Текст книги "Face of Death"

Автор книги: Kelly Hashway

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Текущая страница: 3 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

Chapter 5

No. There had to be a mistake. Matt was a good person. He was perfect. He’d never hurt anyone. If anyone should end up in the Elysian Fields, it was him. I moved toward him, determined to prove my eyes were deceiving me. It had to be someone who looked like Matt. Looked like him but wasn’t him. That was the only explanation that made sense to me.

“Jodi.” Alex reached for my arm as he followed. “Don’t. Please, don’t.” He gently tugged on my arm, making me turn to him and breaking me from the spell that had taken hold over my body.

“It can’t be him.” My words shook with the threat of tears. “He was too good to end up here. I have to prove to myself that it’s not him.”

Alex pulled me to him, wrapping his arms around me. I buried my head in his chest, breathing in the scent I knew so well. Alex. My Alex. He was home to me—even here. When I was with him, everything else seemed to fade away. Nothing else was important. He stroked my hair and kissed the top of my head.

“Don’t torture yourself. Hades is doing enough of that. These Fields are supposed to be a break for us. A place where we can rest for a little while.”

His words didn’t completely register. All I was hearing was that he didn’t want me to go to Matt. Not because he was jealous. Not because he worried I still had feelings for him. Alex didn’t want me going to Matt because then I’d see it really was him. It wasn’t a mistake. Instead of being happy in his afterlife in the Elysian Fields, Matt was living like a zombie, wandering around the asphodels.

I pulled away from Alex, looking him in the eyes. “This is my fault, isn’t it?”

“What?” He shook his head. “Jodi, no.”

“Yes, it is. Matt’s judgment, the one that placed him here, it was based on me—his connection to me. I’m sure of it. Hades is punishing me by punishing him.”

“Can he do that?” Leticia asked, coming up behind us with the rest of the group following her.

I looked to Tony, hoping he knew. He shrugged. “He’s the god of the underworld. There’s nothing he can’t do here. I mean, he raised Matt that night in the cemetery, and from what I was told, Matt wasn’t anything like the last time you’d seen him.”

No, he wasn’t. When I’d killed him with my kiss, I’d raised him without knowing what I was doing. I’d brought him back wrong, as a bunny-eating zombie. Hades had brought Matt back human again and very much alive. Until my tears killed him again. Now Matt was here. It had to be my fault.

“Do you think he was in the Elysian Fields when Hades raised him?” I stared at Tony, but he looked away. “Tell me! I need to know if I did this to him.”

Tony sighed, and when he raised his eyes to meet mine, they were full of sympathy. “No one can say that for sure. Only Hades knows.”

“No, someone else here would know. Victoria, maybe.”

Alex rubbed my arms, trying to ease the tension that had worked its way through my entire body. “Victoria and the others are in Tartarus. Believe me, they didn’t see Matt.”

I turned to Alex for a moment before looking in Matt’s direction again. “Abby came here to get us. If she can leave Tartarus, the others probably can, too.”

Alex turned my chin back toward him, taking my eyes off Matt. “Abby only came here to get us. Hades sent her. I doubt he does stuff like that often. He hates Abby and the others just as much as he hates us.”

“Does he? Because they seem to be having a great old time punishing souls. They don’t seem to be in much pain at all.” I looked toward Matt again. “He doesn’t deserve this.”

Alex’s shoulders dropped when he realized I wasn’t letting this go. “He’s not going to be able to talk to you, Jodi. Look at all the souls here. They’re completely spaced out. He won’t even know who you are. He probably doesn’t even know who he is.”

“Alex is right,” Tony said. “Going to Matt is only going to torture you more.”

I didn’t care. I had to see him. I had to make sure he wasn’t suffering here. “I need to do this. I know you don’t understand, but I just have to talk to him. Even if he doesn’t respond, there are things I need to say. I won’t have closure until I do this.”

Alex closed his eyes, exhaling loudly and nodding. “Go.”

I reached up on my toes and kissed him. “Thank you.”

He squeezed my hands. “I deserve serious brownie points for this.”

He was right. He deserved credit for a lot of things. I reached up and kissed him again. “Major brownie points. Got it.” I let go of Alex and took a deep breath, bracing myself for the worst. Matt wasn’t going to recognize me. He might not even acknowledge me.

I forced my feet to move in his direction, which wasn’t easy considering Matt was walking in a strange circular pattern. I wasn’t sure what to do, how to approach him, so I fell in step with him, making the crazy pattern.

“Matt?” I kept my voice gentle, not wanting to startle him. He didn’t respond. “Matt, it’s me, Jodi.”

At the mention of my name, he stopped. He did remember me! “Can you look at me?”

He was almost in a trance, staring out over the asphodels. I gently reached for his arm, and he jumped at the contact. I pulled away, afraid I’d scared him, but he turned and faced me. His eyes were glazed over, and he seemed to be looking through me rather than at me.

“Matt? Do you know who I am?”

“Jodi.” My name was so quiet coming from his lips, like a distant memory, which was all I was to him now.

“Yes, Jodi.” I choked back tears. “I was your girlfriend before you came here.”

He didn’t say a word. His head cocked to the side for a second, like he was trying to understand, but his brain wouldn’t process the words. He shook his head in frustration.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to remember. I just want to tell you that I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I really did care about you, and I think I even could’ve loved you if we’d had more time together.”

“Where?” he mumbled.

“Where what?” I looked around, wondering if he was talking about this place. “Where are we? Is that what you’re asking?”

He didn’t respond, but I went on anyway. “This place is called the Fields of Asphodel. You’re in the afterlife, Matt.”

“Gone. Happy. All gone.”

My insides twisted at his broken speech. This place was turning him into a mindless soul. It wasn’t just his speech that was broken. He was broken. A shell of who he once was.

“Warmth. Light.”

Was he talking about before he died? Was he wondering why everything was so colorless and cold here? “You aren’t alive anymore, Matt. You…died. I’m so sorry.”

“Not here. Somewhere else. You.” Finally his eyes found mine—really connected. He was seeing me now. “Then gone. Now here.”

“Yes, Matt. I’m so sorry. We were in my backyard. You kissed me, and now…this is your afterlife.”

“No. Found happiness. Gone now.”

Alex had crept up on us, probably because he noticed Matt was actually talking to me—not that I was making any sense of what he was saying. He waved Tony over with a strange look on his face. Did he know what Matt was talking about? The two of them whispered for a moment before Tony approached Matt and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Matt, my name is Tony. I’m a friend of Jodi’s.”

“Jodi,” Matt said.

“Yes, that’s right. Can you tell me if you were somewhere else before you came here? Were you in another afterlife?”

Matt nodded. “Warm. Happy. Not here. Can’t find it.”

My throat closed. Matt was wandering in circles, looking for the Elysian Fields. I knew it. That was where he’d been when Hades brought him back to the cemetery that night. He’d ripped him out of his own version of Heaven, and when I killed Matt again, Hades had sent him here. It wasn’t fair. I had to fix this.

“Matt, I’m going to make this up to you. We’ll find your Heaven again. I promise.”

Tony shook his head at me. “Jodi, you can’t promise that. How do you intend to convince Hades to move Matt to the Elysian Fields? If he’s really using Matt to torture you more, he’ll never listen to reason.”

He was right, and I had no idea how to get to the Elysian Fields anyway. Every time we’d traveled from place to place down here, Hades had us covered in his swirl of black smoke or took control over our bodies, so we only went where he wanted and saw what he wanted. I didn’t even know which direction the Elysian Fields were in.

“I’m not leaving him here. I can’t. This is too much.” My blood boiled under my skin as it mixed in anticipation of using my powers. Only I had nothing to use my powers on. Did I? Then, it hit me. If I wanted Matt to get out of here, I was going to have to do it myself. I was going to have to raise him.

“Jodi, please calm down. I know this isn’t what you wanted, but we have enough to deal with right now. Matt isn’t hurting here.” Alex was trying to reason with me, but he was missing one key thing. Matt was hurting.

“He is, Alex. He’s in pain because he used to be in Heaven. He used to be happy. Hades took that away from him because of me. If I can’t get him back there, then I’ll get him out of here.”

Alex wrinkled his brow. “You’re talking in riddles.”

Great, a little trick I’d learned from all the Ophi prophecies about me, no doubt.

“Jodi.” Tony was trying to use kid gloves on me, talking slowly and keeping his voice gentle. “This is one thing you are just going to have to accept, to let go.”

“No.” My mind was made up. I wasn’t letting this go. I wasn’t going to accept this. Matt deserved better, and I was going to give it to him.

Alex took my face in his hands. “That part of your life is over. I know that hurts sometimes, but you have to move on.” His eyes pleaded with me. I knew how this looked to him. Like I was worrying about yet another guy who wasn’t him. I didn’t want him to feel that way. I loved Alex. He was everything to me. But Matt was in here because of me, and I had the power to do something about it. I couldn’t just ignore that to keep Alex from getting his feelings hurt. We were talking about eternity versus a moment of unhappiness. I wouldn’t damn Matt to this place for the rest of time to keep Alex from a little discomfort. It wasn’t fair.

“Tony, can I have a minute alone with Alex, please?”

He looked back and forth between us and then at Matt, who obviously had gotten tired of standing there and had wandered off again in his circular pattern. “I’ll be right over there if you need me.” I wasn’t sure who he was talking to. Did he think Alex would need help getting me to listen to reason?

As soon as he was out of earshot, I hugged Alex and said, “Do you trust me?”

He pulled away slightly. “Don’t make this into a trust thing.”

“When you hear what I have in mind, you’ll understand what I mean.”

“Let me do one thing before you tell me, because I have a feeling I’m going to get royally pissed, and I need to do something first.” He leaned down, pressing his lips to mine. My blood tingled throughout my body in response to him. I knew he didn’t need it, and I hoped he wouldn’t think I was using my blood to sway his opinion at all, but I allowed my power to transfer to him. He instantly deepened the kiss, pulling me closer.

I didn’t want him to stop, but I had to talk to him. I had to say this before I lost my nerve. When he kissed me like this, my mind became mush. All I could think about was him, and I could already feel thoughts of Matt slipping away.

I pulled my mouth from his. “Alex.” He tried to find my lips again, but I turned away. He found my neck instead, trailing his lips down to my collarbone. I couldn’t think straight. I shivered from the chills he was sending down my spine. My lips found his. The more he kissed me, the more power I sent him. It was my body’s natural reaction to the pleasure he was causing me.

I was losing this battle of wills. I forgot about Matt. I forgot about my plan to get us out of here. My fingers found Alex’s hair, weaving through his unruly and totally sexy dirty-blond locks. His lips found my neck, making me moan. The world stood still. I may have been in the underworld, but I was in Heaven with Alex.

Something bumped into me, and I turned slightly to see Matt. He’d broken his pattern and walked right into me. Alex continued to kiss any part of me his lips could find. I gently pushed him away.

“Alex.” He tried to pull me to him. “Alex.” I was firmer this time, but he still wasn’t stopping.

“Jodi,” Matt said. I nearly fainted. He’d said my name, without me talking to him first.

Alex stopped, jolted back to reality by the sound of my name coming from Matt. Alex looked at me, completely confused.

“He walked into us.” I felt my cheeks redden. Matt may not have been totally coherent, but having my ex-boyfriend walk into me kissing my new boyfriend still felt awkward as all hell.

“He recognized you again.” Alex wasn’t happy about this. Part of me wanted to go back to kissing him and make him forget about Matt and the way he held onto my memory. But if Matt was reaching out to me, it meant my plan might actually have a shot.

“I know. It’s weird, right? He isn’t like the others here. He remembers. I think it’s because he’s not supposed to be here.”

“Please, don’t start that again. I was hoping you’d forget whatever it was you were planning after—”

“You kissed me? Was that your plan, to make me forget Matt?” I wasn’t really mad at Alex. He was desperate. He’d already lost me once, and he was trying everything he could to keep it from happening again. I pressed my hand to his chest and sighed, letting him know I wasn’t angry. “I just wish you’d understand how much I love you.”

Alex lowered his eyes. “Loving you isn’t that easy. There’s always something or someone competing with me for your attention. I just want it to be you and me.”

God, I hated being the Chosen One sometimes. Why couldn’t I just be a normal girl with a normal boyfriend? No. I knew the answer to that. I wouldn’t have Alex. In the end, he was the one I wanted. All of this would be worth it, as long as I had Alex.

“I want that, too. I’m going to do everything I can to make that happen. But first, there’s something else I have to do.” I took a deep breath, preparing for Alex’s outburst at what I was about to say. “I have to raise Matt. I want to take him with me when I raise my human soul.”

Chapter 6

Alex burst out laughing. I actually had to back up because he doubled over and grabbed his gut. The others rushed over to see what was going on. Exactly what I wanted to know.

“Is he okay?” McKenzie asked.

Lexi’s eyes widened as she shook her head at Alex. “He looks hysterical, and I don’t mean funny. He looks like he’s having a fit or something.”

“Alex.” I waited for him to stop laughing and explain the joke I’d clearly missed.

“I’m sorry.” He was breathing heavily, and his face was bright red.

“What was so funny?” Did he really think I’d been joking?

“Absolutely nothing.” He looked at me, and all the warmth left his face. “I just had to laugh because, otherwise, I would’ve flipped out and attacked poor old zombie-Matt over here.”

Matt was still standing by my side. He didn’t seem to comprehend anything that was going on around him—not that I did either.

“He’s not a zombie. Please, don’t call him that.”

“I know he’s not. I’m not mad at him. He’s just the next in a long line of guys who have come between us.”

“That’s not fair. You know that’s not true. The only guys who have come between us are Matt and Chase. And you can’t even really include Matt because he and I were together before you and I were. If anything, you—”

Alex put his hand up to stop me. “Don’t. Don’t go there. I didn’t take you away from him.”

“I know. I’m sorry. That was stupid.” Ugh, I hated this. Alex wasn’t wrong about things coming between us. I got why he was upset, but it wasn’t like Matt and I were going to run off and live happily ever after as humans while Alex rotted in the underworld. I’d never do that to him, and he had to know that.

Alex ran his fingers through his hair, tugging the ends in his fists. “I’m so damn tired of this. When do I get to have you? Really have you?”

Lexi laughed. “Why am I not surprised Jodi’s a prude?”

I glared at her. “That’s not what he meant, Lexi.” At least I didn’t think it was. I knew that was on his mind. We hadn’t been together like that yet, but he was talking about more than that, and she was cheapening our relationship.

Lexi held her hands up. “Whatever.”

“All right, everyone,” Arianna said. “Alex and Jodi don’t need an audience. Move along.” She ushered them away from us, giving my arm a quick squeeze before she followed.

I moved toward Alex, but he backed away. “Don’t do that.” I advanced on him again. “Don’t push me away. You just said there were too many things coming between us all the time. Don’t you be one of them, too.” He stopped, and I took his hands in mine. “I’m yours, Alex. All of me.”

“No, you’re not. You want to raise your human soul and your human boyfriend. What the hell do you think is going to happen when you’re both alive again? Together?”

I hadn’t thought about it like that. Would my human feelings for Matt come back? “I wasn’t planning to raise Matt so we could be together again. I only wanted to get him out of here. I swear. Alex, if I could raise you and bring you with me, I’d do it in a heartbeat. I want you with me. Leaving you is the only thing stopping me from raising my human soul right now.”

He pulled me closer to him. “I’m not mad at you. You know that, right? It’s just this situation. Ever since Chase came, I’ve felt like I’m not good enough for you.”

“Alex—”

“No, let me finish. You have all this power. You can do things no other Ophi can. And what am I? An average Ophi. Nothing special. I don’t deserve you.”

“That’s not true. I may be the Chosen One, but I chose you.”

“Great, so I’m special by extension?”

“That’s not what I meant. You’re the only guy I’ve ever loved, Ophi or not. Yes, I had strong feelings for Matt. Yes, I still want Matt to be happy. But I don’t love him. I love you. Being with Matt again isn’t going to change that.”

“Being with him? You mean you aren’t just going to raise him? You’re going to keep him with you while you find a way to get us out of here?”

Crap, I was making this worse. “I don’t want to do this alone. Like I said, if I could take you with me, I would.”

“How is Matt going to be of any help to you?” His jaw tightened; he was gritting his teeth. “I hate to say this, but it seems like you just want some extra time with your old boyfriend.”

Was he wrong? Was I trying to get more time with Matt? “I’m not going to lie. I do like the thought of getting a second chance with Matt.”

Alex let go of my hands and turned away from me. His hands clenched into fists, and he swung at the rows of asphodels, sending white flower petals flying everywhere.

“Alex!” I grabbed him, but he kept swinging. “Not like that! That’s not what I meant. Please, if you love me, hear me out.”

He stopped, but his whole body shook with rage. He shrugged my hands off his arm.

“Matt was my friend, too. I didn’t just care about him as my boyfriend. For most of the time I knew him, he was one of my two best friends. I owe him this. I owe myself the chance to make things right and to say goodbye to him for good. I know I can’t keep him in my life. It’s too dangerous. But I think I should at least get to say goodbye to him on my own terms, not because he died, not because I have to run away and fulfill my Ophi destiny. I owe him the truth.” Now I was breathing heavily. I’d blurted all that out, wanting to say everything before Alex got the chance to cut me off.

“You don’t still have feelings for him?” He was staring out over the asphodels, unable to look me in the eyes.

“I do still care about him as a friend, but that’s all. As a friend.” I reached for his arm again, and this time he didn’t pull away. “When this is all over, when we’re out of here and back at the school, I promise it will just be you and me. No one else. For as long as you want me.”

He turned toward me and took my hand. “I’m holding you to that promise.”

I smiled, and a tear ran down my cheek. “So, what now?”

“You don’t have to ask for my permission. You’re the leader, remember?”

“I know, but that doesn’t mean I can’t ask for your input. You are my boyfriend, aren’t you?”

“Through bad and worse, apparently.”

“Come on, don’t say that. Things haven’t been all bad.” I touched his cheek, and even without me transferring any power to him, he smiled.

“No, definitely not.”

I reached up to kiss him, but he stopped me. “We have company, remember?”

I’d kind of forgotten about Matt. “Right. Sorry.”

“No need to apologize to me. It’s actually nice to see that I can make you forget about everything else.”

“You do that to me a lot, you know. I’m sorry if I don’t always make you see that.”

He kissed the top of my head. “I guess we need to find two bodies for you guys. A guy and a girl. Unless…”

“Don’t even think it. I’m not putting Matt into a girl’s body.” I couldn’t help it. I laughed. Poor Alex. He was so desperate not to lose me to Matt he wanted to make Matt a girl. “You are so lucky I love you.”

“I know.” He smiled, but his tone was completely serious. I leaned forward and kissed him. I knew Matt was watching us, but I didn’t care.

“Okay, so how do we find out where the new souls are? I need to find them almost immediately when they arrive.”

“I think we need to talk to Tony. He’s our expert.” Alex took my hand and started toward Tony and the others, but I held him back.

“Hang on.” I turned to Matt. “Matt, will you come with us, please?” He stared at me, not understanding.

“Take his hand,” Alex said. “He might remember your touch. I would if I were him.” Moments like these made me wonder how I’d gotten so lucky. Alex really was amazing. I was staring at him, and I guess he thought I was wondering if it was a trick because he said, “I’ve seen you hold the guy’s hand before. I think I can handle it without flipping out.”

“I know. That wasn’t it. I was just in awe of you. You’re kind of perfect, you know that?” Perfect. It was the word I’d always used for Matt, but it really did apply to Alex, too.

He smiled, and I swear his cheeks got a little red. Still holding Alex’s hand, I reached for Matt. He didn’t move, so I carefully slipped my hand in his. “Is this okay? Do you mind if I take you to my friends?”

Still nothing, but his fingers curved slightly around mine. That was all the answer I needed. I nodded to Alex, and we walked over to the others. I’m sure we looked like a demented threesome, every bit as awkward as it felt.

The others raised their eyes to us. They obviously had no idea what I was doing. I wasn’t really sure I knew either.

I let go of Matt’s hand. “Okay, so here’s the plan. We need two new souls. I’m bringing Matt with me.”

Arianna looked back and forth between Alex and me. I knew she was checking to see how he really felt about me bringing Matt along.

“Alex and I discussed it, and Matt doesn’t deserve this kind of afterlife. Hades is only keeping him here to punish me. I have to free him, give him another shot at life.”

I couldn’t help feeling like they were ignoring me. All eyes were on Alex. I nudged him, encouraging him to say something and make the blank stares go away.

He let them squirm for another moment before he chimed in. “Matt will be human again, and he’ll help Jodi. I don’t want her to go through this alone. She won’t have anyone who knows who she really is since she’ll be in a different body.”

Lexi raised an eyebrow. “You’re sending your girlfriend to shack up with her ex-boyfriend, and they’ll both be human? Wow, Alex, I didn’t peg you for a complete idiot.”

“Enough, Lexi.” Arianna gave her daughter a long hard look.

“What? I’m trying to help.” She shrugged, and in her own strange way, I think she really was looking out for Alex.

“I trust Jodi.” Alex gave me a small smile.

“And we won’t be shacking up,” I said. “Matt doesn’t have to stay with me at all if he doesn’t want to. I’ll help him get settled, but he’s free to live his life however he wants.”

“Wait,” Leticia said. “You’re going to worry about getting him settled before you figure out how to save us? So, like, you two will be getting all cozy in your new lives while we’re here being tortured.”

“Jodi’s body and half her soul will still be here,” Alex jumped to my defense. “She’ll be suffering right along with us, and it will actually be harder on her because she’ll be able to feel both parts of her soul. It’s going to be hard for her not to lose it, having to deal with that.” He looked around the group, his eyes falling on each Ophi. “So, if anyone wants to question what Jodi’s actually going to have to endure while trying to free us, you can take it up with me.”

Lexi crossed her arms. “Seriously, I don’t know if you are the most romantic guy ever or if you’re a total dumbass.” I was about to flip on her, but she added, “Either way, Jodi’s lucky to have you.”

Lexi had definitely changed since we’d come here. Maybe it was seeing her sister again, seeing what Abby had become, but part of me was almost starting to like Lexi. Almost.

“How do we even go about doing this?” Carol asked. “No offense, but I’d really like to get home to Mason. I’m not crazy about having to wait around in Hell while Jodi figures things out.”

“I know.” I understood how she felt. She missed her husband, and I’m sure seeing Alex stand up for me reminded her of Mason. He’d had no idea that letting Carol come to the school was going to mean losing her to Hades. If I had anything to say about it, they’d be together again soon. “Guys, I know this sucks. I know it’s my fault we’re all here.” Alex opened his mouth to protest, but I shook my head. “I’m the leader. Whatever happens is on my head. I take responsibility. It comes with the job description. But I promise you I will get us out of here. All of us.” My eyes fell on Carol. “Once we’re home, you can go back to Serpentarius and pretend you never met me.”

“I don’t want to pretend I never met you, Jodi. I just want to be with my family again.”

I nodded. “Then let’s find some bodies for Matt and me and make that happen as soon as possible.”

I looked around the group. Everyone was in agreement. We had to get moving. Scope out new souls. The only problem was that no one knew how to get out of the Fields of Asphodel. Hades had dropped us in the middle of this flower-filled field.

“Any chance Matt knows the way out?” Alex asked. “That weird pattern he was walking, do you think it has anything to do with getting back to the Elysian Fields?”

I pictured Matt walking in his circular route. It had seemed like he was wandering in an unending loop, but what if it was more than that? “We don’t really have any other ideas, so let’s try it.”

I let go of Alex’s hand and stood in front of Matt. He had a tendency to get very dazed if he wasn’t focused on something specific. I made sure I blocked his view of everything else. “Matt? Do you want to go for a walk? Find that place you were looking for earlier?”

Instead of answering, he turned and wandered away. We all followed, making sure to stay far enough away so he wouldn’t bump into us if he changed directions.

“Hey.” Alex reached for my elbow. “What if he finds the Elysian Fields? Will you still take him back with you? Raise his soul?”

Let him stay in his own personal Heaven or give him a second chance at life in a different body? It was a tough decision. “I’ll let him decide.” He deserved to make that choice for himself.

Alex let go of my arm and continued walking alongside me. I couldn’t tell if he was upset or just processing everything. As we walked, I kept an eye out for Hades. It seemed like a lot of time had passed since we got here. I hoped Hades wouldn’t show up before we were able to follow Matt to wherever it was he was going.

“This is crazy,” Lexi said, as Matt curved to the right. “He’s not going anywhere. I mean, how can he even know where he’s heading? This place looks the same no matter where you are.”

“Faith, Lexi,” Arianna said. “Sometimes you just have to have faith.”

“Faith in a mindless soul? Great.”

I couldn’t even argue with her.