Текст книги "Falling from Grace "

Автор книги: Annabel Chant

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Текущая страница: 6 (всего у книги 10 страниц)

Sixteen

I rang Giles again en route to the Castle. I knew now why the Herald hadn’t run the story yet. It would take time to get it written, and she might even be touting it around different papers. From the minute I’d seen that business card, I’d been jumping to conclusions. I was willing to bet, now, that if I’d managed to get the rest of the cards out of that case, they’d all have been different. Business cards for different journalists at different papers. Worst case scenario, this could all end in a bidding war between the tabloids, and then the shit would really hit the fan. It could be huge.

I didn’t care too much what they’d say about me. Everyone who knew me, knew what my life entailed, and why. Anyone else, I didn’t give a shit what they thought. But if they dug deep enough, all sorts of stuff could come out. Sordid stuff, the stuff of tabloid dreams, enough to derail the lives of people I’d sworn to protect. I couldn’t have that happen. It was essential I found her, and the only way I’d have time to do that would be if Giles could keep a lid on things for as long as possible.

There was no answer. His mobile went to answerphone every time. It was infuriating. At one point, I went to leave a message, before stalling and hanging up. I couldn’t leave one, couldn’t leave anything that could incriminate me. The Home Office were into everything, I knew that from the Fliss episode. Giles would do his best to fulfil his promise, but not at the expense of his career and, if he were questioned about his dealings with me, it could all come out.

I threw my mobile down on the passenger seat in disgust, and put my foot down. My brief stop at Charlotte’s fake address meant I’d be late to the Castle now, and I didn’t want to run the risk of missing Rick. I needed to speak to him urgently. There was something about all this that smacked of his handiwork. I had a mole – that much was clear – and, if I wasn’t mistaken, Rick was the small mammal with the shovel hands and the velvety black coat. If so, he was my best – and worst – chance of putting this whole thing to bed.

The rush hour traffic thinned out as I headed into Berkshire, and I was actually early as I swung into the long gravel driveway of the Castle. I always drove fast, and my growing sense of urgency had driven the milometer through the roof. The security guards had opened the gate for me ahead of time, and I drove down through the avenue of trees unhindered, which was more than anyone else would be able to do.

The old family pile looked magnificent in the sunset, and I wished I was happier to come here. No matter how often I did – and depending on what was going on and who I was trying to help, it was sometimes frequently – it always stirred up old memories, and never happy ones. I considered stopping in at the east wing and paying my respects to the aged relatives, but I couldn’t face it. Anyway, respect for that quarter was hard to come by.

I parked by the front doors, and looked up at the place. I didn’t usually bother. I’d seen it a million times before, but tonight the sun was setting behind it, and the turrets were silhouetted against a blaze of orange and gold. It could almost be a real castle, rather than a Victorian mansion with delusions of grandeur. It amused people to call it the Castle, though, particularly due to the kinds of things that went on here.

I was about to walk up the steps to the front doors, when a frail voice called my name. I stopped, with an affectionate sigh, and turned round. It was my mother. She’d been hidden in the shadows and my eyes, dazzled by the sunset, hadn’t picked her out.

‘Good evening, Mother,’ I said, immediately falling back into the formal speech patterns I’d had drummed into me from such an early age.

‘Oh, my darling,’ she said, rushing forward with her arms open. ‘Let me look at you.’

‘I’m just the same, Mother.’ I surrendered myself to her bony embrace, pecking her dry-powdered, paper-thin cheek in salutation. ‘How are you?’

‘Sooo happy,’ she said, clasping her hands to her breast. ‘I’ve heard from her again!’

‘Heard from…?’ My heart sank. She wasn’t getting any better. Worse, if anything.

‘From Aimee, you…silly boy.’ She gave me a stern look. ‘You know very well. Have…have you heard from her?’

‘No, Mother, of course not.’ I hated this, but I had to try to keep her grounded. ‘You know she’s dead.’

‘Oh, you!’ She smiled a wild, dreamy smile. ‘You always say that!’

‘Yes, Mother.’ Well, at least she remembered that. ‘I do, because it’s true.’

She gave a secretive smile. ‘She’s alive to me.’

‘How’s Father?’ I didn’t really want to know, but it changed the subject.

Her smile faded instantly, and she turned back into her usual, distant self. ‘He’s…he’s the same.’

‘Oh.’ I looked at my watch. ‘I’ll try to pop in at the weekend, if I can. I have to go, Mother. Pressing business…’

‘Of course.’ She gave an absent nod.

I pecked her on the cheek again, feeling her fragile bones beneath my hug. She’d aged so suddenly, so instantaneously after…

A car pulled up on the drive, interrupting my thoughts and skidding to a halt right next to us. Gravel smattered everywhere. It was Rick.

My mother quailed behind me, and I put my arm across her in protection.

‘Sorry,’ said Rick, swinging out of his car. He was shielding his eyes against the sunset. ‘Didn’t see you.’

‘You cast-iron dick,’ I said, the anger swelling in me like a tidal wave. I turned to my mother and patted her hand. It was cold and claw-like, and I wondered, for the thousandth time, what had happened to her. Well, I knew, but it didn’t stop me wondering how it had aged her like this. ‘Go back to Father, Mother. You’re best off away from here.’

She nodded, still looking frightened, and scuttled off away in the direction of the east wing. I turned back to Rick. ‘You fucking write-off,’ I said, through gritted teeth. ‘Get inside. We’ve got a lot to talk about.’

Seventeen

‘We’re on the VIP list for the F Bar,’ I said, in tones of mock awe, as we came out of the tube at Islington.

‘Ooh, the F Bar.’ Liv put her hands to her heart, as if she might faint at the very mention of it. ‘What the fuck is the F Bar?’

‘Depends what F stands for, I guess,’ I said, laughing at her melodramatic pose.

‘Yeah,’ said Liv, dragging me across the road. ‘The Fuck Bar. That figures, knowing Kitty.’

Kitty had barely left the house when Liv had made double sure I knew she wasn’t kidding about going to her gig. ‘It’s for your own good,’ she’d said firmly. ‘If she was right about one thing, it was that you should fuck that bastard off right now. Get your life back. It starts here, Grace. Tonight.’

I’d protested, saying I wasn’t ready for it, I needed time to myself, to think, but she’d played her ace card.

‘Look, I’ve just finished with someone too. I need someone there, tonight, to support me.’

I couldn’t argue with that. Not when she’d welcomed me into her house so willingly. I had to be there for her. So I’d grabbed a quick shower and thrown on the first halfway suitable clothes I’d dragged out of my case. A sweater and jeans.

I’d been eyeing them doubtfully, when Liv came into the room.

‘Perfect,’ she said. ‘You’ll be right at home.’

As we walked into the bar she was playing at, I saw what she meant. Jackaroo’s was a travellers bar, targeted to young tourists who favoured a backpack over a suitcase, and it was pure spit-and-sawdust. Jeans were definitely the dress code here, followed closely by rugby shirts and tees. It was all bare wood, barrels and benches.

‘See,’ said Liv in my ear, as I looked around the upstairs bar. It was heaving, and noisy, with people pushing past all the time. I felt lost and out of place. ‘They’re all foreign. All of them. No one here will have a clue who you are. You can relax.’

I couldn’t see me relaxing at all, but I followed her as she pushed through the crowds towards the stairs that led down to where she was going to perform.

‘Where’s your equipment, anyway?’ I shouted at her, above the noise of the music, which was growing louder and louder as we went down the stairs.

‘Oh, that,’ Liv yelled over her shoulder. ‘Gav’s bringing it. Him and Celeste.’

‘Gav?’ I yelled back. I thought I’d misheard. ‘Celeste?’

‘Yes.’ We reached the bottom of the stairs. They opened out into a dance floor with a bar framing it on one side, and a stage on the other. ‘He’s in the band now. Took over from Mike. It’s how I know him.’

‘And Celeste?’

‘His ex.’ Liv rolled her eyes. She leant in towards me, to make sure I heard. ‘Plays keyboards. Hates me, obviously.’

‘Obviously.’ I nodded, wondering what the hell I’d let myself in for.

We went over to the bar, where Liv pushed through the crowds to order us beers. I kept expecting someone to have a go at her, but they didn’t. It was a lot more relaxed than the usual places I frequented in London. Either that, or Liv was a well-known face. But it was more than that. When I looked around, I realised that almost everyone was stoned. I could see it in their eyes, and smell it in the air. It reminded me of Gav.

Talking of which, there he was…walking towards us, through the crowds of backpackers. There was a blonde girl with him, hanging onto his arm. She had an upturned nose and a sneer on her face. My heart sank. Here we go.

‘Hey,’ he said, as he edged his way in next to us at the bar.

‘Hey,’ said Liv, looking over at the girl. ‘Hi Celeste.’

‘Hi.’ Celeste gave her a short, sharp smile, before turning to me. ‘Brought you as back-up, has she?’

I went to speak, but Liv cut me off. ‘I don’t need back-up. She’s here for other reasons. Get a life, Celeste, and a boyfriend of your own.’

‘Hey.’ Gav started to laugh, holding his hands up as if trying to calm them down. ‘Let’s cool it, shall we.’ The sniping clearly discomfited him. He turned from one to the other, not knowing what to say. I could see he was weak. He’d go whichever way was easiest and, for some reason, I despised him for it. The tension between Liv and Celeste was palpable, and neither spoke again…just glared at each other, while Gav pushed through to the bar.

I felt awkward and just stood there, sipping at my beer. The citrusy sharpness of it was so refreshing, and the alcohol hit me right away. It went straight to my arms, then my thighs, making them buzz and tingle. I realised I’d barely drunk anything all day, apart from the tea at Liv’s. I was so thirsty, suddenly. I took another sip, then tipped my head back and gulped the rest down.

I needed another one, right away. I pushed in behind Gav and ordered two more. Liv would need another one before she went on stage, after all, I told myself. It was the least I could do. I was so busy fluttering my twenty pound note at the bar staff, trying to grab their attention, that I didn’t even notice when Gav left the bar. More people had arrived since Liv had got our first drinks and the bar was three-deep now. I was being pushed and jostled from all sides, and I had to grab onto the bar to keep my place.

Finally, I got served. A young guy, with spiky black hair and a ring through his nose saw me and came over. He got me two more beers and took my money, but by the time I’d got my change and pushed my way back through the throng, Liv and the others had gone.

I stood there for a moment, looking around for them, then the music died, and the lights with it. The only ones left, apart from behind the bar, were shining on the stage. Gav was up there, doing something to his guitar. Every now and again, he’d play a few notes, then look off stage, to the side of him, and do it again. He looked a lot more at ease, under those spotlights, than he’d appeared a few minutes earlier. For the first time, I could kind of see what Liv saw in him. He had a definite presence on stage, even just doing a sound-check.

I looked around for somewhere to stand that was out of the way. I still felt uncomfortable, but I was starting to unbend a little, after the beer. I took a gulp of one of the beers in my hand, wishing I knew where Liv had gone. To cope with being on my own, I was going to need to unbend a whole lot more.

I spied a pillar in the middle of the bar area, where no one was standing, and made my way over there, careful to avoid spilling my beers. When I reached it, I leant up against it and tipped my head back again, gulping down the beer. I was so thirsty. Anyway, I needed to get rid of it. I looked ridiculous, standing there with two beers. I needed to lose one, and fast. I made short work of the rest of it, and put the glass down in the sawdust at my feet. Now I could concentrate.

I looked towards the stage. Liv was out there now, and Celeste, as well as the drummer. Some guy with long brown hair and a beard. I’d never seen him before. They were still getting ready and, occasionally, Celeste would play a short burst on the keyboard, and Gav and Liv would chime in. Then one of them would say something, and they’d all grin or even laugh. It was showmanship all the way, and they hadn’t even started. If I hadn’t witnessed it, I’d never have believed the rift that divided them was even real.

I started on the next beer, hoping they’d start playing for real soon. Then I’ll have something to focus on, instead of standing here all alone, feeling like an idiot.

‘You don’t look like an idiot,’ said a voice right in my ear. I jumped, and turned around. Had I actually said that aloud? I looked at my remaining beer. It was already half empty. Then I looked up at the guy that had spoken. He was young and tanned with curly blond hair, and crinkly eyes.

‘Well, I feel it,’ I said, taking another swig of beer.

‘Why are you all alone, anyway?’ he asked. His voice had a gentle Australian lilt to it which, in my slightly drunken haze, I found incredibly attractive. ‘Do you normally hang around bars on your own?’

‘Not normally, no,’ I said, trying to sound dignified. ‘It’s a new thing.’

‘Well, why do it?’ He looked genuinely puzzled. ‘I mean, a girl like you could have…’

‘Who’s this, Chris?’ Another voice came from behind me, cutting across him. I turned to see who’d spoken, and was confronted by another Aussie. This one was slightly taller than the first, and had rough dark hair, and stubble. The blond guy bridled, and put his hand on the pillar above me, as if staking his claim.

‘This is…’ He looked at me, questioningly.

‘Grace,’ I said, looking from one to the other, before taking another slug of beer.

‘G’day, Grace,’ said the dark guy. ‘Stef. Can I get you a drink?’

I looked down at my glass. It was almost empty again. I went to speak, when Chris cut in. ‘Hey, mate. I’ll get it. This one’s mine. Go and find your own.’

‘I offered first.’ Stef took a step forward, the planes of his chest standing out against his tee-shirt. ‘D’you want one, babe?’

‘I…’

‘I’ll get you one,’ Chris told me firmly, then to Stef; ‘Fuck off, mate.’

They squared up to each other, chest to chest, and I shrank back against the pillar. I watched them argue and, suddenly, it occurred to me why I’d despised Gav’s weakness so much. I was weak. I’d been letting people push me around ever since this whole Leo business had begun. First Max, then Leo. Even Kitty and Liv had argued over me, as if I wasn’t there, and now it was happening again. Jeez, I wasn’t even interested in these guys…not really.

It was time I took charge. ‘Look, you can both get me one,’ I said. ‘You can both have me.’

It didn’t come out quite how I meant it to, but it seemed to mollify them. They flashed each other a grin, then headed off to the bar, nudging each other as they went. Almost as soon as they’d gone, the band started up and I forgot all about them.

Eighteen

‘After you.’ I showed Rick into my office, which was on the upper floor of the castle, well away from the parts he was more used to patrolling. He’d been a good security guard over the years, and I was grieved that it had come to this, but he’d picked his path and there was nothing either of us could do now.

He stood in front of my desk. He didn’t say anything. He thought he knew what this was about, I could tell, and it was about that in a way, but it was about so much else, too. It was essential I caught him off-guard.

‘You’ve always had a thing for prostitutes,’ I said. I had my back to him, and I was staring out the window at the avenue of lime trees. ‘I’ve never understood it myself.’

‘You either get it or you don’t,’ Rick said. ‘Sir. It’s the thrill of it.’

‘And yet you have a wife.’

‘Yes sir.’

‘And you claim to love her?’ I turned to him. He was standing at my desk, practically to attention.

‘You know I do, Sir.’

‘So how does that work, exactly?’

He didn’t speak at once. He was shuffling from foot to foot, clearly uncomfortable with how the interview was progressing. I didn’t push him. In fact, I ignored him for a few moments, while I took the things out of my pocket I’d brought with me for safe keeping. The tape of Fliss for the vaults…the letters. I was going to go through them after this, see what information I could glean.

I looked up. ‘Well? How does your wife like the fact that you pay for sex?’

Rick obviously thought he’d risk a joke. ‘Well, if I paid her Sir, she’d probably do it more often.’

I didn’t crack a smile. ‘But it’s not her you pay.’

‘No.’

He was squirming, and I pinned him with a look, wondering how I could get through to him. He was such a contradiction. I didn’t understand him at all. The irony was that he really did love his wife. More than most men I’d known. He adored her, and yet still he screwed around behind her back.

‘Look,’ he said, finally. ‘She doesn’t know, you know that. She’d leave me. Sir.’

It was practically an appeal. I only stared back at him, unmoved. ‘So she doesn’t know about Charlotte, then?’

As the implications of the question sunk in, Rick paled visibly. By the time he attempted a reply, he was ashen, and he could barely get the words out. ‘N…now, Sir. I didn’t know anything about that. I…I thought she was just another call-girl.’

‘But you passed her for security clearance?’

‘Yes, Sir.’

‘For both Dominion and the Castle itself?’

‘Y…yes, Sir.’ His eyes were downcast, but then he looked up, desperation in his eyes. ‘She said she’d tell Sandy,’ he said. ‘I couldn’t have that.’

I shrugged. ‘You let it continue…let us all get sucked in,’ I said. ‘And you’ve still been using whores, knowing you could catch something and pass it on. What use are medical exams, if you go fucking around straight afterwards? Don’t you think about anything except your cock? You’ve put us all at risk and, last night, you disobeyed a direct order.’

‘I…’ He was wilting in front of me. He could see where this was going by now, and the fight had gone out of him. ‘I did it to get you off the hook,’ he said, but it was a lame excuse, and I could tell he knew it.

‘You know I’m going to have to let you go, don’t you?’ I said, turning again to stare out the window. I didn’t want to look at him. I hated this kind of thing, but he’d brought it on himself.

‘Oh, no, Sir.’ He spoke quickly now, the words tumbling out on top of each other. ‘Please, Sir. Where am I going to find another job like this? With pay like this?’

‘It’s not my concern.’ I shrugged and turned to him, trying to suppress my anger. ‘My only concern at the moment is protecting the people you’ve put at risk. Look,’ I relented slightly. ‘I’ll give you some cash to tide you over. After that, it’s up to you.’

I went into the room next door. I always had a decent amount of cash in the safe, for emergencies. It took a few minutes to get the combination lined up correctly. It was an old safe – it had been my father’s – but it was solid and dependable enough for the amount I kept in it.

Finally, I got it open, and counted out enough cash to give him a few months’ breathing space. I shut the safe quickly, and went back into my office.

Rick was gone. As I looked out the window, I saw his car hurtling away up the driveway, past the avenue of lime trees and out on the darkening roads of Berkshire. I wondered why he hadn’t waited…why he was leaving empty-handed and in such a hurry.

It was only when I turned back to my desk to sort out the rest of my business, that I found the answer. Rick hadn’t left empty-handed at all. He’d taken the tape, and the letters, with him.