Текст книги "The Stillburrow Crush"

Автор книги: Linda Kage

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The Stillburrow Crush

by Linda Kage

usually went to be alone was the park. But that was too close to home and my parents would probably find me there, and then I'd have to explain the whole suspension thing. But the library was right across the street. I crossed the empty road and jogged up the wide marble steps of the library. A cold breeze flapped against the collar of my coat. I shifted my heavy book bag to my other shoulder and opened the door.

Silence seemed to waft out and greet me. I knew the librarian was usually at her desk, which was directly to the right. I didn't want her to see me and ask why I wasn't in school, so I entered quietly and turned straight to the left. I found a deserted corner, which wasn't hard since the tiny library was empty of patrons, and there I started my campout. Since I wasn't going to be in school for a week, I thought I could come here in the days and study each class for an hour, the hour I should've been in that class. That way I wouldn't be so far behind next week.

I was no longer thinking about dropping out of SEC. I'd settled down a lot since that irrational moment in the hallway with Luke. I wasn't looking forward to going back after losing five days of class work, no, but I was thankful I wouldn't be missing any tests. And I was worried about the newspaper. I was the only member on the journalism staff who really did anything with The Central Record. The teacher was going to be pulling her hair out by Friday when deadlines hit. I guess she'd just have to go to her friendly principal to complain if there were problems.

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I tried to concentrate on reading through all the different textbooks, but it was near to impossible. Who actually read those books, anyway? Talk about dry writing. But I eventually came up with a way to amuse myself as I scanned. Here's an example of what I did. My history book quoted, "John Wilkes Booth, an unknown actor and southern sympathizer, assassinated President Abraham Lincoln at Ford's Theatre on April 14, 1865."

So I just penciled in my own translation in my notebook, writing, "It was April 14th and spring was blooming. Only days before, the North had won their grueling war. Life was good for the president and his wife. And what better way could they celebrate than to attend the distinguished Ford's Theatre and watch a relaxing play. But the South had one last attack before they would admit defeat. One man, John Wilkes Booth, who was a Rebel at heart, slipped into Abraham Lincoln's box seat and shot him in the back of the head, killing not only the man but the leader of this united nation." OK, so it wasn't that exciting but writing helped me keep my mind off things. So I wrote and I wrote. Finally, it was late enough in the afternoon I felt I should start venturing from the library. I knew I should go home, to save myself from even more punishment for staying away. But there was another stop I needed to make first.

I seriously needed to see Marty. I walked along Birch Street and then up Adams. I passed Georgia's and ducked a quick peek through the windows to make sure my mom wasn't inside before I crossed the street toward the grocery 183

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store. When I pulled opened the door to Getty's General, the bell jingled over my head.

I skidded to a stop when I saw the owner of the store, and not my brother, at the cash register. There were only a handful of customers cruising the four aisles and no one was checking out at that moment. John Getty turned toward me. He had a ready smile on his face but it froze in place when he saw that it was a Paxton filling the entrance.

"Can I help you?" he said, through unmoving, stiff lips. I shook my head and started to move in reverse. Where was Marty?

"I'm sorry," I said, right before I backed into the door. I groped behind me, pushed it open, and escaped. What was going on? Why wasn't Marty at work? I started to breathe heavily, already suspecting the worst. I ran the whole way to his place. The small house he rented with Austin Fitz, owned by Austin's parents, was situated next door to the funeral home on Main Street. I pounded up their front steps and threw open the screen door. The regular door was already open and I charged in on Austin as he lay sprawled on the sofa in sweats, playing a video game on the television. Austin, who looked nothing like his younger brother, E.T., worked nights at the gas station. He looked like he'd just awakened and gone straight to the television. His eyes were blurry and his hair was sticking up. An empty cereal bowl sat on the floor in front of him.

"Come on in," he called, even though I was already inside. He sent me a sleepy smile. "What's up, little sister?"

"Where's Marty?"

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Austin's smile fell and he shook his head. "He ain't doing so well. The guy's bummed out, let me tell you."

"Where is he?" I repeated.

Austin shrugged. "Haven't seen him. I'd check his room if I were you."

I rolled my eyes and started toward Marty's room. I tried to open his door but it was locked. So I pounded.

"Marty! Open this door right now." I continued to pound until the door cracked opened and my very mad-looking brother glared out at me. "Stop pounding," he said, wincing. "You're giving me a headache, stupid."

He looked about as bad as I'd ever seen him. Dark rings circled his sunken eyes and he hadn't shaved in a while. Strong whiffs of alcohol escaped from his room, choking me.

"Let me in," I said.

I tried to push my way inside, but the rest of his body was blocking the door. He snarled at me. "Cut it out. I'm not dressed"

I gave him a get-real look. "I'm not blind, Marty. I can see your shirt and jeans through the crack in the door." I put my weight against the wood. "I need to talk to you." He didn't budge. "So talk."

I glanced toward the living room where his roommate was playing video games. Marty caught my meaning but only shrugged.

"Fine," I said. I crossed my arms over my chest and glared. "Egghead just suspended me for a week, thanks to you."

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Marty glared at me for a moment. We had a small stareoff. We'd had hundreds of stare-offs over the years and we usually used them to determine if the other person was lying or not. I knew the routine so I gazed back, giving him my serious face.

When Marty was satisfied I spoke the truth, he squeezed his eyes shut and hissed out a curse. Then he stepped back and let me in.

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Chapter Fourteen

"Why'd he suspend you?" Marty said, when he closed the door behind us

I felt like I'd been shut inside a dumpster. The stench of alcohol and other rotten things about knocked me over. It was chilly and damp and dark. Too cave-like for my comfort. Marty had even thrown blankets over the windows to keep out the light.

"Why aren't you at work?" I strode to the windows, tripping over shoes and pizza boxes and who knew what else on the floor as I went.

I yanked the sheets off, and daylight poured into the room.

Marty groaned and winced. "I liked them where they were," he said through clenched teeth. I spun around to face him. He'd sat down on the edge of his unmade bed and was lifting his hand to shade his eyes.

"Did you get fired?"

Empty beer cans littered the floor between us. Dirty laundry was piled in various mounds around the room. Marty fell back on the mattress and stared up at the ceiling.

"Leave me alone," he said, closing his eyes. I came to stare down at him. "Did they fire you?"

"Yes!" he yelled.

"Why?"

He spit out a contemptuous laugh. "Why do you think, brat? How much brainpower does it take to come up with that 187

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answer? Abby's mom is John Getty's little sister. And John was my boss. Why would he keep me around after all this?" I sat down beside him. "Is she pregnant or not?" Marty opened his eyes and they once again focused on the ceiling. His jaw moved and his Adam's apple slid up and then down as he swallowed.

"I guess not," he finally said.

I lay down then, next to him, and stared up at the ceiling as well. "So it's over between you two, huh?" Marty gave another short laugh when he said, "Yeah."

"You're just going to stay in your room and get drunk, then?"

"It's the best plan I've thought up yet."

"I wouldn't take the sissy's way out if I were you," I said, propping my knees up and resting the soles of my shoes on his mattress.

Marty turned his head to glare at me. "Well, you're not me. Now get off my bed."

I didn't move except to let my knees sway back and forth.

"What happened?"

Marty sighed. "Nothing. Why'd you get suspended?"

"Because Egghead thought I told everyone in school his daughter was pregnant." Because it'd been a few hours since that actual event occurred, I was able to speak of it clearly, almost as if I was proud of the fact.

Marty's eyes narrowed on me. "Did you?" I slugged him in the arm. "No, you idiot. I did not. Why would I spread something like that? Even though I did think it 188

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was true until Egghead called me into his office and very distinctly clarified the facts of the situation." Marty sat up so quickly he about had me rolling off the side of the bed because of the sudden shift in weight on the mattress. He stared down at me, shocked. "He told you?" I frowned. "Told me what?"

Marty instantly looked away. "Nothing." I sat up then too. "What?"

Marty shook his head. "Never mind." He glanced at me.

"Why didn't you just tell him you didn't start the rumors?" My jaw dropped. "I did! The man wouldn't listen to a word I said. Let me tell you, he was mad!"

"So?" Marty set his feet on the floor and stared at the wall in front of him.

"So," I repeated. I frowned as I watched Marty hold his stomach and start to rock back and forth. Then I shook my head and tried to continue with my story. "So he was mad enough to charge at me."

"He what?" Marty looked at me sharply.

"He told me to get out of his office, but I was trying to explain my innocence." I shrugged. "I guess he got sick of it because he started around his desk like he was going to hurt me."

"That son of a..." Marty surged to his feet and started toward the door, swaying as he went.

I ran after him and grabbed his arm. I had to dig my feet into the floor to stop him. "Where do you think you're going?"

"I'm going to kill him."

"Marty!"

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His hand was on the doorknob and he yanked it open. I kicked the door shut with my foot and jumped in front of it, blocking his path. My brother had murder in his eyes. I'd never seen him like this before. It scared me.

"Stop it," I said. "What's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me?" He pointed a finger at his chest and stared at me like he couldn't believe I didn't understand.

"That man took away the only girl I ever cared about. He got me fired from my job. He killed my baby. And now he's threatening my sister. How much more do you expect me to take?"

I gasped. The news knocked the breath out of me. If I hadn't been leaning against the door, I would have had to grab it for support. Suddenly, I felt lightheaded. I guess Marty was dizzy too, because he wilted right there onto the floor in front of me and cradled his face in his hands. I moved my hand over my stomach where my guts were twisting into knots. "What are you talking about, Marty?" His speech was muffled in his hands as he moaned the words but I heard him clearly. "She was pregnant," he said. "I swear to God she was pregnant."

My knees gave out then. I knelt down in front of him and touched his shoulder. "You're not saying what I think you're saying, are you?"

He looked up at me and his eyes were rimmed in red. He sniffed. "I saw the two lines on the test. I...saw...them." He took my hands and squeezed. "There was a baby, Carrie. Two lines meant she was pregnant."

I shook my head.

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But Marty nodded. "I went to her house right after I told Mom and Dad. She said her dad wanted to take her to a doctor in Paulbrook the next morning, to make sure it was true. But we'd already taken one of those home pregnancy things. We already knew she was pregnant." He blew out a shaky breath. "I said OK, though, and I left her alone. I saw her and her dad leave the next morning when they drove by the house. It was nighttime before they got back." He swallowed and for a moment he couldn't talk. I couldn't believe him. It just wasn't something that happened to someone from Stillburrow. I mean, Mr. and Mrs. Eggrow dedicated their lives to children. Why would they...I shook my head. It wasn't possible.

Marty wiped at his eyes. "When I went to see her that night, she said there wasn't a baby after all and we should call things off." He rocked back and forth, staring at something on the wall. "About as soon as I got home, John called. He told me not to bother coming into work the next morning."

My brother winced as if he was going through the whole experience all over again. His shoulders shook and I did the only thing I could think to do. I hugged him. He buried his face in my shoulder and let loose. His sobs racked through both of us.

"I loved her," he said. "I really did. I thought we were going to get married and buy a house across from the park. I thought we were going to have a family. And I could start up my own business. Just like Dad."

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And Abby would've been perfectly miserable, just like Mom. She'd pretend she had this perfect life and this happy little family, when all she wanted was something better.

"They didn't even ask me," he said. I shook my head. "Maybe there never was a baby."

"There was."

"There wasn't," I snapped. "Marty look at me." I waited until he lifted his head. He puffed out a breath and then set his jaw. "It was all a mistake," I told him. "That first test was a dud. There was never a baby."

He wouldn't say it. He swallowed again and looked like he was about to burst. I grasped his hand. "Say it, please. It doesn't matter what really happened. If you're right, then it's already too late. There's nothing you can do about it. And if you're wrong, then you're lying about her, and Principal Eggrow will accuse you of defamation too, except you won't get a suspension but jail time. So tell me there never was a baby. You have to believe this, OK?"

Marty rested his cheek against the wall and closed his eyes. "There was never a baby," he whispered. A tear trickled down his cheek and it was the last that fell. He opened his eyes and sat up, letting out a shaky breath. "I must've been mistaken."

That's when I wanted to cry. I got to my feet, unable to watch him. "Come on," I said, and briefly glanced down at him.

"Where?"

"Home," I said.

He shook his head.

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And I nodded mine. "Mom will get a ton of food stuffed down you, and you can get some rest. You need to tell them there's no baby, anyway."

"I will," he said. "Just not yet. Can't go home yet. I'm not even sober."

I held my hand down to him, offering to help him to his feet. "Then come to the kitchen. It can't be healthy to stay in this room. Someone should put a caution sign on the door. Beware of Contamination. I'll fix you something to eat." I smiled suddenly, thinking of Luke and the snack he'd shown me how to make. "I've got the perfect thing to feed you."

Finally, Marty let me help him to his feet. When we were both standing, he looked down at me. "Don't tell anyone what I said before. OK?"

I shook my head. "I won't."

Marty was quiet for a moment and then he said, "Let's get something to eat. What're you making?" I grinned, trying to put some cheer into the mood. "It's really good," I said, opening his door. "Luke gave me the recipe."

Marty pulled up short and I glanced back. I did a double take when I saw the horror on his face and stopped myself.

"What is it?"

He grabbed my arm roughly and jerked me back inside the room. "You need to stay away from him, Carrie." I rolled my eyes and he yanked on my arm again. "I'm serious." I shook free of his grip. "I can tell," I shot back and examined my arm for fingerprint marks.

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"What do you think you're doing with that type of guy?" I paused and carefully asked, "And what type is that?" But before he could answer, I went on, "Luke isn't the type you think he is. Besides, there's nothing going on between us." I shrugged. "Not technically, anyway."

"Not technically?" Marty shook his head. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know," I said, suddenly wondering myself what it meant. So far, we'd kissed twice. No, make that three times, since the kiss at school only hours ago. We'd discussed dating, yet only ended up fighting. We'd gone on two car rides alone into the country. And then there was that whole scene at school where he'd defended me to the principal. Technically, I had no idea what that made us. I glanced up at Marty. "Just don't worry about it, OK?" That's when Marty shook me. "Haven't you learned anything from what just happened to me? I'm begging you, stay away from him, Carrie. Those type of people are bad news"

I had this impulsive urge to defend Luke. Marty was unjustly classifying him—just as I'd done. But now I knew Luke better and I was completely gone for him. Still, I wasn't sure if there was anything there to stay away from. So I only nodded.

Marty hugged me briefly, tightly. "Thank you," he said. "I know you're not going to listen to me, but thanks for trying to make me feel better."

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Austin followed us into the kitchen when he saw us pass, and it just so happened they had all the supplies for Luke's after-school special. I had to make a bowlful for each guy. Just as I was putting the supplies away, two more boys rushed inside the house. E.T. was followed by his twelveyear-old brother, Trevor.

"There you are," E.T. said, when he saw me. "We've been looking for you all over town." Winded, he plopped down in a chair next to Austin.

"Why?" I said, stuffing the ice cream back into the freezer. E.T.'s eyes were bright. "Haven't you heard yet?"

"We even heard about it in the junior high," Trevor said, opening the freezer to take the ice cream back out. When he turned back, he blurted, "Did Luke Carter really kiss you right there in the hallway?"

E.T. shoved him toward the table and spun around to tell me his news. "Mr. Eggrow dropped your suspension."

"What?" I leaned against the counter, facing everyone.

"Why? What happened?"

"Luke went around, asking everyone where they'd heard the rumor. And he found out who started it." E.T.'s eyes gleamed. He loved knowing something that no one else knew.

"Well, who was it?" Marty demanded. E.T. slid my brother a nervous look and then said to me,

"Sidney Eggrow."

"Sidney?" I blinked. Abby's own sister had started it? I didn't know what to say.

"Mr. Eggrow sent her home when he found out. She said she didn't mean for everyone to know. She only told one 195

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friend." E.T. shrugged. "But you know how that goes. She overheard Abby telling her parents that she thought she was pregnant. And no one knew Sidney heard it so they didn't know to tell her it wasn't true. But Mr. Eggrow called an assembly for the whole school in the auditorium and explained it was all a big misunderstanding. That Sidney heard something she wasn't supposed to hear and no one knew to tell her it wasn't true because they didn't know she knew."

E.T. shook his head. "It was really confusing. But then Luke stood up and asked right there in front of everyone if Mr. Eggrow was going to apologize to you for accusing you of defamation."

My hand flew to my mouth. "He didn't." E.T. nodded and grinned. "He did. I called your house right after school. But your mom hadn't heard from you all day. She sounded real worried too because the school had already called twice to say you were suspended and then to say you could come back. She was pretty confused when I talked to her. By the way, she's looking for you right now too." I glanced at the clock on the wall. "Oh no. It's already four."

"You better get home," Marty said. I was halfway down Marty and Austin's front steps before I realized E.T. had followed me out.

"Hey," he said.

"What?" I turned back, impatiently staring up at him on the top step.

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He opened his mouth and then shut it. Then he glanced down the street.

"Come on," I said. "You're making me even later." He frowned down at me. "Are you going out with Luke Carter?"

It sounded odd to hear that spoken aloud by someone. Going out with Luke Carter? It just wasn't normal. But what was normal anymore?

I shrugged, and squinted up at E.T. "I don't know," I said.

"How can you not know?"

I tried to think up some way to explain it, but there really was no explanation unless I replayed the last few weeks and told him everything that had happened between Luke and me. And I didn't have time for that, so I just said, "It's complicated."

E.T. seemed to mull it over. Finally, he said, "I guess he's good enough for you."

Now that startled me.

I had no idea E.T. cared whether I dated anyone or not, or how they would treat me. He was the only friend I had at school. But we never really discussed personal things like feelings and that kind of junk. He was just the guy I always sat by and defended. It was touching to know he thought about me enough to worry about my life.

"You're not going to start ignoring me now that you've got a boyfriend, are you?"

I rolled my eyes. So much for the sweet E.T. who was only worried about me. "Shut up," I said. 197

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He grinned and lifted one shoulder. "I didn't think you would."

I sighed. "Does that ease your worries? Can I go now?"

"Yeah," he said. "You can go now."

"Thank you, your highness." I bowed down to him and when I straightened, stuck my tongue out before racing across the street.

"Bye," he called after me. I glanced back and waved. I ran the whole way home. It was four blocks and I was winded by the time I reached our yard. The sun was easing down below the horizon. I pulled up short when I spotted the white Mustang with black racing stripes parked out front. Luke.

I dashed the rest of the way to the front door and flung it open.

He sat on the loveseat with his knees spread wide and his hands hanging down between them. His head was lowered but he raised it when the door opened. He stood when he saw it was me filling the entrance. Dad had been in his chair with the footrest down. He didn't bother to stand at my arrival. Luke took a step in my direction. But then Mom appeared in the kitchen doorway.

She rushed past him, crying out. "Where...have you...been?" She crushed me into a hug and then said. "Don't you ever do that to me again, young lady." I pulled back. "I was at Marty's."

"The school called," she went on. "They started talking to me about your suspension and then they were saying it'd been dropped. I had no idea what was going on." 198

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I lowered my head, kicked at a patch of carpet. "I was at the library studying until about two thirty. Then I went to see Marty." I looked up. "There's no baby."

"There's no baby?" she echoed.

I nodded. "Abby's not pregnant. It was all a misunderstanding." My voice choked a little then. I thought of the expression on Marty's face when he'd insisted there had been. "But Mr. Eggrow thought I'd told everyone there was, and he got mad."

Mom moved back a step. Her face was a little pale. "She's not pregnant?"

I shook my head. And my mother backed even further away. Dad pushed to his feet then. When she turned away from me and disappeared down the hall toward her room, Luke came to me.

He couldn't take his gaze off me. "Are you OK?" he said. His eyes moved from my face to my arms as if he were searching for physical wounds.

I nodded. "I'm fine."

His searching blue eyes returned to mine. "You weren't earlier."

I slipped a hand in my pocket and my eyes fell as I remembered exactly how I'd been earlier. "I'm better." He said, "I guess you heard what happened," at the same moment I said, "E.T. told me what you did." I lifted my face and we shared a moment where no words had to be spoken. The simple contact of our gazes was enough. Softly, I said, "Thank you." 199

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He nodded once, and reached for my arm. But before he touched me, Dad's voice interrupted from behind us. Obviously, he'd been watching the whole scene.

"Carrie's still grounded."

Luke glanced over at him, a regretful—but almost defiant—

look still on his face, like he wanted to argue with my father.

"Now that she's made it home safe and sound, you should be going, Luke."

It was clear from his expression that Luke didn't agree. "I need to tell her something," he finally said to Dad. "May I very quickly tell her something?"

Dad seemed to seethe at Luke for being brave enough to stand up to him. Finally, he said, "You can tell her as she walks you to the door." He turned on his heel and followed Mom's path back to their room.

I turned to Luke. "I'm sorry," I said. "This house hasn't been the greatest place to be lately."

"Gee, I wonder why?" Luke said, trying to make me smile. When I didn't, he took my hand and we started making baby steps toward the door. When we finally reached it, we stopped and faced each other.

"I finished the poem," he whispered. I smiled. "Really?" I'd forgotten all about the poem, all about our Fourth of July Celebration in November. Just remembering that night boosted my spirits. Luke nodded. "It's not with me, so I can't show it to you now. But it's done. I wanted you to know that." He glanced up at the ceiling and then to me. "I tried to show it to you on Thanksgiving Day, but..."

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I nodded. "Yeah."

He moved closer to me. "I want to kiss you," he whispered.

My eyelids fluttered and I swayed toward him. Was it possible to have this strong of a pull toward another human being?

I managed to shake my head. "Bad idea."

"I know." He did dare to reach up and lightly move the back of his index finger over my cheekbone, though. "But I thought you'd still like to know."

He was right. I did like knowing.

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