Текст книги "Play"
Автор книги: Kylie Scott
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Текущая страница: 12 (всего у книги 16 страниц)
“They’re great people.” In my bedroom the alarm clock blared to life, belting out some long forgotten hit from the seventies. “I have to get moving.”
“Your legs working yet?” Mischief danced in his eyes.
“I think so.” I laughed.
“Call me today. I wanna know you’re okay dealing with Reece and everything.”
“I’ve been dealing with things for a long time.” My jaw tightened. “I can deal with Reece.”
“Hey, you were into him for over two years. I’m allowed to feel a little vulnerable and insecure about the fuckface. Stop trying to stunt my emotional growth, Anne.”
“I thought you were going to try to be nice to him. And stunt your emotional growth? How do you even come up with this stuff?”
“To him, not about him. And it’s a gift.” Given what was making its presence known once more against my hip, love and understanding wasn’t all he was searching for. “I have another gift for you.”
“We don’t have time for you to give me your gift. Plus, your good friend, my vagina, needs a rest.”
His mouth turned down at the edges and he rose up on his arms, sitting back on the mattress. He stood and offered me a hand. “Call me. I’m not trying to mess with your boundaries or anything. Just want to know you’re okay.”
Easily, he pulled me up onto my feet. “Alright, I’ll call.”
“Thanks.”
I cocked my head. “You going to call me if things aren’t okay with you regarding stuff?”
The little line appeared between his brows. Now maybe he appreciated how hard it could be letting someone into certain places. He looked away, jerked his chin.
What a pair we were. Sometimes it seemed we’d need a miracle to make this work. But my usually cautious heart had already committed.
“Thanks.” I placed my hand on his chest. “You don’t need to worry about Reece.”
“I know, I know. He’s nothing compared to my magnificence.” His fingers stroked mine and his eyes softened. “But just out of curiosity, how do you feel about getting my name tattooed on your forehead?
CHAPTER NINETEEN
I was two blocks from work when I saw Reece walking toward me through the early morning crowd. His face was set in hard lines. Five minutes late. Five. Okay, seven (max) and he came looking for me? I’d even skipped my morning coffee fix to hurry things along. Excuses ran through my mind, backed up by all the times I’d stayed late to close because he had a date. I should have kept actual figures. They would have been so helpful right now.
“Reece, I–”
“About-face.” He hooked my arm with his and spun me around to face the way I’d come. “Keep walking. You don’t want to go to the shop.”
“What’s going on?” My cell buzzed in my handbag. Mal’s name flashed up on screen. “Mal?”
“Ah, hey. Got good news and bad news. What do you want first?”
“Does this have to do with Reece keeping me from my place of employment?”
“Yeah, he called here a few minutes ago.” He made a pained noise. “Listen, photos of us at the restaurant last night got around. Someone recognized you and told a reporter who is currently hanging around the shop waiting to get the inside scoop on our lurve.”
“Right.” Mind officially boggled. Reece rushed me across a road and down another block. “What’s the good news?”
“Everyone knows about us now. We don’t have to hide.”
“We weren’t hiding anyway.”
“Good point. Sorry, pumpkin, there is no good news. Things are going to be painful for a while.”
“You’re lucky I’m extremely fond of you. What happens next?” We turned into the entry of a café. A table was available in the corner and Reece and I walked toward it.
“Reporters will probably just scrounge whatever information they can on you or make shit up, enough to have a story to run with. They’ll wanna get it out fast, news’ll spread, and there’ll be more people digging into your life. It shouldn’t be anything like what happened with Ev ‘cause we haven’t done anything crazy stupid like getting married in Vegas.” He took a breath. “You don’t do anything else too newsworthy, they’ll lose interest. Meanwhile, how do you feel about us staying at a hotel?”
“What about work?” I asked him, then shook my head and turned to Reece. It was really a question for the boss. I turned to Reece. “What about work?”
Reece raised his eyebrows in question while Mal cleared his throat. “Well, I figured you’d want to talk to him about that,” said Mal.
“Yes, I do.”
“But, Anne, for once don’t worry about the money, okay? I’ve got you covered.”
Hmm. I didn’t know about that. Realistically, though, if I was with Mal, I’d be crashing in his hotel room. My rent was paid up. Apart from the occasional meal, I shouldn’t need much.
“Okay. Just give me a minute please, Mal.” I moved the cell back a bit. “Sorry. Reece?”
“We talked,” Reece said. “He said it’ll probably be crazy for the next week or so, but then it should calm down.”
“I’m sorry about the reporter. But I was hoping to ask if I could take some time off anyway? I realize this is short notice, but given the circumstances … ”
Reece flinched and panic rose up like a tidal wave. He didn’t seem angry last night, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t holding a grudge, or he might well decide he’d had enough and fire me. Things could get screwed up pretty fast here.
But he sighed and relaxed once more. “You’re going on tour with him?”
“I’d like to. Just for a while. It would give this a chance to blow over.”
“I guess it makes sense. Though if you stick with him, this shit could be ongoing. Have you thought of that?”
“Are you asking for my resignation?”
“Of course not.”
“I’m not giving him up, Reece.”
He looked away. “I can cover you for a week, Anne. With such short notice, I don’t think I can do more.”
“No, a week would be great. Thank you.”
“You’re overdue for vacation. And I can’t have reporters hanging around, scaring the customers. I’ll rearrange the shifts with Tara and Alex.”
“I really appreciate it.”
He grimaced.
“You’re an awesome friend.”
“I’m awesome,” said Mal in my ear. “I’m so much more awesome than him, I can’t even … there’s no comparison. Why would you even use that word in reference to him?”
“Hush,” I told him.
“Be back in time for your birthday, okay?” asked Reece with a hesitant smile. “We’re still going to dinner, right?”
“God, I hadn’t even thought about it. I’ll be back then.” We always went out to dinner on each other’s birthdays. It was our tradition. Mal would still be on the road, so I could celebrate with him early. This would be a nice chance to mend bridges with Reece, going out as just friends. “I’d like that.”
“What?” asked Mal. “When’s your birthday? Pumpkin?”
“Take care,” said Reece. “You need anything, call me.”
“Thanks. Really, I … you’re a great friend.”
“A great friend … right,” he said dryly. Then he leaned in, kissing me on the cheek. “Bye.”
“Did he just kiss you?” Mal yelled in my ear, making it ring.
I winced, pulling the cell back. “Whoa. Noise levels, buddy.”
Reece moved through the crowd and out the door. Maybe we were going to survive this after all. Last night, I hadn’t been so sure.
“When is your birthday?” Mal asked.
“Twenty-eighth of October.”
“A week and a half away. I’ll have to get something sorted for you.”
“Just you will do. We’ll have to celebrate it early, though. I’ve only got a week and I was probably damn lucky to get that what with the giving five minutes’ notice.”
“Can’t believe he kissed you. Ballsy, but still, he’s dead.” He mumbled some more of what I presumed to be idle threats. “Don’t come back here, just in case. I’ll ask Lauren to help me pack a couple of bags for you. You head to The Benson, okay? There’ll be a room ready by the time you get there.”
“Thanks.”
“You’re not mad about me turning your life upside down?”
“I’m a big girl, Mal. I knew who you were going into this and I saw what went down with Ev. There was always a chance this could happen.”
“And if it keeps happening, you gonna get sick of it and leave me?”
My heart rebelled at the thought. “No. We’ll work something out.”
“Yeah, we will,” he agreed. “You’re pretty mellow after a night of hot sex. I’m keeping a note of that.”
“You do that, my friend.”
He chuckled. “See you in an hour or two. We’ll break in the hotel mattress, order some room service, and hang out, okay?”
“Sounds great.” With a grin, I slumped down in the chair. I was officially on vacation. The last vacation I went on was to Florida with Mom, Dad, and Lizzy. I’d been fourteen years old, the year before everything went to shit. And no way did I need to be dwelling on the past.
Life here and now with Mal was a roller coaster. Scary and elating. No matter how strange the circumstances, I was going to enjoy this time.
***
The dinner with the band and his parents was lovely.
Afterward, we headed for a dive bar on the edge of Chinatown. It was located down a narrow staircase, underground. Not too clean but not too dirty. There were pinball machines and a pool table, a jukebox blasting out Joy Division. The crowd had the market on slacker-hipster style cornered. Apart from a few double takes, nobody got excited when we came in. I guess they were all too cool to freak out over some boring old rock stars.
Though Sam the body guard was along, just in case.
My cell had been ringing on and off due to my newfound fame. Plenty of messages had been received, but I’d checked in with Lizzy and she was fine. There wasn’t really anyone else I needed to talk to. Ev had given me a pep talk about dealing with all the attention. To keep my head down and not feed the monster. Eventually, they’d lose interest and move on.
At the hotel, Mal and I had watched movies and taken it easy. It’d been great. Lori had invited me down to the lobby bar for a drink before dinner. She seemed more concerned about the media attention than I was. Though I’d managed to pretty successfully hide from it so far. I assured her that her son and I were doing fine. Real fine.
It had, all in all, been a great day. And this dive bar was cool and relaxed and all that it should be. We’d spread out around a table against the far wall. With a nod to one of the bartenders, Ben had ordered pitchers of beer (water for Jimmy and Lena).
“Owner’s a friend. We come here to play pool sometimes during the day,” Mal said, pulling my chair closer to his. He seemed wired, beating out a rhythm on the tabletop with the palm of his hand. The mood was infectious, keeping me on edge too.
I don’t think I’d understood how tight-knit the band and their families were. During the dinner, David and Jimmy had doted on Lori. They pretty much treated her as if she were their own mother out for a visit. Even Ben had demonstrated a subdued sort of affection. And they all seemed to respect the mostly silent Neil, Mal’s dad. Father and son had kept a close eye on Lori again throughout the evening. They practically hovered at her side. Lori had gotten tired again and Neil had taken her back to the hotel.
Yes, I had suspicions aplenty about what was stressing Mal out and keeping him up at night. But we were getting along so well. He’d asked me not to question him. Not yet. And I wasn’t ready to provide him with answers on my issues either. So I kept my concerns to myself for the time being. But judgment day was coming for both of us. I could feel it.
Only a few days out from the start of the tour, everyone seemed too restless to call it a night once Lori and Neil left. It was too early, only just past nine.
Strange looks were being passed between David and Jimmy. They’d give Mal curious glances and then talk amongst themselves. I had a feeling Mal was very much aware of it, the way he was turned away, giving the pair the cold shoulder.
“Hey,” Mal said, his smile twitchy. “Let’s go back to the apartment and break the bed some more.”
“We just got here.”
“Yeah, I changed my mind. I wanna be alone with you.” His foot started tapping out a hyper beat against the ground. “What do you say? We’ll just get naked and see what happens after that.”
“Sounds like a great experiment. Can I just finish this drink and then we’ll go? Be rude to take off right away.”
“Pfft. How often do Davie and Ev disappear at things?”
“I’ll drink fast,” I promised, before proceeding to gulp half of my glass of beer. Only a little dribbled down my chin and wet my tight green sweater. Rushing might not have been ladylike, it’s true. But with Mal wanting to get naked and dirty, can you blame me?
Hell no.
With all the whispering of wicked things stirring up my hormones, I hadn’t noticed the Ferris brother’s heated conversation. Down the other end of the table, they were all but growling at each other.
Jimmy thumped the table, making the beer glasses shake and drawing the attention of surrounding patrons. “Fuck’s sake, Dave. Just ask him.”
“I said leave it for now,” his brother answered.
Ben sat back in his chair and crossed his thick arms, saying nothing, watching everything. A new song came on, the opening chords ear-shatteringly loud.
“Yeah!” yelled one of the long-haired, heavily tattooed men behind the bar. Glad someone was having a good time. The atmosphere around the table had turned decidedly dark.
A muscle started ticking in Mal’s neck. He looked back at the Ferris brothers, his face like thunder. “What?”
“You know what,” said Jimmy, yelling to be heard over the music.
Mal spread his hands expansively. “Jimbo, I’m a man of many, many talents, but reading your fucking mind ain’t one of them.”
“What’s going on with Lori?”
Ev’s gaze darted to mine. I didn’t know any more than she did. Still.
“You on something, Jimbo?” asked Mal, sitting forward in his seat. “Tell the truth now.”
“Don’t be an asshole.” David leaned his elbows on the table, staring furiously at Mal. “We care about her. She’s lost a shitload of weight. Looks like a breeze could blow her away. You and Neil never take your eyes off her. You know exactly what Jimmy’s talking about.”
I could almost hear Mal grinding his teeth.
“We have a right to know,” said Jimmy.
David sucked in his cheeks. “C’mon, man. Just tell us.”
Shit. Mal went rigid in his seat beside me and then he started rocking. We needed to leave.
I placed my hand on his arm. He vibrated with tension. I didn’t know how to comfort him, but I had to try. “Mal?”
He shook me off without so much as a glance.
“She had a flu or something,” said Mal. “That’s all. Don’t make a big deal out of it.”
Jimmy shot forward in his seat. “It’s more than that. Don’t you fucking lie.”
“This is what’s been messing with your head, isn’t it?” asked David. “Lori’s sick. Real sick.”
“I don’t know what you two are talking about.” Mal’s laughter was a horrible thing. “This is ridiculous. Jimmy here’s probably back to fucking freebasing, but what’s your excuse, Davie?”
Lena pushed out of her seat. She grabbed the remaining half-full pitcher of beer and threw it in Mal’s face. Foamy cold liquid splashed me, and Mal snapped back in surprise.
“What the fuck?” he roared, rising quickly out of the chair.
Across from him, Jimmy shot to his feet as well, shoving a belligerent Lena behind him. Everyone stopped, all conversation in the bar falling silent. The few quiet drinks plan had clearly fallen to shit.
“Don’t you yell at her,” said Jimmy, hands curled into fists.
Mal’s shoulders heaved. The two men faced off across the table, both clearly furious. Slowly, Ben and David got to their feet. This was all going to hell in a handbasket.
“Mal, let’s go,” I said. “Give everyone a chance to cool off.”
Again, he ignored me.
“Walk away, bro,” said Ben, voice eerily calm.
Beer dripped from Mal’s hair. The front of his shirt was soaked. From behind us came a flash of light. A guy stood with his phone, taking pictures. Asshole.
Without another word, Mal turned and bolted for the stairs, almost sending a girl carrying a bottle of something flying. I just stood there stunned for a moment, useless and stinking of beer. Ben and Sam took off after him.
“Anne, let us handle it,” said David.
David and Jimmy both left too, jogging up the small, dark stairwell. Like hell I was doing as I was told.
Mal had left his jacket over the back of his seat. He’d freeze out there. I picked it up and a hand grabbed my wrist. Ev’s hand.
“Please, give them a chance to talk,” she said, getting in my face. “Those guys have been together a long time.”
I picked up my purse and held his jacket to my chest. “No.”
“But–”
I didn’t have time for this shit. What I needed to do was to find Mal and see if he was all right.
I rushed up the stairs, past the ground-floor bar and out the door. The cold night air chilled me, courtesy of the wet patches on my sweater and jeans. My heart beat double-time. Shit. There was no sign of any of them in either direction. His black Jeep was gone from across the street. They could be fucking anywhere by now.
“Shit.”
What to do? Where to go? Maybe he’d headed back to the hotel. Yes, of course. A cab cruised by and I held out my arm. Far too damn slowly, it pulled to a stop.
I threw open the back door and climbed in. “The Benson, please.”
I’d find him.
CHAPTER TWENTY
The text from Ev came at quarter to eleven. I’d been wide awake, staring at the ceiling because staring at the walls had gotten old. He hadn’t come back to the hotel. I’d been waiting for over half an hour.
Ev: Lauren gave me your number. The guys talked things out with Mal then he took off again. They don’t know where to.
Anne: Ok
Ev: Do you know where he might be?
Anne: If I find him I’ll let you know
Ev: Thanks
He might have been driving around town. But far more likely, if he was still worked up, he’d want to take it out on his drum kit.
I took a cab. Money might be tight, but I wouldn’t be waiting for him to come to me any longer. Hopefully David and co. had talked him down, calmed him. Now it was time to play my part, whatever that might be. I sat in the backseat, trying to think up speeches. All in all, I was out of wise words.
A hazy drizzle began to fall from the sky as I arrived at the practice hall. My breath misted in the cold. Ah, Portland. It never disappointed. Best weather ever. Mal’s Jeep sat parked next to the building. Thank god, he was here.
The frenetic beat of drums hammered through the building’s walls, shaking it to its foundation. A few brave bugs circled the dim light above the metal door. He’d left the door unlocked, thankfully. I stepped inside, bracing myself for the noise. Up on the stage, Mal, sitting in a pool of light, was creating an almighty storm of noise.
Closer to him, broken drum sticks littered the area. Mal had snapped an impressive amount in such a short time.
I climbed up onto the stage, making my way around to him. He sat, poised at the drum kit with eyes closed, hands moving so fast they were almost a blur. Sweat shone, already covering his upper body. Blond hair stuck to the sides of his face. A quarter-empty bottle of Johnny Walker Black Label sat beside him on the floor. The lines of his muscles and the angles of his cheekbones were stark beneath the harsh lighting.
He seemed lost in his own world, totally unaware. I hesitated for a moment then sank down, sitting cross-legged. I covered my ears but it made little difference to the deafening thunder of the drums. No matter. The clash of the cymbals cut through me. The heavy thud of the bass hit my heart. He played on and on, moving between rhythms but never slowing down. Not even to drink. He’d pick up the bottle and just hold it, one-handed, his other hand and both feet never missing a beat.
After the second slug of scotch, though, he didn’t get the bottle all the way to the floor before letting go. It tipped over, liquid pouring out. I slid over and set it upright, replacing it in its spot beside him. For the first time he seemed to register my presence, tilting his chin in greeting or appreciation or I don’t know what. Maybe I just imagined it. Then he was back to the music, powering on.
I pulled out my phone then hesitated. Ev had pissed me off, holding me up, but these people were also his family. They deserved to know he was still in one piece.
Anne: He’s at the practice hall
Ev: Thank you
David Ferris strode in not fifteen minutes later. He nodded to me, then picked up a guitar and plugged it in. As the first strains of noise rang out Mal opened one eye and saw David standing opposite him. Nothing was said. Time moved by, both sluggish and swift at once. The two of them played for hours. I fell into some sort of daze. It took me a moment to realize when they finally stopped.
“Hey,” he croaked, the words muted as if we were underwater. The noise might have broken my ears.
“Hi.”
He put the almost empty bottle of scotch to his lips and tossed some back. His gaze stayed on me. Carefully, he screwed the lid back on. It took him a couple of tries. “I’m a little bit fucked-up, pumpkin.”
“That’s okay. I’ll help get you back to the hotel.”
He nodded, sniffed his armpits. “And I stink.”
“I’ll help you shower too.” I walked over and knelt between his legs. “Not a problem.”
His hands curved over my cheeks, molding my face. Slowly, he pressed his lips to mine. “Mm, I feel something for you, Anne. Which is pretty fucking impressive given how numb I am right now.”
“It’s huge,” I agreed.
“I’m not normally like this … drinking this much. Want you to know that. It’s just …” A muscle spasmed in his jaw and he stared off into the distance.
“I know, Mal. It’s okay.”
No response.
“We’ll get through this.”
“Anne–” In a flurry of motion, he fell back off the stool. I grabbed at his jeans, trying to keep him upright. Not the best idea. One of Mal’s big-ass Chucks bumped the side of my head, which hurt. His other foot upset the cymbal stands and they clattered to the floor.
“Shit.” Footsteps rushed closer.
Mal lay on his back, laughing.
I sat back on my heels, rubbing at the tender spot on my skull. What a night.
“You alright?” asked David, crouching beside me.
“Fine!” called Mal, still laughing like a loon.
“Not talking to you, asswipe. You kicked Anne.”
“What?” Mal rolled over, grabbed the stool, and threw it out of the way. He rushed to my side, pushing David away. “Pumpkin, you okay?”
“Yes, you only clipped me. No damage done.”
“Fuck. Oh, shit, Anne.” His arms went around me, hugging me so tight he nearly throttled me. “I’m so sorry. We have to get her to a hospital and get a brains can. Brain scan. Fuck, one of those.”
“I don’t need a hospital or a scan. It’s just a bump.”
“You sure?” asked David, checking out my eyes.
“Yes,” I said. “It was an accident, Mal. Calm down.”
“I’m the worst boyfriend ever.”
“I sure as hell wouldn’t date you,” said David.
“Fuck off, Davie.”
“Parties over. Time for everyone to go home.” David wrestled him off of me and onto his feet.
Mal seemed perplexed to find himself there. He just sort of stood and swayed, frowning down at me. “You okay?”
“Yep.”
“I’m really fucking sorry, pumpkin. Wanna kick me in the head? Will that make you feel better?”
“Um, no. But thanks.”
David got Mal’s arm over his shoulders, dragging or carrying Mal toward the short set of stairs leading down off the stage. It was hard to tell which.
“Wait, where’s his shirt? He’ll freeze out there. ”
“Serve him fucking right.”
“Shut up, Ferris. You’re a whiny little bitch.”
“Yeah, and you’re loaded.”
I rushed ahead and held the door open for them. Mal stumbled and they almost fell. But David got them moving forward again instead of face-planting. Just. “I’m fine, man,” Mal said, pushing away from him to teeter precariously on his own. I grabbed his hand to support him and he pulled me in under his shoulder, steadying himself. “See, it’s all good.”
David just nodded, staying close.
“Gave my Ludwig kit a workout tonight. Broke a lot of drum sticks too.” Mal threw his other arm around me, holding me close. He really did need a wash. “American hickory. Zildjian. Made to take a beating but I must have broken eight, maybe ten. Happens in concert often but you don’t hear it. I just pick up the next one, keep going, never miss a beat. That’s how we roll. Shit gets broken, no matter, play on.”
He sighed, shifting his weight against me. I moved my feet farther apart, keeping my arms tight around his middle. The man was not light.
“I’m missing a beat, Anne. I can feel it. Shit ain’t right.”
I looked up into his beautiful face. My heart breaking for him. “I know. But it’s okay. We’ve got you.”
He just frowned down at me.
“I’ve got you,” I said.
“You sure?”
“Very.”
He nodded slowly. “Okay. Thanks, pumpkin.”
“Let’s get you back to the hotel room.”
The rain had stopped, thankfully. David stepped in again, helping Mal over to the Jeep, leaning him up against it. One of the shiny black Escalades was parked nearby.
“Man, where’s your keys?” asked David, digging through Mal’s jeans pockets.
“Geez, Davie. I was saving that especially for Anne.”
“I’m not interested in your dick. Where’s the key’s to your car?”
“Don’t get me wrong, man. I love you, just not in that way.”
“Uh, got ’em.” David dangled the keys from a finger. “Anne, you good to drive him? I’ll follow you back, help you get him up to your room.”
“Sounds good. Thanks.”
“Awesome,” Mal mumbled. He let his head fall back and closed his eyes. His mouth, on the other hand, he opened wide. “I LOVE YOU, ANNE!”
I jumped, somewhat startled by the noise. “Holy shit.”
“I LOVE YOU.”
David just looked at me with one eyebrow raised.
“Huh. He is really drunk,” I said, and David half-smiled. Best just to ignore my mini heart attack over Mal saying those words.
“I FUCKING LOVE YOU, ANNE.”
“Yeah, okay. Shut up now.” David tried to slap a hand over Mal’s mouth.
“AAAAAAANNNNNE!” My name was a long, drawn-out howling kind of noise, muffled at the last when David managed to cover his mouth. Muted grunts and snarling came next.
“God damn it,” swore David. “He just fucking bit me.”
“My love shall not be silenced!”
I did my best not to laugh. “Mal? I’ve got a headache from you accidentally kicking me in the head. Do you mind being quiet?”
“Oh, shit, fuck, okay. Sorry, pumpkin. So sorry.” He stared up at the sky. “Look, Anne, stars and shit. It’s beautiful, right?”
I looked up and sure enough the clouds had parted, allowing a couple of brave stars to shine through. “Right. Let’s go back to the hotel now.”
“Mm, yeah, let’s go. I have something in my pants I want to show you.” His clumsy fingers started in on the waist of his jeans. “Look, it’s real important.”
I grabbed his fingers, squeezed them tight. “That’s great. Show me back at our hotel room, okay?”
“Okay.” Mal happy sighed. The air around him consisted solidly of scotch fumes.
“Thanks for texting Ev.” David pulled open the passenger side door, grabbed Mal’s arm, and proceeded to shove him into the car. “You think tonight was fun, wait till we go on tour. Then things’ll get interesting. First time ever there’s been girlfriends or wives along.”
“The way you say that … should I be afraid?”
Mal hammered on the passenger side window. “Anne, my pants itch. I think I’m allergic to them. Come help me take ’em off.”
We both ignored him.
David scratched his head. “Think it’ll be a learning curve for all of us, yeah?”
“Yeah.” The future was a big, ripe ball of I had no damn clue what would happen. And for once, that was okay.