Текст книги "Just Me"

Автор книги: L.A. Fiore

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Текущая страница: 13 (всего у книги 19 страниц)

Chapter Fourteen

News spread quickly about our engagement and at school girls weren't shy about wanting to see my ring. I found myself looking at it almost as much as they all did. I couldn't believe I was engaged. Yes, we were young and, yes, we agreed with the Wrights about waiting, but to have taken that step with him felt perfectly right.

On an unpleasant note, Brad had been released on his own recognizance. He wasn't allowed to come to school, but he was home and not behind bars. As Mica had predicted, other girls did step forward. I didn't believe it at first. I couldn't believe the same boy who had joked with Bastian and me during my time as Victory was actually a serial rapist. There were six others, and two of them had not been lucky enough to escape Brad’s unwanted full attention. They, like all of us, had been at a party and there had been drinking. When he raped them, they were too afraid and ashamed to say anything. They expressed the same self-doubt I had felt: the worry that they somehow had encouraged him. But with the added element of the alcohol, they feared people would say it hadn't been rape, just guilt after the fact.

There was a positive to the ordeal and that was the knowledge that each of us had people in our lives who were standing behind us and helping us through it. I couldn't imagine going through such a horrific experience and having to deal with it on my own. Or even worse having someone like my aunt, filling my head with bullshit and doubt. How badly would someone spiral out of control if they had no one to turn to, no one to tell them that it wasn't their fault? I couldn't help but think about my mom and what could have likely caused her downward spiral.

The upside of Brad being released was that his trial approached. I overheard the Wrights talking one night and Mr. Wright believed there was someone with a lot of influence pushing for the trial since it was unusual for Brad's case to already be on the docket. Mr. Wright didn't volunteer who he thought this person was, but I knew what it was he wasn't saying, he thought it was my father again. I didn't understand why the man was making himself visible in my life now when he had stayed safe in the shadows for the past eighteen years. His name wasn't even on my birth certificate, which I always assumed was because my mom hadn't known which one of her many gentlemen callers was my father. The whole situation pissed me off.

***

Winter was quickly giving way to spring, which meant I was going to be leaving soon for Maine, but first I needed to take my exams. Studying filled up most of my afternoons and evenings and after one particularly difficult study session, I needed a break. Bastian was outside cutting up a tree that had fallen during one of the ice storms. I never thought watching someone using a chainsaw would be sexy, but with the way Bastian's muscles bunch and corded from his efforts, I was wrong.

He must have sensed me because he shut off the saw and turned in my direction. “Hey. How's the studying going?”

“My brain's fried. I need a break.” I couldn't help running my fingers over his arms and when I felt how tight his muscles were from the work he'd been doing, that pleasant feeling stirred in my gut. “How'd you do it?”

Clearly he was distracted because his focus was on my hand. I liked that my touch did to him what his did to me. His teal eyes shifted to mine. “Don't start something you can't finish.”

You guessed it, my knees went weak. He looked smug, probably because he turned the scales and knocked me off-balance. “How did I do what?” Yep, definitely smug.

“Take your exams so early with minimal studying and ace them?”

Cockiness replaced smugness. “Cause I'm the man.”

“Oh my God, you're such a dork.”

My feet were no longer touching the ground as I found myself up and over his shoulder. “I'll show you dork.”

Despite the fact that it was a threat, my body started to burn. He walked us into the woods that surrounded the Wrights property before he dropped me to my feet and pressed me back against a tree. I was so ready to taste him, to have his mouth covering mine, so I was bit surprised when his expression turned serious.

“I would really like to go with you to Maine.”

My first reaction was yes, but would I focus as well as I should if he was there?

“I'm not sure that's a great idea. Besides, what about your apprenticeship?”

“I'll come to help you get settled, and then I'll leave for Concord. We don't know these people, and I'm sure it's all good, but this requirement of you having to move up there is a bit left of center. I spoke to the Wrights about it, and they agree with me. If for no one else, do it for us and our peace of mind so we aren't wondering what you're walking into when you get there.”

“Okay. I'll send an email to Logan Dupree and let him know you'll be with me in the beginning.”

He exhaled in relief and I realized if I had said no, despite his words, he would have honored that. The pleasant feeling in my gut spread through my entire body. “What will you do during those weeks?” I asked.

“Grabbing a chair and spending every day looking at you isn't an option?”

“You'd grow bored.”

“Never, but I suppose I could look into work, something temporary.” And then his expression turned playful. “Now, about calling me a dork.” By the time he stopped kissing me, I made a mental note to call him a dork at least six times a day.

***

As predicted by Mr. Wright, Brad's case was brought to trial mere weeks after he was released. All eight of us were scheduled to testify. I followed the proceedings and seeing Brad looking so normal and harmless, knowing that the heart of a predator beat in his chest, terrified me. I had always believed I was a good judge of character, but I had to reconsider that now. What was even scarier was that his father seemed angrier at the fact that his son had been caught than the actual crime he was being tried for. My conversation with my uncle flashed into my head. Brad's father had been abusive and it was more than likely that whatever molded his father's views had been trained into the son. I felt sorry for Brad. It seemed to me if anyone deserved to be standing trial, it should be Bradley Senior since Junior never stood a chance.

The day I was scheduled to testify, I was a nervous wreck. I had never been in a courtroom, so I didn't know what to expect even though the lawyers had been really great with preparing me for the experience.

It looked like the countless courtrooms I'd seen on television: a rather large room with wood paneling along the Judge's bench and the witness stand, the small wooden swing-door that separated the judge and counselors from those who had come to watch the proceedings and behind the judge a brass emblem hung depicting the scales of justice.

Brad sat right in the front. I felt like I was doing the walk of shame as I made my way to the witness stand and got sworn in.

The prosecutor started—the questions were all ones we had rehearsed. My voice wasn't exactly steady but it seemed clear and loud. When the state rested, Brad's attorney started his cross. I had been dreading the cross-examination, since so often in television the victim was put on trial. There were a few shady questions, ones aimed at trying to discredit me, but all in all, it went as expected. I wasn't in the court room for more than twenty minutes before the judge dismissed me.

Walking out of the courtroom, I glanced at Brad, but he didn't look at me. He had his head lowered. Maybe if he had a different father or a mother who had been able to seek help for him, could all of this have been avoided? Mica was right, Brad needed to be held accountable, but there was a part of me that wondered how much of his attitude had been fostered by his father's own attitude and his mother's neglect.

About a week after I testified, Brad was found guilty and sentenced to three to five years. He'd probably be out in a year, but his actions were going to follow him for the rest of his life.

Chapter Fifteen

Dear Mr. Dupree,

My name is Larkspur O'Bannion and I wanted to thank you, first, for the scholarship and the wonderful opportunity to study with you.

I am in awe of your use of color, but your depth perception is even more phenomenal. Some of your works look more like snapshots than something created with paint and brush. That is an area I need to work on. I also read you work in clay and glass and I would love to watch you, since I have very little experience in sculpting work.

Ms. Whitney forwarded my itinerary to me and I will be on your doorstep early evening April 25 ^th . My fiancé, Sebastian, will be accompanying me and staying for a few weeks to help me get settled before he leaves for an apprenticeship in Concord, MA.

He's looking for work while in Harrington, either restoration work or construction. If you know of anything or could point me in the right direction, that would be most appreciated.

I look forward to meeting you and your family, Mr. Dupree, and getting the chance to learn from you.

Sincerely,

Lark

I didn't expect a return email so quickly, but while I worked on my homework my laptop buzzed with an incoming message.

Lark,

I disagree with your opinion on your perception. Your work is inspired.

My wife, Saffron, owns a house right on Harrington Bay and we’ll put you up there. We live two miles away. She will be contacting you shortly. ; )

I'm not thrilled with you living there alone, though Harrington is very safe, so if there are no objections with you we'd like for Reaper, our German shepherd, to stay with you. He's a great companion and an excellent guard dog.

Regarding your fiancé, my brother Broderick is restoring a house right here in Harrington and he is always looking for more hands. If you forward me Sebastian's email address, I will send it along to Broderick.

My family and I are very much looking forward to meeting you, Lark. Please drive safely and we will see you early evening, April 25.

Logan

I sat there for a few minutes re-reading Logan's message. A knock came at my door. “Come see this,” I said to Bastian as he entered.

He stopped just behind me to read from over my shoulder. “He sounds like a good guy.”

“So, I'll forward your email onto him?”

“Yeah, please.”

I did so before logging off. I had final exams tomorrow and Friday and after, I had a week's break before Bastian and I took off for Maine.

“Are you ready for your exams?”

“Yeah, more ready for the whole week we'll have together after.”

The words had barely passed my lips when Bastian pulled me to my feet and kissed me, full on the mouth. He gripped my hips and pressed me up against him. Reaching for his shirt, I lifted it up to expose his magnificent abs and chest. I tossed the tee behind me and ran my hands over the hard muscles of his stomach.

“No one's home Bastian,” I whispered before brushing my lips over his dragon tattoo.

He growled as he lifted me into his arms. He dropped me onto the bed before he walked to the door and flipped the lock. Seeing him, his hard, muscled body in all of its inked beauty had my heart pounding nearly out of my chest because my mind was already thinking about all the fabulous things this boy was going to do to me. He pounced, covering my body with his own.

“You look a bit wicked, Lark, what are you thinking about?”

“How much I want you inside me.”

Speaking of wicked, the look he gave me in response literally had my toes curling. He said not a word as his touch moved up my stomach, his lips following the trail of his hand. When his mouth settled over mine, I lost all ability for rational thought and just went with instinct.

My tongue ran along his lower lip before I dipped it into his mouth as my hips lifted and I rubbed myself against him. He worked my shirt up over my head and I had just a moment to enjoy the wild look of him before his mouth closed over my breast through the silk of my bra. He popped my other breast free and rolled the nipple between his fingers. His dark head lowered, spreading kisses over my ribs and stomach before he reached for my jeans and pulled them down my body. His tongue dipped below the waistband of my panties as he gripped the silk and drew them from me too.

He stood at the foot of the bed to yank his jeans off and it was a sight I knew I would never grow tired of seeing. I reached for the condom and moved to just in front of him. Steadily, I rolled it onto the hard length of him. He grinned before his arm wrapped around my waist and his mouth covered mine. In the next minute, I was flat on my back and he was settled between my thighs. He pushed into me just as his tongue plunged into my mouth, mirroring the movement of his hips. I felt myself coming apart and wrapped my legs around him, urging him to go deeper. I came hard. A few more thrusts and he came too, my name ripping from his throat as he did.

***

Two days later my exams were over. The moment felt bittersweet, because though I didn't love school, it was sad and strange to be leaving that part of my childhood behind.

Bastian was on an errand, so I was home alone watching a movie when I heard a knock at the door. It took me a minute to process the fact that Aunt Kim stood on the front stoop of the Wrights' home.

“Larkspur, could I come in for a minute?”

My gut said to close and lock the door, but I stepped back and held the door open for her to enter. We settled in the living room and I reached for the remote and paused the movie. It was difficult making eye contact, because frankly she freaked me out. Somehow I managed to ask, “Is there something wrong?”

“I know we have never seen eye-to-eye, but I came here because it means a lot to your uncle that we attempt to get along.”

If by “not seen eye-to-eye,” she meant she'd been a vindictive jealous bitch to me for most of my life then, yes, I could agree with her statement.

She didn't seem to pick up on my annoyance as she continued on, “Your uncle remembers Dylan differently than I. She was my sister and I loved her, but she was a hard person to like. She was very selfish. People adored her because of how she looked, but if they scratched the surface they would have seen her beauty only ran skin deep. Eddie was mine. Dylan knew how I felt about him and she purposely took him from me. I had to watch as the man I loved fell head over heels for my own sister. Can you imagine how painful that was for me? She didn't care how much she was hurting me and as it turned out, her love for him was as fickle as her love for me when she up and left him.”

Despite myself, I found I actually felt sympathetic toward my aunt, because I couldn't imagine having a sister who deliberately stole Bastian from me. I knew my mother was selfish; I had firsthand experience of that, but I didn't think she was capable of such out and out cruelty. My mouth opened before I truly knew what I intended to say. “I'm sorry, Aunt Kim, that was really pretty awful of her.”

When she looked at me, there was a bit of wildness in her stare. “It all worked out, but maybe now you understand why I treated you as I did, when you came to live with us. How could I feel anything but contempt when just looking at you I see so much of her?”

Well, I didn't agree with that. I may look like my mother, but I wasn't her. Why should the child pay for the sins of the parent?

“I could never love you and I know that sounds harsh, but it's the simple truth. I had lived for so long in the shadow of my sister. Finally she died and I got all I wanted. But it didn't last because then you came, and once again my sister had planted herself quite firmly between me and what I wanted most. It was her last act of selfishness—sending you to me—as if she hadn't hurt me enough.”

She stood so abruptly, I almost pulled a muscle in my neck following her. “I came to see you at the request of your uncle. Perhaps you will call him and let him know you understand where I'm coming from. He lives in a fantasy world, where everyone gets along, but you and I both know life rarely works that way. Sometimes blood isn't thicker than water.”

She turned then and reached for my hand, holding it almost painfully in both of hers. “You will make it right with your uncle. He's my life, as are the girls. It's in your power to make this all go away. So prove you aren't like your mother and do the right thing.”

Before I could reply, she walked out the door. I just stood there for a few minutes, because I really didn't completely understand what just happened. Yes, I heard my aunt's words, but there was something about her entire speech which left an unpleasant taste in my mouth. For someone who claimed my mother was selfish, a fact I knew all too well, I heard an awful lot of me, me, me in Aunt Kim's spiel. Not to mention her comment about my mom dying and her finally getting everything she always wanted was seriously messed up.

I walked back into the living room, but couldn't watch the movie with the knot in my stomach, so I reached for my cell and called my uncle.

“Lark, what a nice a surprise.”

“Hi, Uncle Eddie. Do you have a minute?”

“Sure. Is everything okay?” There was a note of worry in his tone.

“Yeah, it's just that Aunt Kim was here.”

“She was?”

“Yeah. She explained to me about my mom, and I guess she was hoping by sharing with me I would understand her better, or more to the point, understand why she isn't a fan of mine.”

“What did she tell you?” There was no mistaking the anger in his voice.

I relayed the conversation and was completely shocked to hear the curse that hissed across the line.

“She shouldn't have burdened you with our shit. We had a long talk last night and I guess she thought if she could get you to understand, all would be okay between us, but we're way past that.”

I heard him exhale. “I'm sorry she came to see you and filled your head with impressions of your mother that are simply untrue. I was never in love with your aunt when we were younger, though I knew she had feelings for me. Perhaps it was unfair of me to marry Dylan's sister after she left knowing that a part of me would always belong to her, but you were an innocent child and should have been loved despite whatever happened in our love triangle. Your aunt's behavior toward you is wrong and she needs to acknowledge that. As far as your mother, she was a good person: kind, fair, selfless, but somewhere along the way she just lost herself. You may never have seen the good part of her, but I promise you it was there.”

He went silent for a minute. Then he added, “As for your aunt, we're separating. I don't want you to worry or feel responsible. It's something I've been thinking about doing for a very long time. My actions are not because of you, so please don't think that they are, despite what your aunt told you. Our problems are between us—you are just collateral damage. For that I'm very sorry.”

He sounded so sad, but resigned too. “I'm so sorry, Uncle Eddie.”

“I'm doing what I should have done a long time ago, Lark. I don't regret my life with Kim because I got the girls, but we've not been working for a really long time.” A wave of fear swept through me in response to his words—I really did believe the only thing that tethered my aunt to sanity was her family. I was afraid of how badly she would spiral out of control without Uncle Eddie and the girls to keep her grounded, but I kept my worries to myself.

“Please don't worry about it, okay?” He said.

Easier said than done. “Okay.”

“So, to change the subject—how were finals?”

A half an hour later I hung up with my uncle just as Bastian came home. He dropped down on the sofa next to me and pressed a kiss on my mouth, “Who was on the phone?”

“My uncle.”

“Yeah, how's he doing?”

I didn't really want to get into it because the whole situation made me feel sick, so I was purposely vague in answering. I then changed the subject, “So what have you been up to?”

He linked his fingers behind his head and stretched his legs out in front of him. “Had to do something.”

I turned more fully around to face him, “What exactly?”

His response was to grin so I slapped him in the chest and he winced.

“I didn't hit you that hard.” I touched his chest just over his heart and felt the bandage. My eyes flew to his when I realized what he'd been up to.

“What's that?” I asked innocently, but my whole body tensed in anticipation.

“Look and see.”

And so I did, lifting his shirt over his head before reaching for the bandage. When I saw the beauty and simplicity of my name over his heart in emerald-colored ink, there weren't words to describe how the sight made me feel. But it was very easy to express how I felt about the tattoo. “I love it.”

He pulled me into his arms. I added, “You beat me to it.”

“What?”

I had been working on a design since I moved into the apartment with Bastian. Some would argue it was stupid to get a tattoo for the one you loved, because what if it didn't last? I understood that, agreed with it actually, but I had no doubts that Bastian and I were going to last and frankly I wanted his name on me, wanted him to see his name on me. The fact that he was thinking the same thing only reinforced the rightness of both of our actions. Unlike Bastian, this was my first tattoo so it took me this long to work up the nerve to actually make the appointment. “I was going tomorrow to have a tattoo done.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah.” I stood and walked over to my backpack to retrieve the design I had settled on. I sat back down and handed him the sketch. It was the Celtic trinity knot and embedded within it was a red heart. Bastian's name was worked into the design. He studied it for a minute and when his gaze turned to me, his expression mirrored how I felt at seeing my name on him. He asked, “You're going tomorrow?”

“Yeah, to your friend Connor.”

“So that's what he was alluding to. I'm coming with you.”

“I'd like that.”

My eyes traveled to my name resting over his heart and I felt all kinds of things, the strongest of which was desire. I straddled him, and he immediately curled his fingers into my hips, just before my lips found his neck. “Is it wrong for me to want to spend the rest of the day just looking at you? I want my hands all over you. I want to kiss you, taste you...” His eyes blazed when I looked back at him “…love you.”

His mouth covered mine as his tongue swept my mouth to tangle with my own. His breathing turned hard and fast as he pulled his hands through my hair. He pressed his mouth to my neck and his tongue licked a trail down to my shoulder. “Yeah, let's do your idea. The house is empty, yes?” He said in a voice that was low, husky and sexy as hell.

“Yep.”

In a blur of movement, he had me up over his shoulder seconds before he headed for the stairs. He was acting like a caveman, but then, knowing exactly where we were going and what we were going to do, I really didn't have a problem with his methods.

“Move faster, handsome.”

And he did until it was time to move slower and then he took his good, sweet time.

***

The Wrights were both working late, so Bastian suggested going to Alfonso's for dinner. Poppy and Caden joined us and as soon as we settled, Mr. Alfonso came over to take our order personally.

I stood to give him a hug.

“It's good to see you. How have you been?” He asked.

“Good. I'm heading off to New England soon for that scholarship I told you about. I'm really excited about it. How are you?”

He knew I was asking about the Rosses, and his jaw tightened. “Things have settled. Whatever you want, it's on the house. No arguments.”

It was on the tip of my tongue to argue with his generous offer. “Thanks.”

We settled on a pizza with everything on it, for Poppy and me, and one with every kind of meat for the guys. We hadn't been there for more than ten minutes when Poppy and Caden started bickering.

“Could you stop kicking the table?” I had never heard that tone from Poppy. She sounded so much like Dr. Wright when she struggled for patience.

Caden's reaction to her was just as bizarre; he mocked her like a kid would do. Intentionally goading her to get a rise out of her. What the hell?

“You're such a child,” she said.

“And you’re an old woman.”

“I'm younger than you, so that's a stupid comeback.” The look Poppy threw Caden should have smote him where he sat, but he held her stare with one of his own.

“You're stupid.”

Their exchange was comical in its childishness, but I could see it was heading for disaster and fast. “Are you still working on that sweet Corvette, Caden?”

It took him a minute to stop glaring at Poppy and answer me. I only half-listened, because I was curious as hell as to what was going on with these two.

***

The following day Bastian went off in search of a trailer that we could hitch to the back of Baby, yes, I named my car after Dean Winchester's car, so we could bring his bike up North. Though it was Saturday, everybody was working but Poppy, so the two of us sat out back on the patio.

I had gotten my tattoo earlier and though it had hurt, it hadn't been as painful as I had feared. The look on Bastian's face when he saw it, his name on me, well, it was a look I'd remember forever.

I turned my thoughts to Poppy and Caden and their behavior at dinner the night before, hell, their behavior since Caden moved into the Wrights’ house. I worried because they both meant so much to me and I hated that they didn't get along. I had thought perhaps it was just flirting, but after last night, I wasn't so sure.

“Why are you and Caden going at each other all the time?”

When she looked over at me, I was surprised to see guilt in her expression. “I like him.”

“Well, I'm relieved to hear that, because the thought of you two not getting along really upsets me.”

“No, I mean I really like him.”

“Huh?”

“I know probably not a great idea, but I can't help it. An electric shock burned right through me the first time we shook hands. I haven't been able to get my reaction to him out of my head. It's what had me questioning my relationship with Shawn. How could I be so deeply in love with Shawn and have such a strong reaction to someone else?”

“We can't help who we like, Poppy.”

“I know.” She reached over and touched my ring. “I like seeing you wearing his ring. So much for no happily-ever-after for you.”

“I don't want a happily-ever-after. That implies smooth sailing and princes rescuing damsels. Me, I want the bumps in the road and the challenges.”

She fell silent for a moment as she worked her lower lip and when she did speak, her voice sounded very soft. “Lark, what would you think about Caden and me giving it a shot?”

“The idea of you and Caden finding what Bastian and I have makes me deliriously happy, because we'll all be together, always, one big happy family. I want that for you and Caden. I want him in our family. I want us all to be close always. With that being said, if it doesn't work between you, it's going to be awkward. You're my best friend and Caden is Bastian's which will make things rather uncomfortable.”

I could tell she was mulling it over. I knew her so well that I knew she'd back off with Caden rather than risk screwing anything up, but then if Caden was her Bastian, I didn't want her to miss out on that.

“Go for it, Poppy.”

“Wait, what?”

“Yeah, you owe it to yourself and Caden to see where it could lead. He could be your Bastian.”

Poppy didn't reply with words, but I saw her answer when her eyes lit up.

***

Later in the day while I packed, I replayed the conversation with Poppy in my head. I wanted her and Caden to work; I wanted them both to find what Bastian and I had.

I looked over at him as we packed up my room. He stood near my workstation individually bubble-wrapping my pots of paint. I stopped what I was doing to just watch him.

He wore those faded jeans I loved so much, so worn they almost looked white in spots, and an Aerosmith tee. The images on his arms looked as if they were dancing along his skin as his muscles flexed from his efforts. His hair was pulled back with a blue bandana and his face in profile was set in determination as he focused on his task.

Quite unexpectedly, he asked, “Hey, Lark, how's your happy place?” He glanced over at me when he asked this. “What?” His smile cut the sharpness in his tone.

“I like looking at you.”

He placed the pot down and walked to me in that loose-limbed stride of his. “I like you looking.”

“My happy place is just overflowing.”

He bent down so that our eyes were level. “I am so glad to hear that.”

And then he was kissing me.

***

“What do you want to do tonight, Lark?” Poppy asked as we sat on the sofa watching a repeat of Game of Thrones.

“I don't know.” It was my last weekend home and everyone but Bastian and Poppy had to work.

“You're disappointed aren't you?” She asked.

“I was really hoping to spend the weekend with everyone. I know that's kind of selfish.”

“That's not selfish, Lark,” Poppy said with a smile.

“Why don't we go to that Italian place you've been wanting to try? Isn’t that the one that Mr. Alfonso’s cousin opened?” Bastian asked before he draped his arm over my shoulders and kissed my head.

I forgot Mr. Alfonso had mentioned that. “Yeah, I can drown my disappointment in pasta and cheese.”

On the way to Lombardi's, I couldn’t shake the melancholy. Though good food always made me feel better, I was conflicted about my move to Maine. I wasn't going to be gone for that long and, thankfully, Bastian was coming with me, but this move felt like my first step into adulthood, and that was scary.

We opened the door to the restaurant with Poppy acting edgy. That should have been my clue that something was up. As soon as we walked inside, my feet just stopped moving. A banner hung from the ceiling: Congratulations, Lark. We'll Miss You, and a huge cake sat on one of the tables. But it was the people, everyone I wanted to see, all standing around staring at me that had those blasted tears leaking from my eyes.

I walked to the Wrights and wrapped my arms around both of them. “Thank you.” I whispered through my tears.