Текст книги "Aurora James"
Автор книги: Jessica Ingro
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Текущая страница: 9 (всего у книги 16 страниц)
Xavier O’Brien surfaced from his dream, gasping for air. His body was slick with sweat and shook with the remnants of the horrific sequence of events he had witnessed while sleeping.
It had been all too real watching Aurora open her door for him, wearing nothing but a smile—a smile that he somehow instinctively knew was just for him, like a secret shared amongst the two of them. When he reached for her, the room melted away only to be replaced with the very real nightmare he was forced to relive constantly over the last fifteen years.
It never gets easier.
The heels of his hands dug into eyes as he forced the images from his head. The darkness encroaching around the edge of his vision slowly receded and his breathing leveled out.
Christ, that was a bad one.
Throwing the covers off his naked body, he cursed with a heavy sigh. It was too hot to sleep.
Climbing out of bed, he padded to the walk-in closet and grabbed a pair of jeans and t-shirt. Throwing the clothes on, he made his way down the hall and through the open-plan living room and kitchen, heading towards the garage. Taking the keys for the Aston Martin out of the lock box on the wall, he bleeped the locks and folded inside.
Top down, he reversed out of the long driveway, vaguely noting his next-door neighbors had a For Sale sign in their front lawn. With the car in drive, he punched the gas and let the powerful engine take him away into the cooler night air.
As he headed north on the highway, his mind drifted back to the last time he’d gone for a drive to clear his head. Memories of Aurora’s infectious laugh assaulted him. The way the wind had blown her hair around her face. The lost look in her eyes when she’d talked about wanting to live on the lake again and how she’d never be able to. The way he’d wanted to kiss her until she thought of nothing but him.
Fuck, but he missed her. Which was absolutely insane. He barely knew her, but something about the way she displayed her heart to him without any pretenses made him want to protect her. Or maybe it was the fact that she went toe-to-toe with him without hesitation, something not many people had the guts to do.
Either way, the madness of it all was swallowing him whole.
Xavier had tried hard to keep a tight leash on his growing affections for her. He knew it was selfish of him to treat her the way he had. He wasn’t surprised she’d tried to make a pass at him with the mixed signals he had been sending. Not letting her spread herself for the men who frequented The Den while keeping her at arm’s length wasn’t fair to her. He didn’t give one fuck about that, though. It was necessary to keep her safe. And damn it, he wanted to keep her from selling her soul.
He saw the changes taking place in her, just as he did with nearly every girl who walked through his door. The innocence was fading, only to be replaced by a woman who was hard and cynical. Soon she wouldn’t bat an eyelash at some crazy fuck who wanted her to take it up the ass while he choked her. It would be just another day at the office for her.
He didn’t want that for her. Never her.
It had been a long few weeks since she insisted he leave her be and let her do her job. Seeing her disappear in back with different men nearly killed him. Xavier wasn’t the type of man to check his emotions or reactions to situations he couldn’t control, which was why he found himself spending less and less time at The Den whenever she was there. Otherwise, he was likely to scare the shit out of Aurora with the sick and twisted things he felt compelled to do to any man who touched her.
As if the car had a mind of its own, he found himself on the familiar road. The same road that would take him to her. It would seem he had become a glutton for punishment since meeting the beautiful and intriguing Aurora James.
Xavier drove slowly by her apartment building. It really was a shit hole. Not a place for someone like Aurora. And definitely not a place for a young mother and her daughter. They belonged in a safe fucking house overlooking the Goddamn lake, just like she wanted.
The lights in her unit were out and he glanced at his clock, cursing that it didn’t look like she was back from Marx’s house yet. It was just after midnight. Marx never kept a girl that long.
Hitting a button on the steering wheel, the car filled with the sound of his phone ringing.
“Boss,” Eddie, his driver, answered on the second ring.
“You still with Aurora?” he asked, barely controlling his temper.
“Yes,” the man confirmed.
“Is she upstairs?”
Hesitation and then, “Yes.”
Xavier punched the steering wheel in frustration. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. He never should have let her push him into kissing her that night. If he hadn’t lost control, he never would have taunted her into defying him.
And it wouldn’t feel like there was a fist wrapped around his heart right now.
His first instinct was to send Eddie upstairs to make sure she was safe, even though he knew Marx would never, not ever, harm a woman. Especially one of Xavier’s girls. Even if he was tempted to, he knew Xavier would kill him for it.
No, he wanted Eddie to go up there so whatever was happening between the two of them would be interrupted. He loathed the idea of Marx wanting more from Aurora.
Hell, he loathed the idea that Marx had seen her naked. Had touched her smooth, creamy skin. Something Xavier had been longing to do since the first time he laid eyes on her. Something that most definitely would have happened that night in her kitchen if he hadn’t stopped before things got out of control.
“Let me know the minute she comes out.” He barked the order into the phone and then disconnected.
Throwing the car in drive, he drove faster than the law allowed to Marx’s. Why he did it, he wasn’t sure. The only answer that came to mind was that he really was a glutton for punishment.
And surely that was the reason, for twenty minutes after he pulled up across the street from Marx’s condo, he watched as Aurora alighted from the building with Marx right behind her.
She looked stunning in a burgundy dress that clung to every delectable curve on her body. Just looking at her had his body tightening with need. Memories of the way she felt against his body darkened his mood even further. It was pure torture remembering how responsive she was for him. How he wanted to get her off. Wanted her beneath him. His name on her lips as she came for him.
What the fuck is Marx playing at? he wondered darkly as the man’s hand rested low on her back, practically on her ass.
Eddie climbed out of the car and stood attentively at its side while Aurora turned to Marx. She looked up at him with a beaming smile. Marx’s hands settled on either side of her face. His head descended and his lips brushed against hers. They murmured something to one another before she reluctantly pulled away from him and ducked inside the car door Eddie was now holding open for him.
Son of a bitch.
The tires squealed as Xavier pulled away from the curb.
He was a bastard. He knew it. And he was getting nothing less than what he deserved.
I was scrubbing the bathroom while waiting for Sophie to get home from Ruth’s, a smile playing on my face as I thought about how sweet and sexy Marx had been the night before.
When Eddie had dropped me off at Marx’s, I was surprised to find I wasn’t nervous at all. I was actually anticipating my time with him. He was so handsome and polite, and it didn’t hurt that he really knew how to get a girl off.
Instead of getting right down to business like we had the time before, we sat at the bar making small talk for a while. He surprised me when he remembered the drink I’d ordered the last time, making it efficiently before leaning against the bar. While we chatted, his fingertips trailed lightly over my hand and forearm, making random patterns. His eyes followed the movement with rapt attention before lifting my fingers to his lips and sucking one into his mouth. My words died on my lips at the seductive move.
With my attention fully on him, he led me to the bedroom where his preferences hadn’t changed. Tied up, I struggled against my binds while he jerked off, coming on a towel on the floor.
I bit my lip while I waited to see if he’d see to me as he had before. I didn’t have to wait long before a long finger sank inside me. It felt so fucking good.
The orgasm built with lightning speed. I was so close to the precipice when his tongue joined the foray, flicking against my clit with such precision I moaned long and low. When his lips wrapped around my flesh and sucked and his finger stroked my G-spot, I detonated. My body convulsed, my hands pulling roughly at the rope around them, and my toes curling. I struggled to breathe as my heart continued to gallop in my chest.
Marx brought me down with gentle strokes that were surprisingly tender. Instead of cleaning up after his release, he untied me first. His arms lifting me and placing me further in the bed. With a flick of his wrist, he pulled the covers down and climbed in beside me before settling them back over our bodies.
At first, I was taken aback by this change in plans. Surely this was more the type of behavior expected of a boyfriend and girlfriend not a prostitute and client. Granted, I had only been with Marx once, but I still hadn’t seen this gesture of affection coming.
With his arm wrapped around my back, a hand resting on my hip, his other running idly through my hair, I laid my head on his chest and draped my arm across his stomach. It would seem Marx liked to cuddle, and he was rather keen on knowing every little detail about me I was willing to share. He asked me question after question, leaving my mind spinning in confusion.
“I don’t understand,” I finally told him. “This is way more personal than the last time we were together.”
He hummed his agreement.
“What’s going on here?”
“I like you,” he simply said.
“I like you, too,” I whispered and tightened my arm around him for emphasis.
“Would you ever date a client?” he asked several moments later.
“I don’t know,” I answered truthfully, considering I had never really given it thought before.
“I very much wanted to fuck you tonight, but I don’t want to do that as your client. I want to do it as your lover.” His finger under my chin tilted my face up to his so I could see the sincerity in his eyes.
“I don’t know what to say to that,” I whispered, barely able to speak past the sudden lump in my throat.
“Think about it. I’ll give you my number, and should you ever want to see me outside of this arrangement, all you need to do is call. Any time of the day.”
When I left later on that night, finally pulling myself from his warm body and strong arms, he handed me a card with his cell phone number on it.
Question was, would I ever actually use it? Tempting as it was, I didn’t know how we would be able to work around my profession and the way we’d met. There were some things I wasn’t sure anyone could get past. And one day I feared he would resent me if I continued to whore myself out to men for money.
Not to mention the fact that there was no way in hell I would ever let another one of the girls touch him if he were my man. Sharing was not my thing.
Plus there was the very real attraction I still had for Xavier. Something I was pushing to the back of mind and hoping it stayed there. But right then, I had to be honest with myself.
Being with Marx had been… nice.
Being with Xavier had been… extraordinary.
Whenever I envisioned the life I wanted for myself, I always saw a home on the lake with Sophie running around in the yard, throwing rocks in the water. Maybe a little brother or sister chasing after her.
And even further, I always saw a large bed, and a strong man wrapped around me, moving inside me, telling me how much he loved me. And unfortunately for me, the man my mind’s eye conjured up these days was Xavier.
When the man began to transform into him, I wasn’t sure. How to make it stop, I was equally perplexed on.
Maybe going out with Marx would help solve that particular problem, I mused.
A knock on the door had me taking off my pink rubber gloves and tossing them into the sink.
On my way out of the bathroom, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Short blue cotton shorts that were just shy of being indecent, white ribbed tank top showing a good amount of cleavage, no makeup and my hair piled on my head.
Good thing it probably isn’t the queen, I thought wryly.
Two men stood at the threshold when I opened the door. Both had gray pants and gray and white striped shirts with a moving company logo on the pocket.
“Can I help you?” I asked with a cocked head.
“We’re here to load up your stuff for the move,” the older of the two said, his eyes looking over the paperwork on his clipboard. The younger gentleman was busy running his beady eyes over my body. You’d think I’d be used to men leering at me, but right then I felt like clearing my throat and telling him, Eyes up here, buddy. Or punching him in the throat. It was a tossup.
“I’m sorry, but I think you have the wrong address,” I told the first gentleman.
“You Aurora James?” He looked up from the clipboard with a raised brow.
“Yes.”
“Got orders here to pack your apartment up,” he informed me.
“Um…” I mumbled, unsure how to handle him. I had no plans for moving. Would I like to move? Sure. No one in their right mind would want to live in this dump. I had even considered finding a new place but decided the low rent made for an easier time to save up money.
“We’ll be back tomorrow for the actual move,” he continued. “My name is George, and this here is Scotty. Mind if we come in and get started? We have strict instructions to be done today.”
“I do mind, actually. There’s been some kind of mix-up because, well, I’m not moving.”
“Look, miss. It says right here that you are. See?” He thrust the clipboard in my hand and I looked down at the work order clipped to it. My eyes scanned my name and address, landing on the address my stuff was to be taken to. Lakeshore Drive? What the hell?
I flipped the page and scanned the next document, looking for some sort of clue as to what the hell was going on, stopping short when a familiar name and number caught my attention.
Of course. Why else would he have called me Aurora?
Deep inside, though I tried to ignore it, I secretly loved that it was becoming second nature to think of myself as Aurora, while at the same time I hated the fact that Xavier’s order of forgetting Alyssa was becoming all too real. I could see how the two women were melding together into one.
“Why don’t you come in and have a seat for a moment?” I suggested, stepping back from the doorway to give them access to the living room. “I have a quick phone call to make.”
Leaving the two sitting on my couch, I stomped down the hall to my bedroom and slammed the door shut behind me. My fingers stabbed the screen in anger as I dialed the number.
After a few rings, voicemail picked up. I cursed and tried again only to come up with the same result.
Deciding on the next best thing, I dialed again and waited.
“Yeah.” The burly voice answered the phone on the second ring.
“Where is he, Ghost?” I bit out into the phone.
“Why do you want to know?” he lobbed back, knowing full well who would have me rankled this way.
“Because I have two movers in my house ready to pack up my belongings and take them to my new residence on Lakeshore Drive. That’s why,” I shouted into the phone.
“Fuck,” he cursed under his breath.
“That about sums it up.”
“I’ll see what I can do.” The phone disconnected and I threw it onto my bed even though I really just wanted to throw it at Xavier’s head.
An hour later, poor George looked like he was going to be sick watching the minutes tick by on his watch. I guess he took his orders seriously.
Unfortunately for him, I wasn’t about to let them pack up my belongings.
So, there he and Scotty sat, watching television and waiting. Considering Xavier was the only one who George would listen to about the change in plans, they had no choice.
While they waited, I alternately paced the room and stared at my phone. Neither Ghost nor Xavier had bothered texting me or calling me back, and now both their phones were going to voicemail. Their casualness in this situation was pissing me off something fierce.
George jumped a mile when the front door flew open and Sophie burst through it with Ruth on her tail.
“Mommy,” she cried in delight, throwing herself in my arms.
“How was your sleepover, sweetie?” I asked her in between smacking kisses on her cheeks that had her giggling.
“We had popcorn and watched Aladdin!”
“You did? That sounds like so much fun.”
“What’s going on here?” Ruth asked, eyeing the two men on the couch speculatively.
“Just a small misunderstanding,” I lied.
“Do you want me to stay?” she offered, obviously not trusting the men.
“No. It’ll be fine,” I assured her and rose from my crouch, setting Sophie on the floor. I moved to the door and opened it for her. “Thank you for watching her last night.”
“It was my pleasure,” Ruth said right before she stopped dead in her tracks and stared out the door with wide eyes.
I looked around the door to see what had her looking so freaked out and was met with the sight of Xavier’s way too good-looking face. Rather than his customary suit, his long, thick legs were encased in faded jeans and his biceps bulged against his short-sleeved green Henley shirt. My stomach dipped at the evidence that a casually dressed Xavier was just as deadly as a formally dressed Xavier.
Bastard. He could have at least grown a mole or, I don’t know, gotten plastic surgery to make himself look ugly since the last time I had seen him. It would have been the polite thing for him to do.
“Aurora,” he greeted me coolly even though his eyes blazed with hunger as he took in my attire. Only when he was done mentally undressing me did he shoulder his way past us into the apartment.
“Aurora?” Ruth asked in confusion at the same time I said in a scathing tone.
“Xavier.”
He stopped in the middle of the room like he owned the place, his face blank and his arms crossed on his chest.
Sophie tugged on his jeans to get his attention, which he gave her by tipping his head down to look at her.
“I know you. You’re the knight!” She clapped her hands in glee and gave his leg a hug, and despite myself I smiled. Especially when he gifted my daughter with a breathtaking grin while ruffling her hair affectionately.
“Oh, Lordy be. Who’s that?” Ruth asked me in a near whisper, forgetting her original question. I couldn’t quite tell if she was scared of him or in awe of him. I knew from experience it could go either way.
“My boss,” I answered her.
“Why did he call you Aurora?”
“Long story,” I muttered and turned my attention back to the man in front of me. “What were you thinking?” I asked shortly.
“I was thinking you and your little girl don’t belong in this shit hole.”
Ruth gasped at my side, probably due to his choice word.
“You have no right to dictate where I will and won’t live.”
“So you’re saying you’d rather live here? When you could be in a nice house that sits on the lake just like you wanted?” His eyebrows rose and he gave me a look stating he clearly thought I was the unreasonable one.
“No. I’m saying I can’t afford to live in a nice house that sits on the lake.”
“Yes, you can.” He gave me a defiant look that I wanted to slap off his face.
“No, I can’t.”
“Excuse me,” George cut in. “We really are running out of time if we’re going to hit the deadline.”
“George—” I began to tell him he could leave when Xavier cut me off.
“Go ahead and start in the kitchen.” He nodded toward the room and turned back to me, effectively dismissing George.
“You just can’t—”
“I can,” he argued.
“Will someone tell me what’s going on here?” Ruth demanded to know.
“I’ll explain later. Right now, can you take Sophie to your place?”
“You sure you’ll be alright?” Her sour look told me she didn’t believe for one second I would be.
“Yes, I’m fine. I just don’t want her around for the curse words that are sure to fly around here.”
Ruth complied with my request, luring Sophie away with the promise of ice cream and giving me a pointed look that said I had some explaining to do.
“Can you guys wait outside?” I asked George and Scotty, who quickly obliged even though George was fit to be tied at one more delay.
“What were you hoping to accomplish by doing this?” I asked him once we were alone.
He stared at me with that blank mask of his I hated so much.
“I don’t know what game you’re playing, but I don’t want to play it with you. You made it perfectly clear where we stood and this is not it. I’ve got enough to worry about without you doing… whatever it is you’re doing,” I continued.
What he didn’t do was reply.
Again.
Bastard.
I sighed and said softly, “I know your intentions are probably good and I do appreciate them, but you can’t keep trying to dictate how I live my life. These aren’t your decisions to make.”
His mouth tightened and his jaw ticked, but he still said nothing.
“Please say something,” I implored, beyond tired of the silent treatment. I didn’t expect him to listen, and I definitely didn’t expect what he said.
“I know what it’s like to have nothing. To have shit handed to you and all you can do is eat it while trying to make the best of it,” he said in a low voice that if it all possible sounded scarier than his loud, angry voice. “And I know how it feels to want a place to call your own.”
His words and the steely emotion behind them made my heart squeeze. No one who experienced his cool composure would ever guess that he knew what it was like to struggle. This was such an uncharacteristic look into the mystery that was Xavier.
“Sometimes you need someone to have your back, Aurora. I have the means to give you what you’re reaching for, and I won’t slap your hand when you do. Let me take care of you.”
“It’s too much,” I whispered.
“It’s really not. The rent on the house is paid for a year. Don’t let pride stand in the way of your happiness. Take it.”
“I can’t.” I shook my head. There was no way I could ever accept a gift like this, especially from him. Not after what had happened between us not ten feet from where I stood.
He crossed the room in three long strides. His body pressed against me as his hands ran through my hair to cup the back of my head. With nowhere to go, thanks to his tight hold on me, all I could do was stare in his beautiful blue eyes and find myself mesmerized by his long, thick lashes.
Being this close to him had all my resistance fleeing. He smelled so good, and I found myself wishing he would kiss me. I had to bite my lip to keep myself from begging him for it.
“Let it be me,” he whispered, and my eyes closed to hide the emotions those four words evoked in me. I wanted to laugh with glee and at the same time cry in sorrow, neither of which I wanted him to see.
“Let me be the one to give you something beautiful.” My heart instantly melted at his words. For as much as I denied it, that was what I wanted. For him to be the one to give me anything and everything. I wanted him to protect us. To love us.
I wanted it too much, which was why I knew I’d never have it.
“Let me take your back,” he continued.
All my encounters with Xavier taught me one thing—he was a magnet pulling me in and at the same time pushing me away. I needed to take control or I would end up throwing myself at him again. After how poorly it had ended the last time, I wouldn’t be able to handle another rejection.
My hands gripped his forearms, putting pressure there and telling him I wanted him to pull away. When he let me, I fought the sadness that threatened to overwhelm me.
“I can’t play these games with you. You had your chance and you threw it in my face,” I said in a low voice to hide the emotion behind them.
I took two steps back, putting some much-needed distance between us. “I’m grateful for your offer, but I cannot accept it.”
“Aurora—”
“No. I need you to leave.” He reached for me and I took another step back. “Now.”
He moved to the door, pausing with his hand over the knob, and my heart tripped at what that might mean. His shoulders rose and fell with a deep breath before he lowered his hand and turned the knob. Without even putting up a fight, he walked out, not even bothering to look at me, which was probably a good thing given the devastation that seemed to overwhelm me almost instantly.
When I heard the door shut behind him, I wrapped my arms around my middle and slid down the wall until my ass hit the floor. Only then did I allow the tears of sadness and frustration to fill my eyes.
