to you about that when you’re definitely not high. It’s important.”

“It is?” He eyed me nervously.

“Yes, of course it is. We need to talk about what you’re interested in. What your limits are. You being submissive doesn’t mean I just get to boss you around and make you do whatever I want, Greid.”

His eyes went heavy-lidded, as if that was exactly what he wanted. Licking his lips, he asked, “S-so you want to… You don’t mind it?”

“I prefer being in control,” I told him meaningfully.

He gulped. “Wh-what about what you want, though?”

I leaned in with a wicked smile and kissed his cheek, then murmured, “I want to boss you around, Greid. But I want to make you lose your mind from it, so I need to know exactly what will make that happen.”

“I’m pretty sure—” he wheezed, awkwardly tugging at his pant leg. “I’m pretty sure I’ll lose my mind just from you talking about it.”

Laughing, I gave his cheek one more kiss before sitting back. “Then we’ll talk about it tomorrow so you can cool off first. Or maybe later, when you’re not high anymore. You probably have to get back to work, right?”

“Yeah,” he croaked, staring into space. “I only came down here to ask if you wanted a sandwich.”

I squeezed his arm. “Sorry for springing all that on you.”

“No, it’s okay.” He sat up straighter. “It’s good. I’m glad we… I’m glad. Thanks, Beryl,” he mumbled, hand creeping over to clutch mine.

“Of course.” I raised our linked hands to kiss his knuckles. “Now, sandwiches? You must be starving. It’s been, what, three hours since you last ate?”

He gave me a mock glare. “I have a high metabolism.”

I laughed. “Sure. Well, I could go for a sandwich. Want me to go out and get some?”

“No, it’s okay. I’ll order us some.” He fumbled to pull his phone out of his pocket, lifting his hips, which immediately drew my gaze to the thick length still snaking down his pant leg.

My tongue pressed hard to the roof of my mouth. God, I wanted to see his dick now. I wanted to touch it. I wanted to see how the barbs on it swirled down his length—all the demiurgus in the videos had had different patterns. They were kind of beautiful, in a way.

But Greid needed time to process. And he was high. Maybe once we were really comfortable with each other and I knew his reactions well in a sexual situation, I’d be comfortable doing stuff with him after he’d smoked a little. It wasn’t like shade was mind-altering, it just made him loose and relaxed. And hungry. But then again, Greid was always hungry.

Tomorrow, I decided. Maybe once we’d discussed the rest, he’d be comfortable enough for me to play with his dick. Make him come.

Well, I thought slyly, watching as he tapped on his phone. Make him come eventually.

I was definitely going to be bringing up edging tomorrow.

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