Текст книги "AIDEEN"

Автор книги: L.A. Casey

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Текущая страница: 6 (всего у книги 8 страниц)

We had no clue where they were and all sorts of horrible things ran through my mind. Things like what if Big Phil somehow had him?

I tried not to think about it as the contractions came faster, and lasted longer. The entire time Branna was monitoring the baby’s heartbeat, which always remained strong and steady like it was supposed to. She checked to see how far along I was dilated every thirty minutes to an hour, and during the last hour I went from five centimetres to ten. The brothers had set up the birthing pool Kane and I purchased weeks ago, in our bedroom, and Branna lit some candles and played soft, instrumental music.

It really helped me relax, or relax as much as could.

I was in the middle of pulling my nightie off my body and fanning myself as heat attacked every inch of my body. I was naked from the waist down, but I didn’t care. I had a comfortable sports bra on, but nothing else.

I was too far gone with pain to even consider the brothers being uncomfortable. I didn’t care about them or anyone else; I just cared about myself and my own comfort.

“Fuck, fuck, fuucccckkkk,” I all but snarled as I bent forward and placed my hands on my bed. I swayed from side to side and tried to focus on the music instead of the pain that stabbed me.

“Branna,” I said in a very calm voice when the urge to get this baby out of my body occurred. “I need to push. I need to push right now.”

Branna and the lads lead me to the birthing pool.

“This is very different than what I imagined seeing Aideen’s private parts would be like,” Alec murmured from behind me as I eased myself down into the birthing pool.

Nico choked on air. “You imagined that? Bro, she is our brother’s girl. The mother to our niece or nephew.”

I looked up at them when I was settled on my knees and leaning on the pool’s side.

Alec blinked. “I’ve imagined it since I first met her... should I be sorry about that? Because I’m not.”

Nico shook his head. “I’m telling Kane you said that.”

“You’ve always been a little snitch bitch!” Alec hissed.

“Time and place, bro,” Damien grumbled. “Time and place.”

I wanted to laugh at them; they sounded like arguing little boys, but I couldn’t because all I could focus on was the pain that consumed me.

“Kane!” I cried as a mighty contraction tore through me. “Oh, please. I need him.”

“Death!” Alec hissed. “That is what he has asked for by not answering his fucking phone!”

Nico nodded in agreement then reached for my hand and grabbed ahold of it.

“He will be here, Ado.”

“When?” I screamed and squeezed Nico’s hand when the pain I felt intensified. “I’m goin’ to fuckin’ kill him if he isn’t already dead or worse.”

Nico’s face turned red and his eyes almost bugged out of their sockets.

“Ow,” he whimpered. “Ow. Ow. That hurts.”

I let go of his hands and focused on Alec laughing at Nico as he shook out his hand and cradled it against his chest.

“I can’t do this,” I panted.

Branna looked up and locked her eyes on mine. “Babe, a few more minutes and you’ll be a mammy. You got this.”

I didn’t have anything.

I couldn’t fucking do it.

“Make it stop,” I screamed as burning filled my vagina. “Help it stop. Damien!”

“Oh Christ,” he whispered and scrambled closer to me, but full blown panic came over him and he could do nothing but move to the side and rub my hand.

Alec took his place in front of me.

“Take her mind off of it,” Nico whispered to him, but had his eyes locked between my legs.

The way I was positioned was not ladylike at all.

“Sons of Anarchy!” Alec suddenly shouted. “I’ll put on the show and you can-”

“Shut. Up,” I growled as I stared at him. “And don’t move a bloody muscle. You’re me focus point.”

He began to panic and started to sing, “I love you, you love me. We’re a happy family-”

“Alec!” Nico snapped. “Barney songs? Really?”

Alec placed his hands on the side of his head and he whimpered, “I don’t know what to do!”

“Just do what Aideen asks,” Branna said in a calm voice as she dabbed a cool damp cloth over my forehead.

Alec looked at Branna then to me then to Nico. “I take it back. I don’t want babies, not ever.”

“Bronagh is already pregnant,” Dominic cried into his hands. “It’s too late to pull out.”

“I’m never ever having sex ever again,” Damien whispered.

For God’s sake.

“Stop pushing?” Alec then suggested. “Squeeze your cheeks together and keep that little Slater up there until Kane gets here.”

Branna and Nico looked at Alec who was demonstrating to me what I had to do with my arse cheeks. I didn’t want to copy him because he looked constipated and it freaked me out.

“It doesn’t work like that, Alec,” Branna said then refocused on me and smiled. “Honey, you’re doing beautifully.”

“She can’t do beautifully because Kane isn’t here!” Alec stated for a second time. “He needs to be here for this.”

Branna laughed. “Tell the baby that.”

Alec did just that. The bloody freak of nature kneeled down next to the pool, cupped his hands at the sides of his mouth and shouted, “Stop your journey down the vaginal canal, we’re not ready for you yet. Your daddy is at the gym pumping iron, have some respect and wait for him!”

Dominic pulled Alec away from my most private body part and smacked him on the nose. “Stop it.”

Alec jumped with fright and silently lifted his fingers to his nose while he stared at his brother with wide eyes.

“I can’t believe you just did that to me.”

Nico shook his head, chewing on his inner cheek probably so he wouldn’t smile. Branna rubbed Alec’s shoulder, smiling before she looked back to me and winked.

“Aideen?!”

Oh, thank God.

Branna smiled wide. “In the bedroom!”

Seconds passed by, then Kane and Ryder burst into the bedroom. I didn’t look up. Instead, I lowered my head and screamed as pain swam around my abdomen.

“Strip down and get into the pool with her, she needs you,” Branna ordered Kane.

“Where the fuck have you been?” I screamed as I pushed.

I ignored everything and picked up the two balls Branna had given me earlier and continued to squeeze and release them in my hands, focusing all the pain I felt into the objects.

And breathing, I really needed to remember my breathing.

I heard mindless chatter and sounds of items hitting my bedroom floor, then I heard water splashing, as ripples of water knocked against me.

Kane was in the pool.

I felt a hand pressed against my back, then multiple kisses to my shoulder.

“I’m here, babydoll.”

I began to cry, the relief of having him here hit me like a bomb. I was terrified he would miss the baby being born.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered and kissed the side of my head. “I’m so sorry.”

I turned my head to him, pressing it to the side of his face. “I can’t do this.”

Kane smiled. “What are you talking about? You’re doing it, and you’re doing it fucking awesomely.”

“Hell yeah she is,” Branna agreed.

Kane interlocked his hands with mine and didn’t make a sound when I squeezed him with every ounce of energy I had.

“God, it hurts!” I cried out and held our conjoined hands under my stomach.

“Spread your legs as wide as you can, honey, and as soon as you get another contraction you bear down and push, okay?”

I nodded to Branna and gripped Kane’s hands as Branna instructed me to move our affixed hands under my thighs as I pushed. It didn’t take long for a contraction to hit, and when it did, I did what Branna had said and I pushed. Contractions were painful and just utterly horrid, but pushing?

Pushing. Hurt. Like. Hell.

I screamed as loud as I ever had in my life when burning ripped through my vagina. “Ahhhhhhh!” I roared until my contraction faded, but even then the burning lingered.

“Branna,” I cried and squeezed my eyes shut. “It’s burnin’.”

I felt the cloth against my head.

“Push through that sting, do you hear me? You push through it with everythin’ you’ve got.”

I did just that. For thirty more minutes I pushed like hell through the burning sting until I thought I would collapse from exhaustion.

“She’s crownin’, that means the head is almost out, Kane,” Branna whispered. “You’re about to deliver your baby.”

Fear struck me.

“Branna, help him,” I pleaded, terrified Kane might let the baby fall by mistake.

“I’m ready,” he breathed. “I’ve got this, babydoll, trust me. Push as hard as you can one more time.”

Ryder and his brothers hunkered down in front of me and they each grabbed my hands, arms and legs, letting me use them as leverage.

“Let’s do this, Ado.” Alec smiled.

I nodded my head, then I sucked in a huge breath and with all my might, I bore down and pushed like my life depended on it.

“Good girl, babydoll,” Kane cheered. “Keep pushing... keep pushing.”

“The head is fully out,” Branna whooped a few seconds later.

More burning pain flooded my vagina and I screamed, but quickly inhaled and exhaled through the pain.

Nico moved to the side to get a better view and laughed. “Nothing but dark hair, a true Slater.” He tried to high five Damien who pointed at his own mop of white hair causing Nico to wince and say, “My bad, bro.”

I screamed loudly once more as increasing pressure mounted at my entrance, intensifying the burning.

Kane was laughing as he said, “Shoulders are out... chest... torso... butt... legs... and toes. You did it, baby.”

I slumped forward as I felt the baby leave me.

“It’s a... boy!” Kane suddenly announced. “It’s definitely a boy.”

I gasped and tried to look down between my legs, but the water was clouded with blood. “Are you sure?”

Branna carefully sat me back and leaned over into the pool and lifted my leg so Kane could wind the umbilical cord under so I didn’t hurt myself or the baby. I turned my head and burst into tears as I looked at Kane who had our baby scooped up in his big arms. I was smiling and weeping until I noticed something.

The baby wasn’t crying.

“Branna,” I said. “Why isn’t he cryin’?”

“It’s normal, give him a second,” Branna said then reached over and took the baby from Kane without asking.

He still wasn’t crying.

Five-seconds of nothing passed and it felt like a lifetime.

“Oh, please,” I screamed as panic struck. “Please make him cry.”

Kane grabbed hold of my shoulders as I tried to stand up. I shoved him away from me and tried to make it closer to Branna. She couldn’t move very far because the baby’s umbilical cord was still attached to me.

“Come on, baby boy,” Branna cooed to the baby as she rubbed him roughly with one of our baby towels. She continued this while I wailed and Kane hugged me from behind.

Alec had his hands on either side of his head, Nico and Damien were both chewing on their nails, and Ryder was just staring at the baby and Branna.

Time was frozen until... magic.

The loudest wail you could imagine from a newborn filled my apartment, and it was the best sound I had ever heard in my entire life.

I cried harder with relief that the baby was alive, and Kane, who was shaking behind me, whimpered lightly and pressed his face into the back of my hair.

“You little brat,” Branna tearfully laughed as she finished wiping the baby’s face. “Givin’ your mammy and daddy a fright like that.”

“Your fuckin’ uncles, too,” Alec stated and bent forward, placing his hands on his knees, panting like he just ran a marathon.

Branna moved over to us and leaned down. She lowered her arms, and gently rested the baby onto my chest. I scanned my eyes over the baby until my eyes rested in between his legs.

“It is a boy,” I cried with happiness. “We have a son.”

Kane wrapped his arms around us and kissed the side of my face. “Thank you so much, baby.”

“For what?” I sniffled, looking back to him.

“For giving him to me,” he said and kissed my lips.

I cried with happiness and looked back down to my son who started to cry, loudly. “Shhh,” I cooed and gently rocked him. “Mammy’s got you.”

My heart burst with love in that moment.

I was someone’s mother.

“He looks just like you, Kane,” Branna commented through her soft crying.

“No way,” he murmured, his eyes locked on our child’s face. “He’s beautiful, that’s all Aideen.”

I smiled with glee, and let my eyes roam over my son’s face. He had a cute button nose, real chubby cheeks, a head full of dark brown hair and plump pink lips. I lifted him up and leaned my mouth down to his head and I kissed him.

“I love you,” I whispered. “I love you so much, baby boy.”

Kane repositioned himself behind me. He put his legs on either side of my hips and pulled me and our baby back into his chest. He leaned his head into the side of mine and we both stared down at out little angel.

“I can’t believe we made him,” I murmured. “He is perfect.”

“He is,” Kane agreed.

Branna reached down and gently pressed on my breast and the baby gurgled then hummed as he relaxed even more against me. I closed my eyes as she moved to her bag and took some objects out. I felt her come back over and lean over me and the baby, but I only opened my eyes when she spoke to Kane.

“Cut between the clamp and my fingers.”

I opened my eyes and saw Branna handing Kane a funny shaped pair of scissors and then glanced down to the baby’s umbilical cord. What I can only describe as a white peg was clamped near the baby’s belly button and Branna was directing Kane where to cut.

Kane did as told and cut through our son’s umbilical cord. It took a few cuts, but he cut it off and handed Branna back her scissors.

“You might want to claw my eyes out, but can I have him for a few minutes? I’ll dry him off and wrap him up nice and warm.”

I frowned at Branna. “Why?”

Branna chuckled. “I have to help you deliver the placenta, babe, and I want to weigh him.”

Oh, right.

“Okay,” I glowered and carefully handed my son over to her.

Branna smiled as she leaned in and kissed my head. “He will be back in your arms before you know it.”

I hoped so, I already missed him.

Branna weighed the baby, and he was ten pounds on the dot.

Ten. Fucking. Pounds.

I was terrified to think how big he would have grown had I carried him full-term.

After weighing him, Branna then cleaned him up and placed him in the Moses basket next to my bed. Everyone, except Kane, left the room then as Branna came to my side.

The next ten minutes were painful, but not as painful as active labour.

“There you go,” Branna said as she pressed on my stomach once more.

I winced as I felt something pass through my body.

“All done,” Branna announced then reached into the water and lifted a clump of something nasty looking and placed it into a plastic bag next to her.

Branna lifted our son from the Moses basket and gave him back to me, I held my arms up making sure the blanket he was wrapped in didn’t touch the water of the pool.

I glanced up when I heard a soft click. I noticed Branna had left the room so it was just Kane, our son and me.

“I was so scared there for a second.”

Kane kissed my shoulder. “Me too, sweetheart. My heart stopped.”

Mine did, too.

Our son wailed and it made me chuckle when Kane said, “I love your cry.”

I gazed at the baby then murmured to Kane, “You don’t think the smoke from that night hurt him, right?”

“No,” he replied. “Look at him; he is healthy as can be. Pink and big all over.”

His little face was pressed against my chest, and his instinct took over. He tried to suckle on my skin so I nervously repositioned him under my breast as I remembered what Branna had taught me. Kane reached around and adjusted my breast and nipple with his hand until it was close to the baby’s mouth.

It took about a minute of adjusting, and brushing my nipple against our son’s mouth, but he eventually latched on and began to suckle.

“Ow,” I winced.

“Are you okay?” Kane asked me, his voice barely a whisper.

I nodded, but continued to wince. “It hurts a little, but it’s okay. Branna said that a little pain was normal.”

Kane pressed his face to the side of mine, and we both looked down as our son fed for the first time. I heard a little click, but didn’t look up. I heard some movement then the sound of a shutter caught my attention.

I looked up and saw Branna smiling apologetically as she tucked her phone into her trouser pocket.

“Sorry, it was too perfect of a moment not to capture.”

I smiled and looked back down to my son.

“How is everythin’?” Branna’s voice whispered.

“Perfect.”

“Branna,” Kane murmured. “He latched on.”

“Brilliant,” she beamed as she moved closer. “Are you feelin’ okay, Aideen?”

I nodded my head.

I felt incredible.

I looked down to the baby when the pressure on my nipple lessened. I noticed he unlatched and smacked his lips together a few times, before just lying in my arms in a baby drunk daze.

“Your colostrum must taste good,” Kane chuckled. “Look at him.”

I smiled. “I love him so much.”

“Me too, babydoll.”

“Put him in his Moses basket,” Branna instructed, “and we’ll get her out of the pool. I want her dried and into warm clothes as soon as possible. I don’t want her to catch a bug; she’s very vulnerable right now.”

Kane sprang into action as he climbed out of the birthing pool.

He very carefully placed our son in his Moses basket that was by my side of the bed. He came for me then, and with Branna’s help, they got me up and out of the birthing pool. I walked slowly away from the pool and winced. I could move, but it hurt to do so.

Branna went and got a basin of hot water and both she and Kane washed me down with a sponge bath. It only took a minute, but I felt so refreshed after and relaxed into Kane as he wrapped a large towel around me and rubbed me dry.

He dried himself off and changed clothes in record time. When I was completely dried off, Branna checked my privates once more and said she was very pleased that I had no tear from delivery. When she gave me the go-ahead, I stepped into a large pair of granny knickers that had the mother of all maxi pads attached to it. After that was up, I got into a new fresh pair of loose pyjamas. Kane gave me a bobbin and held onto my hips as I tied my hair up into a bun that sat on top of my head.

I needed to wash it and take a proper shower, since I never got the one I wanted during the early stage of my labour, but that could wait until tomorrow. Right now, I was clean and totally exhausted. I needed to get into my bed, which Kane helped me with since it wasn’t low to the floor. When I climbed under my covers, I winced a little then glanced at the clock on the wall and saw it was half seven in the evening.

I couldn’t believe it; it felt like the day was never ending, and it was only half seven. That meant I had only been in labour for seven hours. It seemed like a long time, but I knew from research, and Branna, that it was considered a quick birth especially for a first time mother.

“Are you up for some visitors?” Kane asked me.

I blinked. “Who’s here?”

He snorted. “Your father, all your brothers, all my brothers and all of the girls.”

I smiled and nodded my head. “Of course they can come in. They’ve waited to see him as long as we have.”

Kane left the room to get them as Branna picked up my son from his Moses basket and placed him in my arms. Branna had put a blue baby hat on his head to lock the heat in. He was wrapped up tightly in a thick blanket, cocooning him.

“He isn’t dressed.”

I blinked. “Could you do it? I want to watch you so I can copy. I fear I will hurt him.”

Branna smiled as she took my sleeping son and laid him across the bed. “I gave him a quick wash like I did you, but you can give him his first proper bath tomorrow after you get some rest.”

I nodded my head and watched as she unravelled the blanket from my son. I found myself leaning over to check between his legs.

I smiled when Branna laughed. “I’m just checkin’ to make sure he is really a boy... I can’t believe it. I thought for sure he was a girl.”

“Kane and all the brothers were right, that’s a bloody first,” she chuckled.

I didn’t look up when the door to my bedroom opened; I was too focused on what Branna was doing. She was carefully putting the tiniest nappy onto my son, mindful of the clamp on his umbilical cord.

“Omigod,” I heard a female whisper.

I felt people enter the room, but I couldn’t look away from Branna’s hands as she dressed my son. She gently put a vest on him followed by a blue baby grown, mittens and a white cardigan. She adjusted his hat and I smiled when he yawned and made a squealing noise.

Branna lifted him up, kissed his cheek then placed him in my arms. I looked up then and smiled. Everyone was in my room, and they all had huge smiles on their faces. There were some tears, too.

“Aideen,” Keela blubbered and came to my side of the bed.

She leaned in, kissed my cheek. “Well done, honey.”

I smiled in thanks and looked down to my son when she placed her hand on his little arm.

“He is perfect,” she whispered.

I agreed wholeheartedly.

“Darlin’.”

I looked up and smiled wide. “Hey, Granda.”

My father’s resolve broke as tears fell from his eyes. Keela moved over to her place in front of Alec while my father sat next to me on my bed and put an arm around my shoulders. He kissed my face and hugged me to him before we both gazed down at my bundle of joy.

“He looks just like you,” my father murmured. “So beautiful.”

I smiled again and lifted my arms. “Do you want to hold him?”

My father nodded his head and stood up. He reached down, and gently picked up his grandson, holding him protectively against his chest. Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched him interact with my baby.

He cooed down at him when he whimpered a little and swayed from side to side.

“Hey, buddy,” he whispered, he eyes welling up. “I’m your Granda.”

That was it.

My tears came fast and furious, making a few of the lads laugh.

“Well done, baby sister.”

I smiled at James when he came over to hug me, followed by my other brothers. Gavin held onto me the longest and told me loved me more than anything in the world... except his nephew. That made me chuckle.

“What is his name?” This came from Bronagh.

I looked to Kane who looked as lost as I felt.

“No idea yet.”

Everyone chuckled at us.

I hugged Kane’s brothers then, and I thanked and apologised to Nico, Alec and Damien for any harm or discomfort I brought to them during my labour. They smiled at me and waved it off like it was no big deal.

I cried some more when I got to the girls. They all cried, even Alannah who was usually the best of us for controlling her emotions. We all laughed and chatted as my son was passed around to everyone. I watched as each and every one of them fell in love with my child, and it only caused my love for them to grow.

I don’t know how long everyone stayed, but by the time everyone left, even Branna after she checked on us both once more, I was close to falling asleep sitting up. I had just finished feeding the baby again and settled back into my bed when a switch flipped inside of me.

It was an odd sequence of events. One moment I was so captivated by my newborn son, that I forgot about everything, and the next the mist of joy that clouded my mind lifted and confusion set in.

I looked at Kane and frowned.

I didn’t think much of it earlier because I was in labour, and afterwards it never occurred to me because I was so wrapped up in the baby and everyone else... but now that I had a minute to think, I was curious to know where Kane had been all day.

I was curious to know why he almost missed our son’s birth.

“Kane?”

He was folding up the birthing pool.

“Hmmm?”

I tiredly blinked. “Where were you all day today?”

He froze.

His hesitation in answering caused my stomach to churn.

“Kane?” I whispered.

The muscles on his back contracted.

“What?” he asked after a moment of silence.

He knew what I asked, but he was stalling.

“Alec was callin’ you for ages, Ryder too, but neither of you answered. Where were you?”

“I was in the gym for about two hours,” he replied.

I swallowed. “And for the other hours?”

He placed the birthing pool back into its container then turned to face me.

“Helping Ryder move... some stuff.”

Tears welled in my eyes.

“Kane.”

He took a step forward. “I swear if I knew you would be having the baby today I wouldn’t have left your side.”

I held my hand up in the air. “Stay where you are.”

Kane tensed, but nodded.

I lowered my hand to my stomach and exhaled. “You were movin’ drugs or weapons... weren’t you?”

Kane opened his mouth, but closed it when no words came out. I watched his hands ball into fists just as I felt the tears that welled up in my eyes spill onto my cheeks.

“Please let me come to you.”

I shook my head. “I was in labour all day... and you were out helpin’ Ryder with that horrible stuff.”

Kane swallowed. “I’m—”

“Your brothers held my hands, listened to me scream and curse at them, and did everythin’ in their power to help me. They never left me side the entire time. They were scared shitless, but they were there for me.”

“Aideen,” Kane whispered, his own eyes glazing with unshed tears.

“You almost missed him comin’ into this world.”

Kane couldn’t hold my gaze anymore. He dropped his head and sagged his shoulders in shame.

“I’m disgusted with myself for not being here for it all.”

I was disgusted with him too.

“What did I tell you?” I asked him.

He looked up at me and shrugged.

“I told you I wouldn’t be with you when you’re attached to that life.”

Pure panic marred Kane’s features.

“Please,” he begged in a low voice. “Please forgive me. I won’t do it again. I won’t help Ryder ever again. I swear on my life.”

It hurt me seeing him so desperate, but I decided I had to be cruel to be kind. I loved him, and I was not letting our relationship fail because of his stupid mistakes. He was my forever, and I was going to make him realise the baby and myself were his.

I kept my expression as blank as I possibly could; I tried my hardest to be heartless.

I was about to scare him straight.

“I think you should leave,” I said, locking my gaze with his.

“Aideen,” he choked and stumbled forward until his knees knocked into our bed. “Please, I’m begging you, don’t do this.”

Don’t break until he does.

“I didn’t do anythin’, you did,” I replied leisurely. “I’ve asked you, no I’ve begged you, repeatedly, to tell me what you and Ryder were up to, and I’ve pleaded with you not to be involved with it... but you completely ignored me. You said it wouldn’t take you from me, but it has. You almost missed the birth of your son for it… was it worth it?”

“I’m so sorry,” he croaked, as tears fell from his eyes and dropped onto his cheeks.

Put the fear of God into him.

“No, I’m sorry, Kane,” I said with a shake of my head. “I’m sorry I let this go so far. I truly thought your love and respect for me would be enough for you to do the right thing, but I’m obviously not worth it. You chose somethin’ dangerous, illegal and plain disgustin’ over me.”

I looked down to my left hand, wiggled the engagement ring off my finger and threw it to the end of the bed where it landed before him. He looked at me with widened eyes and the look of utter heartbreak that encased him was almost too much for me to bear. But I needed him to realise that he could lose me over something he thought wasn’t much of a problem.

I wanted him scared shitless.

“Please don’t leave me,” he cried. “I’d die without you.”

I looked to our son so he wouldn’t see my act was falling apart.

“If you don’t put me first, what’s to say you won’t put him first?”

I looked back to Kane as he grabbed my engagement ring and crawled up the bed until he was face to face with me.

“I’m begging you not to do this. You and that precious boy are my everything, I swear to you.”

I frowned. “I don’t know if that’s enough for us to work.”

“Babydoll,” he breathed and placed his hands on my cheeks. “I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make this work. I don’t want to lose what I live for. You and our son. I never thought it was possible to love two people as much as I do you two. I love you both so much it hurts. Please, don’t take away my reason for living.”

Damn him!

I leaned into him. “You swear on his life that you’re done with anything related to your old life?”

“I swear.” He frantically nodded. “I swear to God.”

I regarded him for a long moment before I nodded and said, “Okay.”

Kane crumbled before me, and pressed his forehead against mine. I forced myself not to fall apart, but my God it was hard. I had never seen him so broken, and it gutted me that I caused it, but I had to.

I had to scare him into believing I was really done with him; if I hadn’t, who knows how long he would have ‘helped’ Ryder for. For all I knew, it probably would have forced us apart in the long run and broken our family.

“I love you so fucking much,” he whispered.

I put my arms around his neck. “I love you too, sweetheart... now give me my ring back.”

Kane wiped his face before he placed the ring back on my finger and kissed it. I lifted my hand and nudged his head up until he was looking at me.

“You have me heart,” I told him. “Don’t ever forget that.”

He nodded his head. “I won’t, not ever.”

I kissed him then, and he kissed me back with a fierce hunger. It lasted a few moments before he pulled back and rustled around until he was under the bed cover next to me.

“Lie down,” he urged. “I need to hold you.”

He helped me get settled on the bed before he stretched out next to me.

“Babydoll?”

I snuggled back against him and murmured, “Yes.”

“I say it all the time, but I really do love you with all of my heart. You know that, right?”

I closed my eyes and smiled. “I know, babe. I’m sorry about being so horrible, I never want to hurt you or make you cry.”

“You had every right to be furious with me. I almost missed our son being born over Ryder and his stupid deals.”

I snuggled into my pillow. “Let’s not talk about it anymore. It’s done now and your decision has been made. You made it for his birth and that’s all that matters.”

I felt Kane nod as he hugged me, lowering his hands down to my stomach.

“It’s all flabby,” I grumbled.

Kane snorted. “It’s weird that your stomach isn’t huge and hard. I can still feel a smaller bump, but Branna said that will go down in a few days as your womb starts the process of shrinking back to normal.”

I looked over my shoulder. “You talked to her about stuff like that?”

“All the time,” he nodded. “I want to know what you’re going through.”