Текст книги "Atlas"

Автор книги: Alyne Roberts

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XVIII

Atlas

Stella's breathing was deep and even. She slept without nightmares. After I left her to clean up, I snuck back in when she fell asleep. I fucked up last night. Fuck-ups are unlike me. I didn't have a backup plan for this. There was no Plan B for "Atlas fucked the prisoner we were supposed to kill at the end." Why didn't I think this through?

Where did I mess up? Was it watching her for so long while I learned her habits and waiting for the police to forget about her? Did I make the fatal mistake when I touched her skin at the club? Maybe I should have never kissed her. I knew I shouldn't have fucked her.

How did this make me any better than my own father? This whole thing started because he crossed the line into a territory I didn't want to be in, one I thought we were better than. Keeping her against her will, fucking her, and lying to her only to kill her in the end made me just like him. It was no different than what he was doing.

Stella flinched and I knew she was waking. I could sneak out and send one of the guys in. Sal would be glad to have the task, but that thought made me clench my teeth so hard my jaw ached. I may have strayed from the plan, but I was smart. I could think of another plan. One where I didn't have to watch the life drain out of her eyes would be preferred.

"What are you doing in here?" a groggy voice asked. It was raspy from sleep and screaming the night before.

"Thinking," I told her.

Stella rolled and stretched, the blankets falling off her in the process. She was wearing only a robe that had come untied during the night. Smooth, creamy skin was exposed to me. Red teeth marks covered her neck and shoulders. I promised I would hurt her and I never broke a promise. I lost my control with her, and Stella paid the price.

I was a man who never lost my head no matter the intensity of the situation. I never lost my cool in a fight or any dangerous situation I found myself in. And I absolutely never got so lost when with a girl that I didn't think of protection. Stella has this power to make me lose my fucking mind, and I couldn't even think sometimes when she was around.

Stella quickly pulled her robed closed and sat up. Running her hands through her hair, she tried to tame it but gave it up. It stuck up in all directions from tossing and turning all night. Her face was bare of makeup and her lips were still swollen. She was beguiling first thing in the morning, and I couldn't take my eyes off her. I thought her little dress last night was my weakness, but it didn't matter what the fuck she wore.

I looked at her face expecting to see fear and hate. Maybe even anger for taking her so hard and rough. I didn't see any of that though. I saw a calm and acceptance I had never seen in those blue eyes. Never in the months I followed and watched her.

What had she accepted? Me? Her own fate? The fact that she was paying for everyone else's mistakes?

"I've done bad things, Stella," I said gruffly. "Don't look at me like what I did to you was okay. You need to never let me touch you again. I told you that before."

"My dad once said that sometimes good people have to do bad things to save people from other bad things," she said softly.

Her words sent a shock wave through me. She was stubborn and naive just like her brother had warned. I stood and stalked over to the end of the bed. She had the decency to shrink away from me in the slightest as I approached.

"Little star, I'm not a good person," I said, tilting her face up to look at me. She needed to see what I really was.

"Without a doubt, you've done bad things. Ace too. But whatever you are doing now, I think it's to help someone. Ace would never have gone to my dad that night otherwise," she explained.

She looked so sure, so confident in her assumption. Ace loved his little sister. It was the only thing that made me believe he wouldn't turn on me. To save her. I shook my head, fully convinced then that Ace didn’t go there to tell his dad about me and the family. He was there for help.

"I was raised by criminals," I said. "I was born into the family. My dad is the worst and most dangerous man I know. He raised me as his son."

I remembered instead of going to the middle school dance, I went with my dad to beat up someone who owed him money. That was just child's play, the easiest of tasks. I thought I was so cool that I left Marissa May waiting for me while we left some guy bloodied in a parking lot.

"I played my part and contributed to the family like the rest, Stella. Don't think for a second that I'm innocent. There's too much blood on my hands."

Stella didn't argue but didn't agree either. She sat perfectly still, her breathing shallow and controlled. She asked for the truth so I gave it. She would quickly wish she wasn't so curious. I exposed myself when I pointed my gun at Sal. Along with everyone else in the room, she knew I didn’t want her dead. What she needed to know was that I would do what had to be done in the end.

"It was my responsibly to recruit new guys in. They wanted young and strong to join as lower level men. That's how I met Ace. He wanted the money and excitement. It didn't take much to convince him to tag along with me."

It was my fault it took so long to learn his dad was one of Chicago's finest. Ace and I took to each other, and I instantly trusted him. By the time I learned of his family, he was in too deep. I knew he was committed and one of us.

"We stuck to the usual. The stuff you see in the movies," I said with a smirk. "We put pressure on those who owed the family money. We ran security at the casinos, moved guns if needed. Met with contacts for various deals that weren't legal either. We thought we were untouchable."

Stella stiffened and I start to pace the room. She was smart enough to know that it was going to get bad real soon. She was smarter than us. Two boys who thought they ran the city. We had no idea what was coming for us. It was Chicago for fuck's sake.

"Ace met a girl. She worked one of the casinos, faking the books. We aren't supposed to fuck the help, but Ace thought he would never get caught. Soon, she disappeared. Ace was pissed, wanting to know who did it and what they did with her."

I looked back at Stella. Her eyes were glistening.

"They killed her?"

"That's what we thought for a while. The family isn't much for talking things out. We solved things with blood and tears. Hard lessons. But Ace didn't care and went digging around, wanting to get revenge on whoever pulled the trigger. He found something else."

"What?" Stella asked, sitting straighter and leaning forward with interest. Her eyes were wide and bright, hanging on every word. This was the answer she needed. Like Ace, she lost something and needed to know why. This was a family that believed in justice and balance. Not so different from mine in that way.

"We trade guns, funny money, and anything else for profit. One thing that set us apart from the lowest of the lowest monsters was that we didn't trade women. Until we did."

"Women?" she asked, voice tight.

"That's what's going on but we don't have the proof. It's hidden and only a few know. Those in charge know that not everyone will agree. After some digging, Ace found something that led us to think she was alive."

I hated that I believed my next words, let alone that I needed to say them.

"They sold the girl from the casino."

"Human trafficking," Stella whispered.

Silence hung in the air. I let her collect her thoughts. I shattered her image of her older brother. I probably shattered her image of me and my family. I didn't want her to believe I was a good guy like she said. I wanted her to know that we wouldn't stand for kidnapping and selling women. My mom raised me better than that.

It took losing my mom to realize that a woman was something to be treasured and cherished. They put up with our shit and bring us into this world. Their bodies were built for our enjoyment and pleasure, and vice versa. A woman would give us the world without force if earned. And nothing was ever as sweet and fulfilling as something earned.

"Your dad?" she asked.

"Nothing gets past my dad," I said bitterly.

He knew. He was most likely in control of the whole operation. The fact that he allowed me to stay locked away in this lake house this long confirms my suspicion. Up here, I'm out of his way and not snooping around in his little side business.

"And your promise to protect me? Does that still stand?"

I walked back to the foot of the bed and stared down at her.

"I had to get to you before they did. My father and his people would have no mercy."

I finally saw the fear I needed to see in her eyes.

"You are a traitor's sister. You witnessed one of us killing," I explained, drilling it deeper so she would understand. "They would torture you, make you suffer, kill you slowly or maybe even sell you off to the worst of bidders."

Stella blinked and looked down at her hands. There were red marks from the belt last night. I left my mark on her and, realizing that, I started to get hard. Knowing that I owned her like no one else had and that she let me was empowering. It was exactly what I needed after losing my control because of her. It was a fucked up balance in a way.

"He was there for Ace," she said. "The killer. He asked them where he was. They wouldn't tell him, so he killed them."

"You heard that?"

 "He said that Ace pissed off the wrong people," she said with a tight voice.

My dad. Ace and I were digging around where we shouldn't have. We didn't have enough yet, but we had enough to piss him off. I was now positive that Ace and the Harlows died under my dad's orders. He knew we were on to him, but killing his son would cause a scene. Every member in the city would be looking for justice.

"You are just telling me this now?" I asked.

"It's the only thing that was keeping me alive," she spat. "Once you have what you want, I'm of no use."

"And now?"

"Now, I want the fuckers found, and I was raised to believe that lives are worth fighting for."

XIX

Stella

"Stella, you need to leave your room," Tony yelled from the other side of the bedroom door.

Atlas was successful in avoiding me for two days. Sal and Tony constantly hovered, sitting outside my door and never letting me out of their sight. I had never felt so alone and so crowded at the same time. I wasn't sure what to make of Atlas's disappearing act. He gave me a look into the past and the deep secrets he was trying to unravel, only to abandon me when he needed my help.

I swung the door open and stared at Tony. The concern on his face was unmistakable.

"Why do you care?" I asked. "Where is Atlas?"

"He went into the city but should be back tonight," he explained. "You need food and sunlight."

"Trying to keep me alive just long enough?" I asked. Without waiting for a real answer, I pushed past Tony and started down the hall.

I wasn't stupid. From the moment the shock wore off in the hospital on the worst night of my life, I knew my greatest possession was what I had seen. It could get me killed or save my life. In the beginning, keeping that secret was the key to my survival. I saw nothing, knew nothing, remembered nothing. When Atlas came and demanded the truth, I held it as my last bargaining chip. It would be the key to unlock my freedom when the time was right.

I wasn't too sure what I would eventually earn when I traded my knowledge in the end. Somehow, I couldn't see myself walking the streets carefree ever again. A normal life seemed so far away and impossible anymore. If I was honest, normal died with the rest of my family.

I missed them. I missed my big brother. I hated feeling this alone when I needed someone the most. I couldn't let them die for nothing. Ace obviously believed in what he was doing. If Atlas was telling the truth, they wanted to put an end to the trafficking his father was doing. If I could help them, I would like to try. I really didn't have anything else to do with my life anyway.

I pushed open the doors to the back deck and inhaled the crisp air. I felt weak, mentally and physically. My mind was spinning with possibilities, both good and bad. My nights were restless and my bones ached carrying the emotional load. Atlas ignored me, pushed me aside like the tool I really was. There was a point where I thought he would save me; now I wasn’t too sure.

"You okay? You look pale," Tony said behind me.

"Just fine."

I wasn't fine. I stared over the water until I heard Tony step back inside, no doubt still close by. Despite feeling so lonely, I wanted to be left alone. I wanted company, not a body guard or babysitter.

A chill ran through my body as I looked out over the lake. The trees around me were changing color. This place could actually be very beautiful if you could block out all the bad. I leaned over the railing, looking over and into the murky water. I pulled myself up on the ledge. Slowly, so I wouldn't lose my balance, I pushed myself up upright.

I stood on the wood railing and all I could see was the water. I wanted to block out everything behind me, my past. Confinement, fear, and eminent death waited for me back there. The wind blew through my hair and I felt lighter in the chill with nothing below me but water. My balance wavered but I didn't care if I fell.

"I bet it's freezing," Atlas said behind me. "You going for a swim?"

"I don't know how to swim," I admitted, slowly turning to face him.

Atlas looked perfect as usual. His suit jacket hugged the muscles I knew were under there. His tie was gone but he looked put together. Always in perfect control. He watched me carefully, debating and planning. With measured steps, he came closer until he was right in front of me.

"Get down from there, Stella," he demanded. "Don't make me force you."

I laughed, the bitter sound echoing in the emptiness. My head was fuzzy and I felt tired. Tired of fighting, running and hiding. I wanted it all to be over already. I just didn't know how this story would end. Did it end with my death? My security and a happy ending? Only Atlas could give me any kind of finale.

"Stella, you don't look so good," Atlas said, coming closer and reaching up. "Please get down."

"Now I don't look good?" I asked bitterly. I was acting like a child but couldn't seem to stop it. "It's the black hair, isn't it?"

Atlas sighed and rubbed his face roughly. "I like the hair. That's not what I meant. Just come down."

I shook my head but the movement threw off my whole balance. I stumbled and swayed, losing my footing on the thin railing. When I expected to hit the cold water, warm arms wrapped around me. I hit a hard chest and my body went limp.

"Shit, Stella. You're burning up."

I felt myself moving but I couldn't keep my eyes open. I tried so hard to open them. I needed to see where they were taking me. What if I needed to fight back? I couldn't even lift my head enough to look around. My cheek stayed firmly pressed to Atlas's chest.

"She passed out," Atlas told someone. "She's burning up. What the hell happened?"

"Nothing. She didn't even leave her room," said Tony. "She hasn't eaten or anything."

I heard my bedroom door being kicked open and saw my familiar ceiling. I stared up at this ceiling so often, it was sad I would instantly recognize it. Atlas put me down on my bed and I sunk into the soft mattress and down comforter. His large hands ran over my face and forehead. His touch was gentle and soft, unlike any other way he ever touched me.

"Get something she can drink or eat," Atlas said quietly, followed by the sound of footsteps.

Atlas ran his hands down my face and neck. His fingers were feather light. It was a stark contrast to the roughness he had always showed me.

"You still with me?" he asked quietly.

"Think so," I whispered, my throat sore and raspy. "You can break your promise, Atlas."

"What promise?"

I struggled to open my eyes and finally blinked them open. Atlas's dark eyes were staring down at mine. His face was so close I could smell the faint scent of whiskey. Light stubble lined his strong jaw and I noticed a small scar on his bottom lip. I briefly wondered how he got it.

"I'm no use to you anymore. You can just let me die and Ace will never know the difference," I told him, still staring at his lips and the scar.

"Don't be stupid Stella," he said. "We are gearing up for war here, Little Star. You aren't done here yet, so quit trying to chicken out."

Atlas pulled away from me and my eyes fell closed. A coldness wrapped around me as voices whispered around me. Sounds faded out and back in. Atlas tried to pull me up but I couldn't hold myself up. I wanted to, but I couldn't fight anymore. I had nothing left.

"You need to try to eat this," he said to me, putting a spoon to my lips.

Atlas and Tony force fed me chicken broth. It burned my mouth but the salty familiar taste warmed me from the inside. My head pounded, my eyes burned as I tried to refuse the soup. I didn't want their help. I didn't want anyone's help anymore. I just wanted it to be over.

Just when I thought I was going to have my peace, I was awake. Ice cold water was spraying on me and I gasped in shock.

"What the fuck!" I shouted, trying to get away from the freezing water.

"Stop," Atlas demanded in a voice that made me pause.

He was in his boxers and white collared shirt. He was soaked, holding me in the shower.

"I had to cool you down," he explained. "Your fever got too high."

I relaxed into his chest and let the water cool me down. I was shivering but I could feel the sweat on my skin. My hair was damp so I dipped my head back, letting the cool spray soak through. The sound of my teeth chattering echoed in the large bathroom.

"Thanks," I mumbled, weak and exhausted.

"Don't thank me," he said. "Come on. You need food now that you're conscious."

He reached over and turned off the water. I took Atlas's outstretched hand and let him pull me to my feet. I lost my balance, but Atlas was quick to grab me. His hands held my hips and he looked down at me. We were both soaked in our clothes and his hair dripped water on my face. We were so close, I could feel his body heat and the beat of his heart through his chest.

"Don't give up yet, Stella," he said, running a thumb over my skin. "You are better than that. Better than us."

Atlas didn't give me a chance to respond before he pulled me from the shower. I got my privacy to dry off and put on warm, dry clothes. I was slow and weak, but I could stand on my own two feet. When I stepped into the bedroom, Atlas was sitting on the bed with a tray of food. Too tired to argue, I sat next to him and took the tray when he passed it over.

The soup was chicken noodle from the can but reminded me of home. My mom would make it whenever one of us was sick. The whole family would eat chicken noodle soup and crackers even if just Ace had the cold. Dad teased mom that it was just so she didn't need to cook extra. I think she didn't want one of us to feel left out.

I stared down into the broth and felt my eyes misting over. I tried to blink and hide it in time, but I was too late.

"I followed you," Atlas said, breaking our silence. "My dad sent me down after the cops found the bodies. He tried to tell me one of his enemies went after Ace, taking out the family, but you escaped."

I put down my spoon and looked up at him. I knew he had found me before the night of the club, but I was unsure how far back.

"I watched you at the funeral," he admitted. "I never saw you cry. Even those nights alone, you never broke down."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. Atlas followed me for months. He stalked me, watched me and saw every move I made. I should feel violated, scared and maybe even angry. Somehow knowing that he was somewhere close those dark and lonely nights gave me a sick feeling of comfort. Someone was there.

"I didn't want them to win. I thought that if I never told the police that I saw anything, they would leave me alone," I said. Hearing it out loud, I realized how naive that had been.

"They won't win, Stella. I will make damn sure of it," Atlas said, his voice low and angry. "My father promised he had nothing to do with Ace or your family. He lied to me and will pay for that."

"But he's your father," I said, confused how he could follow in the man's footsteps only to turn his back on him.

"Blood may determine your family, but it doesn't have to be blood shared. It can be blood spilled. Ace died for a reason, and I will finish what he started and make anyone who stood in our way pay."