Текст книги "Heat for sale"

Автор книги: Ursa Dox

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Текущая страница: 11 (всего у книги 12 страниц)

Adrien hissed and knocked it away. “Don’t touch me again unless you want me to fight you.”

“You wouldn’t win, little one.”

“I don’t care. I’d leave marks.” He felt scarred inside and out already.

Heath nodded, his eyes downcast and full of shame. “Will you ever forgive me?”

“I don’t know right now.” Adrien’s fingers clenched the edges of the photo album.

“Do you want me to go?”

Adrien hesitated. Part of him wanted to be alone to look at the pictures, to see his omega parent for the first time. But another part of him wanted to know more. Wanted to understand the pictures, to understand why Nathan was smiling or laughing, to know where he was and what he was doing when each shot was taken.

“No,” he said. “Stay.”

Heath sat very still and didn’t argue.

Adrien opened the book.

The first picture was in color. He didn’t know why he’d expected it to be in black and white like the pictures in Heath’s baby album, but he had.

Instead, he was greeted by a sharp smile, laughing eyes, and a face remarkably like his own. But more somehow. Like Adrien was just an echo of a complicated but stunning song.

Nathan was handsome. No, dashing.

He turned the pages slowly, questions heavy on this tongue. Too heavy to actually speak them.

Every picture revealed a confidence that Adrien had always lacked.

Nathan’s casual, languid poses, his mischievous gaze, and a certainty in his expression that whoever was behind the camera—Heath, it had to be—was absolutely besotted with him. And yet there was an edge of cruelty in the set of Nathan’s mouth and the slant of his stare. Like he knew he could hurt Heath and get away with it. Like he knew that he could and he had.

No, he did.

Adrien’s hand trembled as he turned another page and another.

Fashionable clothes. Fancy yachts. Mountain lodges. Tuxedos. Photos with Heath. Photos alone. Photos of Nathan nude. Photos of him posed. Casual photos and professional ones, too.

Pages of pictures of a man Adrien could never know, or love, or understand. A man Heath had loved before Adrien—did he even love him?

Or was he just a piece of Nathan that Heath had managed to scavenge? Like Lidell and Ned had implied?

“Why did you love him?” Adrien finally asked, lingering on a photo of Nathan with his head tossed back, laughter creasing his handsome face, and a glass of champagne held loosely in his hand. He was standing by another alpha, a tall, dark man with wide hands, who had them all over Nathan’s hips.

Adrien wondered how Heath had felt about that then. How he felt about it now.

“He was an asshole,” Heath said sadly. “A beautiful, cruel asshole.”

“That’s the kind of man you love?”

“No. I love you, and you’re kind, gentle, trusting. Nathan was never trusting.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t have been either,” Adrien spit out, shooting Heath a dark glare.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you. When I—”

“I don’t want your excuses again. I want the truth. Why did you love him?”

“Because he was—” Heath waved at the album. “I was bewitched.”

“And when you bought my heat, it was to have a piece of him?”

“Yes.”

“And when you fucked me in the heat cabin, you wanted to knock me up because I was Nathan’s son.”

Heath swallowed, a confused expression flitting over his face. “At first.”

“When I came here, did you want me here because I was Nathan’s son or

–”

“No! That’s not why I wanted you here.”

“Why not?”

“At the cabin. That’s when it changed for me.”

“While we were fucking,” Adrien said acidly.

“Yes. No. Just there. In the cabin with you.”

He’d never heard Heath sound so lost. “So why didn’t you tell me then?”

“What was I supposed to say? You were scared and needed me to guide you. Was I supposed to tell you while you were out of your mind in heat, ‘By the way, I fucked your omega parent years ago, but now he’s dead, and I’m hoping you can bring part of him back to me’?”

Adrien’s throat tightened. He couldn’t breathe. He bent his head over the photo album, the scent of the old pages filling his nostrils, and he choked on it as a tear splattered next to the picture of Nathan laughing.

“He wasn’t kind,” Heath said. “He was unfaithful and drove me mad. He was like a drug to me.”

“Like you’ve been a drug to me.”

“I hope not. You’ve made me feel complete. He made me nuts,” Heath said. “Our lovemaking was violent and consuming. But while you were pregnant, what we shared kept you calm, brought you joy. It’s not the same.”

“So with him, my omega parent– Nathan.” Oh, how that name tasted bitter in his mouth; thank God Heath hadn’t agreed to it for Michael. “With him, it was the thrill of the chase.”

Heath rubbed at his forehead. “Nathan would give himself to me completely. I’d feel high, wild with joy. Then he’d pull away from me. Say he needed time alone. Go off with another alpha. I’d go insane.” Heath squeezed his eyes shut. “Then he’d come back to me. I’d be angry at first, but

he’d flash his smile. He’d take off his clothes. Promise to make a child with me during his next heat.” Heath swallowed thickly. “It’s shameful how I let him treat me.”

“But you loved it.”

Heath shook his head. “It was an obsession. I see that now.”

“And I’m part of that obsession. Michael and me.”

“No! You and Michael are the best things I’ve ever done.”

“We’re just a new obsession. Thanks to Nathan.” He wished the name didn’t burn to say, but every time it came out of his mouth, it hurt.

“Yes,” Heath said, taking the photo album out of Adrien’s hands and slamming it shut. “Thanks to Nathan.”

Adrien stared in shock as Heath stood up and paced in front of him, ripping at his hair as he spoke in rapid, angry tones, but clearly meaning every word like fire means to burn.

“It’s true! If not for Nathan, we wouldn’t be here right now. Michael wouldn’t be here now.” Heath stopped in front of him, glaring down, but his anger hurt more than it intimidated. “If not for Nathan, I wouldn’t know what it is to hope for a normal, happy future with a kind man who loves me, or to finally have my feelings for a man returned. I wouldn’t know the joy of being a father. Of being your lover and alpha. Of wanting a life with you. I wouldn’t have you at all!”

“Because you wouldn’t have bid on me.”

“Because he gave birth to you!” Heath roared.

Adrien blinked at him.

“He gave birth to you. And, yes, maybe he walked away and left you with your father—who raised you to be the kind of man that Nathan would never have raised you to be. He’d have done the same thing to you that he did to me. You got a clean break from him. That was his gift to you. He didn’t torture you for years with promises of love and then yank it away. He let you stay with a man who adored you. So your father was too religious and kept you more innocent than he should have, but he loved you. He had kind eyes.

That’s what Nathan always said about why he left you with him. ‘He had kind eyes.’ ”

Adrien’s chin trembled. His heart ached, and he covered his face with his hands.

“So go on and blame him if you want. Blame me. Be angry. But none of

what we had—have, could still have—would exist without Nathan. I don’t love him anymore. Not just because he’s dead. But because he was a cruel man, and he treated me terribly. I understand that now. But I am grateful to him, because he made you, and then I found you, and now we have Michael.”

He stopped a moment. “And, Adrien, I love you. Our life could be beautiful.

Please—” Heath’s voice was gruff. “Try to forgive me.”

“I want to,” Adrien whispered. “I want to forgive you. I’ll try. But…”

“But?”

The big clock in the nest ticked as Adrien’s mind raced. Finally, he said,

“I need to try somewhere else. I can’t stay here. In this nest.” He looked around the room and it felt exactly like what Heath had denied it was: a comfortable prison.

“So you’re going to leave me, too?”

Adrien squeezed his eyes shut. “Maybe. I am Nathan’s son after all.” He stood, hauling the bag he’d packed while they’d waited for Simon to take Michael over his shoulder. He’d known even then, deep down, what he was going to do. “I’ll contact you when Michael and I are settled in. We can arrange for you to visit.”

“Where are you taking him?”

“I’ll call you when I get there.”

Adrien walked toward the door leading to the rest of the castle. Some part of him expected Heath to tackle him, to force him to stay, but he pulled the door open without any effort at all. As he did, he heard Heath roar with pain in the living room. It made his knees weak, but he forced himself forward.

Simon stood outside with Michael in his arms and his cheeks wet with tears.

“You can come visit, too,” Adrien said, taking the baby from him. “We’ll miss you.”

Simon said nothing at all, hiccupping sobs slipping out of his throat.

It wasn’t until he’d led Adrien down the winding halls and up the stairs, and then out into the sunlight in front of the massive house that he finally spoke.

“You said nothing could change the way you feel,” Simon rasped. “And I said I’d remind you of that.”

Adrien hugged Simon, kissed his soft, wet cheek, and whispered, “I love him. That hasn’t changed. But trust… That’s another matter.”

He climbed into his car that someone had pulled around and left running.

There was a baby seat in the back for Michael, and he strapped him in. He looked so small in it, so helpless and tiny. Adrien’s heart broke.

He headed down the drive toward the giant gate, his throat tight with screams he couldn’t seem to let out.

The fairy tale was over.

Chapter Twenty-Two

“I DON’T NEED to hear that you told me so.”

Heath sat in the gazebo, the empty nest behind him, and plucked the petals from a rose. It had been three days since Adrien left and there had been no word at all. He was trying not to panic, but with every passing minute he imagined all sorts of terrible scenarios. He hadn’t slept for more than a few minutes, and he missed them both like his peace depended on them being back in arm’s reach.

Simon took the bench across from him and remained silent.

“I should have told him from the start.”

Simon shrugged, his jowls shaking with the movement. “You didn’t intend to fall for him. How could you have known he’d be so different from Nathan?”

“I was selfish. I didn’t see him as his own person until it was too late.”

Heath plucked the last petal and let it fall. Then turned and snapped off another late bloomer and began to pick it apart, too. “I should have known when the heat crush was so strong.”

“And if you had told him then? In the middle of his heat?”

Heath shook his head. “It would have been unfair to him. Forced a choice when he didn’t have any. I should have told him before so that he could back out, sell to another alpha.”

“I’m not the person you need to be saying all this to, lovey.”

Heath groaned. “I hurt him. He trusted me.”

“Should have, would have, could have,” Simon said, and tutted. “What’s done is done, as you were telling Lidell. Now what are you going to do about it?”

“I wish I knew.”

“Moping here isn’t going to get your son and lover back.”

“I’m not moping,” Heath growled.

“What are you doing then? Ignoring the ugly truth again? You screwed up, lovey, and you’re going to have to make it right. No amount of sulking

and wringing your hands is going to do that. So figure out a plan and enact it.

You’re Heath Clearwater, heir to the Clearwater estate, and you’re in love with a boy who’s out of his depth. Go get him.”

“What if he doesn’t want me to? I’ve already hurt him enough.”

“Heath, for God’s sake, he has your son.”

“Michael will be safe with him.”

“Will he? Adrien is young and has no family, nowhere to go. He’s angry with you, and is afraid he can’t trust you. He’s still in post-partum drop, and he’s alone. He needs his alpha.” Simon leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees. “And you need him, too. The bond you were building together was a beautiful one. Go claim it.”

Heath squeezed the half-destroyed rose in his hand. “I lied to him.”

“You didn’t lie, you withheld.”

Heath huffed. “Are you really going to argue semantics as an excuse, old man? You never let me get away with that as a child.”

Simon was silent for a long time then, and Heath thought maybe he was going to stop trying to cajole Heath into action. But alas.

“I remember when Nathan died,” Simon said, twisting his hands together in his lap. “After all you’d been through with him, you still grieved him hard.

I remember more than one night when you lamented that he had never fully trusted you.”

“He didn’t.”

“Oh, but he did,” Simon corrected. “He trusted that you’d always be there for him, no matter what he did, and you were.” He shrugged his shoulders and rolled his eyes. “He used you that way, of course, but, Heath, he trusted you completely. He simply wasn’t trustworthy himself, as evidenced by his broken promises and inability to be honest with you. You’re the one who never trusted enough.”

Heath snorted. “Excuse me?”

“You never trusted in Nathan’s love.”

“How could I when he ran around doing whatever he wanted and—”

“Because he always came home to you. Don’t get me wrong. Nathan wasn’t a good omega for you, but not because he didn’t trust you or love you, but because he put you on your knees. He was the one in command. He didn’t love you the way you need to be loved—adoringly, unquestioningly, and submissively. The way Adrien does.”

Heath ground his teeth, not wanting to hear another word, but pinned in place by the truth. “Did.”

Simon ignored his interjection and went on. “You were so afraid that Adrien would be like Nathan that you didn’t trust him either. And in his way, he was like his omega parent. From the start, Adrien put his trust in you, like Nathan did. He grew to love you, like Nathan did. But unlike his omega parent, he’d have committed to you, Heath.”

“I know what I’ve lost.”

“You’re so self-righteous at times, playing the martyr. Oh, brave, honorable Heath, all the other peers say. Helping his horrible brother, supporting his bratty nephew, and putting up with such an unloyal lover.”

Simon tutted again. “But you’re just as much to blame as Lidell, Ned, and Nathan. You take on the savior role like you don’t trust that your brother or nephew can handle themselves. You endured Nathan’s behavior like you didn’t trust in the flow of life to provide you with love. Even now you doubt it, though life has given you love. Twice.” Simon spoke firmly. “You always say that Nathan had trust issues, but you’re the one with trust issues, Heath.”

Heath stared at the man who’d raised him, who’d seen him through it all, good and bad. “What do I do? How do I fix myself? And this?”

“Adrien needs a strong hand.”

“Yes.”

“In that very important way, he isn’t like Nathan. Think of his life, lovey: under his father’s command, then under his professor’s command at university. He says he wants to be a professor himself, but a research professor, a quiet man digging into his particular passions behind the scenes.

Adrien complied without question with the matcher at the university. That information was on his auction page. Yes, I looked. Can you ever imagine Nathan doing that?”

Simon crossed the gazebo and sat down on the bench next to Heath, putting his wrinkled hand on Heath’s knee. “Adrien’s good for you in all the ways Nathan never was, because he doesn’t put you on your knees. He lets you stand tall and be an alpha. His style of submissive love allows you to feel precious and honored. Those are feelings Nathan never gave you. Every alpha has a weakness, and every omega should know what it is before marrying or making a lifelong commitment. Lack of trust is yours. Adrien knows that now.”

“I wish I knew how to shut down my damned heart.”

“No, that heart is your greatest gift.” Simon squeezed his knee and spoke with great gentleness. “Heath, lovey, he’s worth the risk. Adrien isn’t running from you because he doesn’t care for you, or because he has such a great need for freedom. He’s running from you because he didn’t know how to stay. Go get him.”

“I don’t know where he is.”

“You do.” Simon stood up and stretched. “In your heart, you do. I’m going home to Earl. I’m sure it’ll be another night of tales about poor slighted Ned’s pity party orgies he’s been throwing for the last few days. You Clearwater men, always making things so dramatic.”

“I don’t know where he’s gone,” Heath repeated, forlorn, tossing the petals of the destroyed rose to the ground with the others. “You act like I know him, but I don’t. We were together for four months and I don’t know him at all.”

“You’re being absurd. I’ve watched you give him what he needed instinctively the entire time he was here.”

“That was sex and hormones, and alpha instincts in reaction to his heat and pregnancy.”

Simon put his hands in his pockets. “You know he takes joy in the small things in life: his robe, the tunnel, the garden. He craves comfort, and not just because of the pregnancy. Think of what he said about growing up on the farm: constricted, yes, but he loved the familiarity of it. Think of what he’s always studied: fabric, traditional weaving. The comforts of the artistic world.”

Heath closed his eyes, imagined Adrien leaving the house, alone and scared with Michael. “He went back to school.”

“Of course he did.” Simon smiled, his chin wobbling. “You ridiculous fool. Go get him.”

With that, Simon walked down the garden path back toward the nest, leaving Heath staring at the litter of petals on the ground, his mind already trying to piece together the right words to say.

“I’M JUST LIKE my omega parent,” Adrien said miserably, staring at the pint of

hard cider in his hand and wondering if it would be safe to chestfeed Michael if he drank it. He sat at the desk in his dorm room, while Lance sprawled on Adrien’s unmade bed.

Lance nudged his fingers. “Drink up. It’ll do you some good.”

“I don’t think I should. Michael…” Adrien straightened his glasses and then gazed at his son, sleeping in a makeshift baby bed made from a cardboard box with a blanket in it on the floor of his dorm room. Heath would be appalled. And maybe he should be.

Adrien gave the pint to Lance. “You drink it.”

“Your loss, friend.” Lance swallowed down the rest of his own pint and then started on Adrien’s. “I’d say you look good except you look fucking miserable.”

“I am.”

“Good God, why are you here? You should be with your man. Once this little guy is a bit bigger, that’s when you come back, for like, day classes, and you take a few extra years to finish up your work.”

“I used to care a lot more about my career. I did all this so I could have the funds for the government to agree to name me a professor.”

“Babies change things. And you can still be a professor. Your alpha will have plenty of cash to make sure that happens.”

“I won’t use him like that.”

Lance used the empty pint to point at Michael in the cardboard box.

“Obviously.”

Adrien wiped a hand over his face. “I’m a terrible omega parent.”

“No, you’re not. You’re just dropping from that glorious pregnancy hormone high and crashing hard.” Lance shrugged. “I’ve seen it all before with my step-omega parents.”

“This is different.”

“How so?”

Adrien didn’t know if he had the strength to go into it. He hadn’t had a good meal since he found out about Nathan, feeling too sick and hurt at first, and now, spoiled by Simon’s cooking, he found the cafeteria food disgusting.

Michael still ate a lot, though, and Adrien needed to be careful. Not eating enough while chestfeeding could be dangerous for them both.

“I took him away from his father.”

“You can take him back.”

“No!”

“I don’t mean leave Michael there with him,” Lance said gently. “I mean you can go back to your alpha. I know he’d want you.” He frowned. “Doesn’t he? Or…?”

“He would take us back.”

“Then go! This is ridiculous.” He pointed at the cardboard box again.

“Whatever he did, forgive him and take this baby to a real bed. He’s too rich to sleep in a box.”

“He’s the heir, but I didn’t take any money when I left.”

“Your auction money—”

“In escrow at the bank until I finish out one year of chestfeeding.”

“You are insane. That man could buy and sell this university, and you didn’t take anything?”

Adrien shook his head.

Michael squirmed in his cardboard bed and farted.

Lance wrinkled up his nose. “Damn, he’s so small. Who knew?” He ran a hand over his fuzzy, dark hair. “I don’t know why you’re so upset, but I promise unless he’s hurting you—holy shit, is he hurting you?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure.” Adrien groaned. “It turns out…” He studied Lance carefully. “Listen, this is private. I don’t want you talking about this with anyone. Heath doesn’t need the rumors.”

“If you’re talking about you being his dead lover’s son, then that rumor’s done flown, friend.”

“What?”

“Yes, everyone knows that. His ex-heir is none too pleased with having been ousted, and he’s going around mouthing off about it like there’s something illegal about knocking up your dead lover’s son. Which there’s not. They were never married.”

“So everyone here knows?” He thought about the odd looks he’d gotten in the hallway earlier after he’d made his way down to the cafeteria for dinner to push food around on a plate. He’d thought at the time it was because he had Michael with him, but the exact nuance of those looks made so much more sense if they were all aware of the details of his situation.

“No one cares.”

“They were all staring at me tonight.”

“Because you maxed out the auction, got knocked up by one of the wealthiest men in the nation, disappeared for the duration, and showed back up with the prettiest damn baby they’ve ever seen who is sleeping in a fucking cardboard box!”

Adrien snorted. “Well, when you put it that way…”

“Yeah. Adrien, you have to go back to your alpha.”

Adrien took his glasses off to rub at his eyes. “What about that Bluebeard story you told me?”

Lance choked on a laugh. “Does he have a secret room you can’t look in?

Did you uncover a bunch of skeletons of dead omegas?”

Adrien snorted. “Just the one.” Lance hooted and then collapsed against the mattress laughing. “It’s not funny.”

“It’s hilarious, friend!”

“How? He was in love with my omega parent. Was with him for years!

Never told me about it! He says Nathan was cruel and unkind and…I don’t even know how Nathan died! What if Heath killed him?”

“Do you really think he killed the man he loved?”

“Crimes of passion are real, Lance. Bluebeard—”

“Forget I told you that damn story. You’re not living in some creepy old fairy tale, all right?” He sat up, entirely sober now. “Nathan died of a heart flaw.”

Adrien replaced his glasses, sighing as Lance came into focus again.

“How do you know?”

“The nephew is blabbing all the details of everything to everyone. We all know he died from a heart problem.”

“My omega parent was a terrible person,” Adrien murmured, his glasses slipping down his nose, and tears welling in his eyes.

“Ah, no, friend. From what you’ve said and what I’ve learned, Nathan was a heartbreaker and a rebellious omega, but so what? That doesn’t mean he was a terrible person. He didn’t follow the rules of society or our culture or your father’s faith. But that doesn’t mean he wasn’t lovable. Your alpha loved him enough to want to breed with you for a piece of the man he’d cared for, a legacy of him.”

“What if that’s all I am to him?”

“You’re the omega parent of his child. You’re a loving, generous man.”

Lance frowned. “You’re stuck in your head, babe, and you need to get out of it.”

“But he loved Nathan. He was so dashing. I can’t explain it. I just know I can’t compare.”

“Everything I hear about Nathan reminds me of my own omega parent, the one who left to go travel and never married my dad? All my dad’s other omegas say he was selfish, but I think he just wanted to be free. It sounds to me that Heath wanted a more traditional relationship, and Nathan didn’t. But they loved each other in their own way.” Lance pointed his still half-full pint at Adrien. “But Heath could have a traditional relationship with you. You’ve never been one to push the envelope or want to go on great adventures. You might never have left the farm if your father hadn’t died, for fear of breaking his heart.”

“I’d have left the farm,” Adrien said. “I’m not as boring as all that.”

“I didn’t say you were boring. I’m saying you’re a simple man.”

Adrien closed his eyes, remembering the joy he took in the garden, in the way the light moved down the tunnel of the nest, and he nodded. He didn’t want all of this angst and hurtful suspicion. He wanted his peace back.

“Have you called him?”

He shrugged. “I let his old nurse Simon know we were safe.”

“So Heath Clearwater knows where you are?”

Adrien sighed. “No. I thought he might try to come get us. I said we’d arrange a visit soon.”

“He’s got to be out of his mind worried about you both.” Lance sipped from his bottle and then went on, the tart scent of apple drifting to Adrien on his breath. “Alphas get that way. He’s got his own parental instincts, too, you know. He needs his baby near him. And his omega. He’s probably going gray from the anxiety.”

Adrien’s gut wrenched imagining Heath in pain. “Thanks for supporting me in my difficult-as-hell situation, Lance,” Adrien barked, shoving that softness down. “Glad to know you think this is all so fucking easy, and this is all in my crazy, messed up head.”

“Whoa.” Lance put his hands up. “Calm down. It’s gonna be okay.”

Michael farted again and started to fuss. Adrien picked him up and checked his diaper. His little bottom was a bit red, but he was still clean. He decided to change him anyway and moved over to the changing area he’d set

up. He had hand sanitizer, but he wished there was a sink in the room.

Lance clucked his tongue.

“You think I’ve made a mistake?”

“I think you are letting that baby sleep in a cardboard box.”

“You’re not going to let that go, are you?”

“Look. You can’t stay here. This place isn’t for babies, and it isn’t for you. If you won’t go back to him, then come home with me. My new apartment has a guest room with a bathroom attached. And a kitchen. And I’ll borrow a crib from my parents’ house. No one’s pregnant right now, thank God.”

“Wait, so when you say omega step-parents, you mean you have more than one right now?”

“Polyamory. Look it up.”

As Adrien changed Michael’s diaper, he made up his mind.

Lance was right. He needed to go back to Heath, work things out. Not only because he loved Heath and the dream of the future he’d nursed while pregnant in the nest, but also for Michael’s sake. A baby deserved both of his parents, and his father’s mistake made out of confusion and misguided love shouldn’t prevent him from having that. Trust would need to be earned again, but that was still possible. There would be time.

Michael was all greased up below and in a new diaper when a mighty thump fell on the door. Both of them jumped. Lance’s eyes went wide. “Holy shit,” he gasped, looking around like he wanted to find a place to hide the pints. “You didn’t think he’d come looking for you here? It’s not like he didn’t know where you used to live.”

Another thump, and then Heath’s voice. “I just need to see Michael.”

Then another loud thump. “Please, Adrien. I know you’re in there. I can hear you.”

Adrien grabbed Michael to his chest, opened the door, and found Heath looking haggard as hell. His beard was wild and his eyes bright. He took in the sight of Adrien and sagged in relief against the door. “And Michael?” he asked.

“Right here,” Adrien said, indicating the baby in his arms.

Heath reached out and touched the baby’s cheek. Then he nodded. “Okay.

All right. Can I talk to you or should I go?”

“Stay,” Adrien said before he’d fully made up his mind that was even

what he wanted. “Come in. See Michael.”

A small crowd had gathered in the hallway. The resident assistant called out, “Everything okay, Adrien?”

“We’re fine.”

The RA gave a thumbs-up. “Just shout if you need help.”

“We’re okay.”

Lance was standing with both pints behind his back, like Heath was their father and they were drinking underage. “I’m gonna just—” He nodded at the door. “You cool?”

“I’m cool.” Adrien was surprised it was true. Somehow just seeing Heath, all rumpled and exhausted, soothed him. Made him feel strong enough to handle this.

Lance cleared his throat but nodded. “Okay. Remember what I said about that baby.”

“He’s too pretty for the box. I know.”

Lance slinked around Heath like he was afraid Heath might throw a punch, and maybe that would have been a risk if Heath didn’t look like he’d gone a few rounds with himself already and had no strength to do anything but stare with wide, miserable, hungry eyes at Adrien and the baby.

“Can I hold him?” Heath asked, reaching out for Michael as soon as the door was shut behind Lance.

Adrien passed him over, his heart aching in all kinds of ways as Heath pressed kisses to the top of the baby’s head and his fat cheeks. “He’s okay, see?”

Heath breathed the baby in, and then he turned to Adrien. “And you? Are you okay?”

Adrien huffed. “No. I miss you. I haven’t even gone to class or my office in the art department because I don’t know what to do with Michael, and I don’t know what I’m even doing here.”

“And I don’t know what I’m doing without you. Adrien, I made a terrible mistake. I’m so sorry.”

“I forgive you.”

Heath took a sharp breath. “Excuse me?”

“You said you made a terrible mistake and apologized. I forgive you.”

“Just like that?”

“No, there’s more I’ll need from you over time, but, Heath…” Adrien

took off his glasses, rubbed at his eyes, and put them back on again. “I see you clearly now. You chose me at the auction, and this time I choose you.”

Heath stared at him. “Why?”

Adrien bit into his lower lip and stepped closer, his hands itching to touch. He let them rest on Heath’s hips. “You loved Nathan so much you bought me to try to have a piece of him back. If you love me even half as much—”

“More. I love you more.”

Adrien shook his head. “No, you don’t. Not yet. And that’s okay. You will love me more. Because I’m going to be everything Nathan wasn’t. I’m going to be the man who you come home to, the man who raises your children, and the man who holds your hand in old age. I’m going to have you in every mood, every season. I will get to have every minute he gave up while he was out on his adventures, being ‘free.’ And you’re going to prove that we were right to trust you, my omega parent and me.”