Текст книги "Barely Breathing"

Автор книги: Brenda Rothert

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Текущая страница: 10 (всего у книги 12 страниц)

Viv

THE CAB RIDE TO THE club gave me a chance to freshen up my makeup and dab on a touch of the perfume Kane liked. I was tired from my weekend of travel, but I wasn’t waiting one more day to see him.

Part of my fatigue was caused by missing him. I needed his arms around me. Nothing relaxed me like nestling against his hard chest and breathing in his cedar and leather smell. And after my frustrating weekend of getting the runaround from Henley, I needed to relax in a bad way.

When the cab cruised to a stop at the curb, I paid the driver, got out and saw Kane walking toward me.

“Hey, babe.” He pulled me into his arms and held me close. “Missed you.”

“I missed you, too. I’m so frazzled. I just need to be alone with you tonight.”

“I’ve got a suite ready for us upstairs.” He put an arm around my waist and led me into the club.

Rosie was working the door tonight, and he nodded at me. “Hey, Viv.”

“Hey, Rosie.”

Despite his giant, tough-guy exterior, Rosie was a super sweet guy. Kind of like someone else I knew.

Kane took my hand and wove through the densely packed crowd of people. We went up the wide stairway and into a suite. As soon as he closed the door, the sound of pounding music vanished.

“Oh, Kane.” I eyed the spread of food on the table. Bread and butter, salads, a bottle of chilling wine and . . . I opened the stainless dome covering one of two bowls on the candlelit table for two . . . the spicy soup I’d missed the other night. “I’m starving. This looks amazing.”

His lips curved up in a smile. “So let’s eat. I’m starving, too.”

I sat down across from him and sighed deeply, finally able to relax.

“Does this mean you can slow down with work?” he asked, holding out the bread basket so I could take a piece. “You’ve been killing yourself lately.”

“I got the signature I needed, so I’m close to the end. That client will get billed something like twenty grand for me having to come chase him down like that.”

“Fuckin’ dumbass.”

“You have no idea. But enough about that. How was your dinner with Brooklyn?”

He looked down at his plate. “Good. She did a cheer for me and I saw her spelling test on the fridge. She got ‘em all right. How’d I end up with such a smart kid?”

“You’re pretty smart yourself.”

“Yeah, for a felon.”

I finished chewing my bread and then took the glass of wine he’d poured me, enjoying a long sip.

“First of all, don’t disparage yourself. You are smart. And also, some of the most intelligent people in the history of the human race have been criminals.”

“I miss your bed,” he said.

“What’s with the random subject change?”

He shrugged. “I know you’re exhausted, but I want to come sleep at your place when I leave here.”

I took another drink of my wine and smiled at him over my glass. “I had a key made for you, so you can let yourself in now.”

“Damn right I will. I’m comin’ over every night.”

Our server delivered steak, red potatoes and asparagus. I was only able to eat half the food before pushing my plate away. Once the server had cleared away the dishes and I finished half the bottle of wine, Kane pulled me over to the leather sofa along one wall of the room.

No matter how tired I was, I couldn’t help the stir of arousal I inevitably felt when he kissed me. His lips trailed down my jaw line to my neck. The brush of his beard made my skin tingle with delicious awareness. And when he started sliding my clothes off me, I tipped my head back and moaned, blissfully surrendering my body to him.

His mouth grew hungrier, nipping at my naked skin as he quickly took off his clothes. Within a few seconds, he’d rolled on a condom, sat down on the couch and took hold of my hips, easing me on top of him.

I straddled him, taking in his dark, desperate gaze. I wasn’t sure if I was more intoxicated by my need for him or his for me.

When he lowered my hips until he sank all the way into me, I cried out with eager satisfaction. This was exactly what I needed–to abandon everything but him in this moment. I took over, sliding my body up and down his length until he groaned deeply for more.

“Yes, baby. Ride my dick with that gorgeous cunt. You’re so fuckin’ wet, Viv.” He took a handful of my hair and pulled until my eyes were level with his. “No other man will ever see this cunt, you hear me? No other man will ever taste it. Or see these big, perfect tits.” He smacked one of my bouncing breasts and then ground out another groan as I sank all the way onto him and lingered there. “Your body is just for me. Your tight ass is mine.”

He put two long fingers in his mouth and withdrew them, sliding the tips into my ass as I resumed riding him.

“Oh God, Kane.” An orgasm tore through me like a freight train, obliterating everything else.

“Don’t stop fucking riding my cock, Viv,” he ordered. “Balls deep.”

I obeyed, and the hard, deep contact intensified my orgasm. He slid his fingers further into my ass and wrapped his free arm around my waist, driving his hips upward and fucking me hard.

“Ah, fuck.” His voice was a labored rasp. “Viv . . . Shit. I’m coming.”

There was nothing but the sounds of slapping skin, heavy breathing and groaning as we ground our hips together and I rode out the deepest, most intense orgasm of my life. Kane gently slipped his fingers out of my ass and wrapped both his arms around my back, holding me tightly.

My body was slack with relaxation, and I closed my eyes and let Kane’s warmth seep into me as my breathing returned to normal.

Finally, I laughed low in my throat and pulled back to meet his eyes.

“So. You think my cunt is gorgeous? Or were you making fun?”

He stroked a thumb across the damp skin at the small of my back. “I would never make fun of you. Your body is perfect to me, Viv. Absolutely fucking flawless. I love that you don’t shave your pussy bald or tan or any of that shit. These full hips and big tits are perfection, baby.”

“What brought this on?” I brushed my thumbs over his soft beard, my affection for him welling over.

“I just want you to know,” he said, his tone serious. “You’re the only one for me, Viv. I wouldn’t change one thing about you.”

I kissed him softly. “And you’re the only one for me, my sweet, sexy man.”

He scowled at me. “Sweet? I’m not a fuckin’ pussy, Viv.”

“You’re only sweet to me. And I love that, so don’t ruin it.”

The light touch of his fingertip running down my bare spine made me shiver and curl into him.

“Our secret, then,” he said.

There was nothing but us. Our bodies molded together, fitting perfectly. My cheek was pressed to his chest, and I heard the faint beat of his heart. Even when I was exhausted, Kane made me feel utterly rejuvenated.

IT SNOWED ON CHRISTMAS EVE–big, sparkly flakes floating down to the street when Kane and I walked out of the club after the party there.

He and Jeff had hosted a dinner for the staff and given everyone a cash bonus. The evening had been light and festive, everyone relaxed and looking forward to a second day off tomorrow.

“Did you have a good time?” Kane asked me, wrapping his arm around my waist as we made our way to his car.

“The best. I’m so glad we’re waiting until the day after Christmas to go see my family.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. This is nice, celebrating at home with you.”

My parents were hosting a big get together for the whole family the day after Christmas. They’d been disappointed I wasn’t coming for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day for the first time ever, but I wanted to be with Kane, and he wanted to drop by Cori’s and see Brooklyn and bring her a gift on Christmas morning. For the first time, he could give his daughter a present and watch her open it. That was where we needed to be tomorrow.

I also didn’t want to see Grayson just yet. He’d flown home to Indy yesterday and I didn’t think my parents would appreciate a brawl over my stolen watch and his drug addiction. They had no idea what was going on with my brother. Maybe his appearance would give him away.

“I might give your brother a black eye for Christmas,” Kane said, seeming to read my mind. “Just a heads up.”

I shook my head. “It’s going to be an awkward visit for sure. It’s past time my parents find out what’s going on with him.”

“Let’s not worry about it now. Are we staying at your place tonight?”

“If you want the cinnamon rolls and breakfast casserole in my fridge for tomorrow’s breakfast we are.”

“I do.”

We got to his car and he opened the door for me. I looked up at the sky and let a few fat, wet snowflakes melt on my cheeks.

“It’s after midnight,” Kane said softly. “You know what that means?”

“Hmm?”

“It’s Christmas. Merry Christmas, Viv.”

He pulled me close and I cupped his bearded, snowflake-covered cheeks. We kissed and kissed, not caring that we were standing in a cold, tightly-packed parking lot. When Kane was near, I was always warm.

When we got back to my apartment, I made hot chocolate and after just a few sips, drifted to sleep laying across Kane’s lap. I woke up in my bed much later, sunlight streaming in through the windows.

Kane was half-asleep next to me.

“Hey,” I said, sitting up. “How’d I get in bed?”

“I carried you in here last night.”

“You did? I don’t even remember.”

“You were asleep. Didn’t even wake up when I changed your clothes.”

He reached over to the nightstand and grabbed a small box wrapped in silver paper.

“Open it.”

“I thought we agreed the necklace was your Christmas gift to me.”

He shrugged a shoulder. “I don’t think so. Open it.”

“I have something for you, too. I’ll go get it.”

I was only wearing a t-shirt, and as soon as I left the warm bed I was freezing. I ran into my living room and pulled the box with his gift down from the shelf of my coat closet.

He was sitting up in bed waiting for me when I tossed his present on the bed, jumped back in and got under the covers. I huddled against him for warmth. He leaned down on an elbow and pushed the hair away from my face, looking at me.

“I love you, Viv.” He said it in the soft tone I’d never heard him use with anyone but me. My heart swelled as I held his gaze. His reverence for me was humbling.

“I love you, too. So much.”

He traced a fingertip over my jaw line and around to the back of my neck, cupping it in his huge palm. “Now open my present, woman.”

I grinned and sat up, keeping my legs under the covers as I picked up the silver-wrapped box again. He’d thought of me, and I loved whatever was inside this box because of it.

There was a small, unmarked white box inside. When I opened it and pulled aside some cotton padding, I gasped audibly and put my hand over my mouth.

“Oh, my God. I can’t . . . you bought me a new Bulgari watch.” My heart raced wildly as I picked it up out of the box. “This is just like the one my Gram bought me. How did you know?”

His dark chocolate eyes were so warm on me. Silently, he reached for the watch and turned it over. The back of the face was engraved.

For Vivi

Love, Gram

Tears rushed to my eyes and spilled forth all at once.

“My watch. It’s my watch.” I rubbed my thumb over the engraved words. “How? Did you get it from Grayson?”

Kane shook his head. “It wasn’t quite that easy.”

I leaned over and kissed his forehead, still crying. “This means so much to me. How did you do this?”

A smile played at the corners of his lips. “I had a contest with my employees. Told them the day after your watch was stolen that an engraved Bulgari had been pawned somewhere in the city, and whoever found it would get a thousand dollar cash bonus.”

My mouth dropped open in shock. “You did that?”

“One of my servers found it in two days. She worked that phone like a fucking telemarketer. And she’s a single mom with three kids, so that money’s giving them a nice Christmas. It worked out like it was supposed to.”

“You’re so amazing.” I cradled the watch in my palm. “Every lousy date in my life was so worth it because I was waiting for you.”

His expression turned serious. “You’ve done more for me in the past couple months than anyone ever has. I was a broken man when we met and you put me back together, Viv. I’m whole with you. I love you so much I don’t even know what to do with it sometimes.”

I leaned over and kissed him, cupping his scruffy cheek with my palm.

“Open,” I said, reaching for his gift and handing it to him.

His eyes met mine for a second before he tore into the paper. I held my breath as I waited. When he withdrew the lid of the box, he smiled broadly at me.

“Viv. I love it.”

He reached into the box and took out a framed photo of me and him. We’d been walking in the city one afternoon when he’d snapped it while standing behind me, his arm around my waist and his head leaning against mine.

“What’s the empty frame for?” he asked, taking it out of the box.

“A picture of you and Brooklyn. You need to get on that.”

His eyes softened and he looked through the rest of the box’s contents: an engraved nameplate for his desk, a stone paperweight and a pen set.

“Damn, you’re making me feel like a fuckin’ professional here, baby.”

“As well you should.”

He set the picture frame back in the box and eyed me. “You feel like getting fucked by a professional?”

“You know I do.”

He moved the gift boxes to the floor and climbed over me, parting my thighs.

“Thanks for the presents, Viv,” he said softly. “And for taking a chance on a roughneck like me.”

“You’re so easy to love, Kane.”

He pulled my t-shirt up and over my head, kissing me softly before moving to my breasts, where he was not soft. He sucked and nipped and licked while I hummed my satisfaction and wrapped my ankles around his thighs.

Kane brought my body to the brink with his mouth before taking a condom from the nightstand drawer. His gaze roamed my body hungrily as he sheathed his erection.

“One day soon I’m gonna come in your sweet pussy, Viv,” he said in a low tone. “Of all the stupid shit I did when I was younger, I never once fucked anyone without a condom. Not consciously, anyway. I must’ve when I was high since I’ve got Brooklyn. I’ve got no memory of it, though. I want it with you, when I know it’s safe.”

“Yes. I’m on birth control and I want that so much.”

His eyes were dark as they locked with mine. “I’ll get tested. Then when you come to my office I’ll fuck you hard and fill your cunt full. I like the idea of you walking out of there wet with my come.”

He flipped me over and pulled my hips back, entering me from behind. I moaned and pressed myself back as he sank into me.

I let myself get lost in him, crying out his name as he pounded into me. He pulled me up, my back to his chest, and leaned around to kiss me. One of his arms was locked around my waist and with his free hand, he found my sweet spot and circled his fingers until I came so hard my knees nearly gave out. He was right behind, thrusting deeply into me and biting down on my shoulder as he came with a loud groan and a shudder.

“So fucking hot,” Kane said as he pulled out of me and took off the condom. He took it to the bathroom trash can and then we laid back down for a few minutes, the smells of sweat and sex in the air.

Breakfast was a semi-success. My breakfast casserole wasn’t great, but the cinnamon rolls were decent. I wasn’t much of a cook, but I liked feeding Kane, so I’d just have to get better. And in the meantime, he was too wise to admit my cooking wasn’t the best.

“Ready to go see Brooklyn?” he asked when we’d finished the dishes.

I looked at the clock on my wall. “What time are we supposed to be there?”

“No set time,” he said, shrugging.

“Are you sure it’s okay? I don’t want to interrupt anything.”

“It’s fine, Viv. We’re not staying. I just want to give Brooklyn her present on Christmas instead of next time I see her.”

This meant a lot to him. I agreed, took a quick shower and dressed in a dark green sweater dress, brown leggings and tall brown leather boots.

I was quiet on the drive there, because I was nervous. Meeting Brooklyn was a big deal. I wanted to get to know her, if she and Kane and Cori were ready for it. But I worried about stepping on her mother’s toes. And I didn’t have much experience with kids. What if she didn’t like me?

When we walked up to the front door of Cori’s modest bungalow, I slipped my hand into Kane’s for support. He smiled and rang the doorbell.

“Dad!” The little girl who opened the door took my breath away. She was beautiful, her dark eyes shining with happiness.

“Kane?” a female voice called from inside.

“We just came by to drop off gifts.” Kane led me inside, still holding my hand.

When we went inside, the few family members inside silently checked us out. Cori’s relatives had probably never even seen Kane.

The small house was cozy, with garland over the doorways, a tree covered with a child’s homemade ornaments and opened gifts scattered on the floor. The smell of cinnamon filled the air. Even though none of the furnishings looked new or expensive, they were stylish and the place looked like a comfortable home.

Cori was thin and petite with long, perfectly straight chestnut hair. She was pretty and Brooklyn was too, but Brooklyn looked just like Kane. Seeing the man I loved reflected in the face of his little girl melted me inside.

I wanted kids. With him. I hadn’t seriously thought about it until this moment, but seeing him next to his daughter made it all so clear. I wanted Brooklyn to be as much a part of our lives as she possibly could, and I wanted more kids, too.

“Guys, this is my girlfriend Viv,” Kane said to Cori and Brookyln. He wrapped an arm around my waist.

“Hi,” Brooklyn said, smiling.

“Hi.” I smiled back and turned to her mother. But Cori just regarded me with a cool expression and said nothing. Maybe she was skeptical of any woman who would be spending time with her daughter.

“This is for you,” I said, handing her the centerpiece I’d bought her. It was a basket of Christmas greenery and pinecones. She looked at it with her lips set in a thin line.

“Thanks.” She took it but wouldn’t even look at me. Kane rubbed his hand over my hip.

“Brooklyn, I’ve got something for you,” he said.

Her dark eyes sparkled happily as he handed her a small box. She tore through the shiny silver paper and delicate red ribbon to reveal a Tiffany blue box. Kane seemed to be holding his breath as she opened it.

She gasped and looked up at him. “It’s so pretty. Can I wear it?”

“Brook,” Cori prompted her. “What do you say?”

“Thank you,” she said to Kane.

“You like it?”

“I love it. Can I put it on?”

Kane looked at me. “I’ll let Viv handle that because me and those tiny necklace clasps don’t get along so well.”

Brooklyn handed me the box and I looked down at a silver heart-shaped pendant on a chain with small sparkling silver stones on one side. Kane was working hard at being a good dad. I was so proud of him.

I helped Brooklyn move her hair aside and I put the necklace on her, trying my best to ignore her mother’s icy glare.

“Perfect,” I said when she turned around to show it to me.

“We have to go,” Kane said. “But I’ll see you soon, Brook. Maybe Viv and I can take you ice skating over your school break if it’s okay with your mom.”

“Can I?” Brooklyn asked Cori.

“We’ll talk about it.”

“Merry Christmas,” Kane said to Brooklyn.

“Merry Christmas.” She smiled and toyed with the shiny new necklace around her neck.

Cori reached for Kane and hugged him, pressing herself to his chest. I gripped my purse strap, feeling awkward and out of place. He patted her on the back, but didn’t return the full embrace. Finally, she pulled away, her eyes full of emotion as she looked at him.

We said goodbye and walked out, and Kane wrapped his arm around my waist again for the walk to the car. Once inside, we drove in silence for a couple minutes before I spoke.

“What was that about?”

“What?”

“Cori,” I said, my tone indicating it was obvious. “She hates me.”

“No, don’t take it that way.”

“She glared at me the whole time we were there. What does she have against me?”

He shifted in his seat and I felt a nervous flutter in my stomach.

“Kane. What does she have against me?”

“How can she have anything against you? You’ve never met before.”

I sighed with aggravation. “Don’t tell me you didn’t notice how cold she was to me.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Was she just upset that we dropped by unannounced?” I continued before he had a chance to answer. “No, because look at the way she hugged you. It’s just me she hates.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“I know there’s something you aren’t telling me. What is it?”

He shifted in his seat again. “Let’s not talk about her on Christmas, babe.”

“Too late. Tell me.”

His expression darkened slightly. “She’s made comments about wanting to get with me.”

My heart nearly stopped. “Get with you? Are you serious? What, like sexually?”

He gave a half shrug. “Yeah, but not just that. She wanted us to try a relationship.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” My voice was high with panic but still laced with anger.

“I told her no, Viv.”

“Pull the car over.”

“Babe, don’t–”

“Now. Pull over, Kane. Right. Now.”

With a heavy sigh, he did. Then he just looked at me, his expression a mixture of annoyance and expectation.

“Why didn’t you tell me? How could you take me over there and not tell me that?”

“I told her no,” he repeated, as though it answered everything.

“Did she even know I was coming with you today?”

He lowered his brows and stared straight out the windshield. “No. I don’t need her fucking permission to bring my girlfriend places with me.”

“But to her house? On Christmas?”

“Look. She got out of line last weekend and I was trying to send her a message. I’m with you, and she needs to respect that.”

My mouth fell open in shock. “What do you mean, out of line?”

He shifted in his seat. “Does it matter?”

“You bet your ass it matters.”

“She . . . came on to me, I guess. Grabbed my dick and said some stuff.”

My heart pounded wildly. “Grabbed your dick? And you didn’t think you should mention that to me? What did she say?”

“I already told you. She wanted to get with me. Talked about her pussy being shaved and shit.”

The fucking whore. I thought it and almost let it fly out of my mouth.

“With Brooklyn there?”

“No. Brook left to go to a sleepover.”

Tears pricked at my eyes. “And you stayed? With Cori? Who was grabbing your dick?”

“I left when she started that shit.”

I buried my face in my hands and took a few deep breaths.

“Viv, what are you so pissed about? I turned her down cold. Several times. I’m with you. I love you.”

“And what about seeing Brooklyn? You’ll just keep going over there and playing right into Cori’s hands, because it’s the only way you can see her.”

“I’ll never turn my back on Brooklyn again. Don’t ask me to do that, Viv.”

I lowered my hands to my lap, clenching them into fists. “I’d never ask that. But now I feel like a homewrecker.”

“That’s fucking nuts. Cori and I slept together a few times ten years ago. I was too high to even remember it. She got pregnant. We’ve never been together. Not like you and me.”

“She’s Brooklyn’s mom.”

“So what?”

I turned to face him, gathering my courage to ask a question I was afraid of the answer to.

“Did you think about it? Giving things with her a chance so the three of you can be a family?”

He pressed his lips together, silent for a few seconds. The longest seconds of my life.

“There’s my answer,” I said, my voice breaking. “Take me home. I don’t want you coming with me tomorrow.”

“Be rational, Viv.” He scowled at me. “What matters is that I chose you.”

“While I foolishly didn’t even know I was in a contest with anyone.” I wiped the tears from my face. “I hate you right now. Take me home.”

He did, and I slammed the car door and stormed into the house alone, locking the deadbolt. I got in bed and cried and cried and cried, not stopping until my eyes were swollen and I had a pounding headache.

It hurt bone deep that my one and only had considered another woman, even for a second. I didn’t think that was something I’d be able to forgive.