Текст книги "Vicious secrets"

Автор книги: Morgan Bridges

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 13 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

Chapter 39DELILAH

Earlier that evening…

It takes all morning and most of the afternoon to convince Raven that I’m not in a relationship with Xavier. At least, not the traditional one. I might be his bride, but that’s far removed from being a girlfriend.

He’d be nice to a girlfriend. If he ever decided to date. Maybe.

Right now, he’s an asshole who’s making threats and demands, which pisses me off more than I care to admit. What I hate more is the thrill that zips along my skin every time I think about him touching me.

After hanging out with my roommate and June all day, under Declan’s watchful eye, I grab something for dinner and head back to the dorm room. It’s quiet without Raven, but she’s busy with her poetry club. Or plans for world domination, knowing her.

Considering Xavier’s fierce demand for Declan to watch over me, I’m surprised he didn’t haul me back to the fraternity. Maybe he wanted some alone time with June. He hasn’t been able to take his eyes off of her to actually watch me. Not that I mind. A night alone without the Order or its minions is nice.

As the sun sets, I sprawl out on my bed with my stomach full, my body sore from last night’s activities. I’m tempted to crawl underneath the blanket and go to sleep although it’s only eight, but a knock on the door has me on my feet. I was under the impression that Xavier would be gone longer than that. So why do I feel nervous and jittery at the idea of him returning so soon?

I open the door and a wave of disappointment washes over me when it’s not Xavier. That emotion is quickly replaced with pain and anger, making my chest tight and my face warm. I fold my arms as if to shield myself from the emotions churning inside me.

“What are you doing here, Ben?”

“I need to talk to you.”

I glare at him. “I texted you for weeks, and nothing. Not even a fucking thumbs up. Now you want to talk?”

He flinches. “Please, Lilah. I’ll explain everything.”

“Go ahead.”

“Not here.” He looks up and down the hallway and shakes his head. “Let’s take a walk.”

I study him, taking in his shoulders slumping and how his eyes are filled with regret. My heart cracks a little in my chest. This is Ben, my only family besides the girls and Gloria. But they’re not here, and he is.

“Fine.” I step out of the room and shut the door behind me. “But the minute I feel like you’re hiding shit from me, I’m leaving.”

He sighs. “I understand. Come on.”

Ben guides me outside and into the cool evening air. We walk side by side, the muted sounds of our footsteps the only disturbance in the otherwise silent night. The university, usually bustling and vibrant during the day, feels abandoned now, its buildings standing like silent guardians over the empty walkways.

The path itself winds through the campus, leading us away from the main sections and into the more secluded areas where tall oaks and maples stand. Their leaves whisper above us, a hushed conversation that seems to foretell the one we’re about to have. Here, removed from the rest of the world, everything feels more intimate, as if it’s just Ben and me.

The way things were before I met Xavier.

Ben leans against the trunk of a large oak and faces me, arms crossed. “I don’t even know where to begin.”

“How about starting with the reason you never responded to my text messages? It’d better be a good one too.”

“Before I answer you, I need you to promise me something.” His gaze, so familiar and warm, is now cold and distant. “You can’t tell anyone what I’m about to say. If you do, it’ll put you in danger. Actually, just me telling you is enough to fuck us both.”

I purse my lips. “Is it because of the cult you’re in?”

“It’s not a cult. The Obsidian Order is a secret society. By revealing its secrets, I’m breaking my vow of silence.” Ben averts his gaze and blows out a breath. “It’s punishable by death.”

“Maybe I don’t want to know.”

That’s a lie. I want to know everything.

Regardless of what Ben thinks, I already believe the Order is a looming threat over my life. The second I found out about their power and reach into society, I knew I couldn’t run from them. The only choice left is to learn about them and find a way to survive the duration of my contract.

I won't let myself speculate about what’ll happen afterwards.

“I trust you,” Ben says. “I always have, and I always will.”

“I’m not going to say anything to anyone. I just want to understand what I’m dealing with.”

“It’s an assassin’s guild, Lilah.”

My mouth falls open and no words come out. I gape at him for several seconds before snapping my jaw closed, hard enough for my teeth to click together. “Like as in… killing people?”

Ben gives me a wry smile. “Is there a different type of assassin?”

“No, but… Seriously?” When he nods, I blink several times, trying to wrap my mind around this. “Well, fuck me sideways. This is worse than I thought.”

“What did you think was happening?”

I throw up my hands. “I don’t know. After the bride ceremony, I thought you guys were a group of demented perverts, but I never thought you murdered people. That’s just…”

“It’s insane. I’m aware.”

“Have you ever… you know?”

Ben’s expression turns stony. “Yes. I’ve been summoned by the Order.”

“Is that what a ‘summons’ means?”

“Yes.”

“So right now Xavier is⁠—”

I slap a hand over my mouth. Whatever I say about Xavier also applies to Ben, and I don’t want to hurt him with my judgmental thoughts. And they’re judgy as fuck. Given the way his mouth pulls into a frown, I don’t think I’m successful in hiding the fact.

“Yes, he’s on assignment somewhere,” Ben says. “We’re discouraged from contacting anyone during that time. That’s why I didn’t text you. I swear the Order tracks our phones and reads our messages, and I didn’t want to put you at risk.”

“How did you get caught in this shit?”

“I’m the bastard son of a founding family member,” he says. “Apparently, my mother didn’t want me, but she didn’t want my father to have me either. She thought it would hurt his legacy if he couldn’t find me. It’s hard to say because they’re both dead. Who knows why the rich do anything, unless it’s to gain more power?”

“The rich include you now.”

“Don’t say that,” he snaps. “I’m still the same person. I won’t let them change me.”

I don’t have the heart to point out that they already have. The Ben I know only talked about killing someone, but never would’ve done it. Now, he’s taken a life—or more than one—and he’s able to tell me without hesitation.

I walk up to Ben and place a tentative hand on his forearm. “I’m sorry.”

He covers my hand with his. “It’s not your fault. Sometimes I think you’re in this mess because of me. Maybe if we hadn’t grown up together, the Order wouldn’t have targeted you.”

“My contract?”

“It’s legit, but the reason behind it is bullshit. From what I understand, they choose brides who have no money to fight the Order, and no family to miss them if they were to disappear.”

I jerk back my hand as if he burned me. “Oh.”

Ben reaches for me, grabbing my arms, keeping me still. His gaze searches mine, pleading for understanding. Something I don't know if I can give.

His grip tightens slightly, his fingers pressing into my skin with a mix of urgency and desperation. “That’s not how I see you. You’re the most important person in my life, Lilah.”

He releases one of my arms to brush a stray lock of hair from my face, his touch gentle yet heavy with unspoken remorse. I wait for his touch to ignite the spark Xavier’s does. It doesn’t come. I’m not willing to admit that he was right about Ben’s feelings toward me, but I know for certain that I don’t reciprocate them.

“I know and I care about you too,” I say. “You’re my family.”

I step back with a small smile, my stomach twisting at the hurt expression that flits across Ben’s face. He lets his arms fall to his sides, a sigh of defeat leaving his chest.

“Family,” he repeats in a whisper.

“The Order is wrong. If anything happens to me, I know you’ll miss me.”

“Don’t say that!” His voice echoes in the air, ricocheting off the trees. “I won’t let anything happen to you, before or after your contract is up.”

I shrug with a nonchalance I don’t feel. “I’m sure everything will be fine.”

He gazes at me like I’ve lost my mind. Maybe I have. Finding out that there’s a group of killers running around on campus kind of fucks with your brain. Especially when one of the recruits eats out your pussy like it’s his last meal.

Fucking Xavier.

OceanofPDF.com

Chapter 40DELILAH

Ben clears his throat, and the noise pulls me out of my dirty thoughts. My cheeks flush, and I duck my head, hoping he doesn’t notice.

“I’ve been trained to fight since the first day I got here,” he says. There’s a hint of pride mixed in with something darker in his voice. “For the last three years, I’ve learned about poisons, weapons, and anything else required to carry out a summons. They’ve turned me into a soldier, but I’ll use my skills to protect you. I just have to make it through the Trials.”

“You will.”

He nods, his gaze reflecting the uncertainty coursing through me. “I’m going to, or die trying. It’s a series of tests, designed to prove that I’m capable of whatever the Order tells me to do. They’re not easy. Some people don’t make it through.”

“If it’s dangerous, why are you doing this?”

“I wasn’t given a choice,” he says. “The Order sees it as my duty to serve my bloodline and the organization that’s been around for centuries. It’s bigger than me, and I’m powerless to stop it.”

“What happens when you pass Trials? Will they ease up on you?”

“I’ll be fully inducted. I’ll go from being a recruit to a crow, expected to carry out missions while running my family’s tech empire.”

I scrunch my face. “A crow?”

“A group of crows is called a ‘murder.’ It works for a league of assassins. Don’t you think?” He smiles at me.

My laughter is high-pitched, bordering on hysterical. “I can’t argue with that.”

“There’s more to it. The bird has always been synonymous with death, but it’s also one of the most intelligent and highly territorial. I guess whoever came up with the symbol hundreds of years ago had a poetic side.” He shrugs. “It doesn’t matter. I’ve earned my wings.”

I make a face. “What does that mean?”

He grins at me. “You’ll find out during the Crow’s Covenant tomorrow night. It’s one of the few events the brides are allowed to attend.”

“Xavier will be back by then,” I say, recalling how his father said so. I didn’t get it at the time, but now that I do, I find that morbid curiosity rising in me like it always does.

Ben makes a noncommittal noise. “Yeah, X.”

“You don’t like him?”

I pose it as a question when we both know it’s not. The way Ben acted around Xavier the night of the Bride Hunt was a side of him that I’d never seen before. Even now, I can’t make sense of it.

My foster brother pauses, his gaze shifting before returning to mine. “It’s not that I don’t like him. X and I have been friends for the last three years. He saved my life on the first day of initiation.”

Ben’s voice takes on a tone of reluctant admiration. I can relate. Xavier is always pulling emotion from me that I wish didn’t exist. Even now, finding out that he saved Ben’s life does something to my heart. It softens it. Weakens it.

“I’m still pissed at him for claiming you as his bride,” Ben mutters.

The brand on my skin throbs as the memories of that night flit through my mind. I’m bound to Xavier for a year, but this mark on my shoulder is permanent in a way that infuriates me. Yes, I can have it removed, but it shouldn’t have been put there in the first place.

“You and me both,” I say. “At least you’re not the one with a fucking ‘D’ on your body.” A thought strikes, giving me pause. “Would you have branded me if you’d been the one to catch me?”

Ben runs a hand through his hair. “I would’ve had to. You saw the way the council member was with X. Any deviation from the norm is grounds for punishment. I’m not talking about just being reprimanded. When it comes to the Order, nothing is off limits.”

A chill skitters along arms that has nothing to do with the night air. “I get it.”

He takes a step toward me. “But that doesn’t mean I would’ve wanted to. You’re not property, Delilah.”

“I feel like it. I don’t want to belong to Xavier.”

He takes another step. “I’m going to try to take you from him.”

I blink. “How?”

“By out-scoring him and the other recruits during the Trials. The brides go to the top three performers.” Ben cups my cheeks with both hands and tilts my head up . “I will be one of them.”

“Why?”

“To protect you.”

“Xavier said the same thing.”

Ben clenches his jaw. “You belong with me. I know you more than anyone. I can make you happy.”

“This is a contract, not a marriage.”

“It might as well be,” he snaps, his grip tightening on my face. “You have to do whatever he wants. It makes me fucking sick to think of you with him.”

“I think now’s a good time to take your fucking hands off of her.”

The dark voice has Ben swinging around and shoving me behind him. I stumble before gaining my footing. Once I’m not about to faceplant, I lean around Ben to find Declan standing there.

He juts his chin at me. “That bride doesn’t belong to you, McKenzie.”

Ben stiffens, tension lining his shoulders. “She doesn’t belong to you either. Mind your fucking business.”

Declan blows out a breath. “Unfortunately, that fucker X put me on bride-sitting duty. So she’s coming with me.”

I step from behind Ben and lift both my hands, one palm facing each man. “Both of you need to hold the fuck up. I’m going back to my dorm room. After that, you can have a pissing contest, or whatever guys do to establish dominance. All I know is you’re not slinging your shlongs in front of me.”

The pair of them look at me with wide eyes. Ben groans and massages his forehead while Declan grins. I flip them off.

“Listen, I’m already caught up in the pile of shit the Order dumped on me,” I say. “I’m not interested in adding more to it by pissing them off. Leave me alone, and I promise I’ll stay put.”

“That’s not how this works, bride,” Declan says. “You’re going to Xavier’s room. I let you have your freedom during the day, but at night you need to be behind a locked door with security. It’s the safest option.”

I look at Ben, and he gives me a reluctant nod. “He’s right. The dorm rooms in the fraternity are the best choice.”

“Whatever,” I mumble. “Let’s get this over with.”

They fall into step beside me, one recruit on either side. It unnerves me. There’s something about their energy that’s unusual. Maybe it’s because I know they’re killers or that they wield power in a way that’s foreign to me. I’ve never had money or authority, let alone inherited an empire.

I glance at Declan. “What industry does your family control?”

He flicks his narrowed gaze to Ben. “I see someone’s been running his fucking mouth.”

My foster brother rolls his eyes. “It’s not like she’s stupid. She was going to figure it out anyway.”

Declan eyes Ben for a moment. “When my father passes, I’ll take over his medical dynasty.”

“That’s not so bad,” I say.

As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I recall the story June told us about Declan and his late-night visit to a clinic filled with suspicious people. And organs.

Oh, fuck.

Declan grins at me, but it’s all teeth and no smile. Similar to a shark. “I save lives. Hospitals, clinics, research facilities… we own them, but the real market is a supply and demand we’re not going to talk about.”

Ben’s expression darkens, and he steps closer as if to shield me from Declan. “The Order’s reach extends into gray areas.”

“Gray?” Declan laughs. “It’s more like pitch-black. Another reason we’re called crows, man. Let’s just say that my family provides specialized healthcare services and leave it at that.”

“And you?” I ask Ben. “What does a tech dynasty look like?”

Declan interjects before my foster brother can answer me. “It looks like fucking everything. This bastard can hack his way into almost anything. Records, finances, satellites.”

“Now who has a big fucking mouth,” Ben growls.

“You broke the seal, man.” Declan shrugs. “Like you said, she’s not stupid. I haven’t known her for long, but she’s likely to get into trouble and poke her nose where it doesn’t belong.”

Ben nods. “You don’t know the half of it.”

“Hey!” I glare at one of them and then the other. “Do me a favor and punch each other in the dicks, yeah?”

OceanofPDF.com

Chapter 41DELILAH

As soon as I’m alone in Xavier’s room, I go through his things like a trash panda looking for food. I dig through his drawers, his bathroom cabinets, and anything else that might give me a better idea of who this man is. The things I already know about him are scary.

After a while I plop onto his bed, completely exhausted and unsuccessful. Xavier remains a mystery. What drives someone like him? Wealth, status, or power? Maybe all three.

My goals are much simpler. To be loved and feel safe. These concepts are basic, yet so elusive in my life. Plus, I’m not any closer to accomplishing either. If anything, I’ve taken steps backward.

The situation I find myself in offers nothing good. There’s a part of me that feels more threatened than when I lived in Frank’s house. Although the danger here is different.

Xavier Donovan threatens to take more than my body. He could take my very soul.

Images of him flit through my mind and I release a sigh, half frustration and the other resignation. I have to find a way to navigate this dynamic, only it’s like walking a tightrope and any miscalculation could send me plummeting to my literal and figurative death.

I want to strip him of the power he has over me, but I don’t know how. Becoming Xavier’s ally is ideal, except he’s made it very clear he wants more than my cooperation. He said I’d beg him.

The problem is, he could be right…

When I think about the hunger in Xavier’s gaze and the undeniable pull between us, it’s terrifying. I blame it on physical attraction, but there’s something more, something deeper that I refuse to acknowledge.

He has a way of looking at me as if I’m the only person that exists. That intensity is overwhelming. Despite not trusting him fully, I find myself drawn to Xavier in a way that I can’t explain.

Lying on his bed, surrounded by his things, I close my eyes to block out everything. Maybe the key to surviving this ordeal with my heart intact is to simply confront my fears and desires. Both center around the man holding me captive.

A rapid succession of soft knocks on the door snap me out of my reverie, and I sit up, my gaze alert and focused. For a split second I think Xavier has returned and that I’ll have to face my demons sooner than I’d planned. However, logic is quick to point out that he wouldn’t hesitate to enter his room.

Maybe it’s Ben?

I slide from the bed and head toward the door. A mixture of curiosity and unease slithers through me, growing the closer I get. Meanwhile, the knocks persist, a clear sign that whoever’s on the other side has no intention of leaving.

The monitor mounted on the wall next to the door reveals an image that’s crisp and clear, displaying the hallway outside. The camera positioned above the doorway captures every detail with precision, from the dim lighting of the corridor to the textures of the carpet.

As well as Brenda’s tear-streaked face.

The young woman stands in front of the door, her disheveled image on the monitor making my breath hitch. The screen displays the disarray of her hair, the way it falls in unkempt waves around her shoulders, and her clothes, normally pristine, are wrinkled. The stark contrast of her pale skin to the bruises dotted across her face makes my stomach churn.

However, her eyes are what gut me. She gazes at the camera with a vulnerability and desperation that makes her look like a wild animal being hunted. Stress lines her hunched shoulders, and her eyes flit back and forth in a series of nervous glances.

I open the door and the weight of her stare has my muscles going taut with wariness even as compassion floods my chest. “Brenda, what are you doing here?”

“Hey, Delilah.” Her voice is low, filled with hesitation, her eyes searching mine for something I can’t decipher. “I… I need to talk to Xavier. It’s important.”

Hearing her say his name does something to me. It’s like a switch being flipped, releasing all of my pent up frustration. The dark, insecure part of me wants to slam the door in her face, but the rational side says it’s not her fault.

It’s Xavier’s.

He’s the one who fooled around with her and then chose me as his bride afterward. He’s the one who encouraged Brenda to seek him out for… whatever reason. He’s the one who has the power to make us both feel tied to him and his decisions.

I pull in a deep breath, desperately trying to stifle the spread of the jealousy already running rampant. This moment isn’t about Xavier. It’s about a woman needing help.

“He’s not here,” I say. “And I have no idea when he’ll be back.”

She narrows her eyes, suspicion written all over her face.

“Do you want to talk about it?” I sweep my gaze along the bruises covering her jaw and her busted lip. “I’m a good listener.”

Brenda drops her head, and her brow furrows with her thoughts. When her gaze finds mine, it’s swirling with uncertainty. “This is… complicated. And you can’t help me.”

“What happened to you? Was it your recruit?”

“Who else?” She scoffs. “Eric’s an asshole to rival all assholes.” She presses her lips together and regret flits over her features. “Forget I said anything.”

“I won’t say a word. I know I can’t help you, but what do you want Xavier to do?”

She throws up her arms and covers her face, distress and desperation in every movement. “I don’t know. I thought maybe he could protect me by making me his bride instead of you.”

The air around me crackles with tension as her words sink deep into my bones, making them heavy. My arms hang listlessly at my sides while I stand there with my lips slightly parted in shock.

Would Xavier trade me for Brenda? Can he?

The idea creates a maelstrom of emotion that threatens to drown me. Insecurities from my past rise like ghost ships at sea, full of corpses and other things left buried. Fear of abandonment, even by a man I hardly know, wraps around my throat and squeezes the life from me.

Not wanting to be Xavier’s bride is one thing, but when it comes to another recruit, the choice is clear. I’d rather be Xavier’s whore than another man’s punching bag. However, that might not be up to me.

And that scares the shit out of me.

I stand there, speechless, my mind racing through different scenarios and possible outcomes. The very thought of Xavier choosing Brenda over me isn’t hard to grasp. They have history. Intimate history.

She drops her hands and stares at me, her eyes mirroring the turmoil within me. “I’m sorry. I know this is fucked up. I just thought that if I had Xavier’s protection, things would be better. He tried to help me once, and I rejected it. Now, I’d do anything to have him back.”

Her admission only fuels the flames of doubt and fear charring my insides. “Xavier chose me. Can he just give me away?”

Brenda shrugs. “I don’t know. That’s why I’m here. I wanted to ask him if there’s any chance for us.”

“Us?” I repeat, my voice a squeak.

“Yeah. I know he cares about me, or he wouldn’t have tried to get me into rehab.”

The word “us” echoes in my mind, the implications reverberating with unspoken and unanswered questions. Brenda’s mention of rehab adds another layer to the complexity of their relationship. There’s clearly a history of feelings that I wasn’t aware of, but it doesn’t matter.

Xavier wanted to be there for her.

“I see.” I force the words from my mouth, eager to be finished with this conversation. “Like I said, Xavier’s not here, but you two do have a lot to talk about.”

Brenda’s lips thin. “I’m not trying to screw you. I just need to get away from Eric. He…” She shudders. “Anyway, I’ll see you around.”

Her words, meant to smooth out the tension, only amplify my fear. A year is a long time to fulfill a contract.

OceanofPDF.com