Текст книги "Deceiving Lies"
Автор книги: Molly McAdams
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Текущая страница: 16 (всего у книги 17 страниц)
A confused look crossed her face when I grabbed the hand she was using on herself and moved it away. “This is my job, sweetheart.”
“Okay, but I wasn’t done with you,” she argued and started to reach for me again, but I stopped her hands.
I quickly took off the suit-vest and shirt, and threw them across the room as I kicked off my shoes and stepped out of my pants. “Rachel,” I said and laid her down on the bed before crawling on top of her. “I know you weren’t, and Christ, that was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen you do,” I told her and pulled her toward the center of the bed. “But the first time we get off as a married couple, isn’t about to be in your mouth, and you’re sure as shit not about to do it yourself.”
She opened her mouth to respond, but I thrust inside of her, and all that came out was a throaty mix of pleasure and pain. I rocked against her faster and harder, and my head dropped to the crook of her neck, a low growl emanating from my chest when her nails dug into my back. I’d always loved the noises she made whenever we were together, but the sounds she was making now had me gripping the comforter and pushing into her harder as she began tightening around me. I clenched my teeth as I held off my own orgasm, but the second her body began trembling around me, I let go with a roar I’d tried to suppress by biting down on her shoulder.
We were both breathing hard as I slowed my movements inside her, and after I pulled out, I collapsed onto my back, pulling her onto my chest. Neither of us said anything as we lay there. I don’t know what it’d been, if it was the fact that Rachel was finally mine, if it was the erotic noises she’d been making, or if it was something more . . . but that had been the most intense sexual experience we’d ever had. And all I could do, now that it was over, was lie there and hold her close to me.
“I have something to give you,” she said, breaking the silence sometime later.
Tilting her head back, I kissed her lips softly and pulled back to look in her eyes. “What else could you give me? You’ve given me you, I don’t need anything else.”
She smiled and her blue eyes glossed with tears. The look on her face and in her eyes contradicted her next words. “You’re such a cheesy nerd.”
“Then why are you about to cry?” I sat up on the bed and pulled her with me. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” she assured me and fanned at her eyes. “I’m just being ridiculous again. I’m happy . . . happy we’re here, happy we’re married, happy that . . . I’m just happy.”
I laughed softly, but unease still gripped at my chest when a lone tear slipped down her cheek. “Rachel . . .”
“No, really, I’m fine.” She laughed and wiped at her cheek. “God, I feel stupid. But I really do have something for you. Will you wait here?”
My eyebrows pulled together as I studied her face. “Depends on where you’re going.”
“I’m just going into the bathroom, I’ll be right back, I swear.” She grabbed my face in both her hands and kissed me soundly before pulling away from me and hopping off the bed.
I watched as she grabbed a large purse that had already been in the room and ran into the bathroom. It felt wrong to sit here and not go after her. I had no idea why she’d started to cry. Had I hurt her?
When a couple minutes had passed, and she hadn’t come back into the room, I slid off the bed and walked to where I’d left my clothes. Grabbing my boxer briefs, I pulled them on, and was about to head to the bathroom when the door opened and she walked out. She had on a pair of lacy black underwear, and a matching bra, but I couldn’t focus on her body for long.
She was worrying her bottom lip and had her hands behind her as she took slow steps toward me.
“Rachel?”
“I told you to wait there.”
I looked back at the bed, then back to her. “I was worried about you. We get married and have mind-blowing sex, and then you start to cry and lock yourself in the bathroom.”
With a deadpan expression, she shook her head. “You’re making it out like I was really upset. I told you I was fine, I was just being ridiculous.”
“Rach—”
“Now sit back down on the bed.” When I didn’t move, she widened her eyes at me. “Sit, or I’m not giving this to you.”
“Fine, I’m sitting.”
She took a deep breath in, and her eyes began watering again as the most beautiful smile crossed her face.
And I was so damn lost.
“This is my wedding present to you,” she said and handed me a thick, black envelope.
I took it from her hand, and kept my eyes on her face as long as I could before finally glancing down at the card. What the hell? There were stickers of Thing 1 and Thing 2 from The Cat in the Hat on the front of the envelope. I turned it around to open it, and read the words in silver lettering: “Will be here March 2015.”
What . . . is this supposed to be like Disney on Ice? Is there a Dr. Seuss on Ice now too? Did she get us tickets or something? That’s just . . . odd. Keep smiling. Keep smiling. I so wasn’t smiling. I was confused as hell. I flicked a glance at her, and the beautifully heartbreaking expression she still wore made me even more confused as I opened the envelope and pulled out the small stack of pictures, and pieces of paper.
The first was a piece of paper that said: “I hope you still want this . . .” I slid it to the bottom of the pile and my heart skipped a beat before taking off when I saw the picture of Rachel holding my cousin’s little baby, Shea.
My body felt hot and cold at the same time as I breathed deeply in and out while I sat there, staring at the picture. From the look of Shea’s outfit, this had been taken on the Fourth of July, before I’d gotten there. Rachel looked beautiful holding her. She always looked beautiful, but I loved seeing her with Shea. And right now, I was doing everything to force myself not to think of this becoming my reality. This could be about to go in a different direction, and I’m just jumping to the conclusion I’ve been wanting.
With a shaky hand, I put the picture on the bottom of the pile, quickly followed by the paper that said: “. . . because this is happening.”
The next picture was of Rachel’s upper body. She had a tight shirt on, and had flipped the bottom of the shirt up so her torso was showing. The same beautiful smile I was seeing on her face now would easily keep my attention on this picture if she hadn’t been holding up her index and middle finger directly in front of her stomach.
I’d stopped breathing. That hot and cold feeling was getting more intense as the silence filled the air with a terrifying excitement. I looked up to see Rachel freely crying, her hands covering her mouth as her bright blue eyes still showed her happiness as she stared at me. Waiting for my reaction. But I couldn’t figure out how to react, this had to be a dream. I’d wanted this; she hadn’t. She wouldn’t be this excited right now . . . right? Was this a trick, was I still not understanding what all this meant?
Somehow, even though I was sitting, I felt my legs weaken and knew I would have ended up on the floor just then if I’d been standing. My whole body felt weak, and at the same time, it felt like I was on top of the damn world.
My eyes left her face and hit her flat stomach. I tried to put the two together, whether I was still trying to understand what she was telling me, or if I was trying to confirm what I was sure I already knew . . . I really don’t know. I gently brought one hand up to her stomach, and a flash of Rachel moving my hands to her stomach just half an hour ago as I’d been undressing her hit me. A huff left me as I realized she had been telling me even then.
“Rachel—” I shook my head in disbelief and looked up at her, a smile pulling at my lips.
“You missed one,” she said and reached for the stack in my hand. Taking it from me, she removed the top picture and put it on the bottom before handing me back the pile. “There they”—she choked on a sob—“there they are.”
“Oh my God.” Any air that was left in my lungs left in a hard rush, and time stopped as I looked at the ultrasound picture. Two dark circles in the middle of a gray screen, and a little peanut shape in each circle. “This? These . . . they’re . . . oh my God.”
She laughed through her tears and pulled the pile from my hands to set it on the nightstand. Crawling on the bed to straddle my lap, she cupped my face in her hands and brought her forehead down to mine.
“This isn’t a joke? This is for real? You’re—we’re . . . we’re having twins? You’re pregnant?” She’d barely had time to nod before I crushed my mouth to hers and kissed her like I needed her in order to breathe. “I love you . . . fuck, Rachel. I love you so damn much.”
“I know, I know, I love you too,” she said when I released her mouth again.
“When did this happen? How long have you known? How far along are you? Are you—are you okay? I know you didn’t want this, but you seem so—”
She placed the tips of her fingers on my lips to stop my questions, and a knowing smile lit up her face again. I grabbed her wrist, kissed her fingers, and dropped her hand so I could run my knuckles over her stomach.
“I’m barely over nine weeks now, I just found out a week ago. With how everything happened after I came back, I wasn’t paying attention, so I hadn’t even noticed I’d missed a period. But I hadn’t gotten back on my birth control from being gone, and when I tried, my doctor wanted to see me first. I saw her last Friday, and she asked about how long I’d been off it, why I’d been off it, and if you and I had been together since then. When she asked when my last cycle was, I couldn’t remember one after the time when I’d been kidnapped, so she did a test to check before she put me on birth control again. It came back positive, and since I’d known it’d been a while from my last cycle, she did an ultrasound to measure the baby. And then there ended up being two . . .”
Tears started falling rapidly down Rachel’s cheeks, but never once did her smile leave her face.
“She figured I was around eight weeks, and I picked up the journal Trent had bought me on my way to meet Candice and Maddie. It took a while, but I finally figured out the dates of when everything was, and after checking I’m guessing it happened the night of the Fourth of July. My doctor had been right, I was a little over eight weeks that day.”
I shook my head and laughed softly as I glanced down at her flat stomach. “I still can’t believe this. And you’re okay? You seem happy.”
“Being kidnapped and not knowing if I would ever see you again changed the way I thought about a lot of things. Including having children. It still would have been ideal if we could’ve had some time of just being us before all this happened, but I’m not scared of being a mom anymore. I’m not scared of going through all of this without my mom. We have so many people that are there for us, and I know they’ll help.” She kissed my lips softly and smiled against them. “And having you still look at me like you wanted to rip my clothes off in front of everyone when I was holding Shea the other night helped.”
“Well, what can I say? You look good with a baby.”
Rachel laughed loudly. “We’ll see if you still feel that way when I’m the size of a whale.”
“I will,” I assured her.
“What about you? Are you okay? You still want this, now that it’s going to be a reality?”
“More than anything,” I told her as I pressed my lips to hers again.
Leaning back until I was lying on the bed, I rolled us over and hovered over her body. She dragged her hands through my hair and giggled when I bent low and kissed her stomach over and over.
“What does it feel like?”
“Nothing,” she said on a laugh as her fingertips continued to trail across my head.
“You haven’t really been sick, have you? I remember that day last week, but I can’t think of anything else.” I felt shitty for not noticing, if she had been. I should have picked up on this, shouldn’t I?
“Not really. There’s been times here and there, but from the horror stories I’ve heard, I don’t have it bad at all.”
I nodded and kissed her stomach again before reaching over to the nightstand. Grabbing the ultrasound picture, I laid it down on the bottom of her stomach and hopped off the bed, looking for my pants. After I found them, and took my phone out of the pocket, I walked back over to Rachel and opened up the camera app.
“What are you doing?”
“Letting everyone know about my present.”
That soft smile was back, before her eyes went wide in horror. “No! I’m in my bra and underwear!”
“Calm down, Sour Patch. I’m not about to let anyone see the rest of you. You’re mine, not theirs.”
All that you could see in the picture was her torso and the ultrasound picture. As soon as she gave me the okay, I set up a text to go to Mason, Candice, Maddie, Eli, and all our parents. Above the picture I typed out: MY WEDDING PRESENT, and underneath, I did a twist on Rachel’s words from the envelope: BABY RYAN 1 AND BABY RYAN 2 WILL BE HERE IN MARCH.
Once the message went through, I turned both our phones on silent and put them in my bag.
“What are you doing? You know they’re all going to call us.”
“Exactly,” I said as I climbed on top of her again and moved the ultrasound picture to a safe place. “But right now it’s our wedding night, and I’m not done celebrating with just you.”
Epilogue
Two and a half years later . . .
Rachel
“BABE, DO YOU HAVE KENNEDY?” I called as I went from room to room with Kira.
There is no way to keep track of twins that are running all over the place while you’re trying to get ready to go somewhere. I swear, if she is getting in Trip’s food again . . .
“Kash! Do you know—”
“Where this beautiful monster is?” he asked as he rounded the corner with Kennedy in his arms. She was missing her shirt.
I stopped and blew out a thankful breath that at least she was only missing an article of clothing instead of being completely naked, or covered in baby powder again like last time.
“Where’s her shirt?”
He shrugged and held her up to blow a raspberry on her stomach. “I don’t know. I was hoping you knew.”
“I don’t.” I looked at Kira in my arms and shook my head as I smiled at her. “Your sister is crazy, absolutely crazy!”
Kira just smiled and set her head down on my shoulder as we began walking through the house, looking for Kennedy’s shirt.
“Your daddy better be happy at least one of you is calm.”
“What? Kennedy’s just having a little fun.”
I shot him a look. “She can’t keep her clothes on. Are you going to keep saying that when she’s sixteen and still doing the same thing?”
His face fell into a look of pure horror. “Oh no. No, no, no. That’s it. You’re going to homeschool them. Both of them! And they’re not allowed near boys until they’re thirty. And . . . and . . . and from now on, they only wear dresses. Ugly ones that are three sizes too big.”
I laughed and leaned in to kiss Kennedy’s big smile. “You take after your daddy. The crazies.”
“I’m so serious, Rach. They’re never allowed out in public without me.”
“Yeah, okay.”
“Don’t act like that! You’re the one that said she was going to be taking her clothes off when she was sixteen.”
I rolled my eyes and pointed at the discarded shirt on the ground so he could bend down to pick it up. “She’s not even two, calm down. I was just saying that so I could make a point. And I’m not homeschooling them, or making them wear ugly clothes, so you can work at getting over that right now.”
He set Kennedy down and pulled her shirt back on before pointing at it. “You keep this on. Always. Even if boys tell you to take it off when you’re older. You don’t listen to—” He cut off and hung his head when Kennedy zoomed away again with Trip chasing after her.
“You’ll have a lot of time to tell her that when she’s older . . . when she’ll understand it.”
Looking up, he made a face at me before leaning forward and grabbing my hips. “I’m so glad you’re going to be a boy,” he said to my large stomach, and placed a kiss on it. Standing up, he pulled me as close as my stomach would allow and kissed me thoroughly until the shrill laugh of Kennedy filled the air.
“Naked baby.” I pointed as she ran through the living room and into the kitchen. “You catch her and I’ll finish getting Kira ready?”
“Oh, so you get the easy one tonight? Why?”
“Uh, yeah . . . because I’m Rachel.”
Kash smiled and kissed me hard once more. “The last time we had this conversation, it ended in you slapping me. So I’m just gonna keep my mouth shut.”
“Good choice.”
He winked and took off after our crazy daughter. “Kennedy, clothes stay on, baby girl.”
Once I had Kira ready, and we got Kennedy to keep her clothes on, we got all of us in the car to head over to Richard and Marcy’s for their New Year’s Eve party. Mason and his family were all going to be there along with some family friends, and I was ready for the time to hang out with everyone . . . and to have extra eyes to make sure Kennedy kept her clothes on.
We’d gone to California for Christmas, and while I wouldn’t suggest flying with two toddlers, it was so worth it to see my family again. Candice was still being Candice. I’d figured she’d start settling down after college, but she didn’t show any signs of stopping anytime soon. She was working at a physical therapy place, and loved her job . . . as well as half the men she worked with. But she was happy, she was enjoying her life the way she wanted to, and I was happy for her.
For the first time, I’d taken Kash and the girls to my parents’ graves. I still wrote to them daily whenever the girls went down for a nap, and writing to them was still something that made me feel closer to them. But I’d wanted my family to be able to talk to them too. Not that the girls really said much that made sense yet, but I was happy we’d all gone, and knew it was something we would do when we visited California again.
Kash grabbed my hand, and pulled it toward him to kiss the inside of my palm when we were a couple minutes from his parents’. I smiled over at him and curled my hand around his to squeeze it, and his eyes flashed on my pale blue nails. Kissing them, he smirked at me before bringing our hands down to rest on the center console.
“I wonder what color he’ll send this time.”
I didn’t have to look at his eyes to know there was no lingering doubt there. After Kash had given me the option to leave with Trent, and we’d talked about everything I’d been feeling, he seemed to understand how I viewed Trent. Nothing more than my protector, and friend. A month after Trent had left, I knew for sure that Kash was finally okay with him.
Every month, on the fourth, a small package was delivered to Kash at the police department. And every month, I was waiting anxiously for him to come home with it. It was always a bottle of nail polish with a card that only ever said two words. “I’m fine.” The only time it ever changed was on the Fourth of July. Along with the polish, there would be a new journal for me, and somewhere in the middle would be a letter from him giving me more insight into his new life, without ever giving away his name, location, or job.
That first month, Kash had been confused but had finally pieced it together by the time his shift was ending. He’d read my journal from when I’d been kidnapped, and remembered everything Trent had bought me, and was honestly appreciative that Trent was—in a weird way—letting me know he was safe. I wished there was a way for me to thank him, but there was never a return address, and every month it was somehow sent from a different state. Besides, he was already risking a lot; it could put him in danger if we tried to get in touch with him. So I would be happy with my monthly gift from him. At least Kash and I could be happy for him and his new life, based on the two letters.
With a soft smile, I squeezed Kash’s hand and said, “Few more days and we’ll find out, I guess.”
After putting the car in park, Kash looked at me seriously and whispered, “I’ve got fifty on orange.”
“Silver,” I whispered back. “And you’re on.”
He laughed and kissed me swiftly before getting out of the car. After we got Kennedy and Kira out of the car, we made our way inside the house, and everyone rushed over to take the girls.
“Oh, we haven’t seen you in so long!” Marcy crooned at Kennedy as Richard took Kira.
“Mom, it’s been a week and a half.”
She leveled her signature glare at Kash, before smiling and raining kisses all over Kennedy’s face. “Don’t start with me, Logan. A week and a half is a long time to go without my favorite girls.”
“Rachel!” Maddie screamed, and ran toward me.
Kash stepped in front of me and blocked my stomach. “Calm down, turbo.”
Maddie rolled her eyes and pushed him aside as she bounced up and down on her toes, her left hand going in front of her face as she squealed.
“Oh my God! Congratulations!” I grabbed her hand and looked at the ring on her finger before pulling her in for a hug. “When did he ask?”
“Christmas!”
“Congrats, and nice rock, Aaron,” I teased as I pulled Maddie’s new fiancé in for a hug.
Like I hadn’t known. I’d gone with him to pick out the ring.
“She loves it. Thank you,” Aaron whispered into my ear, and I winked when he pulled back.
I listened to Maddie tell me all the details of the proposal as I accepted hugs from her parents and other family friends. After we’d said hello to everyone, Kash pulled me into his chest and ran his hands over my swollen belly, and I continued talking to Maddie as he talked to Aaron.
Maddie and I had grown incredibly close over the last couple years, and I was so happy to see her with Aaron. Too many guys had burned her before. Aaron had swooped in at the perfect time, and was beyond perfect for her. He was the biggest sweetheart I’d ever met; and though he seemed pretty calm for Maddie’s overexcited personality, they balanced each other really well.
“Where’s my brother?” she suddenly asked.
Kash shrugged. “I don’t know, he said he’d be here. But I haven’t seen him since before we left for California.”
“I haven’t seen him since before Aaron and I got engaged. He keeps saying he’s busy, I want to show him my ring!”
Looking up at my husband, I nudged his stomach with my elbow. “Call him, babe.”
Keeping one hand on my stomach, he pulled out his phone and brought up Mason’s number.
Kash and Mason were still in the gang unit, and things were going as well as they could in that field. Mason was at our house more often than not and loved playing “Uncle Mase” to the girls. Like Candice, Kash and I had been hoping he’d settle down soon . . . but girls came and went from his apartment just as often as they always had.
“Mason’s bringing a girl,” Kash spoke directly into my ear so no one else could hear us.
Apparently I’d spoken too soon.
“Like . . . ?”
“Like a girlfriend.”
“No way!” I hissed and looked up at him. Kash looked just as surprised as I felt.
A shriek filled the living room and I turned to see Kennedy running as fast as her little toddler legs would carry her.
“Jesus,” I whispered and pointed. “Naked baby.”
Kash laughed and kissed the back of my neck. “You are homeschooling the girls.”
“Whatever you say, Kash.” I winked and watched him take off after Kennedy.
Marcy walked up next to me and handed me Kennedy’s forgotten clothes. “How do you keep that girl in these?”
“We haven’t figured out a way yet. Where’s Kira?”
“Sleeping in Rich’s arms.”
I turned until I spotted them, and smiled at my daughter and father-in-law. They were so cute together.
“Okay, well, I’m going to help Kash with Kennedy, be right back.”
Taking the clothes from her, I walked through the halls until I heard Kennedy’s belly laugh and found Kash blowing more raspberries on her stomach.
“I caught the monster.”
“Your mom collected all her clothes.”
After we got her dressed again, I lifted her onto my hip and walked out toward the living room. Marcy was waiting at the entrance of the hall and made grabby hands at Kennedy.
“Come back to Ya Ya, sweet girl, let’s go hang out with Poppi and Kira.”
Handing her over to Marcy, I giggled when Kash pulled us back into the hall and pressed us close as his mouth teased the sensitive spot behind my ear.
“I don’t think so, mister.”
“I can’t help it . . . this is the one time we’re not chasing after our girls and someone else is watching them. And, fuck, Rachel, you look so hot. Swear to God I’m keeping you pregnant all the time. We’re going to have a football team.”
I laughed and elbowed his stomach. “Whatever.”
“Don’t ‘whatever’ me, Sour Patch. You know you’re sexy as hell.”
I rolled my eyes and turned to kiss him before whispering against his lips, “Liar.”
“Never.”
He captured my lips and I moaned into his mouth when his tongue caressed mine.
“Naked baby!” Maddie called and I let my forehead drop onto Kash’s chest.
“Homeschooling those girls, woman.” He kissed me again before taking off after a squealing Kennedy.
I walked to the front of the hall and scooped up a tired-looking Kira as I enjoyed the view.
Maddie and Aaron were talking quietly in a corner. Close friends were gathered in clumps around the living room and kitchen—some talking to their group, others laughing at the circus that was my family. Richard and Mr. Gates were wiping back tears as they laughed over Mrs. Gates, Marcy, and Kash chasing after Kennedy and looking for her clothes. Soon Mason and this mystery girl would be here, and she would get the crash course in meeting everyone while we all individually interrogated her.
I loved my family, and I loved our life. Kash and I had gone through rough times at the beginning, but life was good and I prayed it would stay that way. There was never a dull moment—there were plenty of laughs, and plenty of happy and sad tears. He and I still fought like there was no tomorrow, and pancakes were made a few times a week . . . but we loved each other fiercely, and we helped each other through everything. Most importantly, there were never any lies.
