Текст книги "NERDS: National Espionage, Rescue, and Defense Society"

Автор книги: Michael Buckley

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Текущая страница: 12 (всего у книги 13 страниц)

Jackson rushed after his beautiful partner through a series of dark hallways. He was just beginning to wonder if she had gotten them lost when they raced through a set of double doors into what appeared to be an observation room. On one wall was a bank of windows that looked out over an enormous laboratory. A laptop computer sat on a desk, and there was a huge jigsaw puzzle spread out over the floor. One glance revealed that it was a map of the world, only with the continents crammed together into one huge island.

“Look at this,” the Hyena said as she stared through the windows.

In the lab below, a gigantic satellite dish was pointed toward the sky. At its center was a large rod that seemed to grow brighter with every passing minute. Henchmen rushed about running tests on the dish, and in the far corner a group of scientists wearing orange jumpsuits cowered in fear. Jackson saw Dr. Badawi among them.

“Look!” the Hyena said, pointing to the other side of the room. There, with their arms and legs locked inside heavy silver balls, was his team: Heathcliff, Ruby, Matilda, Duncan, Flinch, Agent Brand, and the lunch lady. Jackson wondered why they didn’t just use their upgrades to escape, but then spotted more of the bright orange EMP transmitters mounted around them.

“We’ve got to save them first,” Jackson said. “Then we take out the machine.”

“Not so fast,” the Hyena said. “That lab is swarming with henchmen and goons. We’re outnumbered. If we’re going to save the day, we need to have a plan.”

“I’m all ears,” Jackson said.

“Me? I’m supposed to make the plan?” the Hyena said. She looked out on the lab one final time, then took off her boot. She turned the heel toward the glass that separated them from the lab below, and used it to carve a large circle. A circle of glass fell back into the room. Jackson heard the loud rumblings of the machine through the hole in the window, and could feel a strange and powerful vibration. It shook his internal organs and bones and magnetically tugged on his braces.

“Interesting footwear you have there,” he said.

“Expensive, too,” the Hyena said as she stepped through the hole in the glass and onto a tiny ledge that ran along the walls of the massive lab. The ledge was a foot wide and there was nothing to catch them if they fell. “C’mon.”

“C’mon where?” Jackson asked.

Impatiently, the Hyena pointed to a ladder that led down from the ledge on the other side of the enormous room. The ladder would drop them right behind the platform where the NERDS team was imprisoned. Knowing he had few options, Jackson slowly followed the Hyena.

“If we fall, it’s going to hurt,” Jackson said.

“Then don’t fall. It would still feel better than getting zapped with one of those,” the Hyena said as she pointed down to the floor. A team of thirty henchmen with huge weapons strapped to their chests marched into the lab. “Those guards are carrying microwave blasters. Instead of bullets, they shoot high-intensity microwave radiation. If we get caught in their sights, we’ll be cooked like a Hot Pocket.”

The duo did their best not to look down at the floor far below them. Every one of Jackson’s nerves was tense by the time they reached the ladder and climbed down to the platform where the team was held.

“What are you doing here, Jackson?” Ruby asked.

“I’ve come to save your life and the world, if we get lucky,” Jackson replied.

“And you brought one of Jigsaw’s goons to help you?” Matilda asked.

“I’m not a goon!” the Hyena cried.

“She’s very sensitive about the goon thing. Any idea how to get you out of these shackles?” Jackson asked, steering the conversation back toward the dilemma at hand.

“I’ve tried to break free but they’re too strong,” the lunch lady said.

“It doesn’t matter,” Agent Brand said. “If you free us, the team is helpless with those EMPs jamming their upgrades.”

“How do we turn them off?” the Hyena asked.

“There’s a control panel over there,” Duncan said, turning his head toward the group of goons with the microwave blasters.

“You mean that tiny panel on the wall where the murderers with superweapons are?” Jackson complained, then turned to the Hyena. “Any suggestions?”

“Hey, I can’t come up with all the plans,” she said.

“The two of you should just go,” Heathcliff said. “We’re already in hot water. You’re just going to make it worse.”

“Heathcliff, I was a jerk to you and you’re probably going to hate me forever, but right now I’m here to save your life.”

“I’d be happy if you saved my life,” Flinch said.

“I’ll do my best.” Jackson scanned the room and noticed two guards standing at the front of the platform. They had their backs turned to the hostages and hadn’t heard a word of the conversation over the sounds from Jigsaw’s noisy machine. “I’ve got an idea. Give me that boot of yours.”

The Hyena understood what he had in mind. They tiptoed to the front of the platform, and Jackson brought the boot down hard on one guard’s head. He toppled over unconscious, and the duo went to work on his companion. Then they dragged the henchmen back behind the platform.

In a flash they were dressed in the guards’ clothing. The outfits were both way too big, but they rolled up the sleeves and legs and tucked in the pants. As they strolled across the floor, no one gave them a second look. They stepped right into the crowd of goons and stopped at the control panel.

“Hey, anyone know which button turns off the EMP machines?” Jackson asked.

“Yeah, it’s the green button,” one of the goons said without a second look.

“Thanks,” Jackson replied as he slammed his hand down on the button. There was a loud siren and several flashing lights, and all the goons turned toward them.

“Hey! Who are you?” one shouted at Jackson.

“We’re the people they sent to kick your butts,” the Hyena said as she spun a roundhouse kick and caught one of the giant goons in the stomach. He hunched over and she brought his head down on her knee. Seconds later he was drifting into dreamland.

Jackson could feel his braces coming to life. They shot out of his mouth and slammed into the guards’ jaws, one after another. The two of them made quick work of the thugs. Jackson looked back at his team. He guessed the person to watch would be Flinch, and he was right. The silver balls that locked Flinch’s hands cracked open. A second later he was pulling his feet out as well.

“Let’s knock some heads!” Flinch shouted, then banged on his chest like a gorilla.

“What’s his story?” the Hyena asked.

“He eats a little too much sugar,” Jackson explained as they ran over to his team.

“Flinch, free Choppers first!” Agent Brand shouted, and the littlest of the team did just that. Then he smashed the bindings holding Wheezer, then Gluestick, then Pufferfish. Lastly, he freed Agent Brand and the lunch lady. In the meantime, a group of angry henchmen with microwave blasters were heading their way.

Matilda’s inhalers shot her into the sky, and she buzzed over the villains. They lifted their weapons to fire on her, but she circled them so quickly that in an instant they were blasting one another with microwave radiation. Their numbers went from twenty to five. Duncan stepped forward and grabbed the remaining henchmen’s hands. A thick river of adhesive sprayed from his fingertips. They cried out in frustration when they aimed their blasters; their fingers were glued in place and they could not pull the triggers.

As Ruby looked on, her entire body began to swell and her skin turned blotchy and red. “There’s more on the way!” she cried. “My allergies tell me there’s at least a hundred.”

No sooner had she spoken than doors at both ends of the lab flew open. Dozens of armed henchmen and goons raced in, firing into the air and barking threats. The lunch lady leaped off the platform into the fray, and with fists flying he pounded the men off their feet. Agent Brand wielded his white cane. He flipped it around, cracking the goons on their noses and slamming it into their Adam’s apples. Despite Brand’s wounded leg, Jackson could see what Ms. Holiday had said about him was right. He was the best secret agent the world had ever seen.

The Hyena and Ruby leaped into the fight as well. The Hyena’s fighting style was elegant, almost like a dance. She kicked and punched with confidence and her opponents collapsed around her. Ruby, on the other hand, had an incredibly uncanny ability to avoid being injured. She seemed able to leap or duck out of the way of every attack. Jackson suspected she was allergic to physical violence. Many of the henchmen collapsed in exhaustion from trying and failing to beat her to a pulp. Others exposed themselves at the wrong time, and Ruby took advantage of the opening with a well-timed kick or karate chop.

“They’re amazing,” Jackson said as he looked out on the team.

“You took the words right out of my mouth,” said Agent Brand, who was catching his breath nearby. “I … I couldn’t get past their ages, Jackson. I felt like I was baby-sitting a bunch of high-tech crybabies but … they’re as good as I ever was.”

Jackson nodded. “Don’t feel bad. I thought they were a bunch of misfits and losers. I guess we were both wrong.”

The doors flew open once more, and a hundred more goons raced in with microwave blasters. There seemed to be an endless supply.

“Choppers, this would be a good time to use your upgrades,” Agent Brand called to the bucktoothed boy.

“Yes, I agree,” Heathcliff replied. He stepped toward the thugs, paused, and then turned back toward his team.

“What are you doing, Choppers?” Ruby asked.

“That’s not my name,” the boy said as he reached into his pocket. He took out a black mask and slipped it over his head. It had a white skull painted on the front and exposed his bright, ivory teeth. “My name is Simon, and what Simon says … goes.”

“You’re Simon?” the Hyena cried. “But that means you’re behind all this!”

Duncan looked faint. “No!” he cried.

“Yes,” Simon replied. “Well, of course I had help from Dr. Jigsaw.”

Dr. Jigsaw and Dumb Vinci stepped through the crowd of henchmen, all of whom had their blasters aimed at the team.

“Heathcliffi Why?” Matilda said.

“Because I am sick and tired of this world, Matilda. It’s upside down and inside out. Nothing makes sense. How else can you explain a world that cherishes charm and good looks over intelligence? How else can you explain a place where people are tormented because they are smart? Or because they don’t wear the right clothes? Or because they can’t fit their round bodies into the square holes? The planet is terrible, Wheezer. Especially to people like us. We’re brilliant, creative people but we’re treated like fools—shoved in lockers. Given wedgies. Laughed at. Things have to change. Luckily, my good friend Dr. Jigsaw thinks so too. Admittedly, we have different agendas. He wants to re-create a world that’s long gone. I just want to smash it to pieces.”

“You’re as crazy as Jigsaw,” Jackson said.

“If that’s true, then it’s all because of you.” Heathcliff pointed an angry finger at Jackson. “You tortured me with your stupid pranks. You made me feel small and insignificant. My IQ is a billion times yours, yet you walked around like you owned our school.”

“Heathcliff, I was a different person then,” Jackson said.

“Maybe, but there’s more like you out there. There’s a million Jackson Joneses. Maybe billions, and the only way to stop them is to take their minds off picking on nerds and geeks. I’m going to give them something else to concentrate on—like the end of the world. Simon says turn on your machine, Dr. Jigsaw. Let’s keep washing our hands of this whole stinking planet. North America next, I think.”

Dr. Jigsaw climbed a small flight of stairs to a platform beneath the satellite dish. “This will only take a minute, Simon.”

Jigsaw pushed buttons, and the machine’s humming grew dramatically. There was a loud grinding sound, along with beeps and twitters. Then a green beam shot out of the top of the rod and zipped into the sky above. “It’s starting!” the weird scientist cried.

“Stop this, Jigsaw,” Brand begged. “You’re killing yourself, too.” The secret agent hobbled forward to stop him, but Dumb Vinci knocked Brand to the ground.

The tractor beam was at full power, and the room rocked back and forth as if it were on a stormy sea.

A huge video monitor rose up out of the floor and flickered to life. It was set to a kids’ puppet show, but that was quickly interrupted by an urgent newscast. A startled reporter appeared on the screen.

“We’re joining you now live from the CNN newsroom. Reports are coming in of earthquakes in California, North Carolina, Yucatán, and Newfoundland. Another report just in to the newsroom claims that a massive tidal wave slammed into the North Slope of Alaska. We’re going to check in with our meteorologist, Christopher Storm, to see if he can give us any insight on these incredible, almost simultaneous natural disasters.”

The image changed to a nervous man looking over a computer readout. His face was pale and terrified. “Yes. First, I’m not really sure how to explain what is happening around the continent. These are phenomena like I’ve never seen, and I’m not sure there are words that would do them justice. What I can say is our satellites are telling us that North America seems to be moving. Again, North America seems to be moving. Now, there may have been some massive change in the tectonic plates, but I can’t imagine what could have triggered it. For now, the National Weather Service is declaring a state of emergency for the United States. Canada, Mexico, and other countries are doing the same. Viewers are encouraged to stay in their homes. If you’re on the street, there’s a very good chance that you could die, so please, just stay indoors. Wait, I have some satellite pictures. Can we show them?”

Some images from space appeared on the screen. It was clear that they were tracking the movement of North America as it was drifting eastward toward Europe.

“I can’t believe it,” the weatherman said. “I just can’t believe it!”

“Look at the destruction you’re causing!” Duncan cried.

“I’m doing this for us,” Heathcliff said as he turned his back on his former teammate.

“Destroy the beam!” Ruby shouted, and the NERDS rushed into action. Matilda fired concussion blasts, and Flinch punched the satellite dish with superpowered fists. But before they could do any real damage, they heard Heathcliff’s voice once more.

“Simon says stop it!” he shouted.

And that’s when Jackson knew things had gone from bad to worse. He looked over at his teammates. Each of them was in a deep trance. Their eyes glazed over.

“Kill Jackson Jones and the Hyena,” Heathcliff said.

“Yes,” they said in unison.

“Uh, if you can use those superbraces, now would be a good time,” the Hyena cried.

The entire team attacked at once. Jackson tried to stop them. He turned his braces into a giant flyswatter and smacked Matilda out of the sky. Then the flyswatter morphed into a gigantic hand, scooped up some henchmen, and tossed them at Duncan and Ruby. Next the braces turned into a metal cage that clamped down over Flinch. Jackson was actually beating his own team of superspies, but the cage had been a terrible mistake. Flinch punched the bars, ripping a huge hole in them. The little nanobytes in Jackson’s mouth swirled in agitation and slinked back onto his teeth. As his teammates approached again, he tried to activate his braces once more, but they popped and smoked. Flinch had damaged them, and now they were useless.

“I’m afraid we have a problem,” he said to the Hyena.

“All right, I guess I have to do everything around here,” she said as she reached into her pocket and took out a pair of earplugs. “Put these in your ears.”

“What are these for?”

The Hyena frowned. “I have an ability myself.”

“Like my braces?”

“Yes, and just as embarrassing. Put these in your ears and promise me you won’t take them out until I tell you.”

“Fine,” Jackson said, though he was totally confused. He shoved the plugs into his ears and smiled at the pretty assassin. “Happy? Oh, that’s weird. I can barely hear myself.”

Whatever the Hyena’s plan, Jackson was sure he and the assassin would be killed at any moment by his superpowered teammates. But suddenly they stopped. Bewildered, he watched as one after the other began to smirk, then shake, and though he couldn’t hear, it was clear they were breaking down into complete hysterical laughter. Jackson turned to his partner and saw that she was giggling herself … but not as uncontrollably as everyone else in the room. Jackson had to know what was going on so he took the earplugs out. What he heard was the most obnoxious, donkeylike, ridiculous laugh he had ever heard. It came out of the Hyena, and was so silly and stupid he couldn’t help but laugh at it too. Soon his chuckle grew into a guffaw and the guffaw into a chortle and the chortle into a gut-busting, pain-inducing laugh. He was about to fall over from the pain in his side when the Hyena snatched his earplugs out of his hand and shoved them back into his ears. Her laughter disappeared, as did his giggle fit. He now knew where his partner got her name.

Finally, the Hyena removed the earplugs from his ears again. Jackson surveyed her attack. Everyone was on the floor holding their bellies—even Heathcliff and Dr. Jigsaw. Unfortunately, the green beam from the satellite dish was still blasting into space.

“If we’re going to save the world, we’d better do it now,” the Hyena said.

“But I don’t have my upgrades.” Jackson said. What could he do? He was just a kid with a broken pair of bionic braces. How did he get to such a point in his life? From star quarterback, to nerd with magnetized dental appliances, to secret agent in major trouble. And then it hit him.

“Help me get Flinch to his feet,” he shouted as the two raced to the tiny boy’s side. They helped him up and shook him until he stopped laughing and could concentrate on what they were saying. “Flinch, have you got enough juice in your harness to toss something at that machine?”

Flinch reached into his pocket and took out a box of chocolate-covered raisins. “I will! What do you have in mind?”

“Me,” Jackson said.

Agent Brand staggered to his feet, still giggling, and grabbed Jackson by the arm. “Absolutely not.”

“When you asked me to join the team, you said I reminded you of yourself, right? What would you do to save the world?” Jackson said as he turned back to Flinch. “Have you ever tossed a football?”

Flinch hoisted him off the ground with little effort. “Once. My older brother tried to show me.”

“Imagine I’m a football,” Jackson said.

“What are you doing?” Ruby cried.

“Ms. Holiday said the tip of this tractor beam is actually a giant magnet,” Jackson explained. “I just happen to have a set of braces that are highly magnetized.”

“You’re crazy,” Matilda said.

“You taught me that a good secret agent can use anything as a weapon,” Jackson said. “On three, Flinch. Hut, hut, hike!”

The boy tossed Jackson into the air. He soared high to the very center of the satellite dish, with a wide smile on his face. The magnet in the tip of the rod tugged at his braces. The tentacles swirled out, whipping around wildly. They smashed at the rod, and soon the machine began to show signs of failure. The green beam of energy began to sputter. Jackson’s obnoxious dental work was destroying Jigsaw’s doomsday device.

“No!” Dr. Jigsaw cried.

Jackson looked down and saw Flinch pushing at one of the girders that held the satellite dish in place. He gave it a good shove with his shoulder, and it started to tilt over.

Now Jackson and the machine were falling, and there was nothing he could do to stop from crashing into the ground and probably dying on impact. Matilda flew to his side and tried to pull him off the dish, but she wasn’t strong enough to break the hold of the magnet. So she used one of her inhalers to hover and the other to burn the rod holding Jackson in half. The magnet that held him fast came away, and Matilda flew Jackson to safety just as Jigsaw’s doomsday device tumbled over. The mad scientist leaped out of the way, but his goon, Dumb Vinci, was not so lucky. His arm was caught beneath a jagged piece of the crumbling device, and he screamed in agony.

Unfortunately, this was not an end to the problems at hand. The dish crashed through the lab’s ice floor and sank. The last ebb of the tractor beam hit the ocean floor deep beneath the fortress. As the beam exerted its pull, the icy ocean floor shot upward, forming an ice mountain that rose high into the air, taking Jigsaw’s fortress and its inhabitants with it. In the midst of the cataclysm, the Hyena slipped and tumbled over the side of a rapidly rising cliff. She held on with all her strength, but when Jackson rushed to her, she was already slipping. He reached out and snatched her by the arm.

“Don’t let me go,” she said, looking down at the long drop below.

“I’ve got you,” he promised.

“You!” a voice roared behind them. “You did this!”

Jackson turned his head just in time to see Heathcliff rush forward. “You, a complete moron, stopped my plan,” Heathcliff said. He stomped hard on Jackson’s leg, causing him to roll over the edge of the cliff. With his free hand Jackson snatched at the edge, holding on to the Hyena with his other hand. He felt like he was being ripped in two.

Heathcliff stomped down on Jackson’s fingers, but Jackson refused to let go. Still, he knew one more stomp from Choppers’s boot would be the end of him and the Hyena.

Then there was a blur of movement, and Jackson watched as Heathcliff came sailing over the edge of the cliff. He screamed all the way down until his cries could no longer be heard.

Standing over Jackson was Ruby. She was scratching her scalp. “I’m allergic to betrayal.”