Текст книги "Inside"

Автор книги: Brenda Novak

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Текущая страница: 11 (всего у книги 25 страниц)

14

A blanket of fog covered Highway 1, forcing Peyton to creep around the turns of the snakelike road hugging the rocky coastline. She couldn’t see the ocean to the right, or the towering redwoods to the left. Even when she rode the bumper of the car in front of her, she could barely discern its taillights. But she’d made herself wait until it was late enough that she could approach the motel without fear of being spotted and was relieved to finally be on her way—until she arrived. Once she’d parked around the corner and hurried to Virgil’s door on foot, she grew nervous because she had no idea how she’d be received.

“It’s me,” she murmured, following a brisk knock.

He opened the door, but he didn’t speak. Setting his knife on top of the TV—he’d come prepared in case she was someone else—he stepped back so she could enter.

The warmth of the room embraced her as she closed the door. The television was on, but Virgil wasn’t watching the kind of station most of the ex-cons she knew would pick. What with all the X-rated movies available on pay-per-view in this motel—she suspected that was part of the reason Rick Wallace preferred it—she thought a man in Virgil’s shoes would be taking in as much skin as possible. Pornography was expressly forbidden on the inside in any form, so it wasn’t as if he’d have another chance in the coming months. Instead, he was in the middle of a program about Egypt on the History Channel.

“I’m here to see if you’ll change your mind,” she said bluntly.

“About…”

Although he was dressed, she kept picturing him without his shirt as she’d seen him in her home last night. Her mind brought up other images, too, erotic images of them together, which made it strained and awkward to treat him as though he hadn’t had his mouth on her less than twenty-four hours ago. “Going inside Pelican Bay.”

He sank onto the bed and propped himself up on his elbows.

“No response?” she said.

“The fact that Laurel’s babysitter was shot gives me more reason to go in, not less, Peyton.”

She liked the way he said her name, the familiarity of it. “But you don’t understand. The people here… There’s not a lot going on this time of year. And thanks to the isolation, Crescent City’s like the typical small town where everyone knows everyone else’s business. Especially when that business has to do with the prison that supports us.”

“So?”

Why was he making her spell it out? “That means there’s less anonymity here than in some places. Folks notice the smallest details. Not only do they notice, they share every observation with others.”

Sitting up, he found the remote and muted the TV. “Someone’s said something to you?”

It was too warm in the room for the snug-fitting leather jacket she’d worn. She shrugged out of it as she explained what had happened with John. “His sister saw you at Raliberto’s with Wallace, and he read a text Wallace sent me about you,” she said when she came to the most significant part.

“I’m going in as Bennett, not Skinner,” he told her. “He’ll never connect me with that text. Chances are he’ll never connect me with the man his sister saw at the taco place, either.”

“Maybe not right away. But he can feel there’s been a change. And he’s asking questions. That makes me nervous.”

“Why would he be so curious?”

“General boredom. Like everyone else. And he was reprimanded for being overly zealous in breaking up a fight two weeks ago. One of the inmates wound up with a cracked skull that might’ve had nothing to do with the original altercation. John’s about to be disciplined for it, so he’s looking over his shoulder.”

“He’s got an abusive streak and he’s afraid it’ll cost him his job?”

She’d been afraid he’d jump to that conclusion. The investigation wasn’t complete, so she didn’t know for sure, but she sincerely hoped that wasn’t the case. “If I thought he was truly abusive, he wouldn’t be working at Pelican Bay. He panicked and used more force than necessary. It won’t happen again.”

“There’s a good chance you won’t hear about it even if it does.”

“How would he keep it from me?”

“There are ways to hurt people without cracking their skulls.”

“Don’t act like you know more about Pelican Bay or the people who work there than I do,” she said. “You haven’t even been inside. Not yet.”

“Doesn’t matter. One prison isn’t that different from the next.”

She shook her head. “I don’t want to get into a pissing contest with you, okay? I’m against having you go in. That’s all I’m here to say.”

“You’re spooked because of this guy. John. It’ll be fine.”

“You can’t be sure it’ll be fine.”

He got off the bed. “It’s not your decision, anyway.”

The wait, the pressure and the fear for his sister, not to mention that he probably felt somewhat responsible for Trinity Woods’s murder, had to be driving him crazy. He’d been on edge ever since she’d arrived. So had she. Add to that the tension between them—which they couldn’t relieve in the same way they had last night—and the surfeit of emotion threatened to erupt into an argument.

An argument over nothing.

Taking a deep breath, Peyton focused on her purpose. “Why not leave, go and get Laurel, disappear?”

“Because it’s not that easy—not without resources. And, in case you haven’t noticed, a man doesn’t build up a lot of resources in prison.”

“You’re sticking it out to get your compensation money?”

“No. Considering all the red tape, I don’t have much chance of getting that money. I’m doing it because life on the run is not what I want for my sister or her children. Someone who’s always lived in an ivory tower wouldn’t understand, but—”

“Excuse me?” she broke in. “I’ve never lived in an ivory tower.”

“You’ve never lived the way I have, either.”

“I work in the same kind of place.”

“By choice. You get to leave at the end of each day and pick up a hefty paycheck for your trouble. I don’t feel sorry for you.”

“I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. I’m only trying to help.”

“And I don’t need your help. I’ve told you that before. Quit treating me like some sort of…pity project. I’ll make it on my own.”

Feeling as if he’d just slapped her, she tensed. “You’re an asshole, you know that?”

“I’m doing the best I can to protect the people I care about, okay? If it works, Laurel will have a new identity. She’ll be able to remarry and live the rest of her life without fear and without running. I owe her that.”

“You do? Why?” she challenged. “Did you ask for this?”

He hadn’t expected that question. It took him off guard—she could tell—but he quickly rallied. “She’s the only person who’s ever been there for me.”

“When are you going to be there for you?”

He scowled. “You’re not making a damn bit of sense.”

“Then let me be clearer. I don’t want to see you hurt!”

He rolled his eyes. “Come off it. At least be honest. What happens to me has no bearing on you. We’re not even friends.”

Virgil had plenty of reason to be upset. But his responses were more personal and much harsher than Peyton had foreseen, and she wasn’t willing to put up with it any longer.

“Forget I ever came here.” Grabbing her coat, she turned to go, but he moved up behind her and put a hand on the door, holding it closed.

“Let me out,” she said, but only halfheartedly. She didn’t really want to leave. She wished she could lean into him, that he’d be as tender with her as he’d been last night.

But what he was feeling didn’t even resemble tenderness. She knew that when he spoke. His voice was low, grating. “I thought you didn’t date anyone who worked at the prison.”

Now he was looking for something else to fuel his anger. “I don’t.”

“Then what was John doing at your house?”

“I won’t dignify that with an answer. You have no say over what I do or who I see.”

“Did he bring a keepsake for your cabinet?” he asked, his lips brushing her ear.

She held the door handle in a death grip but didn’t turn it. “He brought me dinner, okay? That’s it. Now please let me go.”

“You just told me you turn him down whenever he asks you out.”

“I do.”

“It doesn’t sound as if you turned him down tonight.” Taking her coat, he threw it on the chair, but she didn’t face him. She wasn’t sure how their clash of wills would play out if she did.

She rested her forehead against the wood panel. “He’d already brought dinner. I didn’t have the heart to send him packing. He’s recently divorced, lonely. I think he’s looking for a friend.”

He slid his hand up under her T-shirt, leaving a swath of gooseflesh as he skimmed his fingers along her bare skin. When she didn’t resist, he changed direction and slipped his hand into her jeans, where his touch became far more intimate.

Get out of here before it’s too late. He was no longer holding the door. She could go. He wasn’t in the right frame of mind for this kind of contact, and neither was she. But knowing tonight was probably the last time she’d see him before he was incarcerated, she hoped for a better parting, one that would allow them to feel okay when they assumed their respective roles.

“Friendship isn’t what he’s trying to get from you,” he murmured. “He wants this.” His tongue plunged into her ear as two fingers claimed her with enough force to make her cry out. But it didn’t hurt. Pleasure burned through her veins.

“How do you know?” she breathed.

“Because I want it, too.”

Scarcely able to speak above the racket of her heart, Peyton squeezed her eyes shut. “We can’t…make this mistake again.” She wasn’t sure who she was talking to. That comment hadn’t really been directed at him. She was just grasping for a way to hold on to her resolve. But he answered.

“You’ve already given it to me once. What’s one more time?”

“It’s one more time.”

“Good thing you’re too nice to say no.”

She wanted to correct him. She wasn’t going along with this because she was “nice.” Nice had nothing to do with it—or him. Especially right now. She could sense his anger, but she didn’t complain, even when he peeled down her jeans and took her from behind without ceremony or foreplay.

Although she’d never been treated this roughly, feeling Virgil unleash his frustrations gave their coupling an eroticism that caused every nerve to quiver. He made sure she knew he was the one in control, but she felt safe with him at the same time. Physically, anyway. Emotionally, she hadn’t felt safe from the beginning.

The rhythm of their lovemaking escalated so fast they were out of breath within seconds. Then it was over as suddenly as it had begun and he withdrew as if he didn’t care any more about her than if he’d used a blow-up doll.

Stunned by such intensity followed by…nothing, she fixed her clothes while waiting to see if he’d say anything. Or kiss her. Or hold her. Or coax her to the bed.

He didn’t. He went into the bathroom without so much as a “thanks for the quick piece of ass” and closed the door.

He’d done this on purpose, she realized. He wanted her to hate him. And, in that moment, she did.

What the hell had he just done?

Cringing as the outside door banged shut, Virgil stared at the haggard image looking back at him in the bathroom mirror. He wanted to go after Peyton, to apologize, even beg her forgiveness. But he wouldn’t let himself. He deserved to have her go, would deserve it if she never spoke to him again. There wasn’t any point in pursuing her, anyway. She couldn’t possibly want him in her life, especially now. He’d acted no better than the other inmates he’d served time with—which, in a perverse way, was exactly what he’d been aiming for. He didn’t have anything to offer her. He needed to understand that and so did she.

He’d made his point. But he felt terrible about it.

“You’re a complete asshole, like she said,” he muttered, and splashed some water on his face before slumping against the wall. Did he really think that little power play could diminish her, make her any less than she was? That the harshness of his actions could obliterate how he’d begun to feel about her?

Not really. He didn’t want Peyton to matter as much as she did, so he’d taken steps to ensure that she stayed out of his life. It wasn’t fair to encounter someone like her when he was at such a loss, not after everything he’d been through. He wished he could relegate her to a different part of his brain or scare her away entirely. When he was bucking against her, telling himself he’d been using her from the start, it seemed to be working. He lost himself in lust and anger, had actually believed, for a few seconds, that he’d stamped out every other thought or feeling.

But in that final moment, he’d reached for her breast and felt something else, as well—something that let him know he hadn’t won the battle he was waging. The regret that’d washed over him then had left him feeling worse than ever.

She hadn’t put his medallion in a glass case with all her other keepsakes. She was wearing it.

15

John Hutchinson watched Peyton hustle away from the Redwood Inn Motel. He didn’t have to worry that she’d notice him. She wasn’t paying attention to anything except what was right in front of her.

Was she upset? Looked that way. She was jogging despite her sore ankle, even though he’d seen her favoring it an hour or so earlier. It could be the rain goading her on, of course. But he got the impression it was more than that.

What had happened at the motel? Who had she gone to see? And why hadn’t she parked in the lot? There were plenty of spaces….

She didn’t want anyone to know she’d been there. That had to be the reason. John couldn’t think of any other explanation.

Trailing her at a distance, he saw her round the corner and get into her car, which sat in front of a dark house one street over. That she’d walk a block on a bad ankle in wet weather was weird and definitely confirmed what his sister had told him—something was up.

Good thing he’d dropped in at a friend’s place before coming here or he never would’ve seen Peyton. Because he knew Wallace normally stayed at this motel, he’d stopped by to talk to Michelle. He thought she might be able to tell him about Wallace’s mystery companion. But he hadn’t expected Peyton to show up. When she’d sent him off, she’d used the excuse that she had a lot of work to catch up on. She hadn’t said a word about going out.

Yet here she was….

Did her visit have anything to do with that strange text she’d received from Wallace? About someone named Skinner? What did it mean?

John clung to the shadows of a neighboring house until Peyton drove away. Then he returned to the motel.

As he walked into the lobby, the bell sounded over the door. Michelle glanced up with a “customer service” smile, a smile that became noticeably more personal when she recognized him. “Hey, handsome. What are you doing here?”

He didn’t have any trouble getting Michelle—unlike Peyton—to respond to him. But he wasn’t really flattered by her attention. People who were that obvious in their loneliness came off as desperate. “Came by to say hello. What’ve you been up to lately?”

“Not much. Working. Taking care of my kids.”

Did she not realize that wasn’t particularly interesting? “Busy, huh?”

She smoothed the smock she had to wear as if she felt a bit self-conscious about the stain on the front. “Always. What about you? Everything okay at the prison?”

“That’s what I’m wondering.”

“What do you mean? Are you worried about what happened a couple weeks ago?”

She was referring to that fight he broke up. As much as he hated the fact that everyone knew, it’d been the talk of the town. Most casual acquaintances would be careful not to mention it, but she wasn’t very tactful.

“No. There’s nothing to worry about because I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“And everyone knows that,” she hurried to assure him.

The investigative lieutenant of ISU didn’t seem too convinced or the issue would’ve been resolved by now, but he didn’t want to discuss it, especially with someone like Michelle who said whatever came into her head. So he guided the conversation where he’d wanted it to go in the first place. “My sister told me Wallace was in town this week.”

“Only for one night.”

“What about the guy who was with him?”

“He hasn’t gone anywhere. He’s in room fifteen, if you want to talk to him.”

John had taken a risk assuming his sister was right and it had paid off. Wallace hadn’t asked someone to join him once he was at Raliberto’s. He’d had a companion to begin with, someone he’d brought to Crescent City. And Peyton knew that. Although he hadn’t noticed her in time to see which room she’d been in, he now felt quite confident it was room fifteen.

Why had she lied to him? And was this person associated with that odd text about someone dying? See if you can settle him down… Who—this guy?

“What’s his name?” he asked Michelle.

“Don’t know,” she replied with a shrug. “Room’s booked under the department, and I haven’t met him. I haven’t even seen him, to tell you the truth.”

“He hasn’t come out?”

She frowned as she shook her head. “Not on my shift.”

“What about the maids? Have they seen him?”

“I haven’t asked.” She got a funny look on her face. “Why are you so interested in this guy? Wallace will be back next week, if that helps. He reserved a room for Tuesday.”

This was news, too. Wallace wouldn’t return so soon unless he had important business. And whatever it was, Peyton wouldn’t talk about it. She’d even lied to cover it up.

This wasn’t about that scumbag pedophile he’d bashed in the head. It was bigger. A lot bigger.

As soon as she got home, Peyton threw her keys on the counter without bothering to see where they landed, pulled her cell phone from her purse and plopped onto the couch.

Allowing Virgil to use her proved she was in over her head. Where was her self-respect? She’d never had an illicit relationship with anyone before, hadn’t even slept with the C.O. she’d briefly dated after he’d given his notice. But she couldn’t seem to maintain any distance when it came to Virgil and that scared her. She had to change that, do whatever was necessary to get a grip on her behavior. And the only way she figured she’d be successful was to confess.

She needed to tell the truth, anyway. She couldn’t be hypocritical enough to hide such a secret while acting as if she’d done nothing wrong. A liar wasn’t the kind of person she aspired to be.

But would opening her mouth mean the loss of her job?

Possibly. The CDCR could call it malfeasance of office and put her on probation. They could transfer her somewhere else, maybe demote her. They could even dismiss her. It depended on how flagrantly, in their opinion, her actions had crossed the line. Virgil wasn’t on the state’s payroll. She had that going for her. He wasn’t a ward of the state, either. At least, not yet. Even after he went in, he wouldn’t be exactly like the other inmates because he’d be there voluntarily.

He fell into a gray area; and the gray aspects of the situation were what had gotten her in trouble. Maybe they’d save her, too. But her lack of professionalism had complicated an investigation on which the CDCR, even the governor, had pinned high hopes. She’d been told that she and Virgil would be working together—yet she’d slept with him.

That wasn’t right.

So who should she tell?

Determined to recover some dignity, she blinked rapidly to avoid the tears that threatened and scrolled through her electronic address book until she reached the warden’s number. Based on the chain of command, she should tell him. But it was almost midnight. She couldn’t disturb him this late.

Afraid she’d lose her nerve or attempt to justify her behavior if she waited, she thought about telling Rick instead. She was pretty sure he’d be awake. Last she heard from him, the marshal had arrived at the safe house to guard Laurel and he was boarding a plane to Sacramento. He’d said it was a direct flight, so he should’ve landed by now—or would be landing any minute.

“I really don’t want to do this,” she moaned. Rick wouldn’t be happy to hear she’d undermined their chances of success. But he was younger than the warden, more flexible about this type of thing, and she had a feeling he’d made his share of mistakes. Maybe that would inspire him to be at least a little understanding.

Her finger shook as it hovered over the keypad, but she forced herself to place the call and ignored the jittery feeling that came over her once the phone began to ring. That feeling only grew more intense when her call transferred to voice mail, because it meant she had to stew a bit longer.

Thirty minutes later, she was still stalking her living room, chewing her nails, when Rick finally returned her call.

“What’s going on?” he asked. “Did you speak with Skinner?”

“Where are you?”

“Walking to my car. Why?”

“Just curious.” She didn’t want him to be with anyone else when she told him this news.

“Have you heard from Skinner or not?” he asked again.

Slumping onto the couch, she groped for the words to tell him what she needed to say. “I did.”

“And?”

“He’s…fine.”

“He’s still going through with it?”

“Definitely.”

Wallace sighed loudly enough for her to hear. “Good. I was afraid we were in a bit of a mess.”

“Mess” was the perfect segue. Taking hold of Virgil’s medallion, which hung around her neck, she gathered her nerve and confronted her guilt. “There’s just one…problem.”

“What’s that?”

“I’m afraid I have…something to tell you. Something you won’t like.”

“About…?”

A tear escaped. She wasn’t used to being in this position, had always been so cautious to avoid censure. Terrified that she’d lose everything she’d worked so hard for, she clutched the medallion more tightly. She had only herself to blame…. “Virgil Skinner.”

“You said he was fine.”

“He is, but…I’ve had an inappropriate relationship with him,” she blurted out. Stunned silence.

“Rick?” she ventured.

“Does inappropriate mean what I think it means?” he asked.

Leaping to her feet, she began to pace. She considered trying to explain how deeply Virgil affected her, but she refused to offer excuses, especially that one. She didn’t want to acknowledge that he held any power over her. Wallace wouldn’t care to hear it, anyway, and probably wouldn’t understand the compelling nature of what she felt for Virgil. She didn’t even understand it. “Yes.”

“You slept with him?”

Her stomach muscles cramped. “Yes.” More than once. “Why? My God, you’re so uptight about rules and doing what’s right, I never dreamed you’d do something like this. You barely met him!”

She flinched. “I know.”

He covered the phone and hollered, “Mind your own business,” and she imagined the shock of those who must’ve overheard his part of the conversation. She almost asked him to wait until he was in his car before they finished discussing this, but he was already railing at her, as if he didn’t care whether or not he made a spectacle of himself. “I can’t believe this! Maybe if you were someone else I could see it. Your friend Michelle is so hungry for a good screw she nearly salivates when she meets a prospective—”

“Leave Michelle out of this,” Peyton broke in. “She’s had it rough the past year.”

He continued as though she hadn’t interrupted. “But not you. Nothing shakes you.”

“Unlike Michelle, I haven’t just been through a painful divorce.”

It didn’t seem to matter what she said. “While we were at the library, you and Skinner didn’t even seem to like each other.”

She fingered Virgil’s medallion again, felt the heat of it. “I’m sorry.”

The tenor of his voice changed, suddenly dropped. “He didn’t force you, did he?”

She wondered if he’d be willing to forgo this investigation if she answered in the affirmative but she wasn’t going to make Virgil look bad just to test Rick. “No.”

“Not at all?”

“Not at all.”

The protracted silence became almost unbearable. “I haven’t told the warden yet,” she said. “I didn’t want to wake him. But…I’ll talk to him in the morning.”

“No, you won’t.”

She stopped pacing. “What?”

“He doesn’t even know Skinner’s—Bennett’s—an ex-con. And keeping it from him was your idea, remember?”

“It was your idea first. You lied to all of us.”

“But I was willing to bring Fischer in on the secret once you found out.”

“I realize that. It’s not too late. Maybe it’s time for full disclosure.”

“No. Don’t tell Fischer or anyone else anything, do you understand?”

“I don’t think so. I’m not proud of what I’ve done but I feel I should accept the consequences.”

“Consequences…” He laughed bitterly. “Let me tell you what the consequences will be. They’ll begin with several uncomfortable meetings where you’ll have to explain your conduct in detail.”

She winced. “I’m prepared to be honest.”

“Even if it puts an end to any career advancement for the next decade or two?”

Refusing to let him undermine her courage, she squared her shoulders. “I can’t base the truth on what the punishment will be.”

“Shit!”

“What?”

“You’re not the only one it’ll affect.”

“Excuse me?”

“Even if this narrows future opportunities, your reputation will work in your favor. That means you’ll probably retain your post, at least for the time being. Instead of canning you, they’ll yank Virgil.”

She experienced a flash of relief. This was what she’d been hoping to achieve when she called him. Virgil wouldn’t be incarcerated, and she wouldn’t be tempted anymore. “Then they’ll yank Virgil.”

“I won’t let it go that way. We have it all set up. Everything’s ready.”

He was already writing his acceptance speech for his next promotion. “Maybe putting a stop to the investigation as it stands would be the right thing. I’m not sure Virgil will be safe at Pelican Bay.”

His voice rose. “You did this to get what you wanted from the start!”

“That’s not true!”

“Isn’t it? You never liked the idea.”

“That doesn’t mean I’d sabotage it!”

“Then listen. You’ve reported your behavior. I’ve reprimanded you, you’ve promised you’ll never make that mistake again and now it’s over. Forget it.”

She nearly dropped the phone. “Forget it? That’s it?”

“Yeah. Consider your conscience clear. Who cares whether or not you were together? It doesn’t affect anything. You think I’m going to toss this whole investigation because you wanted to get laid by a piece of prison trash?”

Peyton ground her teeth. “He’s not prison trash, Rick. He didn’t kill his stepfather. He’s no different than you or me.”

“Yes, he is, Peyton. He’s killed. That makes him a whole lot different. If you don’t think he’s dangerous you’re wrong.”

“You don’t know him.”

“Neither do you! One cheap lay and you’re an expert on this guy? Are you really that infatuated with him?”

She remembered how Virgil had treated her at the motel. “No,” she said, but then she tried to be more honest, since that had been her intent in the first place. “I don’t think so. It’s all a bit confusing. I…I don’t want anyone to be hurt.”

“It’s the Hells Fury who’ll be hurt. Irreparably, I hope.”

He could imagine the headlines. But she feared those headlines would say something different than he hoped. “You don’t know that the damage will stop there.”

“I’ve got too much riding on this investigation to flush it down the toilet over a little bump and grind. So you gave him a ride. What does it really matter? You’re two consenting adults, right? Hell, I was thinking I should hire the poor guy a hooker considering how long he’s been behind bars. Now I won’t have to.”

Peyton straightened her spine. “Thanks for treating me with respect despite my mistake,” she said in a withering voice. “It means a lot to me.”

“Hey, you can thank me when I come back to town.”

“What do you mean?”

“As long as you’re giving it away for free, I’m next in line,” he said, and hung up.

Surely he was joking. Wallace was married; she wouldn’t let him near her. She hoped he understood that, but it didn’t matter whether he did or not. He’d learn. She just needed to keep her distance from Virgil, and she’d soon be in control of her life again.

Dropping her phone on the couch to free her hands, she removed his medallion and went to hide it in a drawer.