Текст книги "Between Tides & Thunder"

Автор книги: Lena Kazak

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Текущая страница: 24 (всего у книги 27 страниц)

“What?” I sputter. “Why have you been doing that?”

She shrugs, a sly smile on her full lips. “I like watching him unravel. Sometimes, his jaw clenches so hard, I pretend his teeth have cracked. Yesterday, I swear he bit his tongue. It made my week.”

I burst into laughter, until tears leak from my crinkled eyes. Sura watches me, her lips quirked.

“Have you told him how you feel?” she asks.

I nod slowly, the memory of that night together in the tent still a lingering wound. “After we left the Tundrayni camp, I told him. He didn’t believe me. He was … he was cruel.”

Sura’s lips twist into a scowl.

“Tairna’s plan—you as queen. Would he rule beside you?”

“I don’t think so. He wants to leave the realm.”

“You could go with him.”

“What about the plan?”

Sura waves a dismissive hand. “As long as both tyrants are deposed, Tairna will figure something out. Even idiot Tumaas would make a better king. I want you to be happy.”

I don’t have the words to express my heart.

Sura sees me—accepts me. Despite everything, she still loves me.

“We’ll figure this out, Mayah.”

CHAPTER SEVENTY-FIVE

SUNLIGHT STREAMS THROUGH THE unfamiliar window, leaving me disoriented as I blink away sleep. The bed beside me is empty, sheets rumpled. Did Zev actually sleep beside me last night? Deep inhale. I scrunch my nose—honeysuckle. Not the smoky scent I was expecting.

“Still a heavy sleeper, I see,” a lilting feminine voice calls out.

Sura. I’m in Sura’s room.

I sit up as she emerges from behind her closet door, a large box clutched in her slender arms. The mattress dips as she settles beside me and unceremoniously plops the box in my lap.

“A gift,” she explains at my inquisitive glance. “I was planning to surprise you on your birthday, but after last night…”

I think you could use it now is what she doesn’t say.

“Sura, I—”

“Open it.” Her face is bright and beautiful and happy, and I’m in awe of her unbroken spirit. Her soul radiates enough light to brighten the darkness in mine.

The lid slides off the box easily, and Tides, inside is—

“Try it on!” she squeals.

I oblige her and return minutes later dressed in the most breathtaking fighting leathers I’ve ever seen. Smooth, supple leather in the palest shade of ice blue molds to my body like a second skin, hugging my thighs and chest. Brown, knee-high boots and fingerless gloves complete the set. Even a long cape, pinned at my shoulder, drapes down my back.

A fitted vest overlays the tunic, its pockets ready for knives and hidden blades. A wide, brown belt cinches my waist, weighted by a large canteen—not for drinking, but for wielding.

For the first time in my life, the mirror doesn’t reflect a delicate princess—a wolf in sheep’s clothing. A warrior stares back. The fighter I’ve always been beneath the silk and smiles.

“Thank you,” I whisper, my throat tight with emotion.

She only waves me off and pulls me into a fierce embrace. “It suits you,” she murmurs, brushing away my tears.

I manage a watery smile. “Breakfast?”

Sura shakes her head. “I have something to take care of. I’ll catch up with you later.”

I turned heads the entire morning in my new, form-fitting outfit.

But the only head that mattered was Zev’s.

He did a double-take when I strode into Tairna’s office, smoldering eyes raking over my curves. A muscle had feathered in his jaw, and I didn’t miss the way his knuckles blanched. Or the low warning growl that rumbled in his chest when Rycken’s gaze lingered too long. Lyzza had chuckled, pushing her friend’s face away, muttering something about death wishes.

Still, Zev hasn’t said a single word to me the entire meeting.

“The Volcan army has made land,” Tairna says, pointing to a spot on the map unfurled across her table. I shift closer, angling to see the map better, and my elbow bumps into Zev’s.

“Sorry,” I mutter. He ignores me.

Tairna’s dark eyes flit between us, her lips twisting like she wants to lecture her son. At least, I hope that’s what her expression means.

With a muted sigh, she returns her attention to the map. “Their forces will split into two and head here”—she traces a line cutting across the map to Arbinj—“and here”—another line to Tundrayn. “Our men from these camps will join them. Together, that’ll be enough to take over both palaces.” She glances around the table. “We execute the monarchs publicly. Then, we’ll need to move quickly to cement Mayah’s rule.”

I brace my arms against the table. “You can’t kill my father.”

Tairna’s expression morphs into pity. “Mayah, we’ve discussed this … if we want you to lead, then—”

I wave an impatient hand. “That’s not what I mean. I want to kill him.” The words taste like blood on my tongue. My heart pounds—not from fear, but from the white-hot clarity of knowing I mean it.

The deaths of the Tundrayni warriors still haunt me—but they had been innocent.

Zev turns sharply toward me. He opens his mouth, then clamps it shut, muscles twitching. Silence stretches, but the rage inside me is deafening. Father’s wrathful face, lit by lightning, is burned behind my eyelids. I hear the echo of every storm he ever summoned to break me—the one he summoned to kill my mother.

Tairna studies me, then slowly nods. “All right. We’ll capture him alive. Rycken, send a missive to the other camps about the movements. Lyzza, work with Tumaas to ensure we are well-armed.”

With the meeting adjourned, everyone rises to leave.

“Wait, Vayru,” Tairna calls. I don’t linger this time, the door handle cool beneath my palm. “Mayah. You stay, too.”

Anxiety churns in my stomach as I trudge back to the table. Zev doesn’t look at me.

Tairna opens a drawer and retrieves a key. Her eyes glisten as she looks at Zev and says, “Give me your hands, Vayru.” Her voice is soft. Tender. The way a mother’s should be.

For a moment, he doesn’t move. Then slowly, he reaches his hands across the table. I hold my breath as Tairna unlocks one cuff, then the other. When both shackles land on the table, Zev takes a deep, shuddering breath, eyes clenching shut as his power flows through him, unburdened. His skin is inflamed where the cuffs sat, and my fingers itch to heal him.

I keep my hands in my lap.

“I thought,” Zev rasps. “I thought that—”

Tairna shoots him a watery smile. “She changed her mind. She told me this morning. As long as you can control your temper, Vayru, they’ll stay off.”

My heart misses a beat. “Sura?” I whisper, eyes wide.

Tairna nods. “She was the staunchest advocate for keeping Vayru suppressed. Which is understandable.” Her eyes cut to Zev in apology. “I didn’t want her to feel unsafe. But she found me this morning and told me she was ready.”

My heart swells with so much affection, I fear it might burst. I don’t deserve Sura and her unconditional friendship. A tear slips down my cheek, and I wipe it away quickly before they see.

When my eyes find Zev, he’s watching me, his expression unreadable. I gesture to his wrists. “I’m glad for you. I’m sure you’ve missed your powers.”

He doesn’t say anything. My stomach plummets. Tides, he’s not going to respond. I almost rise, ready to flee the room when he clears his throat.

“Thanks.”

“Are you sure it’s fine?” Sura asks me for the tenth time as we walk to my room.

“Yes!” I insist for the tenth time, tugging her along. Tumaas asked for privacy tonight—neither of us want to linger on why, or who—and I told Sura she could sleep in my room. I’m there alone anyway.

She runs into my back as I freeze in the doorframe.

Not alone tonight, apparently.

Zev stands in the middle of the room, toweling off his damp hair.

Shirtless.

“Oh, um, I didn’t—we’ll just—”

“I was just dropping Mayah off,” Sura says quickly. She shoves me inside, her hand slapping my back. “Goodnight!”

The door slams shut, leaving me alone with my husband.

My cheeks flush with traitorous warmth.

I try not to look. I really do.

But my faithless eyes find the naked expanse of his torso.

Tides, it isn’t fair that he’s so beautiful.

Tanned skin, cut muscles, that fine smattering of hair—

My breath catches.

The neat row of pale scars carved across his chest.

A vise clamps around my throat, and then I’m blinking rapidly. “I’ll just … I’ll get ready for bed,” I mumble, my voice thick. I duck into the bathroom before he sees my tears.

Minutes later, I emerge in my indecently short nightgown, but Zev’s already extinguished the lanterns. Moonlight filters through the window, casting a faint glow over the room. On the sofa, two long legs dangle over the armrest, crossed neatly at the ankles.

Disappointment wells in my chest. I shove it down and settle beneath the covers. Alone.

I try to sleep—eyes clenched shut, counting until I lose count, then starting over. Still, my ears perk, desperate to catch even a faint sigh, the shifting of pillows. A whispered declaration of love. Something.

But there’s nothing. I may as well have been alone.

Eventually, my counting pays off. My eyelids drift shut naturally, not forcefully, sleep just beginning to embrace me.

Then, I hear it.

The sharp patter of rain on glass. The sudden, rattling boom of thunder. Our room is lit aglow for a heartbeat.

Blood fills my mouth—I bit my tongue.

Deep steadying breaths. You can do this, Mayah.

My panicked, racing heart disagrees.

Mama’s blurry face flashes behind my eyelids. It’s the night the storm took her. My breath catches on a sob I don’t release.

Another loud crack of thunder shakes the room.

My lips part, Zev’s name on my tongue—but my words turn to ice.

My wrist was cramping. I needed you to finish quickly.

His cruel words crash into my mind from the last time I sought—he offered—his comfort. So, I don’t say anything, just burrow deeper beneath the blankets as if that might protect me.

Maybe I’ll faint soon, and he’ll think I’ve fallen asleep.

I don’t.

I’m a pathetic, whimpering mess, teeth piercing my lower lip to cage in the sounds of terror.

My thoughts loop in useless, chaotic whirls—if I had just told him sooner, if I had pushed Daak away harder, if I had followed my heart instead of my plan.

The thunder cracks.

I curl tighter beneath the blanket, trying to shove the guilt down, but it slithers up my throat like suffocating smoke.

Zev’s anguished face.

Daak’s broken body.

My father’s betrayal.

My own.

Lightning flashes, illuminating my trembling hands beneath the blanket. I suck in a mouthful of stagnant air, but it’s not enough. Father’s voice booms in my ears.

You’re pathetic, a sniveling embar—

The mattress dips beside me. Cool air invades my lungs as the covers are gently peeled off my head.

Zev slides into the bed, close, but not touching me. His hand wavers as if he wants to, but he keeps it fisted at his side.

Then the thunder cracks again, and his restraint shatters.

He reaches for me.

I hesitate. I’m not sure I want his comfort if the price is his cruelty.

He stills, hand flexing in the air between us.

Another boom of thunder decides for me.

I scramble across the mattress, sinking against his bare chest, boneless. I let him stroke my hair, rub soothing circles into my back, tangle his legs with mine. My face is wet, silent sobs racking my body, but it’s not because of the storm.

It’s because of him.

Because I love him.

Tides damn me, I love this man.

I will take his cruelty, his disdain. I’ll bathe in his contempt until I’m covered in every drop of his wrath. I’ll embrace his rage, wrap it around myself like a cloak, until it’s the only thing that warms me. I’ll swallow his resentment, bite after seething bite, until it’s the only thing that fuels me. I’ll take anything he gives me, as long as I can be his again.

A gentle finger tilts my face, tears wiped away by the rough pad of his thumb.

“I’m sorry,” he murmurs, his eyes anguished in the dark. “For how I treated you last time.” His throat bobs. “You didn’t deserve that.”

“I’m sorry, too,” I rasp. “For everything. Zev, I—I miss you so much. I miss the way you teased me. Cared for me. Held me. I miss the light in your eyes when you saw me from across a room. Tides, your smile that was just for me.” I’m sobbing now, hands clutching his shoulders. “This was never supposed to happen. I was to marry your brother. I would’ve despised him. Been eager to kill him. I would’ve found the tunnels, smuggled in the poison, killed everyone. I wouldn’t have been left with this gaping hollow inside me where you live now, Zev. You made a home for yourself in my heart, and then I—Tides, fuck.” A deep, shuddering breath. Then, another. “I’m aching for you, Zev.” My voice is a shattered whisper. “Just like you wanted me to be. I need you so bad, I’m drowning.”

Zev doesn’t say a word. Just keeps staring at me, his expression unreadable, his thumb absently tracing a circle on my shoulder.

“Why were you with him, then?” he finally asks. His voice has gone cold. His hand stills.

Fuck.

“He didn’t know my feelings had changed. I tried to stop him, avoid … touching him, but I-I didn’t try hard enough. I couldn’t admit to myself how I felt about you then, let alone to someone else. What you saw—that was my goodbye to him. He just didn’t know it. I swear by the Tides, I was going to tell you everything when you returned.”

He regards me for a moment before a deep, pained sigh escapes him. He scrubs his hand over his face, shifting onto his back.

“Say something,” I plead. “Is there a path forward for us?” I grab his hand and splay it over my heart, hoping he’ll feel his name in its frantic beat.

He doesn’t draw his hand back, and hope breathes air into my lungs. I rise up on my elbow, tracing each white scar across his chest with the tip of my finger.

He lets me. When I rest my cheek over his heart, he lets me do that, too. I’m completely surrounded by him, and for the first time since I woke shackled in his carriage, my soul finds contentment.

My eyes have nearly drifted shut when he speaks.

“I gave you everything I had, Mayah,” he whispers hoarsely. “I have nothing left.”

I swallow thickly. “Then … then why are you here?”

He sighs, turning his face away as if wondering the same thing.

“I can’t seem to stay away.” A muscle ticks in his jaw. “But I can never trust you again. When I close my eyes, I see you with him. In his arms. On your knees, grief and rage swirling in your eyes. For him. When I thought you were mine.” He swallows hard. “I’ll keep being cruel to you. Pulling you close, then pushing you away. Like I did in the tent.” His voice cracks. “You deserve to be happy, Mayah. Just not with me.”

A tear drops onto his chest, then another.

Zev lets me weep against him until I have nothing left inside me. It’s a strange feeling to lose something, even as it's wrapped tightly around you.

CHAPTER SEVENTY-SIX

“MAYAH!” ZEV’S VOICE IS urgent in my ear, his arms locked tight around me. There’s a low, violent rumbling.

The room trembles. The lantern on the dresser crashes to the floor and shatters.

Zev sits up and brings me along with him.

“Earthquake?” I clutch his bicep as another powerful rumble shakes the bed.

“Earthwielder.”

Zev rises smoothly despite the literal vibrating floor and yanks on a shirt before tossing me one to wear over my nightgown. He frantically rummages in the dresser before turning back to me. “Let’s go.”

Hands intertwined, we exit into the hallway. Torches rattle in their holders. Zev bangs on every door we pass. Sura’s door doesn’t open, and I unlace my hand from his and slam my fists against the door.

“Sura!” I shout. “Tumaas!”

The floor shakes violently beneath my bare feet.

“There’s no time,” Zev growls. He reaches for me, but the building rocks again, and I stagger to the floor.

Sura’s door flings open, revealing a wide-eyed and bare-chested Tumaas. Behind him is a tiny woman with disheveled chin-length blonde hair. Mona.

“Where is Sura?” Panic seeps into my voice.

“She said she was with you!”

Tides drown me. Sura was with me—she’d planned to spend the night in my room. Where had she gone after leaving me with Zev?

“We need to go. Now,” Zev bites out. He reaches for me again when—

The building rattles, an earth-shattering crack freezing the blood in my veins. I crash backwards. Tumaas topples onto me, crushing my lungs. Vaguely, Mona’s sharp yelp echoes through the din.

The floor splits open in a jagged chasm as giant roots erupt from the ground like massive snakes.

Wood shudders beneath me as it splinters. I can’t see Zev anymore.

The ghost of my name is on his lips, shouted again and again, growing fainter and fainter, through the rumbling around us.

Wooden beams groan and crack overhead.

Dust shakes from the ceiling.

And people scream.

I don’t hear my name anymore.

“Zev!” I shout. He was on the other side of the crack that rent the floor in half. “Ze—”

We plummet.

My stomach jumps into my throat.

Tides save us.

The building is splitting in two.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit,” Tumaas mutters in my ear. He slings his arm around my waist, the other arm hooked into the doorway. “Mona!” he shouts over his shoulder, but the sound is lost in the destruction.

My arms tighten around Tumaas.

I brace for death.

Time slows. We fall for hours, though it must be only seconds before there’s a loud, bone-rattling boom.

The air rushes from my lungs.

My head rears up and slams back into the crumbling floor.

The building crushes us in a shower of broken stones and cracked beams. Tumaas takes the brunt of it, shielding me with his massive body, though we’re lucky we’re near the door frame.

An eternity passes before the shaking stops. Tumaas staggers to his knees, knocking away debris. “Mona!” he shouts. “MONA!”

It’s dark and suffocating. With my every breath, dust invades my throat, until it feels like I’m breathing through sandpaper.

“…in here…” Mona’s voice is faint, but close.

Tumaas hefts jagged pieces of wood and broken furniture, each movement sending fresh dust floating through the air. He manages to crawl through the chaos around us.

I cast out my powers, searching for moisture, but there’s not enough to summon. Eyes clenched, I try again and again, but it’s fruitless.

Rocks scrape together nearby. It’s pitch black.

“Stand back, Mayah.” Tumaas’s muffled voice calls through the stone. Loud thuds, more scraping, and then he pulls free.

“Come on, love,” he says, climbing through the remains of his room, Mona’s arms slung around his neck. “I’ve got you.”

“Are you hurt?” I rasp, coughing through the dust coating my throat as I crawl closer. My knees and palms are shredded.

“I think my leg is broken.” Her voice is steady. A good sign.

My hands glow, the light glinting off the faint sheen of sweat coating Mona’s forehead. I set my palms to her leg, and swiftly heal the break.

“Better?”

She nods, breathless. “You’re awfully handy in a crisis, Mayah.”

I don’t respond. My stomach is twisted in knots.

“Did you see anyone else?” I ask Tumaas.

“No. I’m sorry,” is his soft reply.

My heart twists in my chest. No, no, no.

“Zev!” I shout into the crumbling darkness.

There’s no answer.

“ZEV!” Again and again, I call out his name.

“Enough, Mayah,” Tumaas says, his voice hoarse from the dust that’s likely invaded his lungs. “He might already be digging his way out. We need to do the same.”

I repeat his words in my mind, holding onto them like a promise as Tumaas digs out a path through broken stone.

I lose sense of how long it takes. Just a mindless loop of climbing, hefting, shoving. My hands are scraped raw, knees aching and bloody, every step sending pain lancing up my calves. When we stop at brief intervals to rest, I alternate healing myself, Mona, and Tumaas, but not extensively. I need to save my reserves—we don’t know what awaits us at the surface.

We finally emerge, atop a mountain of rubble, the camp sprawled below.

Or what remains of it.

It’s pure, utter chaos. We’re under attack.

Buildings leveled, screaming people, thick coils of smoke.

Roots clawing through the ground, electricity crackling in the air.

The stench of burned bodies.

The sky tears open. Rain pelts my face, turns pink as it mixes with the blood weeping from my open cuts.

I swivel my head, searching every horizon.

Thunder rumbles across the sky, but for once, I ignore it.

“Zev!” I shout, cupping my hands around my mouth. “ZEV!”

Tides, is he still under the rubble?

I don’t see him anywhere. Tides damn me, I don’t see him.

“We need to find Zev.” I don’t recognize my voice.

Tumaas’s face is grim as he exchanges a brief glance with Mona. “We need to find Sura,” he says gently. “And we need to defend the camp. He’ll make it out, Mayah. Maybe he already has. Please.”

I don’t have time to cry. I don’t have time to hope. Tides, he’s right. Zev is a strong, capable wielder. He doesn’t need me to save him.

Focus. Focus, Mayah.

Sura needs you. These people need you.

Tumaas and Mona climb down the mountain of stone. I spare one more glance around me, waiting for Zev’s hand to push through the stone.

“Mayah!” Tumaas shouts from below, and I startle. With a deep breath, I follow them.

“I need food,” I say at the bottom. My hands and feet are scraped raw, but I don’t waste my reserves.

“The armory is closer. We’ll hit that first. Then the kitchens, yeah?”

I nod. Mud squelches beneath our bare feet as we dart through the rain. Everywhere around us, people are running, taking cover, helping dig out leveled buildings. We turn a corner—an earthwielder stands wedged between two buildings, summoning thick roots through the splintering stone.

I don’t think. Just react.

Around me, everything blurs. But my arms are steady.

My hands rise into the air. Raindrops converge into a glistening spear, then freeze into lethal ice. With a wave of my hand, it plunges into his heart. A sickening squelch. He falls to the ground.

We keep going.

Lightning flashes across the sky. Tumaas’s gaze flicks to me, but for once I’m not afraid—I’m desperate.

Every boom of thunder, every bolt of lightning, gives me hope that maybe Zev is alive. Maybe that it’s his wrath raining down around us.

That, maybe, he’s searching for me, too.

Mayhem reigns at the armory.

Rebels scramble to grab weapons, shields, anything that might give them an advantage in battle. But the attackers seem to have deduced the armory is a prime spot to find converged rebels.

Through the sluicing rain, my eyes narrow on the glinting chestplate of one of the attackers—a tree with a lightning bolt cut through it.

Tides. The attackers are Arbinji soldiers.

They form a line, launching a concerted attack. Earthwielders tear mounds of dirt from the ground, catapulting it toward our heads. There’s one stormwielder among them. He raises both hands. A flash of lightning shoots down, incinerating two rebels toward the front of the throng.

I cage my yelp inside my chest and join the fighters while Tumaas and Mona rush into the armory. Another boom of thunder rumbles through the night air. My eyes alight on the stormwielder. I focus on the rainwater clinging to his body, coaxing it into his nostrils.

Into his lungs.

Hacking coughs erupt from his chest as he tries to expel the water, but it’s useless. I hold it inside him, pooling it until his airways are submerged.

His knees buckle.

The light dies from his eyes.

Around him, his companions drop dead, roots piercing abdomens, arrows lodged into chests.

But there are still too many.

I block their attacks again and again, sweat and rain running down my forehead. One of the soldiers raises a hand—roots erupt from the earth, coiling around my legs. He hauls his hand back, face drawn tight with focus, and—

–an arrow lodges into his throat.

I whirl as best I can with the thick roots entrapping my legs, shoving away the memory of the last time an earthwielder held me captive.

Tumaas stands behind me, three swords in his grasp. It’s Mona that holds the crossbow. I dip my chin in thanks, accepting a sword from Tumaas, quickly slicing through the roots.

Together, we fight.

Men and women fall to the ground.

Screams grow louder.

My shoulder brushes against the earthwielder beside me.

Rain and blood soak the ground.

And then, in the distance, I see him bolting toward me.