Текст книги "Falling from Grace "

Автор книги: Annabel Chant

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Текущая страница: 7 (всего у книги 10 страниц)

Nineteen

As the first strains of music crept out across the audience, people were still laughing and shouting, but as soon as Liv began to sing, the room fell silent. Her voice, though low, was rich and melodic, and it stopped the audience in its tracks.

I recognised the song straight away. It was one Leo and I had danced to when we’d first met, and the memory brought back the hurt all over again. We’d been happy then. He’d been a youth team player, and I was at college. He’d come to our student prom with a friend and we’d fallen in love almost at once. He was awkward and shy, and it had taken him the whole evening to get up the courage to ask me out. From the moment he had, we’d been inseparable.

The song brought it all flooding back but, after the initial shock of hearing it, the pain began to dwindle. I was too interested in the way Liv sang it. For such a dainty creature, she could sure kick out a tune. She’d put her own twist on it, taken a light love song to another plane entirely…dragged it kicking and screaming into a power ballad. She’d destroyed the original for me forever, and I was glad. There was a gothic edge to this version, too, which gave it a haunting quality. The audience loved it and, as she sobbed out the final notes, they yelled and cheered for more.

I put my empty glass down on the sawdust-strewn floor and clapped, feeling almost as proud as if it were me up there, drinking in the applause. Liv was loving it, beaming out at the audience and squinting against the bright lights. She spotted me and waved excitedly. Then her smile faded. She seemed to be looking behind me, and worry was etched into her face.

I turned to see what she’d been looking at. Chris and Stef were standing either side of me, drinks in their hands. I smiled at them both, relieved to have some company to take my mind off Leo.

‘Come with us,’ Stef said, handing me a beer. ‘Meet our mates.’

I followed them to the farthest corner of the room. There was a cluster of young guys there, sitting on benches. They all had surfer-dude hairstyles and tight tee-shirts that strained across their chests, and they laughed and cheered as we walked over to them. I felt awkward and shy.

‘Here she is.’ Stef pushed me forward. ‘This is Grace, and she’s on her own.’

‘Not anymore,’ one of the guys said. ‘Come and sit with us, babe.’

The benches were full, but Chris stepped forward and ducked down onto the end of one of them. He pushed the guys along and held out his hand to me. ‘Here, Grace. Sit on my lap.’

‘I…’ I hesitated and then, suddenly, it hit me. What the hell. I was single. I wasn’t looking for love. I might as well have some fun. ‘Okay,’ I said, and sank down onto his knee. All the guys laughed, and I smiled around at them, no longer caring what they thought of me. I guzzled down another half glass of beer, before putting both glasses on the table.

The rest of the guys introduced themselves. I didn’t catch their names…there were too many of them, and Liv had just started another song, so I couldn’t hear very well. It didn’t matter, anyway. It wasn’t like I was going to see them again.

The song was one Liv had written a few years before, and I’d heard it before. It was called ‘Want Your Money’ and it was more upbeat than the first one, with an Irish undertone. I was still perched on Chris’s knee, and he began tapping his foot to the music. It was that kind of song. The audience were all moving now, and the dance floor was getting more and more crowded. It was like a heaving, seething mass, with the occasional wrecker spilling out into the bar area.

Chris was swaying his knee as he tapped his foot, and I couldn’t help myself. I began to wriggle in time to the music. The feeling of his knee pressing and moving between my legs stirred something inside of me and, when he put his hand to my cheek and turned my face to his, I let him kiss me.

It was the first time I’d kissed anyone but Leo since I was in my teens, and it felt strange. I drew back, wondering what the hell I was doing, but he pulled me in close again, and pushed my mouth against his. His lips were dry and firm, and his breath smelt sweet from the beer. This time, when he put his hand to my jaw, I let him pull down my chin and push his tongue into my mouth. I let out an audible sigh, and the guys laughed and whooped.

I pulled away again, looking around at them. I wanted to stop, but Chris’s knee was still working its magic between my legs. The beer wasn’t helping, neither was the darkened room. It gave me a strange sense of being in a dream and, just as in any dream, my inhibitions seemed to have drained away.

Stef put his hands either side of my head and, pulling me away from Chris’s mouth, turned my face up to his. ‘Don’t I get one?’ he said, his eyes flashing suggestively.

I didn’t think twice. I opened my mouth to meet his, and let his wet tongue push between my teeth until it was moving and twisting against my own. Chris had moved his hands to my hips, and was pulling me down harder onto his knee. I squirmed against it, loving the feeling of it rubbing and forcing itself up into me. When he loosened his grip, and let his hands trail up my sides, I did nothing to stop him. He moved them round to my front, until he was cradling my breasts in his hands, inching up my sweater as he did so.

Several of the other guys had stood up now, and were standing around us watching, but I hardly noticed them. Stef was still kissing me, bending down over me and rubbing his fingers across my clit. I bucked and writhed on Chris’s knee, loving the dual stimulation. It was as if the rest of the room had vanished, and I was back in my fantasy. When Stef pulled back and lifted up his hand to my mouth, I sucked on his fingers, looking up at his leering face, completely unashamed.

The guy next to Chris was running his hand up and down my thigh now, catching my clit with every upward stroke and teasing me into a frenzy. Stef was pressing my face against his crotch, rubbing my cheek backwards and forwards across the bulge in his jeans. My tongue trailed across it as it moved back and forth. The buttons of his fly caught at it with each pass, but I hardly noticed.

The song was nearly over, but I didn’t notice. I hardly even registered it when it stopped short. Chris was still squeezing my breasts, and I could feel the warm air on my stomach as my sweater rose higher and higher.

Suddenly, Stef put his hand to the back of my head and grabbed a handful of my hair. He tugged on it, pulling my head back. I looked up into his eyes and he grinned down at me, before looking around his mates. I followed his gaze around and, when he snapped my head back to his crotch, he was fumbling at his fly with his other hand. He’d already tugged most of the buttons open and, as I watched, he delved into the opening and, hooking his thumb behind it, flipped out his length.

I just stared at it for a moment, before looking back up at him. He gave me a filthy smile and nodded down at it.

‘Come on, you little beauty,’ he said. ‘Let’s see you lick my lollipop.’

He struck me across the face with it once…twice…three times…before dragging it slowly across my lips. I put out my tongue and let the dry hardness of him run across it, back and forth before he pulled my head back and plunged himself into my mouth. At almost the same moment, I felt Chris hitch the remains of my sweater up and over my breasts, exposing my thin, lacy bra. Even through the rhythmic driving of Stef into my mouth, and the insistent stroking of the other guy’s fingers on my clit, I was aware that my bra wouldn’t be affording much in the way of cover, and that my nipples were all but exposed, but I didn’t care. It was as if my fantasy had come true, and I was loving every second of it. All other thoughts had gone from my mind. I was reclaiming what was mine, and to hell with Leo. To hell with relationships. This was all I needed. I was going to be independent from now on, and take back my fantasy, and…

‘What the hell are you doing, Grace?’

I pulled back, letting Stef’s cock spring free. There was a gap in the circle now, and Liv was standing there, staring at me aghast. The lights were coming on.

‘She just leapt off the stage,’ I heard someone say. ‘The crazy bitch.’

I looked up at Stef and then turned to Chris. Stef looked shocked and annoyed. He started to stuff his cock back into his jeans, swearing. Chris just looked guilty. He held up his hands and shook his head.

‘Hey!’ said Stef, as Liv grabbed my wrist and pulled me to my feet. ‘She was loving it.’

Liv dragged me through the crowded room, towards the exit.

‘She’s not herself,’ she kept repeating to people as we passed them. ‘She’s been through a lot recently.’

I wanted to argue, to tell her to leave me alone, but I couldn’t. Now I was on my feet again, I felt sick and dizzy.

‘For Christ’s sake, Grace,’ she said, as she dragged me up the stairs and out into the cool of the Islington evening. ‘You’ve got to get a grip. I know it’s been tough, but you can’t go around behaving like that…you just can’t.’

I followed her, feeling more and more nauseous by the moment. My stomach felt like a tight ball and my brain was swooshing around in my skull. I could barely take in the street, but what little I could make out, through the spinning blur of my mind, was distorted, the proportions all out of whack.

‘I…’ I said. ‘Liv…’ and I threw up, right there in the middle of Islington High Street.

When we finally got home, Liv helped me into bed. I lay there, feeling limp and washed out, the posters on the wall throbbing and spinning around me. I closed my eyes, and held my head.

‘Let this be a lesson to you, young lady,’ Liv said, in mock serious tones.

I managed a weak smile. ‘I’m sorry I ruined your gig…I don’t know what I was thinking of.’

‘Nor do I.’ Liv sighed. ‘But it can’t happen again. Okay?’

‘Okay,’ I said.

‘Promise?’

‘Promise.’

‘Good.’ She sounded satisfied. ‘If you need me, just holler.’

I managed a smiled and watched her leave, wondering when the room would stop whirling round and whether, after tonight, I’d be able to keep my promise.

Twenty

I hardly slept a wink all night, wondering what I was going to do. I’d driven past Rick’s on the way home, but his car wasn’t there. He wouldn’t have been stupid enough to go back there, anyway, I was sure. He might have been impulsive, but he had some sense. I woke up groggy and with a hard-on. It was when I noticed this, that I realised I’d been dreaming about Grace Anderton. I’d been lying in bed, and she was leaning over me, sucking my cock. She’d been looking up at me as she did so, her dark blue eyes focused firmly on me, and I’d been staring back at her, unable to break my gaze. That was all I could remember, and it just showed how much I’d let her affect me.

Christ, I’d never even met the girl – not really. Max hadn’t even introduced her to me – he was too pissed off at the time. Why was I obsessing over a girl I’d never even spoken to? I’d see her tonight, anyway, if my people had done their job. Jimmy Crawford, Hart’s agent, had assured them she’d be there, and I was in no doubt she would be. She was lapping up the attention. Grace Anderton, I wasn’t so sure about. She’d gone into hiding, from what I’d been able to gather, and I didn't know if even Kitty Hart would be able to convince her to break cover.

Still, at least Hart would be there. I had to keep telling myself I was doing it to protect her. She was the one who was acting recklessly, after all…shooting her mouth off about herself and her husband on all the news channels, and throwing herself at men wherever she went. She’d done it the night before – left a club in the West End plastered all over some guy or other – and the news was full of it this morning.

The way she was going, she was going to wind up less popular than her lying, cheating husband. Yes, I was doing it for Kitty Hart. The fact that I couldn’t give a flying fuck about the girl, or her big mouth, was neither here nor there. Every time I came close to admitting to myself that it was all about Grace Anderton, it sounded weird, if not stalkerish, even to me.

As soon as I was dressed, I went round to Rick’s house. As expected, Sandy was there. He wasn’t.

‘Oh yeah?’ she said, holding the door half shut against me. She was still in her dressing gown, and there was a bull terrier behind her, trying to get out, so I guessed that was why. I wasn’t sure though, looking at her hostile glare. ‘It’s you, is it?’

I couldn’t help thinking how similar her greeting was to the girl yesterday at the flat – even down to the dressing gown – and how it’d be nice for someone of the opposite sex to be pleased to see me, for a change. Of course, there were plenty of women who were always pleased to see me. At Dominion, the F Bar and the various other hotels and establishments I owned throughout the City, the girls were more than interested. Shame that didn’t do it for me. I’d had a lifetime of girls throwing themselves at me because of who I was. I’d moved on from that a long time ago.

‘He’s not here,’ said Sandy, lighting a cigarette. She’d been beautiful when she was younger. You could still see it, but now she was faded and pinched all over. ‘I thought he was with you, but apparently not.’

‘No,’ I said. ‘But I do need to see him. Urgently.’

‘Probably got himself another fancy woman.’ She took a deep drag on her fag, and leaned her head against the wall. ‘He must think I’m stupid.’

I went back to the car, and just sat there, wondering what to do next. I tried ringing Giles again, but there was still no reply. I’d have to stop by his chambers, but I didn’t relish the thought. I started the car and pulled away. Sandy was still on the doorstep, smoking her fag and watching me. I felt sorry for her. She wasn’t a bad woman, just a terrible judge of character.

I was halfway to Westminster, when the phone rang. Giles, I thought. At last. But it wasn’t Giles at all. It was Rick. I knew it was him straight away, even though the voice was muffled and the number withheld. ‘Boss?’ he said. He spoke quickly, as if he were nervous. And well he might be, I thought grimly. What the fuck did he think he was playing at?

‘Yes,’ I said. ‘Where are you?’

‘Wouldn’t you like to know?’ He gave a short laugh.

‘I would, yes,’ I snapped. ‘Don’t play games with me, Rick. You don’t know what you’re fucking with.’

‘Don’t I, though?’ he said. ‘I know more than you think I do.’

‘Such as?’

‘Such as the identity of dear, sweet little Fliss.’

‘Don’t bluff me, Rick.’ I could feel the sweat starting to form on my brow. I wiped at it with the back of my hand. ‘I’m not in the mood.’

‘No bluffing, Sir.’ The sarcasm in his voice rattled me. ‘I followed her home that night, too. I know exactly who she is.’

‘Then you’ll know better than to play games,’ I said, his words sending a chill through me.

‘I don’t intend to play games.’ There was a pause, as if he were looking for the right words. ‘I intend to get what I’m owed.’

‘I tried to give you money last night,’ I said. ‘You think this is going to help you?’

‘You don’t understand.’ His voice cracked. ‘I’m in real trouble. Charlotte…she’s been blackmailing me. I owe big time and, if I don’t pay it off, I’ll lose my house…lose Sandy…the kids.’

‘Give me Charlotte’s address,’ I said. ‘I’ll sort it.’

‘I don’t have it.’ He sounded desperate. ‘I’ve been to the address she gave me. There’s no one there. I left a…message, but I haven’t heard from her since.’

‘I saw,’ I said, remembering the dead cat. God, he must’ve been desperate, but the working girl, Jane, had been right. He was a sick fuck. ‘I could’ve helped you, Rick. You should’ve told me. It should never have come to this.’

‘Well, it has.’ His voice was calm now, emotionless. ‘And right now I need real money. Not the kind of pay-off you’d have given me last night.’

‘You signed a confidentiality clause,’ I said. ‘I’ll sue your ass off if you try anything, and then you will lose everything.’

‘You won’t.’ There was an air of confidence to his statement, even as his voice trembled. ‘Not while I’m sitting on this tape.’

‘So, what then?’ I could see where it was going, but I knew I had to hear the words…hear how much.

There was a pause before he spoke again. ‘Five hundred thousand,’ he said, finally.

‘Five hundred thous…’

‘Used notes. I’ll be at Dominion tomorrow night.’

No wonder he’d paused. He was really gambling. Even I’d have trouble finding that in loose change, especially by tomorrow evening. My to-do list was growing ever longer.

‘Okay,’ I said, getting ready to turn the car around. I couldn’t face seeing Giles right now, even though I needed to. If he asked me about the tape, I didn’t trust myself to be able to lie convincingly. ‘I’ll sort it.’

Rick rang off, and I just sat there for a while, staring at my mobile and wondering what the hell else could go wrong today.

Twenty One

I still felt like death itself the next morning. I spent most of the day in bed, asleep. The phone kept waking me, though. Once, it was Kitty’s smarmy-sounding agent, Jimmy, and the rest were Leo. I arranged to meet with Jimmy on the Friday afternoon. Leo, I ignored completely. He kept ringing though and, desperate for some peace to soothe my banging head, I finally turned off my phone. Just the act of doing so, of taking a bit of control back, made me feel somewhat better, and I sunk into a deep sleep from which I’d only just woken when Liv came in from work.

This time when I woke up, I lay there replaying what I could remember of last night’s events in my mind. As I remembered the incident with the Australian guys, I wailed inwardly. God, had I really done that? What the hell must Liv have thought?

But even through the hideous shame of it, I couldn’t help but start to feel turned on all over again. The familiar surge of sensation flooded into my clit, and I hardly even noticed my hand moving down there. I let my thighs fall apart, as I remembered the roughness of their hands on me, the urgency of Stef’s cock in my mouth, the upward slide of my sweater over my breasts.

What would have happened if Liv hadn’t interrupted us? If they’d taken me somewhere else, where they could properly use me? I knew I’d have been in trouble but, even so, the thought of it sent shivers of anticipation through my clit. My imagination wandered, and soon I was back in my fantasy, but this time with a difference. It started in Jackaroo’s, with Stef and Chris and the rest of the guys, just as it had last night, but instead of Liv coming to my rescue, they’d carried on; Stef thrusting into my mouth, Chris finally pulling my breasts free of my bra, and the guy next to me undoing my jeans and inching them down across my hips.

It was only when I was truly exposed, naked on Chris’s lap, with his cock pushing inside me and Stef plunging once again into my mouth, that it all went wrong. It wasn’t my fantasy any more. It was Leo’s reality and, when I looked up at Stef, and all the other guys standing around us, it was Leo’s face, once again, looking back at me.

I pulled my hand away as if it’d been stung, and just lay there, staring at the poster-strewn walls, and wondering whether I’d ever be able to keep my promise to Liv.

She didn’t seem any more convinced, when I was getting ready to go out with Kitty, an hour or so later.

‘I don’t think you should go,’ she said, at least ten times, as she stood behind me in her tiny bathroom, watching me apply the finishing touches to my make-up. Disapproval was etched all over her face. ‘Not after last night.’

‘I know,’ I said. ‘You keep saying. I won’t get drunk, I promise, but I’m going.’

It wasn’t just the thought of getting it in the neck from Kitty that made me determined to go. For one thing, I was dying to know what was so special about the venue. I’d been to most of the decent clubs in London with Leo, but the F Bar had never crossed my radar. For another, Leo had been out the night before, with some brunette, and had been snapped getting into a cab with her. Hence the reason I’d ignored his calls. I was determined to go one better, although I didn’t mention this to Liv, for obvious reasons.

‘Well, just make sure you behave,’ she said. She was clucking about me like a mother hen; rearranging my hair and checking under my eyes for smudges. ‘I wish I was coming with you, I do, but I just can’t. Max has gone abroad unexpectedly, and, well...you know.’ She made a face.

I could read her like a book. I knew she felt as if she should be there, to keep me in check, but the thought of spending more time in the company of Kitty made her want to run for the hills. I was glad she wasn’t going, anyway, in the nicest possible way. I wasn’t sure I wanted to be kept in check.

‘I don’t think you’re on the VIP list, anyway,’ I said, with a wicked grin.

‘Dayum,’ she said, clicking her fingers in disappointment.

Just then, there was a knock at the door.

‘Quick, it’s the taxi,’ she said, peering out her bedroom window. ‘Hurry up.’

I grabbed my bag, and walked gingerly down the stairs. I was wearing a sleek midnight-blue dress and high sandals. I hadn’t worn anything but flats for the last few days, and I didn’t want to have an accident. I hoped Kitty would approve of my outfit. My dress was a sleeveless silk shift, spattered with diamantés and open down the back, and it was the shortest I had with me. I’d told myself I was getting dressed up to please her, but secretly I knew it was because I wanted to attract attention. As the thought was made explicit in my mind, I flushed. What a difference a day made. Something had twisted inside me, something small but significant, and I was half ashamed but, at the same time, powerless to halt it. Christ, I didn’t even want to halt it.

I tiptoed down the path to the taxi, carefully avoiding the cracks in the paving. My heels were sky-high Louboutins, diamanté-studded to match my dress. I didn’t want to ruin them this early in the night. Liv followed me out, still fussing around me. She seemed increasingly stressed, and I could tell she was now seriously regretting not coming along.

As I went round the other side of the cab, she tapped on Kitty’s window. Kitty wound it down and looked out.

‘Don’t leave her, whatever you do,’ Liv said. ‘Promise me.’

‘I promise,’ Kitty said, sounding taken aback. ‘I wasn’t planning to.’

‘Good.’

I could tell Liv was still anxious, and I leaned across to give her a smile. ‘I’ll be okay,’ I said, holding out my hand to squeeze hers.

‘Don’t sweat it, honey,’ said Kitty with a giggle.

I pulled my hand in quickly, as she wound up the window, and the taxi pulled away.