Текст книги "Two Worlds Colliding"

Автор книги: Jani Kay

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Текущая страница: 11 (всего у книги 12 страниц)

Chapter 31 ~ Ryder

Beaming from fucking ear to ear, I couldn’t take my eyes—or hands—off Jade as we traveled up in the elevator, but I knew I had a lot of explaining to do, and that she wasn’t going to let me off lightly. After what I’d put her through, and the agony of still not knowing if she would take me back, I needed answers. I was going to have to bring my A-game tonight.

Jade had agreed to accompany me to the guest room, but that was no guarantee that I was home-free. No, I got the impression that she was that eager to get out of the claustrophobically small security room with the strange view, and that she would have agreed to anything if it meant her freedom.

That’s exactly why I was holding on to her arm with a steel-like grip as I steered her toward room 314. She’d bolted before; I wouldn’t be surprised if she tried it again. And fuck, I was getting tired of the cat-and-mouse game. I just wanted for us to be together. For-fucking-ever, and be done. The mechanics of how and where were less important than the reason why.

As I swiped the card, she stood at the door, rigid and unsmiling.

“This is a mistake. Thank you for saving me from an asshole again; it seems you are always there just when I need you most. But I must leave now. I just can't do this.”

“Princess,” I breathed, my heart sinking all the way to my heavy boots.

“Please don’t stop me. It’s best this way.” She stood on her toes and planted a soft kiss on my cheek. Then she turned and walked away. The elevator doors were still open, so she walked straight in and pushed the button. Her words had frozen me to the spot.

Please don’t stop me. It’s best this way.

How could I disrespect her wish? Fuck. What the hell was I supposed to do? Watch her walk away?

Before I could move or say anything the doors closed. The sadness in her eyes was the last thing I saw. Fuck. Did that mean she didn't love me anymore?

Yes, our worlds were completely different.

Yes, they had collided—badly.

Yes, we were up against the worst kind of odds—our very own families—who were tearing us apart. Not to mention my own special brand of stupidity.

Fuck that shit.

It was time for Ryder Knox to fight for what he truly wanted. To fight for love, and happiness. To the very fucking end.

If Jade didn't love me anymore, I wanted to hear her say those words directly to me. I was done with the fear of losing her driving me to deny myself what my heart desired most. Why the hell did humans do that to themselves? Christ, I was my own worst fucking enemy.

It took me another ten seconds to mobilize myself. I flew down the stairs, two at a time. I had to stop her. I had to fight for her.

She was my woman, and she was worth fighting for.

Hell yeah.

I reached the bottom of the stairs and darted toward the elevator. Empty. Fuck.

Frantic, I ran around the lobby, trying to find where she’d gone. There was no time to waste. I needed to stop her, to tell her how much I loved her, even if she didn't love me, so that she could know she owned my heart . . . and my soul.

What she did with that knowledge would be up to her.

Out on the sidewalk, there was nothing but the normal city buzz. My throat tightened when I noticed the cab further down pulling away from the curb. There was nothing I could do. By the time I got to my bike, she’d be far away. I didn't even know where she’d go to. Mia had mentioned in passing that she’d moved out of her parent’s home.

I stood there, my heart shredded. Yeah, typical. Just when I’d thought things were looking up, they turned to shit. Why did it always fucking happen to me? I ran my fingers through my hair, suddenly tired as fuck. I was wiped out from the long journey I’d just returned from days ago. Wiped out from lack of sleep and worry. Wiped out that I'd lost the one thing that mattered to me most in life.

I’d lost everything, because Jade was all that I ever wanted. She made me whole.

Chapter 32 ~ Ryder

I had finally come to the darkest night in my life. Everything had collided and combusted; only embers were left burning.

Deflated, and tired to the bone, I remembered that in my mad dash to get to Jade, I'd left the guest room door wide open. Depleted, I shook my head and decided to get back up there and sleep off my fatigue, so that I’d be ready to make new plans in the morning. I knew that everything that seemed insurmountable in the darkness of the night somehow wouldn't appear as big an obstacle in the daylight.

Too shattered to care about anything, I rode the elevator back up to the third floor. It’d be too hard to even find my way back to the compound, so I was staying the night. I closed the door. The room was dark, but I couldn’t be bothered to find the light switch.

I pulled my boots off my feet at the entrance and threw them into the corner, and went in search of the bed. I needed to sleep. An exhaustion had come over me, like I'd never felt before. I simply couldn’t care about anything now that Jade had walked out of my life.

“Ryder?” Her voice floated softly across the quiet darkness.

Fuck. Now I was hallucinating. And I hadn’t touched a drop of booze or any substance, which meant that I was in a worse shape than I’d imagined. My eyes slowly adjusting to the darkness, I stumbled against what I presumed was the bed. I needed to lie down and close my fucking eyes.

I fell onto the bed, face first, arms stretched out.

“Ryder!” Her voice was louder; it sounded so fucking real I could scream. Princess was tormenting me, fucking with my mind. At this rate it would be impossible to fall asleep if I kept hearing her voice.

A soft hand on my shoulder made me jump. Fuck!

Never having believed in ghosts, I grabbed blindly in the direction of the voice, only to hear her laugh softly. I was definitely losing my mind. Jesus fucking Christ.

“You’re crazy,” the sweet voice whispered. Fuck, I couldn’t agree more. I was positively certifiable.

Her soft curves pressed into my hard body. I could even smell her. If this was indeed a dream, I didn't want to wake up. Ever.

“Go to sleep, baby, you’re so tired. Just go to sleep,” she whispered as she stroked my hair. Somewhere between consciousness and sleep, I knew this was real.

So this is what an out-of-body experience feels like.

She was here. I didn't know why or how. She was holding me, caressing me.

Loving me.

I was home.

* * *

I woke in the middle of the night with my body curled around Jade’s softness. At first I thought it was all part of the dream I’d had earlier. I stroked her hair, and kissed her neck. She moaned softly in her sleep.

She was fucking real.

We were both fully clothed, but it was good to just hold her. I had no idea that I could feel so much at peace by just having my woman in my arms.

Now that I’d had some sleep, I was feeling better. My eyes had adjusted to the darkness, and I could see Jade’s beautiful face in the light of the moon, her long lashes sweeping across her cheeks and her lips curved into a semi-smile even as she slept.

She stirred against me, opening her eyes, she looked straight at me. We stared in wonder at one another. Yes, we needed to talk, but right now, words were not needed. Even though we both understood just how difficult our lives could become if we chose to do this, we had to decide if it was what we really wanted—and then just go for it. Together. There was no other way.

Without a doubt, I was in. One hundred percent.

Chapter 33 ~ Jade

Ryder was staring at me in a way he’d never looked at me before. Usually his eyes were filled with lust, but now there was something different there. He let me look deep into his soul. Up until tonight he’d been pretty guarded, and he’d always kept his eyes hooded, to prevent anyone from seeing in. It was a protection mechanism that I’d seen Harrison use too, so I was very aware of it. It was simply their way of hiding their pain to the rest of the world.

Letting me see into his soul was a big deal for Ryder. He was so used to acting tough and ruthless all the time, never wanting to show weakness in case it was used against him, that it must have become a hard habit to break.

Maybe it was because he felt safe and loved that he was now willing to open up to me. It made me love him even more, knowing how hard it was for him to do.

“Hi,” I whispered into the dark. We were the only two people here, yet it felt wrong to speak loudly. It would break the magic of the moment.

“You came back. You didn't run.” Ryder’s voice was filled with wonder. Reverence even.

I nodded, a big lump in my throat. He kissed my forehead, softly, gently.

“Why, Princess? Why did you come back?”

“Because . . . because even though I know our worlds are so different . . . and it will be hard on us both . . . not to mention our families . . . I want us.” Ryder was a straightforward man, so I gave it to him straight.

He sighed. “Yeah, I know. But it will be worth it, don’t you think?”

I thought about his words before answering. It was flattering that he thought so. My heart swelled, and filled with so much love for this man that it was close to bursting.

“Yes, I guess so,” I replied carefully.

“Fuck, Princess. Here I’m ready to bust my balls and do battle for you, and all you can say is ‘I guess so’?”

I couldn’t help myself—a small giggle escaped my lips. My Ryder was back. The man who spoke his mind, and said what he thought in no uncertain terms.

God, I loved him.

“You’ll fight for me?” I asked, needing to reassure myself that I’d understood his intentions correctly.

“Fuck yeah . . . to the death, Princess. Because life without you ain't worth a damn.”

“Really?” I breathed.

A smile twitched at the corners of his lips. “Yeah, really. I want to be with you till the last breath leaves my body.”

Those words from this man’s lips were so beautiful—exactly what I needed to hear.

Small circles rubbed up and down my back, making me go limp in Ryder's arms, but he had to clarify many things before I was satisfied. Especially after what he’d said before he left.

“Why the change of heart now, Ryder? What changed?”

He grinned sheepishly. “Woman, you are fucking exasperating. Cross-examining the witness till you have your answers.”

“I need to know, Ryder, otherwise I’ll always wonder. So if you tell me straight up, that eliminates a lot of second guessing.”

“Christ. I’ve often thought that you’d be the best lawyer in the state. But I was wrong.”

“What?” I asked, shocked at his words.

He chuckled. “Because you’re gonna be the best fucking attorney in the country.”

I laughed. “Pressure much? But that may just mean I’d have to prosecute your biker ass.”

“Not if I’m your husband. I won't allow it.”

I sucked in a breath. What did he mean?

“Yeah, don’t look so surprised. Cause I ain't ever letting you go after tonight. Deal with it.” His eyes were serious, not a trace of mockery to be seen.

“’The Princess and the Badass Biker’. I can just see that headline in the papers.” I joked, keeping it light. I didn't want Ryder to run scared if I used the L word again—certainly not like the way he bolted the last time I’d told him I loved him.

“You gave up on us, Princess. That hurt,” he said, taking me completely by surprise. Wasn’t he the one who walked away? He left the city and rode his bike more than a thousand miles to get away from me. Talk about hurting.

“Why do you say that?”

“Going off with Cowboy. You were going to let him fuck you if I didn't get there in time to stop it. Fuck, I'm going to spank that ass for putting me through such agony.”

My core clenched at the thought. A spanking from Ryder was erotic, and even though it hurt, he made good afterwards. I’d even risk his ire from time to time just to get a good spanking. Somehow it made the sex afterward even better, running the thin line between pain and pleasure.

“You were the one who didn't want me. You said so yourself.”

“Baby. I’ve wanted you from the first moment I laid fucking eyes on you. The bossy bitch who looked down her pretty little nose at me was sexy beyond belief. You had me from day one, my Princess.”

“I did? You could have fooled me.”

“My cock knew even then—though my heart didn't at the time.”

“Your heart?” I placed my fingertips over his heart. It was beating faster than normal. So was mine. It was beating so hard I was surprised I hadn’t broken a few ribs in the process.

“My heart’s a bit rusty, baby. It didn't know how much I loved you until I thought you’d moved on.”

“You love me?” I whispered.

“Quit the question time. You heard me.” The mischievous glint in his eyes was making my toes curl. How hard was it for him to say the three words again? I’d have to use all my lawyer skills to draw it out of him. Ahhh, men.

“I'm not sure what exactly I heard. I may have misunderstood. Just want to make sure we are on the same page here.” I coaxed.

“As long as it’s my page, I can live with it.” He smirked.

“Cocky, arrogant, demanding . . . hmmm . . . Let me count the ways I love thee . . .”

He laughed, a goodhearted laugh from deep within his belly. Planting a kiss on my forehead, he sighed. “Shakespeare had nothing on us. But since I’m not a dumbass biker, and you’re quoting him . . . let me tell you something.” He paused for dramatic effect, smiling at me in such a way it had my insides a-flutter. He stared directly into my eyes. “You’re my fucking Juliet. I’ll die for you, baby.”

It wasn’t exactly how I'd ever imagined having a classic quoted to me, but from Ryder’s mouth it was perfect—the most romantic thing a man had ever said to me.

Just fucking perfect.

Chapter 34 ~ Ryder

I'd never said those three words Jade needed to hear to a woman; and fuck me, they just wouldn’t come to my lips. My heart exploded with love, with joy and happiness. Yet saying those simple three words was torture. It was the biggest fucking deal in my whole life.

Finally, I did have a name for the way I felt about Jade. Love. It was that simple, and that complex. It completely consumed me. Overwhelmed me. Brought me to my fucking knees.

There was a better way to let her know just how much I loved her. Instead of telling her, I wanted to show her. Yeah.

Cupping her face with my hand, I dipped my head and kissed her—gently, slowly, deeply—putting every ounce of my love into that one single kiss. She softened against me, kissing me back with everything she had. Yeah, we were on the same page, alright.

It’d been so long since I'd felt her skin against mine that I was yearning to make love to her. Yeah, not just fuck her, but really make love. There was a difference; before I’d only ever fucked, but tonight I wanted to show her my love.

I kissed along her jaw, nibbling and tasting her skin till I got to her ear. I sucked a lobe into my mouth, and tugged gently. Although I was burning to get inside her, I was going to take this really slow, enjoying and worshiping everything that was Jade. She moaned softly, and I knew that the skin beneath her ear was super sensitive, so I kissed and licked that area too.

Pushing her dress down her shoulders, I growled as I took in the missing buttons on the top. Damn cowboy. How fucking dare he?

I rid her of her dress and sucked in a breath when I saw her lying there in her underwear only. God, she was so beautiful, her soft skin begging for my touch. And I would touch her—worship every inch of her skin—all night long.

Scooting off the bed, I sauntered into the bathroom. Yeah, just as I’d thought: a bath the size of a mini swimming-pool, with jets and sprays, dominated the spacious room. I ran the bath while lighting all of the fifty candles surrounding the bath. My princess deserved the best. I was going to make sure she got it.

Peering into the refrigerator, I grinned. Cowboy had stocked up on enough champagne to fill the fucking bath. Luckily we’d prefer to drink it, so I grabbed two iced flutes and the ice bucket and took it to the bathroom, filling the glasses to the brim. I slipped out of my clothing and went to get my girl.

“Hello, Big Boy.” She laughed softly as she took in my cock, hard and ready for her. She lifted her hips as I pulled down her panties, and then reached back to unclip her bra, slipping it off her arms and baring her breasts to me. I stared with a salacious grin. My cock jerked in appreciation, making her laugh.

She twisted her long blond hair and knotted it on top of her head. She looked sexy as fuck with tendrils floating around her face—so feminine and beautiful it made my heart ache with love.

I lifted her off the bed and carried her to the bathroom. Her lips were dewy in the soft candlelight, inviting me to suck on them. She pressed her tits into my chest, her hard nipples grazing my skin as she did so. I set her down in the bath and followed eagerly. Sitting behind her, I pulled her to my chest as I fondled both breasts, kissing her neck. Ahh, heaven.

“A toast,” she said as she handed me a glass. Fuck, my boys would laugh their heads off if they could see me now, in a fancy king-sized bath, candles fucking everywhere, drinking none other than girly bubbly liquid and enjoying every fucking moment. I was beginning to understand why Max took so much pleasure in the high life, and was trying to lure me to join him. It was addictive.

Or was it because of Jade that it was so pleasurable?

Jade turned in the bath to face me. We clinked our glasses, both smiling as we gazed into one another’s eyes.

“To happiness,” I said, meaning every word. She echoed my words, smiling.

Watching Jade take a sip, my heart squeezed in my chest at how adorable she was when she wrinkled her nose as the bubbles tickled her nostrils. Fuck. I'd never get enough of just looking at her. My cock was dying to get inside her, but it wasn’t time yet.

“So,” she drawled, raising a perfect eyebrow at me. “How are we going to handle this? Because I’ve racked my brain, and haven’t found a solution yet on how to convince Harrison that you’re OK for me to be with. And Cobra; how will he take it if you hook up with me?”

I shrugged. “I honestly don’t fucking know, baby. But all that matters is that we are together, yeah? I don’t want to go another day without you. I’ll talk to Cobra about making you my old lady.”

The way her eyes widened and she nearly choked on her champagne, would’ve had me laughing if it wasn’t such a serious matter. For more than a thousand miles on my bike, I’d thought of nothing else other than how we’d handle this. I’d mulled over every idea that came up around and around in my head. I might be able to convince Cobra; I'd known him for the best part of my life. He was my brother, for fuck’s sake. Surely he wanted me to be happy, didn't he? He’d always told me how the love of a woman was the best thing any man could experience. Would he really deny me that? Even if the woman was Jade? Fuck, I’d have my work cut out, Cobra was determined to put the club first. I'd have to play on our brotherhood and hope it didn't backfire on me.

As for the angry, aggressive fucking cop? I had no fucking idea how to handle him. Yet I couldn’t let him be the reason Jade and I split apart. Not now, not after all the fucking shit we’d been through. There simply had to be a way around this. I’d keep on looking for a solution, no matter how hard it was, or how long it took. Because I wanted a life with Jade. No holds barred. Without restrictions or rules.

“W . . . what?” she stammered. “Y . . . your o . . . old lady?”

“You heard me, Princess. I want your sexy ass on the back of my bike. I want to marry you. Have a shitload of babies with you.” I cocked an eyebrow at her. “You have a problem with that?”

She shook her head, biting her bottom lip as she peered at me from under her lashes. I lifted her face to mine and saw that her chin was quivering, tears rimming her big blue eyes. Fuck, I wanted to make her happy, not make her cry.

“Baby,” I breathed, upset that she was sad “what’s wrong?” My heart was squeezing so much it felt like it would collapse in my chest. Was what I’d said so wrong that I made her cry? Fuck.

She shook her head. “No. No problem,” she said, smiling through her tears. What the fuck did that mean? I’d never seen a woman behave like this. It was messing with my head.

“So why the tears, baby?” I rubbed my thumb over her trembling lips.

“Because you’ve just made me the happiest woman in the world.” She blinked through the tears, her smile nearly arresting my heart.

“You’re happy?” I was fucking gob smacked. Women.

“Uh-huh,” she nodded, “never been happier.”

I kissed the tears on her cheeks, sucking them up.

“Oh yeah?” I grinned, fucking overjoyed by her response. We were finally getting somewhere.

She refilled our glasses, and I watched as she sipped her champagne. One glass was enough for me; I’d rather have a beer or scotch. Old habits die hard. But I could see that she was enjoying it, and that was enough for me. Instead, I took hold of her foot and massaged the soles, first the one, then the other. It seemed to work like magic, because she moaned softly, and her eyes went all soft and dewy.

“Listen, I think I know how to handle this. I know you have an apartment because Mia told me. No doubt Harrison will be on the lookout, so I won't be able to come there.” I watched her face to see if she was following my train of thought. “I have access to this place in Malibu. It belongs to Max’s company, and he asked me to move in years ago, but I had no need for a place then. Now I do. I’ll speak to Max, and find out if his offer still stands.”

“Assuming it does, what then?” she asked softly.

“If it does, I’ll arrange to move in. Then you can come there in the evenings after work and over weekends.” The way she bit into her lip meant she wasn’t sure this would work. It was risky, but fuck, I needed to see her every day.

“Ryder, I'm not sure it’s practical. What if Harrison follows me? And Cobra will be mad too because you’ll put yourself at risk.”

Shit. My girl was smart. Still I needed to convince her, otherwise I was fucked. “It will be tricky, I know, but we’ll have to take our chances until we can work out how to handle our families. For now, it’s the best solution. At least we can be together, and the place Max has ain't too shabby; you’ll like it. Even has its own beach access, which makes it really private. Max installed extra security, so it’s the best place for us to be together right now.”

“It sounds so cloak and dagger. So dangerous. Why can't this just be simple?” She sounded exasperated. I understood exactly how she was feeling.

“Because nothing worth having ever comes cheaply. Or without fighting for. And make no mistake—I’m going to fight for this. I’m a tenacious bastard.” I chuckled.

Princess had no idea what lengths I’d go to for her.