Текст книги "The Weight of Souls"

Автор книги: Bryony Pearce

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27
FROM THE FIRST MOMENT

“Tay, you have to wake up. I don’t know how long I can hold you.”

I didn’t want to wake up. I was comfortable, my hands were relaxed at my sides, dangling in a cool breeze, and someone had their arms around me.

“Tay, can you hear me?”

“Go away,” I murmured.

“You reallydon’t want me to do that.”

“Justin?” I frowned and opened my eyes.

Then I remembered. I jerked and clutched at him, scrambling for a safe foothold as well.

“Y-you caught me.”

He nodded and helped me move until I could sit carefully on a plank.

“Wait a minute, you’re on the same pole I am.”

His brow furrowed. “I thought it was because you were unconscious.”

I pursed my lips. “I’m awake now.”

I was gripping a crossbar with white knuckles. He knocked on the metal, sending some rust flaking off into the breeze.

Then the blood drained from my face as I realised: there was only one explanation. “I died.”

“You didn’t.” Justin pressed his hand against my forehead. “You’re burning up and you’re completely crazy, but you aren’t dead.”

“It’s the only way you could possibly be doing this.” I knocked on the same bar and it shivered.

“I caught you, Tay. You really are alive. Why don’t you wave at Tamsin, see if she waves back?”

I nodded, grateful for his suggestion. “You’re right.” I scooted carefully to the edge of the platform and waved.

After a moment James and Tamsin both raised their hands. James gave me a fist pump and Harley waggled his phone. They could see me. I wasn’t dead.

Relief flooded me and I slumped onto the boards, inhaling brick dust and letting the splinters prick my cheek.

Then I rolled. Justin was watching me.

“You kissed me,” I said and even I could hear my accusatory tone. He flushed but didn’t move. I rose onto my knees. “I know you’re in love with Tamsin, I see the way you look at her.”

He cleared his throat. “Is now the best time for this conversation?”

There was a gap between two of the boards I was resting on. If I put my eye to it I could see straight down through all the floors to the leering Darkness. “It might be the only time,” I whispered.

“OK.” Justin touched my hand, gently. “Tamsin’s hot. Who wouldn’t look at her? And I can’t believe she’s with James already. But, I’m dead, so I might as well tell you the truth.” He exhaled slowly. “The thing is I fancied you from the first moment you bitched at me about being in your chair. But that whole first year you barely said a single word to me. You only knew I existed when I pissed you off. Wiped your name off the whiteboard, nicked your pencil case, stuff like that.”

I blinked at him. “You were trying to make me noticeyou?”

“Guess I had to die to do it.” He shrugged.

“The others started to harass me and Hannah because they were copying you.” My mind took me back over our fall from grace, the big fight I’d had with Pete after I wouldn't date him, the day he left me and Hannah to the dogs.

Justin winced. “When Tamsin showed an interest I gave up. If I could change things, I would. I didn’t know what was going on with you.”

I pressed my lips together. “No one did. If I hadn’t been so wrapped up...”

“It wasn’t your fault. The reason Tamsin hates you so much, it’s because she knew how much I liked you back then.”

I snorted. “Tamsin’s jealousof me?”

Justin spread his hands. “At least a little.” He picked at his nails. “We’re together because of the club, you know? In the confessional she said she was in love with me.” He peered at her distant figure with sadness greying his eyes.

I gnawed on my lip as the wind whistled around our platform, tired of our intrusion into its domain. “Do you think Tamsin was involved?”

“No chance.” Justin touched my hand. “Things weren’t that great recently, but we’ve meant too much to each other over the last couple of years.”

I rocked onto my knees. “I guess we’ll find out soon enough. Are you sure they’ll tell the truth if I ask?”

Justin nodded. “This game is crazy. Look at what we do. Look at what you’re doing. You don’t break the rules, you just don’t. Plus they’ve got something on you now. If you try and break the silence of the confessional, you’ll be in trouble too.”

“Not as much as them.” I had to shout to be heard over the wind and I realised that the platform was creaking ominously. “We have to get back down.” I pressed my palm against his, throat welling up; he’d liked me all this time. If I hadn’t been blind, we could have had years. Instead, I got one kiss.

“Do... do you want to kiss me again?” My voice was hoarse. Some part of me still waited for him to push me away and laugh.

He didn’t; with shining eyes he pulled me close and pressed his lips once more to mine.

When my knees started to feel weak I pulled away. “It’s not safe doing this up here.” I gave a half laugh, but my head was spinning.

Justin stretched like a cat with a tin of tuna. “I feel great.” He grinned. “We should have done this before.”

“Sure.” I turned and started my careful descent. “But if we do it again, I’m going to be lying down.”

“Oh yeah?” He swung down to my level like Tarzan and I shoved him away, before tentatively toeing the next bar.

“I feel a bit woozy. Just watch me, will you?”

His smile was gentle and he put one hand on my back as I descended. “You can trust me.”

The nearer I got to the ground, the louder I could hear James and Harley whooping. Tamsin was quiet and her fists were clenched so tightly I imagined her nails were drawing blood.

“She does hate me,” I whispered. Justin, sitting next to me on a pole, nodded.

Then I saw Tamsin clutch James’ arm. Even in the semi-dark I could see her face whiten and she pointed with a trembling arm… right at Justin.

“She can see me.” Justin straightened.

“That’s impossible.” I patted his knee and swung myself down to the final platform. I was below the level of the fence now and the void was sucking at my soles like quicksand.

Justin jumped like a leopard to land next to me. “Look.” He turned me to face Tamsin and yes, it did look as if she could see her ex. Her mouth was slack and the whites of her cat-like eyes were showing.

“She’s just pissed that I did the dare, that’s all. That I made it down in one piece.”

“That’s not it.” Justin leaned towards Tamsin. James had his arm around her, talking intently, his hood bobbing under the light. “Tamsin.” Justin shouted and waved and James had to catch her as she squealed and collapsed.

“She can see me,” he insisted.

“She can’t.” I frowned. “The only other people in the world who’d be able to see you are related to me. And I promise you Tamsin Harper and I are not even distantly related.” As I spoke she calmed down, peering blindly into the spot that Justin still occupied. “See?”

Abruptly Justin yelped. He’d been standing on the pole right next to me, but now it was as if it had turned into water. He fell through the metal, toes first and I screamed. Like a diver being dumped into the ocean, he was heading right for the Darkness below.

There was no way I could reach him. There was only one thing I could do: get off the bar so he could touch it again. I threw myself off the platform, as far out away from the patch of boiling Dark as I could.

As I flew I spun in the air, frantic to see what happened to Justin. As soon as my feet left the pole, his arms smacked into it and he was able to hold on, dangling above the pit with terror etched on his face. “Tay!”

Then it hit me: Iwas falling. My body went rigid. I knew tensing up was the worst thing to do but, damn, this was going to hurt. My hair lashed my face and the wind laughed in my ears as I tried to tuck in my arms and legs. What if I broke something?

The ground smacked into me like a sheet of rubberised lead and my breath flew ahead of me as I rolled.

I barely had time to register my bruised side before the Darkness reached for me, filaments like vines snaking from the pit to drag me back. I barrelled frantically, continuing to roll as far away as I could.

Finally I stopped and twisted. My ears strained. I could hear James and Harley laughing. The collection of blackness was palpitating, but something was holding it back. I looked up. I had landed right beneath the spotlight. Although my sweatshirt was covering the bulb it was casting enough of a glare to keep the shadows at bay.

I rubbed my face with shaking hands then tuned my ears into Tamsin’s whine. “You saw him, didn’t you? That’s why you jumped.” She sprinted to my side and grabbed me by my shoulders. “James wasn’t looking and Harley was messing with his phone, but you were right there. You must have seen him.”

I winced. I’d be black and blue tomorrow. “Let go, will you?” I rolled painfully to my feet. Justin had been right; Tamsin had seen him.

I opened my mouth and the fence rattled. Abruptly Pete’s face appeared. “Taylor, thank God you’re OK.” He was gasping. “The guard’s seen the light; he’s on his way round.”

“Time to go.” Harley tucked his phone back in his jeans and leaped for the chain link.

Tamsin was still standing next to me, her face pale under her thick make-up. I grabbed her elbow and shoved her towards her new boyfriend.

My legs protested as I ran, muscles quivering, but I pushed myself to jump at the fence and groaned as I tried to scramble upwards.

“Taylor!” A voice called from above and I looked up. Pete was offering me his hand. I stretched, and my fingertips touched his. The security guard shouted and next to me Tamsin scaled the fence like a monkey.

Hands grabbed my waist and crumpled my shirt as they propelled me upwards. My palm slapped Pete’s and he dragged me to the top of the fence.

I swung my legs over the link and my eyes met those of the angry guard. “Stupid bloody kids,” he shouted. “You think you’re clever? You want to get killed?”

I pressed my lips together, resisting the impulse to apologise and was about to drop to the ground when movement caught my eye. Justin was scrambling down from the scaffolding, staying as far from the Darkness as he could get.

Who had boosted me up?

My heart thudded as I looked down. The ghost of the old woman touched her cane to her forehead in a kind of salute and moved backwards.

I tightened my gloved hand on the fence. She could have Marked me easily; simple contact with the skin on my waist would have done it.

“I’ll come back.” My dry lips formed the words and she nodded as Pete tugged on my jeans. My ankles complained as I dropped to the ground and staggered back. A stray dog barked at us and scuttled away amongst the bin-bags. Then we all ran down the alleyway in a tight group as shadows boiled at the edges of buildings.

The street was busy. The others slowed to a walk, pulled off their hoods and blended. But when they headed towards the tube, I tugged at Pete’s arm.

“I’m owed a challenge, remember?”

He raised his eyebrows. “You want to do that now?”

My eyes strayed to the shadows that bayed at the edges of the pooled streetlights. “Definitely.”

“Where do you want to go?”

“Just somewhere quiet… and well lit.”

“A bar?”

“Quiet.” I reminded him.

“This time of night we’ll be able to find a table.” He rubbed his bald head and raised his voice. “James, alright if we go in here?”

We were passing a Slug and Lettuce. I peered through the doors at the pale wood and the long bar crammed with men and women still in their office-wear. Then I shrugged, Pete was right; the tables at the back appeared quiet.

As I made the decision my mind turned to Justin. I wasn’t sure whether he should be with us for this. But while I considered ducking into the bar after the others, he appeared at a run, ignoring the bodies thronging the street and swishing through arms, torsos and legs, like a swimmer.

When he saw me, he slowed. “Did she Mark you?” He grabbed my arm.

I shook my head and my lips twitched; he was worried about me.

“I saw her touch you and I couldn’t get there in time.” Justin rubbed his hand up and down my arm and his eyes were nowhere near Tamsin. “Are you OK?”

I nodded, trying to show him I was pleased to see him without seemingly speaking to thin air. Then I leaned into him, just slightly and Pete pushed the doors open from the inside. “I thought you wanted to go in here,” he snapped.

“Right.” I let Justin put his arm around me and together we walked through the doors into the bustle and music.

There were three tables left at the back of the room. We took the one furthest from the bar and sat. “I’m getting some wedges.” Harley grabbed the menu. “I’m starving.”

Justin hesitated at the chairs. A few weeks ago it would have been the most natural thing in the world for him to have slouched down with the others. Instead he stood behind me and put his hands on my shoulders.

Immediately my eyes went to Tamsin, but she didn’t even look in his direction. She may have seen him before, but she couldn’t now.

Our table leaned against a window. The Darkness outside pressed against the glass, but didn’t spill in. I slid our candle closer to my seat. I only had to defend myself against it for a short while longer; the truth was about to come out.

“I get to set a challenge now, right?” I turned to James. “That’s what we agreed.”

James blinked. “Don’t you want to chill for a bit? I’ll admit you were amazing up there.”

I shook my head. “I want a truth. And I want it now.”

28
What do you want to know?

“You want a truth,” James sniggered. “That’s a bit tame, isn’t it? What do you want to know?”

I looked into his eyes, then past, into Tamsin’s. She was still pale under her make-up, still rattled. If anyone was going to tell the truth at this moment, it was her. “I’m challenging Tamsin.”

Tamsin blinked owlishly. “Me?”

I touched Justin’s hand where it had tightened on my shoulder and nodded firmly.

She echoed her new boyfriend. “What do you want to know?”

I took a deep breath. “I want to know what really happened to Justin.”

Pete gasped, Harley’s eyes widened and Tamsin opened her mouth to deny all knowledge – I could see it on her face – but James’ hand trapped hers. “Respect the rules, Tam.” He glared at me from beneath his sculpted brow. “Oh’s one of us now and we’ve got videos of her we can send to the police if we have to.” He gave me a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Isn’t that right?”

I stared steadily back at him. “I have no intention of going to the police, whatever I hear.”

“You won’t talk to anyone at all.” He still leaned back, but his tone was threatening.

“No one,” I promised.

James released Tamsin’s hand and straightaway she reached for her napkin and began twisting it in her fingers.

“Tell her.”

Tamsin looked at James through her hair. “Can’t you do it?”

He shrugged. “She challenged you.”

Tamsin shook her head. “I wish I’d never seconded you, bitch,” she muttered.

“Tamsin.” Pete’s voice contained a warning, but James was grinning.

“That’s my girl.”

After a moment Tamsin stiffened her shoulders and brushed her hair back. “You’re not one of us, Oh. You might be in the club, but you’ll always be a freak.”

“So Justin’s death wasn’t an accident?”

Her fingers still moved, restlessly shredding paper. She glanced around us, checking that the waitress was nowhere near then she leaned forward. “Are you ready for this? Sure you want to hear our dirty little secrets?”

Under the table I slipped my glove from my hand and opened and closed my fist like I was cocking a weapon. “I’m ready.”

“Fine.” She leaned back. “Justin wanted out of the club.” She looked at James and he gave a slight nod so she carried on. “He was worried about how ‘dangerous things were getting’.” Her voice spiralled up until she imitated a whine: her impression of Justin. He grunted as if she’d sucker punched him and his hand vanished from my shoulder. I checked and saw him slump at the nearest table to ours, still listening.

“Can you believe it?” Tamsin exhaled. “After all you did to get in, can you imagine anyone wanting to leave?”

I shook my head.

“I warned him. I asked if he’d considered how it would affect me?”

“You?” I frowned.

“Hello, suddenly I’d be going out with the biggest loser in school.” She tossed her hair and the peroxide strands caught the light like a fibre optic web.

I glanced at Justin. His own fists were curled on his knees and I couldn’t see his eyes.

“I begged him not to leave the club. He said if I was so worried about my social life he’d tell someone, get the club shut down.”

“He’d never have told.” I leaned forward. “You guys have videos, don’t you, proof of the stuff he’d done? He was going to Cambridge. It would have ruined his chances.”

Tamsin shook her head. “He was so bloody… honourable.”

My eyes went to the “honourable” ghost. He was pressing his fists into his thighs, shaking his head.

“He wouldn’t have told,” I reiterated.

“I couldn’t take that risk. None of us could. You think he was the only one applying to a good university?”

“So you were worried about a future bagging prawn crackers?” I sneered.

Tamsin curled her crimson lips. “Why not? V is our ticket. You’ve already worked out that we’re not the first generation. There’s a whole network. People in V work for people in V. Members get the good jobs, the chances. How do you think Mr Barnes got to be a head in such a short time? He’s useless.”

I looked at James and he nodded slowly.

“So, if you were afraid you'd lose this network and your chance of a good degree, what did you do?”

Tamsin’s fingers moved faster through the paper. “I spoke to James. He said he’d sort it.”

“Sort it?” My words emerged through gritted teeth and my gaze slid to James. He felt my eyes on him and actually winked at me.

Immediately I returned my focus to Tamsin’s drawl. “James told Justin he could leave without penalty on condition that he did a really serious dare. Then if he tried to go to the authorities about the club, we could grass him up.”

Justin didn’t move.

“So it wasan accident?” I frowned.

Tamsin stared at her hands as if she had only just noticed what she was doing. “James asked me to make sure Justin agreed to his conditions. He had to take on a double dare when James gave him the nod. Harley was the one to find the scaffolding.” She dropped the ragged remains of the napkin on the floor. “Pete had to paint a mark on the highest pole, but James gave him oil.”

“ My God,” Justin whispered.

My gaze went to Pete. Petrol Petethey’d been calling him. His feet were still stretched out under the table and his arms were crossed. But his knuckles strained like tombstones against his skin. “You made me do what?” His voice was low and strained, verging on an explosion. Slowly he folded his legs under him and sat straight.

“You knew,” James sneered. “Why would I have wanted a paint stripe on the pole?”

Pete swore low and vicious. Tamsin’s eyes widened.

“Language,” James snorted and he straightened up too, a threat in his posture. “Part of you knew exactly what you were doing, Pete. And remember, if you do anything to me or if you decide to tell. Well, I’ve got the brush with your fingerprints.”

Pete swallowed. His fists shook on the table, but he made no move towards James.

I leaned forward, prompting Tamsin. “What next?”

She inhaled. “Pete challenged James to climb the scaffolding.” She ran trembling fingers through her hair. “James double-dared him to cross the part without a handrail. Pete refused – you can refuse a double if someone else will take it on – I gave Justin the nod and he took it.”

Horror squirmed like scarabs in my chest. “So you were allinvolved.”

She shook her head. “Justin shouldn’t have tried to leave the club. Anyway, it was James’idea, his plan.”

I nodded. “Maybe that’ll be enough.” Then I spun in my seat, reached across the table and slapped James hard.

“You bitch.” James lurched to his feet. The black Mark glowed on his cheek for a moment; then settled in, as if something had taken a bite from his face.

Harley blinked as if he’d never seen James take a hit before and Tamsin jumped backwards, knocking her chair to the floor. “What’re you doing, you psycho?”

“ I’mthe psycho?” I cried. “You effing killed your boyfriend so you wouldn’t have to be like me and Hannah, for what, a year? Because you were worried you wouldn’t get a great university place or a top job if the club was closed down?”

Justin was literally growlingbehind her. “Mark her,” he snarled.

I raised my hand to show him that the Mark was gone, transferred to James. “Oh no,” I whispered. The Mark remained, oozing over the tendons of my wrist like treacle. “It wasn’t enough.”

“What wasn’t enough?” Tamsin towered over me, the glare from her eyes like a blowtorch. “What’ve you done to my boyfriend’s face, you skank?”

My stomach felt full of rocks and they jumbled around as I moved towards her, making me feel old and ill. Sure, I'd threatened to Mark Tamsin more than once, but I hadn't really meant it. Justin was going to get his justice, but did she really deserve what was going to happen to her? Did any of them?

Outside the Darkness swelled, reminding me that I had no choice.

“You want to know what I did to James?” I grabbed her arm. I shoved her sleeve up as she jerked back, then pressed my bare hand to the unblemished skin of her forearm. My touch left a Mark.

She shrieked and grabbed my napkin, tried to rub it off.

Briefly I closed my eyes, please, oh please, but I knew what I’d see when I looked at my hand.

The Mark wasn’t gone.

I turned to Harley.

“I am actually sorry, Harley.” He wasn't in the same league as his mates. But the Mark wanted him.

He raised his hands, palms up. “Easy, China.” I shook my head and slapped him in a gross mockery of a high five.

Frantically I checked my hand but the Darkness still wasn’t satisfied. I had one more person to Mark. So James was right, on some level Pete must have known what was going on.

My eyes went to my oldest friend. He was sitting upright now, but he hadn’t moved. “What’re you doing, Tay?” he whispered.

Tears choked me. “You always wanted to know why I act the way I do. Why I seem so nuts.”

He nodded. Behind him the Darkness had gathered at the window leaving the rest of the street in grey twilight. “Tay?”

James lunged for me, his face murderous. Pete’s arm shot out and blocked him. “Tay?” he repeated.

If I didn’t Mark Pete, the Darkness would take me. It was me or Pete.

My eyes stung as the tears welled from my throat. “Why did you do it? Why did you get involved in this craziness?” I spat the last word.

He didn’t take his eyes from me. “After you,” he finally said, “it was all I had.”

James grinned horribly. “And don’t forget the videos we’ve got of you, mate.”

“Shit.” I punched the table. “Shit, shit, shit.”

“Tay?” Justin grabbed my elbows. “What’re you waiting for? You have to Mark him.”

“You helped kill someone, Pete.” I spun back to him. “You and Harley, James and Tamsin.”

“Keep your voice down, you stupid slut.” James’ brows were so low I couldn’t see the expression in his eyes. “V’s all about what we’ve got on each other. You promised you wouldn’t tell, but if you forget and open your mouth, remember we could get you locked up for that little stunt on the underground.”

I spoke only to Pete. “Justin was your friend.”

Pete nodded, his face miserable. “It didn’t seem so bad doing little things. It was surreal, like I wasn’t involved at all.” He shook his head. “If I could tell him how sorry I am…” He looked at me. “I didn’t want you involved in this, Tay. I tried to tell you to stay out.”

“I-I know. I couldn’t.” I showed him my hand. “I’m supposed to touch you with this.”

“Do it.” Justin pushed me and I lurched forward, just missing Pete’s elbow.

“Stop it,” I hissed. “Just stop it.” I was finally crying. “It’s Pete, I’m not going to MarkPete.”

I ran out of the restaurant. Behind me I heard James shout. “After her.”

Chairs clattered and a waitress yelled as they sprinted after me. Where did they think I was going?

I crashed through the double doors, out into the street and a bubble of silence.

It’s here.

I spun to find the Darkness rising in front of me like a pillar. I stared into its black heart and my shoulders drooped. I’d chosen this when I’d let Pete go clean.

Around me the street was silent. At the edge of my vision people walked on the other side of the road, eyes turned from me. They didn’t see the Darkness, but they instinctively chose to avoid its presence.

My lip trembled but I raised my hand, showing the Mark almost defiantly.

The world seemed to draw breath and I knew the pillar was about to crash over me.

“Don’t just stand there.” Justin barrelled into me, grabbed my arm before I could hit the ground and pulled me into a stumbling run.

“Justin, it’s over,” I gasped.

“No.” He shoved me in front of him. I saw him look back then he pushed me harder. “You aren’t going with that thing.”

Behind me there was a muffled thud. I dug my heels in and turned. The bar door had slammed into the wall. Harley, James and Tamsin were lined up on the pavement. Pete was hanging back.

“There she is.” James pointed. “Get her.”

I had time only to blink before the Darkness struck. Tamsin didn’t even have time to scream. I met Pete’s horror-filled eyes as his friends vanished, swallowed as if they had never been.

“It’ll come for you now.” Justin shoved me again. “Run.”

Sure enough the Darkness, like a beast unsated, seemed to be seeking a scent. I hesitated one more second and it spread out on the pavement like it had turned to liquid, then started to flow towards me.

I caught my breath, looked briefly at Justin and ran.

I’d never seen anyone outrace the Darkness before, but it was worth a try.