Текст книги "Grace Street"

Автор книги: Ella Dominguez

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Текущая страница: 13 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

Elsa swallowed hard. Leave it to Mr. Black to point out the finer points of his unreasonable stipulations. “You truly are the wickedest man I’ve ever met,” she pouted.

“You’ve just figured that out?” he smirked.

“But what about my mom?” she asked. “I mean, I can’t say no to her, Victor. She’s my mom. I miss her.”

His lightheartedness vanished and he twirled a lock of her hair between his fingers. “I wouldn’t really expect you to say no to her.”

She sighed and kissed him in appreciation of his kindness. She rested her chin on his chest as she looked up at the scar on his chin, wondering if it was caused by his mother. What a distressing thought. Seeing him stare up at the ceiling, she was reminded of the look on his face as he was binding her. He had seemed so tormented. She wanted to try and get to the bottom of it as gently as she could.

As she scanned his face for something, anything, the softness in his eyes was replaced with insolence and his expression grew serious.

“You’re doing it again – trying to figure me out. Stop.”

Despite the harshness in his voice, she wasn’t giving up that easily. “Don’t underestimate me. I know more than I say, think more than I speak, and notice more than you realize. I know there’s a good man beneath Mr. Black.”

Sitting up brusquely and pushing her off his chest, he gripped her chin. “Do you know why I call myself Mr. Black?”

Elsa blinked rapidly, took a deep breath and held it. This was it. She was breaking through.

His brows drew together in an agonized expression. “Because deep down, that’s what my heart and soul is – blackened and charred, burnt and unrecognizable,” he gritted his teeth. “There is no light in me, Elsa, so don’t.”

She shook her head, not getting his meaning. “Don’t what?”

“Fall for me,” he pleaded with his eyes.

She moistened her lips nervously and felt the misery of his statement. “What if I told you it’s too late?”

Victor pushed himself off the bed violently and stepped back just out of her reach, and an inexplicable look of withdrawal came over his face. “Then I would tell you that I feel sorry for you because this isn’t going to end well.”

She stood as well and took one step forward to reach a hand out, desperate for his touch, but he pushed it away.

“This is just a game, remember? I’m only here to…”

She cut in, ready to finish his ludicrous statement. “I remember. You’re here to ‘help’ me. But here’s a news flash, Victor: it seems to me that I’m not the one who needs the help here.”

He shot her a cold look and crossed his arms over his chest. “I don’t need help.”

“Neither do I,” she countered. “So I guess we’re at an impasse.”

He nodded in discontented agreement, “I suppose so.”

Her eyes dropped to hide her disappointment in how the evening was turning out. “Am I free to leave?” she whispered.

She felt Victor’s finger on her chin, lifting her face. “Is that what you want?”

“You know what I want,” she replied even softer than before.

He sighed and shook his head.

“Fine. I’ll go,” she choked out as she turned and sulked away. She made it to the door when Victor wrapped his fingers around her wrist and yanked her back.

“Like hell you will.”

He pulled her into his embrace and smothered her with his kiss, stifling any objections she might have had. Not that she had any. She didn’t really want to leave. She wanted to hold him and to be held by him. He swept her up into his arms and marched the short distance to the bed and laid her down gently. Yes, this was the man she had missed during his absence: her sweet and temperamental Victor.

*

Elsa woke to the sound of Victor’s deep and peaceful breathing. After his admission and desperate kiss, they had simply laid in bed next to each other until they fell asleep. She kissed the corner of his mouth and walked down the stairs to the living room. Still naked, she turned on the fireplace and squatted in front of it for warmth.

The evening had been so perfect. He hadn’t even mentioned their abrupt departure on Sunday or the cruel words they both had said to one another. His writings were beckoning her and as much as she wanted to be near him, she couldn’t wait to get back to continue reading so she could learn more about him.

Staring at the crackling fire, she became lost in her thoughts. Burnt and unrecognizable… Unrecognizable from what? From whom he once was? Then that would mean he wasn’t always like this.

A warm blanket and strong arms suddenly encompassed her and held her close.

“You’re freezing. What are you doing out here?” Victor’s voice seemed distant.

“Thinking,” she curled into him.

His arms squeezed tighter yet. Managing no more than a hoarse whisper, he breathed into her ear, “I wish I was inside your head to hear your thoughts. You would never have to speak you desires, I could just sit close like this and feel every one of your dreams and wishes and fulfill them one by one.”

His deep voice simmered with barely checked passion and his words stoked the already out-of-control fire he had ignited within her. Her heart clenched and she looked up into his eyes. They were focused on the flames and reflecting the red embers in the darkened room.

“Why do you say things like that to me?”

He blinked rapidly and met her gaze.

“Is this part of your game, Mr. Black?” she implored.

He pushed the hair from her eyes and kissed her forehead tenderly. “No, my words are real and this is the real me.”

Without saying anything, she mentally begged him to kiss her, but he only sat staring down at her, visibly struggling internally with his emotions. Gently, he pushed her away.

“You’re free to leave.”

Why couldn’t he just accept what she was offering? She sat on her knees for a long moment not even knowing herself what she was trying to offer him before rising to leave. She climbed the stairs to the bedroom slowly and gathered her bag, a sinking feeling starting to overwhelm her with each of her steps. She descended the stairs to see Victor waiting by the open door with the blanket wrapped around his body. She wasn’t even sure how she was getting home until she saw a cab parked on the street waiting for her. On the verge of breaking down, she was unable to look him in the eyes. She gulped loudly and stepped forward when she felt a tear roll down her cheek.

He reached out and brushed it away with his thumb. “No tears tonight, Elsa.”

She looked at him bewildered. “I thought you liked my tears?”

“I do, but not tonight.”

17: Light vs. Dark

Standing just inside the open door, Victor watched as the cab drove away. Guilt was ever present and he tried to brush it off like he had done countless times, but he couldn’t. Not this time. Not as easily. He hadn’t been so conflicted over a woman in years. Where the hell was it coming from? He suspected it had everything to do with the intense scrutiny he was feeling regarding the Cambridge case and his workload, and nothing to actually do with the female in question. At least he hoped that was the case. There was no way in hell he would allow himself to get attached to a Chapter. Love or anything remotely like it didn’t fit onto his agenda. He shook his head and sighed. Elsa. He needed to stop thinking of her as only a number. But why?

The dream… the vivid and macabre images were still lingering in his memory and he never wanted to be that man; not in real life; not even in a dream. The work he was doing with his Chapters was keeping him from being that person. They helped to keep his mind off the inevitable truth of his ancestry and distract him from the darkness that threatened to overtake him.

Even though the blood of the brutal man he called his father was coursing through his veins as was his cruel mother’s, he tried to convince himself that he was still his own man. He was doing something constructive with his character flaws and using them for something good by helping people who couldn’t help themselves. Wasn’t he? He clenched his jaw. Who the fuck did he think he was kidding? Himself, that’s who. It was better that he lied to himself than to allow the ugly truth of what he had done to all those Chapters seep into his thoughts.

God damn Chapter One.

Seating himself at the table, he reached for his journal. He couldn’t help but wonder what kind of man he might have turned out to be if One had never come into his life. Would he be kinder? Less cruel? A loving man with a family of his own? Or would he be just some wishy-washy, half-rate FBI agent barely pulling his own weight? Or worse yet, some pussy-whipped asshole in an unhappy relationship with a woman who would never allow him to explore his dark side? He would never know and he didn’t want to. These were the cards life dealt him and was going to play them for all their worth.

Your persistence with trying to figure me out, C8, is getting infuriating and will only get you into trouble. My thoughts have now taken a turn toward the malevolent side and my dreams of recent are distressing. You’re pushing me and I’m near my breaking point. My sanity is already questionable and I fear what might happen if you drive me too far to the edge. I don’t want to hurt you, either physically or emotionally, though it’s inevitable at this point for your heart and spirit to be broken once I’m done with you. Though I do admit to wanting to break you, it’s your willpower that I want to defeat, not your heart and sure as hell not your spirit.

Will my cruelty and distance obliterate your inner light like mine was snuffed out? I hope not…that’s never been my intention. Or has it? I can no longer tell the difference between what I want and what I need.

My brain is cluster fuck right now and you, in no small way, have contributed to that. C1 started all this fucked-up mess and now

Frustrated with himself for thinking about the one person he thought he had put behind him, he left the last sentence unfinished and furiously crossed a line through it. Turning to a section designated as his own chapter, he continued.

Will I age with grace? Am I going to leave my mark on this world? My life is ticking by and I’m beginning to feel as though nothing has been accomplished – all my time wasted on Chapters, people, who can’t see what I’m trying to do for them or don’t want the kind of help I’m offering. Am I really helping them? To admit that I’m doing anything else would force me to accept a reality I’m not ready to face. Not yet. Not until my work is done. When will that day come…? I wish someone could tell me.

He slammed his journal closed, threw it across the room and sunk low into the chair. He leaned forward and fisted his hair, his body and mind near the breaking point. He needed to get the Cambridge Killer. And, God, how he needed to break Elsa. He had to make her understand that there was no future with him and that the light that she was so convinced was in everyone had flickered out long ago, and there was no rekindling it.

***

The drive back to Elsa’s apartment was agonizing. She held her tears rigidly until she stepped foot into her home. Even then, she only allowed herself a brief moment of grief. She was tired of the tears. She hated them. She dropped her bag on the floor and stared at the dark, empty room. There was nothing and no one for her there. Not Victor. Not Mr. Black. She turned and walked out without a second thought. Mr. Black’s manuscript was whispering to her from across town, demanding to be read and dissected. The real Victor was in there somewhere, on those pages, waiting to be exposed.

She caught a bus to her office building and when she entered, security looked her over curiously. She made up some lame excuse as to why she was there on a Friday night when she should be out living her life; what little of one she had.

The late spring night was beautiful and the weather outside was almost perfect making her wish she was out enjoying it instead of obsessing over a man she knew was broken and completely wrong for her. She sighed miserably. Poor Victor, he was wrong for everyone, even himself. Opening a window, a cool, damp breeze blew in and whipped her hair around. Victor’s faint scent filled the room. She smelled of him.

Turning to the page she had left off with, she decided it best to not read anymore about Peyton, the masochist. Her heart and stomach couldn’t take it. Anyway, what was to be gleaned from reading all the gory details of that unspeakable encounter? Would she learn anything new about him? Maybe… but not the kind of things she wanted to really know and nothing good would be achieved by reading what Mr. Black was capable of putting another human being through.

It was Victor that she wanted to learn about. She would just have to save the rest of that chapter for another day; a day when she could see past the darkness he said he couldn’t deny; a day when she knew for sure that there was still light within him.

She flipped through the pages until she came to a new Chapter.

Chapter 4 – Jordan, age 40. Profession: Project Manager

Prologue: We were introduced at a city fundraiser by none other than the Mayor of our lovely city. It was hard to deny the attraction felt between the two of us. I can only guess it was just as much a surprise to you as it was to me. I felt your eyes on me the entire evening. It’s a strange thing when one realizes they are attracted to the same sex, most especially when it has never happened to this degree before.

Elsa’s eyes froze on the words same sex. She glanced at the name and profession again. Victor was bisexual? She never would have guessed. Never. She prided herself on her ability to pick up on that sort of thing and not once did she ever get the impression that he was bisexual. Maybe he’s not. Perhaps he’s gay and in denial? She huffed under her breath. Victor Laurenzo, aka Mr. Black, was not homosexual. The way he fucked and knew his way around a pussy… there was no way in hell he was gay.

If I weren’t so interested in finding out how your lean physique would feel under my control, I might have felt sorry for your gorgeous wife and children that you were wearing on your arm like a badge of heterosexuality and as some sort of confirmation of your thinly-veiled masculinity. I’m often times amazed at how easy it is for me to see through strangers’ façades when the ones they love can’t even see the real people hiding beneath their masks. It’s a God-given talent, I suppose, and it has served me well in my profession.

Elsa frowned. Not at the thought of Victor being attracted to man but because Jordan was married with children. It was natural for men to be attracted to each other on some primal level, no matter how much they may deny that little fact, just like it was inherent for women to be attracted to one another, at least in her opinion and experience. It was ironic that he was writing about people wearing masks when he was wearing one himself. He may be a brilliant man, but he really was a man in serious denial.

It was a big step for me to move forward with you, but your utter maleness was hard to resist. I wasn’t sure you would accept my offer and I might end up with not only a black eye, but a bruised ego, however, my initial perception about you was spot-on. I’m even convinced that if I hadn’t come forward and made the first move, you would’ve done it yourself. Being an ex-Marine, you’re known for going after what you want and getting the bad guy. I like that. It’s something we share in common. And I’m very bad, Mr. Faux-Machismo.

I’m more excited about exploring your character and personality than I have been about a Chapter in quite some time. My only hope is that you like to play hard and can take it deep. How far will you let me push you, C4? Your denial of your sexuality will be interesting to dissect and your body will be pleasurable distraction from the real world.

Is that what all these Chapters were to him? A distraction? Is that what she was? She supposed in his line of work, he might need someone to take his mind off of the horrific things he must see, but that’s what hobbies are for. Hobbies like golfing, hiking and mountain climbing; not playing with people’s hearts and mind fucking them. She prayed Jordan fared well in Mr. Black’s game, though on some level she hoped he got what was coming to him for cheating on his wife and family.

Her father had done the same thing and the memories of that time in her life were still as raw now as they were then. He chose another woman over her beautiful, but less than gracious, mother. Her father had made the conscious decision to abandon his family to satiate his own selfish wants. Elsa was only fourteen when it all happened and everything that occurred after that came down to her feelings of wanting to be seen and heard. Her way to deal with her parent’s nasty divorce was to be rebellious and to fight any and all authority every step of the way. Nick had his own way of coping: by over-achieving. That one selfish act on her father’s part changed them both completely and shook her mother’s world so badly, her mom was never the same person again either.

How could Mr. Black allow his sexual attraction threaten an established family? And Jordan… he was now on her shit-list for doing the same thing her father had done. Still… she was too intrigued to stop reading.

Pre-activity:

You’re a difficult man to deal with, but I will hold steadfast until you get a clean bill of health. I will not waiver on that point.

It has now been two weeks and you still have not proven your sexual cleanliness to me. Your casualness and seemingly less-than-affected attitude about making me wait is grating on my nerves. I don’t fucking wait, C4. Not for anyone. I have given you three days to either do so or else I will move on, despite how I much I want to be buried inside your ass.

The deadline was not met and I was already seeking another subject when you came to me with your papers. You will pay for making me wait for you.

Surveillance Notes:

Ever the doting husband and father, aren’t you? It makes me laugh. You kiss your wife with the same mouth that was wrapped around my cock only minutes after proving yourself to me. How many other dicks have you sucked, C4? I digress.

As usual, you’ve proven that people are creatures of habit. Your days are just as mundane as all the rest of my Chapters: eat, sleep, work, shit, repeat. But where’s your sex life? A man of your stamina surely needs release on a daily basis as do I. However, I have yet to see you engage in intercourse with your spouse. If I had a stunning woman like that waiting for me at the end of the day, I sure as hell wouldn’t be jacking off to internet porn. I’d be splitting her sweet pussy open every night until she couldn’t walk. Perhaps your lack of arousal for the female form is the problem. My form, however, had no trouble eliciting stimulation on your part, did it?

Weekend 1:

Your physical exam was volatile and rushed. I’m not sure how many other male lovers you’ve had in the past, but this one will not be topped. What should’ve been a simple assessment turned into not only a battle of wills but a struggle to see who was stronger. I won. But that’s because I’m not afraid to play dirty. Those balls of yours that you think are so big felt good cupped in my hand as I squeezed the insolence out of you. You will learn to obey me, C4, and when I say bend over, you better fucking bend over. I took that tight ass of yours and owned it, and what sweet ecstasy it was. You are my first male lover and our first time together was every bit as good as I had imagined.

Elsa put the document down, conflicted by the arousal she was feeling. She ran her hand up the inside of her thigh and stilled, remembering Mr. Black’s rule. Her eyes darted around and peered out the window she was sitting near. It was absurd how in such a short period of time he already had her trained like Pavlov’s dog to fear his ever-lingering presence. All she needed now was the sound of a bell to make her start panting and salivating while she waited for his touch.

Suddenly her phone chirped with a text message from Mr. Black and she rolled her eyes. There was his damned bell.

Mr.Black: Why are you at work?

She really couldn’t get away with anything with this guy.

ElsaC: There was nothing for me at home.

Mr.Black: What’s at work for you this late at night?

She mentally kicked herself for not thinking before responding.

ElsaC: Things to keep my idle hands busy.

Not three minutes later there was a loud bang on her locked office door. Elsa quickly shoved the document into the nearest drawer knowing immediately who it was. She didn’t even see his vehicle parked out front. His stealthy ways never ceased to amaze and annoy her.

She tried to compose herself and took a deep breath before she opened the door. Victor pushed his way in and looked around the room frantically as if searching for something.

“What are you looking for?” she asked, perplexed by his demeanor.

Without saying anything, he opened the door to her private restroom and scanned the room before facing her.

“Why are you here with your door locked, Elsa?” he put his hands on his hips and glared down at her as his shoulders heaved with his ragged breathing.

“I already told you, there’s nothing at home for me.”

“You’re holding something back. I can see it. You’re nervous,” his voice was rough with anxiety.

Victor was good at reading body language. Then again, Elsa had always been a terrible liar and it wasn’t difficult to see through her.

She blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “Whose fault is that? You make me nervous. I’m always afraid of what you’re going to do to me.”

It wasn’t a complete lie. In fact, it was the truth even if she was holding back that she had been reading his private thoughts. Victor shifted and ran his fingers through his hair. His body was still tense and she began to wonder what he thought she had been up to.

“What did you think was going on here?”

He shook his head but said nothing.

Her eyes widened when she saw the look of guilt easily readable on his face. “Oh, my God. Are you jealous?”

He rejected the notion straight away and looked past her. “Don’t flatter yourself. But just to clarify, rule number eight is that you’re to have no other lovers except me during our time together.”

The possessive desperation in his voice spoke more to his feelings than his could-care-less attitude and Elsa knew without a doubt he had been worried she was with another man.

To put his mind at ease she touched his chest. “Why are you so suspicious of me? I’ve never led you to believe I wanted to be with anyone else.”

He stepped back and puckered his mouth. “Well whose fault is that?” he mocked. “With your history of having affairs with coworkers…” he waved his hand and moved toward her desk.

The force of his cross reply took her off guard and she winced at his stern and unsympathetic words. He had a hell of a lot of nerve bringing up her past considering what he had been up to.

“You’re free to leave,” she narrowed her eyes at him.

Victor whirled to stare at her, his broad-carved face twisted in anger. “Excuse me?”

“You’re in my house and my rules apply here, so if you’re just going to bring up my mistakes, then get out.”

His mouth gaped open. Had no one ever dismissed him before?

“We all have things in our past we’re not proud of and I don’t need your condescending-I’m-Mr.-Perfect attitude.”

“I’m not perfect,” he gritted his teeth as he scanned her head-to-toe.

“I know,” she huffed. “What part of get out didn’t you understand?” she snapped.

He lunged at her and gripped the back of her neck with one hand and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her against his body.

“I will not be topped, Elsa. This is the only warning you get. Don’t you ever fucking talk to me like that again,” his tone was thunderous as he growled against her mouth, the scent of cigarette overwhelming her.

Her heart hammered in her ears as the sexy vision of Jordan trying to top Victor seeped into her thoughts. She swallowed tightly and when she pretended not to be affected, he gripped the back of her neck harder. As he glared down at her, she took in every line of his face and studied his powerful expression. Everything about this man was compelling and his magnetism was so potent she didn’t care what the consequences were of being with him.

***

The heat Elsa was putting off made Victor’s cock throb with such intensity he was finding it difficult to concentrate. When he had tracked her phone and found her at work, he was positive she was with someone else. All he could see was red as he drove to her. Shocked to find her alone, he was beside himself. She was up to something, however he had no idea what.

As he held her close and the mixed scents of their sex and her perfume and his cologne infiltrated his brain, his irritation began to subside. She smelled of him and it only proved that she belonged to him. But he would not be topped. More than one Chapter had already tried pulling that shit without success and Elsa was no different. Okay, she was different, but he wasn’t going to be controlled by anyone, most certainly not a little red-head who liked being conquered and fucked in the ass.

He could read her body like a book and right now she was mentally screaming to be fucked hard. He’d love to give her what she wanted except the longing look she was throwing his way scared the hell out of him. She was trying to see his ‘light’ again.

Abruptly he thrust her body away from him, making her gasp out. He would prove there was nothing but darkness in him once and for all and that he could go on with or without her.

“This weekend is cancelled so don’t bother showing up at Grace Street.”

Elsa’s body shuddered from his words and he felt a tinge of satisfaction from her reaction until she opened her mouth.

“I know what you’re trying to do – prove that you’re some cold-hearted, non-feeling asshole who has no light within him. That’s just fine, Victor. Keep pushing me away, but I’m already invested in this game and I’m not going anywhere. I’ll just see you on Tuesday. If not on that day, then on Wednesday. If not on that day, then next weekend. I can wait as long as you can hold out.”

Holy fuck this woman was impossible. He ground his teeth loudly and stomped out of the office and back to his car. He had no time for this bullshit. As soon as he drove away, he lit a cigarette. He had never smoked more than with Elsa. She was shredding away the layers of his cool exterior he had taken years to build up.

He was too blinded with everything else that was going on his life to figure her out. Maybe he could use a little help from his not-so-favorite convict and psychotherapist. He chuckled under his breath. Psycho was dead right. He laughed louder. Dead. If only he had the nerve to put a hit on Anthony and all the other homicidal sociopaths in the world, a great deal of his inner turmoil might be alleviated. Someday perhaps. If things didn’t work out with being a criminal profiler, he could always become a vigilante. He smiled evilly at the satisfying thought.

He took a long drag and blew is out slowly as he calmed himself. The Cambridge Killer was out there and he had more important things to deal with than this obstinate little wench. He would deal with her when he got back. In the meantime, he would drop off his notes on her at the Virginia Pen for Ant to peruse. Hopefully he could offer some insight into what made her tick.